Three Little Words

Page 36

Denise hugged her. “I’m sorry my son is an idiot.”
“Me, too.”
“None of this would have happened if the three of you hadn’t bugged him about getting married,” Nevada muttered. “Now Isabel’s hurt and Ford is gone.”
Isabel turned to Consuelo. “He’s gone?”
Her friend shifted on the sofa. “Not permanently. He took a couple of days off. He said he needed to clear his head.” Consuelo looked at her. “He’ll be back.”
“Ford is unlikely to walk away from the business,” Felicia offered. “He enjoys his work. He’s settled into the town. I’m surprised he would leave you. From the empirical evidence, I would think he was very fond of you.” She paused. “Am I not helping?”
Isabel started to laugh. “You’re helping a lot. All of you.”
She had this, she reminded herself. Her friends, who loved her. Family, a business she was excited about. As for Ford, she would get over him. Eventually.
* * *
THE CABIN BY LAKE TAHOE had enough of the basics to be comfortable. Most of the time there was electricity. The large open room contained two sets of extra-long bunk beds, a table and chairs, most of a kitchen and a big sofa. There was a wide front porch with chairs and a view of the lake. The area was beautiful, quiet and isolated. Ford cared only about the last two, but the view was nice when he bothered to look.
He owned the cabin with several buddies. They came up here when they needed to get away. When life was too stressful or after one of those missions that came with ghosts. But even after three days, he couldn’t seem to find what he was looking for.
Whoever he’d been was gone. Isabel had changed him, and he couldn’t go back to who he’d been. He also didn’t know how to move forward, which left him in a hell of a pickle.
He knew he missed her. Missed her more than he’d thought possible. More than he’d ever missed anyone. He needed her to breathe, and right now he was a man gasping for air.
But... Always but. How could he be with her? She deserved so much more than he had to offer. She needed someone to love her and cherish her. He wanted to say he could do it, but he’d never really loved anyone. Never wanted to stay. When the woman got serious, he got gone. His current location illustrated his inability to break the pattern.
He heard the sound of a truck in the distance. The intrusion wasn’t completely unexpected. He’d known someone would come looking for him. He rose and stretched, then walked down the two steps leading to the gravel driveway and rounded the corner.
Only the guy getting out of the truck wasn’t Angel or Gideon. It wasn’t even Justice. Instead Leonard stood by the truck, a small suitcase in one hand.
Unexpected, Ford thought, returning to the cabin. He pulled a second beer out of the refrigerator and took it out to Leonard. Then he sat in his chair and propped his feet up on the railing.
The lake was the deepest blue he’d ever seen. The leaves had all changed and nearly half were gone. Winter was coming. Not this week, but soon.
Leonard dumped his suitcase in the cabin, then took the seat next to Ford’s. He picked up the beer and twisted off the cap, then took a seat.
“You ready to talk?” Leonard asked.
“Nope.”
By the next afternoon, Leonard was obviously frustrated enough to spit nails. Ford was impressed he’d lasted as long as he had. Just sitting. When it had gotten dark, the two men had gone inside, and Ford had grilled a couple of steaks he’d bought at a store off the main highway. They’d eaten in silence, then listened to the radio before going to bed.
But now Leonard was squirming in his seat.
“I’m not going to just sit here,” he said, glaring at Ford. “I have a family to get home to.”
Ford nodded toward the driveway. “I’m not keeping you.”
“I’m not leaving without you.”
Ford settled more deeply into his chair. “Then you have a problem.”
Leonard got up. He’d put on a little muscle, but was still scrawny. Still, he was a good man, and Ford appreciated the effort.
“I’m fine,” he said. “You don’t have to worry about me.”
Leonard pushed up his glasses and glared at him. “I’m not here about you. I’m here because of Isabel.”
Ford did his best not to wince at the name. Hearing it made him think about her, which made him ache. Not that he’d been able to forget her for even a second, but still.
“You’re walking away from the best thing that ever happened to you,” Leonard told him. “Being a part of something important—a family—is what life’s about. You could marry her, be a father. Why would you ever want to turn away from that?”
Ford studied the man. Leonard was telling the truth as he knew it. For him, Maeve and the kids were everything. Ford respected that, even if he would never have it for himself.
“You have a real chance with Isabel,” Leonard continued. “But it’s not just her I’m worried about. Maeve isn’t happy.” Leonard puffed out his chest. “I’m willing to do anything to make Maeve happy.”
Ford straightened in his seat. He believed Leonard. Love gave a man courage where he didn’t have a right to any. Leonard would take him on because it was the right thing to do.
“You’re a better man than I’ll ever be,” he said, rising. “But I’m not going back.”
“Why not?”
“I’m not like you. You’re right. What I have with Isabel is more than I deserve. She’s my fantasy come to life. She’s adorable and funny and sweet, but I don’t love her. I can’t. I’ve never been in love with anyone. I just don’t have whatever it takes to have those feelings.”
