This Regret
Page 118
Hesitating for a moment, I yank my panties up, run for the door and reach for the handle, making my way outside. It only takes a few seconds before I hear footsteps behind me.
The blast of a 38-caliber revolver sends me crashing to my knees, landing in the road, with gravel digging deep into the flesh of my knees.
My hands grip the gritty ground, as if my life depends on it, making my fingers bleed. Who knows, at this point, maybe it does.
Even with my eyes closed, I can feel the world spinning around me, my body threatening to give up and lose what control I have left. Tears stream down my horror-stricken face and a silent scream is threatening to form in my throat. It hurts. It hurts like hell.
That’s when I hear it. A bloodcurdling scream that makes my blood run cold. Except, it’s not my screaming that is roaring through my ears as I expected.
It’s the screaming of a woman. A very angry, hysterical woman.
The only thing I can decipher is, “Call 911. Somebody f**king call 911. There’s blood everywhere.”
I can hear bodies shuffling nearby, some of them even tripping over me to get away, but I can only process one thought. He’s gone. Please don’t let him be gone.
With force, I am yanked to my feet, a large hand smacking me across the face, causing blood to taste on my tongue.
I try to focus, but my vision is too blurred to make any sense of who has control of my body and at this point, I’m not so sure it even matters.
“This is your fault,” the deep voice growls as I spit blood onto his filthy boots. Narrowing his eyes, he wraps my hair securely around his hand and yanks my head back, hard, while his other hand tightens around my throat, squeezing. “You’re going to pay for this if it’s the last thing I do, you stupid bitch.”
He lets go of my neck and shoves me down to the ground so that my face is pressed into the gravel, his boot crushing into the back of my skull. Dirt and rocks dig into my left eye, making it even harder to see through the tears. I desperately look for the man that hasn’t only crushed then stolen my heart just to crush it again, but has also replaced a part of me that I thought was long ago lost.
Realizing that my search is pointless, I just lay there defeated, feeling half-alive, but mostly dead. “Go ahead,” I whisper. “See if you can hurt me anymore than you already have. I dare you.” My body’s trembling, but I look him dead in the eye anyways. I’m not scared of dying. Not after losing the biggest part of me, my heart. “Losing him will be my last regret.” I shift so that I’m looking at the deep scars that cover his face. They make me sick. He makes me sick. “That and not killing you when I had the chance.”
I close my eyes waiting for his blow, but it doesn’t come. Instead, he is yanked from me and slammed down to the ground, beside me. Scrambling to get away, I crawl backwards with my hands and wipe at my eyes, trying to see what’s going on next to me.
My heart beats wild in my chest and a burst of happiness surges through me when I see it’s Kellan on top of the man, beating the crap out of him. He slams his fist into his face repeatedly while growling out words I can’t understand.
The man seems to look surprised, just lying there taking his beating, without struggle. Kellan grabs him by the hair and puts his face inches from his. “If I ever hear of you coming near my woman or my family again, I will f**king kill you. You will be dead . . . like Cape. My family is everything to me.”
Shoving the guy’s head into the ground, Kellan stands up and walks over to me. He drops to his knees in front of me and cups my face, desperately bringing his lips to mine. “I love you so f**kin’ much. I’m so sorry,” he cries. “I’m sorry for letting them hurt you. I couldn't let him do that to you. I can't bear to see another man rubbing his hands on you.” He rubs his bloodied hands over my hair, looking me in the eyes. “I promise if you can ever forgive me, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I will never leave again and I will make sure no one ever hurts you. I promise, baby I swear I didn't know it was a set up. I would have never left if I had. You have to believe me; I need you to believe me.”
I break out in tears, holding onto him as tight as I can. He’s alive. That’s all I can think about. I have no idea what happened in there, but he’s alive and in my arms. Just the thought of losing him made me dead inside; completely vacant of all feeling.
He pulls me closer into his arms and we both cry. He’s holding me as if he never wants to let go. I never want him to. I want him forever. He’s my life; my everything, but . . . I know I’m about to lose him. A man is dead because of him.
“Kellan,” I cry into his neck. “I thought you were dead.” I wrap my arm tighter around his neck and kiss him as if my life depends on it and it does, trust me it does. “I never want to lose you. I love you more than life. Don’t ever scare me again. Do you f**king hear me?” I look into his eyes, taking in his bruised and bloodied face, a sick feeling settling in my stomach. “We have to get you out of here. They’re going to come take you to jail. I can’t lose you; I won’t lose you again. We can run away together; leave the country, whatever it takes to keep us together.”
I know I’m being irrational and not thinking, but I can’t help it. I won’t lose him again. He means everything to me. I stand up and pull him to his feet. I try pulling him away, but he stops me.
He nods his head towards the door of the warehouse as the woman steps out the door and falls to her knees. Leaning in, he grabs my face and presses his lips next to my ear. “I didn’t shoot him, Phoenix.” He pulls away and looks at the woman crying on the ground. “It was Maxine.”
I throw my hands to my face as more tears stream out. I know I should feel relieved, but I’m sad for the woman and very confused. She was here with Cape, not Kellan. I was right when I thought she didn’t look as if she wanted to kiss him, but still, why would she shoot her own boyfriend? “I don’t understand,” I whisper.
“She saved my life. She’s the woman I saved from Nate that day at the bar.” He pauses and swallows hard. “It was self-defense. She made a decision knowing what the outcome could be. I don’t want you to be a part of this though. I have Tyler on his way to pick you up. I called him while I was looking for you. You’re going to leave with him and let us talk to the police.”
