Thoughtless

Page 24

Even worse though, was when he would ask me my opinion on one of Griffin's little stories. I would blush horribly and dart away as quickly as I could, without ever answering him. Evan would frown and tell him to be nice while Matt would chuckle quietly. Kellan and Griffin would laugh loudly, like it was the funniest thing they'd ever seen. Their laughter would follow me all the way up to the bar, where I actually looked forward to talking to Rita, instead of them.
All throughout my shift, he had made snide, suggestive comments. He watched me coldly and intently wherever I went. He flinched whenever I touched him - even accidentally. He made me so uncomfortable.
It made me a little sad, that one stupid mistake together had changed what had been a very nice friendship. I longed for the Kellan who chatted with me over coffee, who sweetly put his arms around me, who let me rest on his shoulder, who sat with me when I cried, who had tucked me into bed. And on the rare occurrences when I could look at our drunken night together, without the usual horrifying guilt, it was a pleasant memory, a fond memory even. It hurt me that Kellan obviously didn't feel the same. That in one night I had ruined everything between us.
Mostly though, it made me angry.
Frowning at the memories, stirring in my brain, I turned my head away from Denny on the couch so he wouldn't see my frustration. I could see now why Joey had fled. Kellan post-sex was kind of...no he was - an ass! I didn't have the luxury of simply skipping town though. Not when I had made such a big deal of Denny leaving, not when it would raise too many questions in Denny's eyes. I was starting to really dislike Kellan, and really miss him at the same time. I wished he would leave, that would greatly simplify things for me. That thought put an odd feeling in my stomach though.
Denny noticed my frown anyway. "You alright?"
I forced a smile and shrugged. "Yeah, just worried about you." I hated lying to him. Well, it really was only a half-lie; I was worried about him. I was just more preoccupied by Kellan's behavior. It bothered me that Kellan concerned me more.
Denny slipped an arm around me and held me close to his shoulder. He stopped sighing. He was always trying to please me...it only made me feel worse. My guilt increased ten-fold every time Denny smiled at me. He tenderly kissed my head and I looked up at him. He smiled sweetly and brought a hand to my cheek, running a finger down it. "It will be okay, Kiera." His tenderness expanded my heart, and broke it at the same time.
He leaned down and softly pressed his lips to mine. Sighing, he cupped my cheek with his hand, stroking me softly with his thumb, and kissed me deeper. I relaxed into his comfort, his warmth and tenderness, and returned his deep kiss. He ran his hands down to my hips and scooted me over to his lap. I smiled, and thought how much I liked him being home with me all morning, and that I had a good hour before school started...
I nestled into his lap and ran my fingers through his hair. He smiled at me between kisses. My breath was just beginning to increase when I heard the front door open. Kellan hadn't come home again last night; he hadn't spent a night here the past two nights. I wondered who he was dating and that thought irrationally irritated me. Whoever it was, he was just now getting back. I immediately froze and looked at the door. Kellan's eyes locked onto mine instantly. He smirked at me, his eyes suddenly mean. Then, as Denny turned to look over, his expression immediately softened. He smiled at Denny, although it did nothing to warm his eyes.
"Mornin'."
"You just gettin' home, mate?" Denny asked casually, his hands softly rubbing my thighs.
Kellan watched us for half a second then smiled again, looking only at Denny. "Yeah, I was..." he coolly glanced over at me, "...out."
Denny didn't notice the look. He simply shrugged and warmly looked back to me. I scooted off his lap and he laughed a little at me, slipping an arm around my waist. I sat in such a way, that I could see Denny and Kellan at the same time. It was odd to have both of them in my vision together; it did weird things to my stomach. Denny was still looking at me lovingly, Kellan was still watching us coolly, a slight frown on his face now. I wanted to crawl inside the couch and disappear.
Eventually, Kellan murmured something excusatory and wandered upstairs. I relaxed fractionally when I heard his door close. Denny raised an eyebrow suggestively at me and made a move like he was going to move me back on his lap, but I frowned at him. Laughing, he held me close to him until it was time for me to get ready for school.
Denny drove me to school and finally took a walk around the campus with me. I tried to be as good of a guide as Kellan had been. The memory of that day squeezed my heart painfully, as I quickly pointed out the various brick buildings on our way to my Psychology class. Denny, of course, wanted to talk about my Econ class and smiling as we walked hand in hand down the concrete pathways crisscrossing the expansive lawns, I relayed as much of it as I could in the short time we had.
We entered the building and Denny was just as impressed as I had been at the beauty of the school. It was truly remarkable, like stepping back to a time where art and the detailed, intricate beauty of architecture, not just practical form and function, were rampant. He opened the door to my Human Sexuality class and chuckling, said he wanted to hear all about it after school when he picked me up. Chuckling back, I leaned over and gave him a long kiss. Someone brushing past us in the door broke us apart, and I grudgingly said goodbye and went to my seat.
It was an odd class to have when my mind was so conflicted. The class had more to do with the psychological and social aspects of sexual behavior, than the mechanics of sex. The course went over cultural diversity, sexual health, abuse and assault. It still felt very relevant to my current situation however, and I had to force my mind away from analyzing my problems and back to what the professor was saying, on more than one occasion. I was a little relieved when the class was over.
I smiled at seeing Denny's old Honda in the parking lot in the same spot he had parked it before class. He climbed out of the driver's side and walked over to me, smiling widely.
"Hey," he said as he met up with me and then, with my favorite goofy grin on his face, he picked me up and spun me around. I laughed and laced my arms around his neck. He stopped spinning and setting me down, leaned in for a long, passionate kiss.