“That is such crap.” Leonard’s expression turned pitying. “Seriously? Is that the best you can do?”
“It’s true.”
“It’s not true. You’re capable of love and a whole lot more. You’re not emotionally stunted. Look at your loyalty to your team. You would have died for them.”
“Yeah, but that was different.”
“Not the principle. What about with your mother? You were willing to do anything not to have to hurt her feelings. You love her. You love your family.”
“You’re not getting it. How you love a woman is different than how you love a family.”
“No, it’s not. The sex is different, but the love is the same. It’s giving of yourself, wanting them to be happy. It’s doing the right thing and showing up every day. If you can love one person, you can love Isabel.”
Ford wanted to believe him. If only it were that easy. “I haven’t had a serious relationship since Maeve,” he admitted. “There have been plenty of women, but I haven’t wanted to be with any of them more than a few days, maybe a couple of weeks. They tried to convince me, but I wouldn’t have it. I walked away every time.”
Leonard patted him on the shoulder. “That’s because you were falling for someone else. The letters. Isabel’s letters. You couldn’t fall for those women because you were already in love with Isabel. All this time, she’s been the one. You came home for her. That’s why you picked her to have a fake relationship with. You figured it was the closest you could come to the real thing, and you wanted that with her. It’s been Isabel the whole time.”
Ford’s first instinct was to crush Leonard like a bug. His second was to take a deep breath and figure out if he could be telling the truth.
Was it really that simple?
* * *
ISABEL FINISHED CLEANING the kitchen. Sadly, that was what her Sunday afternoon had been reduced to. She knew she could call one of her friends and go do something, but she wasn’t in the mood for company.
The party Friday night had helped a lot. The hangover had been a distraction, too, but mostly she’d been reminded of the love and support she had in town.
She started the dishwasher, then sat down at the kitchen table with a pad of paper. Now that she was staying, she needed to make a list of all the things she had to do. For one thing, her parents were due back in a few weeks. She adored them but seriously wanted her own place. She’d already mentioned taking over the store during their last conversation and they’d been thrilled. Which meant she needed to move forward with getting an estimate on what the renovations would cost.
There was a meeting with a lawyer to draw up partnership papers with Taryn and contracting with all her designers. Maybe even find a few new ones. A thousand things to keep her busy. Unfortunately, none of them kept her from missing Ford.
“Hello, Isabel.”
She jumped in the chair, then sprang to her feet. Ford stood in the living room, unshaven, slightly mussed and as gorgeous as ever.
“I know I locked the door,” she said. It was something she’d started doing yesterday.
He shrugged. “Locks aren’t a real problem with me. I need to show you something.”
He walked down the hall and into her bedroom. Once there, he pulled open his duffel and withdrew the letters.
She paused in the doorway, not sure why he’d shown up but determined not to let him know how much he’d hurt her. She would be fine, she told herself. She would get through this, and eventually she would heal.
He flipped through the letters, then held up one. “I got this the day a buddy of mine was killed. I was right next to him when it happened. If the bullet had gone ten inches to the left, I would have been the one who died.”
He tossed that envelope on the bed and picked up another one. “Three nights in a frozen shit hole with no food or water. You’d discovered Billy and surfing, and reading your letter took me away to L.A. and something good.”
He fanned out the letters, then dropped them all onto the bed. “The reason I don’t talk about what happened is I already did. To you. You were there with me, every step of the way. You kept me company when I was lonely. You reminded me what I was fighting for, and in the end, you brought me home.”
She didn’t know what to think, what to say.
“I watched you grow up, Isabel,” he continued. “I know you better than I know anyone. It took your skinny accountant brother-in-law to get me to see the truth, but the reason I’ve never fallen in love with anyone before now is that I’ve always been in love with you. I don’t know if it happened with the first letter, or the second, but I can tell you by the time you kicked Warren in the balls after the prom, I was yours. I was just too stupid to figure it out for myself.”
He shrugged. “If you’re still in love with me, I’d like that a lot, because I’m sure in love with you.”
She didn’t remember moving, but suddenly she was in his arms. He held her so tight, she didn’t think she could breathe, but that was okay. She had Ford and he loved her.
She started to laugh, and laughter turned to tears; then he was kissing her, and she was kissing him back.
“I do love you,” he murmured, his lips moving against hers.
“I love you, too.”
He cupped her face and stared into her eyes. “We can stay here, if you want, but if you need to be in New York, I’ll go with you.”
She pressed her hands against his broad chest. “No. I want to be in Fool’s Gold.” She sniffed, then smiled. “By the way, your mom says she knew we were faking it all along.”
“No way.”
“That’s what she told me.”
He grinned and kissed her again. “But that’s the thing. I wasn’t faking after all. Isabel, marry me?”
She felt happy enough to float. “Yes.”
He pointed to the letters. “After all this, I’m going to have to write all of our vows myself.”
She smiled. “I think you’re up to the challenge.”
“I’m up for anything, as long as I’m with you.”