Unconditional
Page 35
She moved to his windows and looked out over evening in Portland. Wet from rain, the lights glittering, the asphalt dark and slick. He joined her, but didn’t get so close she couldn’t think.
“So I had this career. And I love being a cop. I’d want to do that here too. Something along those lines. It’s part of who I am. I like protecting people. Which I suppose is what you do too, which is pretty cool. Anyway. I am not ashamed of being a witch, but even though I’ve known it forever and have had contact with other witches pretty much my whole life, I have not really lived as a witch. I think you know more about it than I do.”
She wanted to give him the words because he’d been so good to her.
“When I first heard you say I was your mate, I was so angry. I felt rejected.” She turned to him, putting her fingers over his lips and then pulled away because every time she touched him she wanted him and she needed to get all this out. “I get it now. I understand, and I’m so grateful you gave me this space even though I’m sure it’s been hard. But you did it for me and that means something.
“I’ve been alone for a long time. I’ve had Allie and she’s important to me. She’s my best friend. The only other person I know, before you came back into my life anyway, who shared this secret, who I really could talk to and share with. I never allowed myself to imagine what it would be like to have someone like you. To have something like a mate bond.”
She wiped away her tears, and he took her hand, kissing her fingertips.
“I have been so lonely, and you, this world has filled me up in ways I’ve never thought possible. Suddenly my future is full of so much energy and magick and connection, and I’m thrilled and excited.”
He moved to a box of tissues and brought them to her.
“It’s immense. There’s so much I need to process. And I can’t until I find Allie. I’m not rejecting you, but I want to celebrate this thing between us. I want to know more before I do it, and I just can’t put that sort of energy into it right now. Do you understand?”
He nodded and kissed her cheeks, so gently that it made her tear up again.
“I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. Take the time you need. I’ve already told you I’ll answer all your questions. Thank you for sharing all that with me. It breaks my heart that you’ve been so alone and that I contributed to that when I left.”
She shook her head and smiled. “I’ve forgiven that. You’ve apologized but I get it. I understand why it had to happen, and to be honest with you, I think it was part of the whole big plan anyway. That you and I had our path to walk, had experiences we needed to go through and get past so we could come back together later on and truly appreciate what we had.”
“I like that. Tracy said something similar to me. They know. You should hear that from me too. Esme, the female from today…”
She growled. “Her.”
He hid a grin but she saw it anyway. “Anyway, wolves are notorious gossips. Once members of the pack see us together, they’re going to know. It’s all right. We have our own timeline and no one else has a say over it. But I didn’t want you going into some event without knowing that.”
“I need a soak in some Epsom salts before you get what that look on your face is asking for.”
He burst out laughing and sobered quickly. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”
“I’m gonna guess it’s like anything else. Lots of practice will make me more, um, used to such activity.”
He pulled her into a hug, and she held on, her ear pressed to his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.
“I do actually have some Epsom salts. Like I said, we heal fast but not instantly.”
“I hate that your job is dangerous.”
“Ditto, gorgeous. But it’s who we are.”
“All right. I’m going to make some calls. Just to check in with Pam and this Cesare guy that Gage spoke of. Then I’m going to take a bath and then you can pleasure me.”
He snorted. “I’ll run you a bath. I have some calls of my own to handle. Some folks from National will be in town next week, and I want to be sure everything is in place.”
“I’d have a choice, right? In who the anchor was? Is. Whatever.”
“Of course. I mean there are some limits. It has to be a single male who isn’t already an anchor, and it has to be someone of my rank or higher. That limits the pool a little. I’m second. It would have to be an Enforcer or something like that, or an Alpha.”
She nodded. “All right. As for your work? I’ve told you, do your job. I’m going to feel bad if you’re here instead of doing your work.”
“I have all the stuff I need on my computer. I’m connected remotely to our work servers. It’s not anything I can’t do from here. Damon is handling all the stuff that is pressing at work. By the way, it seems like you and Gina are getting on. She’s sort of scary.”
“I like her. And Rhonda. I think I can make a life in Portland. With you. And with the witches here. It’s nice that she understands the situation that I’ll be in as a witch with a Were mate. She’s funny and open and I enjoy her. And yes, she’s definitely scary.”
He went off to start the bath and she checked in. Nothing new with Pam, though the police were on alert after the murder that day. Stricter security protocols in place had slowed everything down, but that was to be expected. Anything Charlie could have told them was now gone. Though certainly he must have known something or they wouldn’t have killed him.