When I could catch my breath, I looked up at his sparkling eyes. "Someone's in a better mood."
He grinned and gave me a quick peck. "I got a phone call this afternoon...one of my contacts finally paid off." He stood up straight while I grinned back at him. "You are now looking at the newest member of SLS Advertising."
"Babe..." I gave him a warm hug and kissed his cheek. "That's great!" I pulled back to look him in the eye. "I knew you would find something, you are brilliant after all."
He sighed, looking at me lovingly. "So you keep telling me." He gazed at me for a moment longer. "I love you...so much. I'm so sorry..."
Guilt washed through me. I was an idiot and he was sorry? "Don't...it doesn't matter. Everything is back to normal now, back to how it should be." Well, nearly everything was back to normal. I smiled at him, my eyes suddenly too moist. "I love you too."
We kissed tenderly for another minute on the sidewalk, while people walked back and forth around us. We ignored them all, enjoying our moment of togetherness. Finally Denny pulled back, and smiling, took my hand and drove me back home.
Denny gave me a ride to work that night as well. I was not looking forward to the D-Bags performance this evening. I wasn't sure why, I just felt like Kellan's coldness towards me was going to somehow be projected on the stage for everyone to see. Denny kissed my cheek as I made my way to the backroom, to set down my bag and jacket. Jenny and Kate ran into me as I was coming back out.
Kate usually worked the morning shifts; I rarely saw her and hadn't really talked with her much. She was an averagely pretty girl. Long, light brown hair pulled back into a perfect ponytail. Eyes so light brown they were almost ocher, with the longest, fullest lashes I had ever seen. She was tall and a little too thin, but extremely graceful, like she had belonged to a ballet troupe before joining the staff here at Pete's.
"Hi, Kiera!" Jenny said as she gave me a swift hug. "Kate's switching to nights, since we were slammed last Friday. The guys are really pulling the people in, now that school's going again."
I smiled politely at Kate and returned Jenny's hug. "Yeah... I guess they are." Thinking back on last Friday, it had been pretty busy. I barely had had time that night to notice the band. I had still noticed Kellan though. My eyes had watched him whenever there had been a pause with the customers. So much had changed since then. Our relationship had changed so much since last weekend. I wasn't sure what to expect tonight.
The beginning of the evening went pleasantly enough. It helped having an extra waitress there. I got to spend more time flirting with Denny, who decided to stay for dinner and the show. I brought him his food and gave him a kiss. I brought him his soda and gave him a kiss. Heck, I brought him extra napkins and gave him a kiss. Jenny smiled at our cuteness. I was just glad to have him back.
But eventually, and with much fanfare, the front doors burst open and Griffin walked through, with his arms outstretched like a King entering his throne room. The fans already at the bar, of course went nuts, and made their way over to him. He put his arms around a couple of them and headed over to his usual table, stopping on the way to steal a kiss from Kate, who quickly pushed him away, sighing and rolling her eyes. Apparently, she was used to Griffin's advances.
Matt and Evan came in much more quietly behind Griffin. Matt smiled politely and followed Griffin to their table. Evan gave Jenny a big hug and wrapped an arm around an eager girl who had kissed his cheek, then followed Matt.
My stomach clenched as I discretely watched the door, knowing who would be coming through it next. Seconds later he appeared, and my breath caught. He was stunning. His wavy hair was perfect. His long sleeve shirt, layered under a basic, black t-shirt, emphasized his spectacular chest. His jeans, faded and frayed from years of use, clung to him enticingly. His lips were slightly curled in a sexy half-smile and his deep blue, piercing eyes were locked onto mine.
Knowing Denny was here and he could be watching me, I forced my breath back and turned my eyes away. I turned to Denny, but he was clasping hands with Matt and chatting with the other guys at their table. My eyes swung back over to Kellan, who was still watching me, and was now walking over to me, an odd look in his eyes. I debated turning and leaving, but he was in my section, I was his waitress. It would look odd if I didn't help him. I hoped he would be normal to me tonight, not his now-usual cold, jerky self.
He came right up to me. "Kiera," he said calmly.
I swallowed and made myself look him in the eye. "Yes, Kellan?"
He smiled and cocked his head to the side. "We'll have the usual." He nodded his head over to the table. "Bring one for Denny too...since he's a part of this."
The odd way he phrased it made me frown, but I nodded, and he turned and walked to the table with the guys. Nearly instantly, two girls were attached to his arms, running fingers through his perfectly sexy hair. I swallowed and made myself go up to the bar and get their drinks.
Rita winked conspiratorially at me when I got everyone's beers. She seemed to think she knew something. Of course, she thought I was jumping into bed with Kellan from the very beginning. I sighed and ignored her as I grabbed the band's drinks.
Business picked up dramatically after the guys showed up, and I no longer had time to flirt with Denny. Honestly, with Kellan there I wouldn't have felt comfortable flirting with him anyway, especially not with them all sitting at the same table together. I did notice that Kellan sat on the opposite end of the table from Denny, facing out into the crowd, flirting with some girls at the next table, not even once looking at Denny. I wasn't sure what Kellan's problem was with him...guilt maybe?
Eventually it was time for them to go onstage. The crowd, as typical mostly women, went nuts and crowded the front of the stage. I watched from the tables as they started their set. They were perfect, of course. The songs were catchy, Kellan's voice was sexy, the looks he threw the crowd were downright indecent, and it wasn't long before the whole back half of the bar was dancing and carrying-on, thoroughly enjoying their entertainment. I stopped watching Kellan and his...act...and turned back to the customers still seated.