This Man Confessed
Page 2
‘There.’ Mum turns me around and sweeps my hair back over my shoulder. She’s looking at me thoughtfully, and I know what’s coming. ‘Darling, can your mother offer you some advice?’
‘No.’ I answer quickly on a small smile.
She returns my smile and sits me on the end of the bed. ‘When you become a wife, you become the core of your husband.’ She smiles fondly. ‘Let him think he’s in charge, let him think you can’t live without him, but never let him take your independence or identity, darling. They need their ego’s stroked, these men.’ She laughs a little. ‘They like to think they’re wearing the trousers, and you have to let them believe it.’
I shake my head a little. ‘Mum, this isn’t necessary.’
‘Yes, it is.’ she insists. ‘Men are complicated creatures.’
I scoff. She has no idea how complicated my creature is. ‘I know.’
‘And whilst they maintain a strong, manly façade, they are weak without us!’ She pulls my blushing face to hers. ‘Ava, I can see that Jesse loves you, and I admire his frankness when it comes to how he feels about you, but remember who you are. Never let him change you, darling.’
‘He won’t change me, mum.’ I’m not at all comfortable with this conversation. Mum and dad stayed with us for two days after Jesse proposed, and have been back in London since Wednesday, so they have had the full-on experience of Jesse’s way with me, minus the countdowns and various degrees of fuckings. They have witnessed the smothering, the constant touching and affection, and their quiet observations haven’t gone unnoticed. Not on my part, anyway. Jesse is oblivious. No, not oblivious, he just doesn’t care, and I’m not about to stop him. I crave the constant contact, just as much as he does.
Mum smiles at me. ‘He wants to look after you, and he’s made it quite clear you’re precious to him. It makes me and your father so happy to know that you’ve found a man who adores you, a man who’ll walk through fire for you.’
‘I adore him, too.’ I say quietly. The sincerity of my mum’s words is tugging at my vocal cords, making my voice a little quivery. ‘Please don’t make me cry. My make-up will be ruined.’
She clasps my cheeks in her palms and plants a kiss on my lips. ‘Yes, let’s stop with the emotional stuff. Just don’t ever do anything that you don’t want to. I can also see he could be quite persuasive.’ I actually laugh, and mum laughs with me. Persuasive? ‘It’s such a shame his family couldn’t be here.’ she muses.
I wince a little. ‘I’ve told you, they live abroad. They’re not very close.’ I’ve only vaguely outlined the reason for Jesse’s lack of family. Very vaguely. The story that Jesse spun me when we first met sufficed. It’s perfectly plausible.
‘Money,’ she sighs. ‘It causes more family rifts than anything else.’
‘It does,’ I agree. So do sex houses and playboy uncles.
We’re interrupted by another knock at the door and Mum leaves me on the bed to answer it. ‘Oh, that’ll be Kate.’ she sings.
‘I have drinks! Wow, Elizabeth, you look incredible!’ Kate’s excited voice creeps into the room before she barrels past my mother and hits me with delighted blue eyes. ‘Aren’t you dressed yet?’ she asks, setting a tray on the wooden chest. She looks fabulous in a simple, ivory satin dress, her long curls a mass of red flames surrounding her pale face—my only bridesmaid, but with the enthusiasm of ten.
‘Just about to.’ I stand myself up and adjust my boobs in my cups again.
‘Here, have one of these.’ She thrusts a glass of pink liquid at me.
‘Oh, yes, you must!’ Mum chants, closing the door and hastily making her way over to scoop one up for herself. She takes a long sip and gasps. ‘Oh, that little Italian knows how to keep a lady happy.’
I shake my head at the glass that’s floating in front of me. ‘No, I’m fine.’ I don’t want alcohol breath under Jesse’s nose.
‘It’ll sort your nerves.’ Kate insists, taking my hand and placing the glass in it. ‘Drink.’
She knows the cause of my nerves. I’ve made Kate check the padlock and private suites a million times, too. She nods at the glass with raised eyebrows and I relent, taking a generous swig of Mario’s Most Marvellous. It tastes as marvellous as ever, but no amount of alcohol is going to cure me.
‘Where’s Jesse?’ I ask, setting my glass down. I’ve not seen him since last night. Knowing my mum’s traditional views, I insisted we sleep separately on the night before our wedding. He refused to leave my room until one minute to midnight, and then he did so in a mighty huff when my mum was banging on the door. I could see he was dying to trample all over her, but, surprisingly, he conceded without too much fuss, just a ferocious scowl at my mum as she guided him from the room.
