Undead and Unreturnable

Chapter 12

I had my ear jammed so tightly against the door between the parlor and the hall, I probably had splinters in my cochlea. (It was weird how things like my tenth-grade biology report on the inner ear stayed with me for, like, ever.)
"Thanks again for coming over," Jessica said, sounding resigned. I figure I knew why. Nick was about to hit her up for a contribution to the Policeman's Ball, or whatever. I felt bad-Nick's devotion to me was a little on the obvious side-but what could I do? What could she do?
"I was really glad to see you were up this late, too," Nick said. "I've been meaning to talk to you for a couple of weeks, but things-you know. Work."
"Sure," Jess said. "What can I do for you?"
"Well, the captain mentioned he saw you at the new Walker exhibit, and I know you're into that stuff. I don't know if you heard, but-you probably heard-there's a new Matthew Barney exhibit opening this weekend, and I was wondering if you'd want to go.
That'd be really mmm hmmm hmmm bmmm.
"Quite rude," Sinclair commented.
"Shhhh!"
"Bmmm mmm hmmm mmm?" Shit! They were walking through the house. There were about eight doors between me and the front door.
"Darling, whatever it is, she'll tell you about it the second she returns."
"Yeah, yeah." I turned. Sinclair was in my personal bubble, as usual, looking amused, also as usual. "I was just curious, that's all."
"Nosy."
"Probing," I insisted. "Like a reporter."
He put his hands on my shoulders and picked me up for a smooch. My feet were dangling a good six inches off the floor as I kissed him back, more a distracted peck because I was wondering what the other two were talking about. He nuzzled into the base of my throat but didn't bite, which is about as loving a gesture a vampire can make.
I guess that sounds romantic and all, and it kind of was, but it was hard to just, you know, dangle there. So I oomphed and umphed and climbed him until my ankles were crossed behind his back and my arms were looped around his neck.
"How delightful," he said. "This is bringing something more interesting than current events to mind."
"Perv. Can you believe Nick just stopping by like that?"
Sinclair's mouth went thin. "Yes."
"Wasn't that nice?"
"Yes. Nice."
"Oh, take it easy. Threatened much? Dude, take a break, go look in the mirror, and then relax, okay?"
"I didn't win you only to have you be distracted by some living meat with a shiny badge."
I gaped at him. Okay, I knew Sinclair generally felt vampires were superior to regular guys, but... living meat with a shiny badge?
"You didn't exactly win me," was the best I could come up with. "I'm not a Lotto ticket."
At my expression, he added, "You know you're attracted to shiny things. If you were a raven, you'd snatch that badge and go put it in your nest."
"Wh-uh-" Okay. One thing at a time. "Okay, listen, the reason I was trying to hear is, I just-Jessica said the dumbest thing on the way here. How sometimes she felt invisible next to me."
"Who said what?"
"Very funny. Don't you think that's dumb? I thought that was dumb."
"Dumb," he agreed.
I tried to kick him, but my feet were, of course, behind him. "This is serious! A) it's so not true, and b) it's terrible that she thinks that. But I think I know why she's got such a silly idea in her head."
"Because you're the eternally young, beautiful vampire queen no man can resist?"
"No!" Aw. But no. "She hasn't gone on a date in forever; she hasn't had a steady boyfriend since-jeez, when did she break up with dave?"
"Elizabeth."
I rested my chin on his shoulder and thought. "Was it before or after my dad threw the Ant the anniversary party at Windows? Because he-dave-came with her for that, but was that their 'we really can just be friends' date? Or were they really still living together then?"
"dave?"
"Yeah, after they broke up we decided he didn't deserve to have a capital letter in his name. Anyway, I need to fix her up. Trouble is, I'm running around with gay guys and vampires."
"That is a problem."
"Ha! So you agree vampires make rotten dates."
"That is a subject for another time. However, I think this could be very, very good for us."
"What?" I felt his forehead. "Are you all right? Because it almost seems like you're not following this at all."
"So we, and by we I do mean you, dearest, need to be supportive."
"What?"
I heard rapidly approaching footsteps, and Sinclair set me down. So things looked relatively innocent when Jessica burst into the room and yelled, "Nick asked me out!"
Then, the scowl. "I know you bums were talking about me."