The blast of a 38-caliber revolver sends me crashing to my knees, landing in the road, with gravel digging deep into the flesh of my knees.
My hands grip the gritty ground, as if my life depends on it, making my fingers bleed. Who knows, at this point, maybe it does.
Even with my eyes closed, I can feel the world spinning around me, my body threatening to give up and lose what control I have left. Tears stream down my horror-stricken face and a silent scream is threatening to form in my throat. It hurts. It hurts like hell.
That’s when I hear it. A bloodcurdling scream that makes my blood run cold. Except, it’s not my screaming that is roaring through my ears as I expected.
It’s the screaming of a woman. A very angry, hysterical woman.
The only thing I can decipher is, “Call 911. Somebody f**king call 911. There’s blood everywhere.”
I can hear bodies shuffling nearby, some of them even tripping over me to get away, but I can only process one thought. He’s gone. Please don’t let him be gone.
With force, I am yanked to my feet, a large hand smacking me across the face, causing blood to taste on my tongue.
I try to focus, but my vision is too blurred to make any sense of who has control of my body and at this point, I’m not so sure it even matters.
“This is your fault,” the deep voice growls as I spit blood onto his filthy boots. Narrowing his eyes, he wraps my hair securely around his hand and yanks my head back, hard, while his other hand tightens around my throat, squeezing. “You’re going to pay for this if it’s the last thing I do, you stupid bitch.”
He lets go of my neck and shoves me down to the ground so that my face is pressed into the gravel, his boot crushing into the back of my skull. Dirt and rocks dig into my left eye, making it even harder to see through the tears. I desperately look for the man that hasn’t only crushed then stolen my heart just to crush it again, but has also replaced a part of me that I thought was long ago lost.
Realizing that my search is pointless, I just lay there defeated, feeling half-alive, but mostly dead. “Go ahead,” I whisper. “See if you can hurt me anymore than you already have. I dare you.” My body’s trembling, but I look him dead in the eye anyways. I’m not scared of dying. Not after losing the biggest part of me, my heart. “Losing him will be my last regret.” I shift so that I’m looking at the deep scars that cover his face. They make me sick. He makes me sick. “That and not killing you when I had the chance.”
I close my eyes waiting for his blow, but it doesn’t come. Instead, he is yanked from me and slammed down to the ground, beside me. Scrambling to get away, I crawl backwards with my hands and wipe at my eyes, trying to see what’s going on next to me.
My heart beats wild in my chest and a burst of happiness surges through me when I see it’s Kellan on top of the man, beating the crap out of him. He slams his fist into his face repeatedly while growling out words I can’t understand.
The man seems to look surprised, just lying there taking his beating, without struggle. Kellan grabs him by the hair and puts his face inches from his. “If I ever hear of you coming near my woman or my family again, I will f**king kill you. You will be dead . . . like Cape. My family is everything to me.”
Shoving the guy’s head into the ground, Kellan stands up and walks over to me. He drops to his knees in front of me and cups my face, desperately bringing his lips to mine. “I love you so f**kin’ much. I’m so sorry,” he cries. “I’m sorry for letting them hurt you. I couldn't let him do that to you. I can't bear to see another man rubbing his hands on you.” He rubs his bloodied hands over my hair, looking me in the eyes. “I promise if you can ever forgive me, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I will never leave again and I will make sure no one ever hurts you. I promise, baby I swear I didn't know it was a set up. I would have never left if I had. You have to believe me; I need you to believe me.”
I break out in tears, holding onto him as tight as I can. He’s alive. That’s all I can think about. I have no idea what happened in there, but he’s alive and in my arms. Just the thought of losing him made me dead inside; completely vacant of all feeling.
He pulls me closer into his arms and we both cry. He’s holding me as if he never wants to let go. I never want him to. I want him forever. He’s my life; my everything, but . . . I know I’m about to lose him. A man is dead because of him.
“Kellan,” I cry into his neck. “I thought you were dead.” I wrap my arm tighter around his neck and kiss him as if my life depends on it and it does, trust me it does. “I never want to lose you. I love you more than life. Don’t ever scare me again. Do you f**king hear me?” I look into his eyes, taking in his bruised and bloodied face, a sick feeling settling in my stomach. “We have to get you out of here. They’re going to come take you to jail. I can’t lose you; I won’t lose you again. We can run away together; leave the country, whatever it takes to keep us together.”
I know I’m being irrational and not thinking, but I can’t help it. I won’t lose him again. He means everything to me. I stand up and pull him to his feet. I try pulling him away, but he stops me.
He nods his head towards the door of the warehouse as the woman steps out the door and falls to her knees. Leaning in, he grabs my face and presses his lips next to my ear. “I didn’t shoot him, Phoenix.” He pulls away and looks at the woman crying on the ground. “It was Maxine.”
I throw my hands to my face as more tears stream out. I know I should feel relieved, but I’m sad for the woman and very confused. She was here with Cape, not Kellan. I was right when I thought she didn’t look as if she wanted to kiss him, but still, why would she shoot her own boyfriend? “I don’t understand,” I whisper.
“She saved my life. She’s the woman I saved from Nate that day at the bar.” He pauses and swallows hard. “It was self-defense. She made a decision knowing what the outcome could be. I don’t want you to be a part of this though. I have Tyler on his way to pick you up. I called him while I was looking for you. You’re going to leave with him and let us talk to the police.”