“So I had this career. And I love being a cop. I’d want to do that here too. Something along those lines. It’s part of who I am. I like protecting people. Which I suppose is what you do too, which is pretty cool. Anyway. I am not ashamed of being a witch, but even though I’ve known it forever and have had contact with other witches pretty much my whole life, I have not really lived as a witch. I think you know more about it than I do.”
She wanted to give him the words because he’d been so good to her.
“When I first heard you say I was your mate, I was so angry. I felt rejected.” She turned to him, putting her fingers over his lips and then pulled away because every time she touched him she wanted him and she needed to get all this out. “I get it now. I understand, and I’m so grateful you gave me this space even though I’m sure it’s been hard. But you did it for me and that means something.
“I’ve been alone for a long time. I’ve had Allie and she’s important to me. She’s my best friend. The only other person I know, before you came back into my life anyway, who shared this secret, who I really could talk to and share with. I never allowed myself to imagine what it would be like to have someone like you. To have something like a mate bond.”
She wiped away her tears, and he took her hand, kissing her fingertips.
“I have been so lonely, and you, this world has filled me up in ways I’ve never thought possible. Suddenly my future is full of so much energy and magick and connection, and I’m thrilled and excited.”
He moved to a box of tissues and brought them to her.
“It’s immense. There’s so much I need to process. And I can’t until I find Allie. I’m not rejecting you, but I want to celebrate this thing between us. I want to know more before I do it, and I just can’t put that sort of energy into it right now. Do you understand?”
He nodded and kissed her cheeks, so gently that it made her tear up again.
“I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. Take the time you need. I’ve already told you I’ll answer all your questions. Thank you for sharing all that with me. It breaks my heart that you’ve been so alone and that I contributed to that when I left.”
She shook her head and smiled. “I’ve forgiven that. You’ve apologized but I get it. I understand why it had to happen, and to be honest with you, I think it was part of the whole big plan anyway. That you and I had our path to walk, had experiences we needed to go through and get past so we could come back together later on and truly appreciate what we had.”
“I like that. Tracy said something similar to me. They know. You should hear that from me too. Esme, the female from today…”
She growled. “Her.”
He hid a grin but she saw it anyway. “Anyway, wolves are notorious gossips. Once members of the pack see us together, they’re going to know. It’s all right. We have our own timeline and no one else has a say over it. But I didn’t want you going into some event without knowing that.”
“I need a soak in some Epsom salts before you get what that look on your face is asking for.”
He burst out laughing and sobered quickly. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”
“I’m gonna guess it’s like anything else. Lots of practice will make me more, um, used to such activity.”
He pulled her into a hug, and she held on, her ear pressed to his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.
“I do actually have some Epsom salts. Like I said, we heal fast but not instantly.”
“I hate that your job is dangerous.”
“Ditto, gorgeous. But it’s who we are.”
“All right. I’m going to make some calls. Just to check in with Pam and this Cesare guy that Gage spoke of. Then I’m going to take a bath and then you can pleasure me.”
He snorted. “I’ll run you a bath. I have some calls of my own to handle. Some folks from National will be in town next week, and I want to be sure everything is in place.”
“I’d have a choice, right? In who the anchor was? Is. Whatever.”
“Of course. I mean there are some limits. It has to be a single male who isn’t already an anchor, and it has to be someone of my rank or higher. That limits the pool a little. I’m second. It would have to be an Enforcer or something like that, or an Alpha.”
She nodded. “All right. As for your work? I’ve told you, do your job. I’m going to feel bad if you’re here instead of doing your work.”
“I have all the stuff I need on my computer. I’m connected remotely to our work servers. It’s not anything I can’t do from here. Damon is handling all the stuff that is pressing at work. By the way, it seems like you and Gina are getting on. She’s sort of scary.”
“I like her. And Rhonda. I think I can make a life in Portland. With you. And with the witches here. It’s nice that she understands the situation that I’ll be in as a witch with a Were mate. She’s funny and open and I enjoy her. And yes, she’s definitely scary.”
He went off to start the bath and she checked in. Nothing new with Pam, though the police were on alert after the murder that day. Stricter security protocols in place had slowed everything down, but that was to be expected. Anything Charlie could have told them was now gone. Though certainly he must have known something or they wouldn’t have killed him.