‘I think he’s getting ready.’ Kate downs a Most Marvellous.
‘Katie Matthews, take it easy!’ Mum scorns, taking the glass from her. ‘You’ve got all day to go.’
‘Sorry.’ Kate flicks me a cheeky grin. I know why she’s hitting the drink so early: theDan and Sam combination.
‘What about my dad and brother?’
‘At the bar, Ava. All of the men are at the bar.’ Kate emphasises all.
‘All of the men?’ I ask. ‘Like all of the men, including Sam?’
Kate nods in agreement to my obvious thoughts. ‘Yes, all of the men, except Jesse and including Sam… and Dan.’
I wince. Today is going to be tough for Kate. Dan delayed his return to Australia so he could be here for my wedding, but he hasn’t said much, neither on the night of the proposal or since. He doesn’t need to. It’s obvious that he’s struggling with both the direction of my life and being near Kate, especially with an oblivious Sam on the scene. Kate’s struggling too, although trying to appear unaffected.
‘Come on, then.’ Kate claps her hands. ‘Are you getting dressed or walking down the aisle in that? I’m sure he won’t mind.’
I smile at my fiery friend. She knows Jesse’s compulsion for lace, but my mum doesn’t. ‘I’m getting dressed.’ I unpack my heels from the tissue paper and slip them on, raising me by four inches. ‘Right,’ I take a deep breath and make my way over to the door, where my dress is waiting for me.
‘Perhaps you should use the toilet before we get you into it.’ Mum suggests, joining me by the dress. ‘Oh, Ava. I’ve never seen anything like it.’
I hum my agreement, my eyes drifting up and down the full length. ‘I know. And yes, I need a wee.’ I leave my mum admiring my dress and head for the bathroom, catching Kate having another quick glug while my mum’s back is turned. If I wasn’t so concerned about my wedding venue, I might be concerned about spending the day with Dan and Kate within spitting distance of each other.
I shut the door quietly before using the toilet and relishing in another private moment. Then I hear a loud knock on the suite door, followed by the unmistakably panicked voice of my mother. Wondering what’s going on, I make quick work of sorting myself out and washing my hands before exiting the bathroom.
‘No.’ I answer quickly on a small smile.
She returns my smile and sits me on the end of the bed. ‘When you become a wife, you become the core of your husband.’ She smiles fondly. ‘Let him think he’s in charge, let him think you can’t live without him, but never let him take your independence or identity, darling. They need their ego’s stroked, these men.’ She laughs a little. ‘They like to think they’re wearing the trousers, and you have to let them believe it.’
I shake my head a little. ‘Mum, this isn’t necessary.’
‘Yes, it is.’ she insists. ‘Men are complicated creatures.’
I scoff. She has no idea how complicated my creature is. ‘I know.’
‘And whilst they maintain a strong, manly façade, they are weak without us!’ She pulls my blushing face to hers. ‘Ava, I can see that Jesse loves you, and I admire his frankness when it comes to how he feels about you, but remember who you are. Never let him change you, darling.’
‘He won’t change me, mum.’ I’m not at all comfortable with this conversation. Mum and dad stayed with us for two days after Jesse proposed, and have been back in London since Wednesday, so they have had the full-on experience of Jesse’s way with me, minus the countdowns and various degrees of fuckings. They have witnessed the smothering, the constant touching and affection, and their quiet observations haven’t gone unnoticed. Not on my part, anyway. Jesse is oblivious. No, not oblivious, he just doesn’t care, and I’m not about to stop him. I crave the constant contact, just as much as he does.
Mum smiles at me. ‘He wants to look after you, and he’s made it quite clear you’re precious to him. It makes me and your father so happy to know that you’ve found a man who adores you, a man who’ll walk through fire for you.’
‘I adore him, too.’ I say quietly. The sincerity of my mum’s words is tugging at my vocal cords, making my voice a little quivery. ‘Please don’t make me cry. My make-up will be ruined.’
She clasps my cheeks in her palms and plants a kiss on my lips. ‘Yes, let’s stop with the emotional stuff. Just don’t ever do anything that you don’t want to. I can also see he could be quite persuasive.’ I actually laugh, and mum laughs with me. Persuasive? ‘It’s such a shame his family couldn’t be here.’ she muses.
I wince a little. ‘I’ve told you, they live abroad. They’re not very close.’ I’ve only vaguely outlined the reason for Jesse’s lack of family. Very vaguely. The story that Jesse spun me when we first met sufficed. It’s perfectly plausible.
‘Money,’ she sighs. ‘It causes more family rifts than anything else.’
‘It does,’ I agree. So do sex houses and playboy uncles.
We’re interrupted by another knock at the door and Mum leaves me on the bed to answer it. ‘Oh, that’ll be Kate.’ she sings.
‘I have drinks! Wow, Elizabeth, you look incredible!’ Kate’s excited voice creeps into the room before she barrels past my mother and hits me with delighted blue eyes. ‘Aren’t you dressed yet?’ she asks, setting a tray on the wooden chest. She looks fabulous in a simple, ivory satin dress, her long curls a mass of red flames surrounding her pale face—my only bridesmaid, but with the enthusiasm of ten.
‘Just about to.’ I stand myself up and adjust my boobs in my cups again.
‘Here, have one of these.’ She thrusts a glass of pink liquid at me.
‘Oh, yes, you must!’ Mum chants, closing the door and hastily making her way over to scoop one up for herself. She takes a long sip and gasps. ‘Oh, that little Italian knows how to keep a lady happy.’
I shake my head at the glass that’s floating in front of me. ‘No, I’m fine.’ I don’t want alcohol breath under Jesse’s nose.
‘It’ll sort your nerves.’ Kate insists, taking my hand and placing the glass in it. ‘Drink.’
She knows the cause of my nerves. I’ve made Kate check the padlock and private suites a million times, too. She nods at the glass with raised eyebrows and I relent, taking a generous swig of Mario’s Most Marvellous. It tastes as marvellous as ever, but no amount of alcohol is going to cure me.
‘Where’s Jesse?’ I ask, setting my glass down. I’ve not seen him since last night. Knowing my mum’s traditional views, I insisted we sleep separately on the night before our wedding. He refused to leave my room until one minute to midnight, and then he did so in a mighty huff when my mum was banging on the door. I could see he was dying to trample all over her, but, surprisingly, he conceded without too much fuss, just a ferocious scowl at my mum as she guided him from the room.
‘I think he’s getting ready.’ Kate downs a Most Marvellous.
‘Katie Matthews, take it easy!’ Mum scorns, taking the glass from her. ‘You’ve got all day to go.’
‘Sorry.’ Kate flicks me a cheeky grin. I know why she’s hitting the drink so early: theDan and Sam combination.
‘What about my dad and brother?’
‘At the bar, Ava. All of the men are at the bar.’ Kate emphasises all.
‘All of the men?’ I ask. ‘Like all of the men, including Sam?’
Kate nods in agreement to my obvious thoughts. ‘Yes, all of the men, except Jesse and including Sam… and Dan.’
I wince. Today is going to be tough for Kate. Dan delayed his return to Australia so he could be here for my wedding, but he hasn’t said much, neither on the night of the proposal or since. He doesn’t need to. It’s obvious that he’s struggling with both the direction of my life and being near Kate, especially with an oblivious Sam on the scene. Kate’s struggling too, although trying to appear unaffected.
‘Come on, then.’ Kate claps her hands. ‘Are you getting dressed or walking down the aisle in that? I’m sure he won’t mind.’
I smile at my fiery friend. She knows Jesse’s compulsion for lace, but my mum doesn’t. ‘I’m getting dressed.’ I unpack my heels from the tissue paper and slip them on, raising me by four inches. ‘Right,’ I take a deep breath and make my way over to the door, where my dress is waiting for me.
‘Perhaps you should use the toilet before we get you into it.’ Mum suggests, joining me by the dress. ‘Oh, Ava. I’ve never seen anything like it.’
I hum my agreement, my eyes drifting up and down the full length. ‘I know. And yes, I need a wee.’ I leave my mum admiring my dress and head for the bathroom, catching Kate having another quick glug while my mum’s back is turned. If I wasn’t so concerned about my wedding venue, I might be concerned about spending the day with Dan and Kate within spitting distance of each other.
I shut the door quietly before using the toilet and relishing in another private moment. Then I hear a loud knock on the suite door, followed by the unmistakably panicked voice of my mother. Wondering what’s going on, I make quick work of sorting myself out and washing my hands before exiting the bathroom.
