Unexpected Rush
Page 87
He inhaled, then let it out. “I just need five minutes.”
Alyssa opened her mouth as if she had a very definite opinion about him needing five minutes, but then she just shrugged. “I’ll ask her.”
She shut the door in his face.
He waited, pacing the small front porch until the door opened again. This time, it was Harmony.
“What?”
Wow, she was really mad. He deserved it.
“I’m sorry. Can I come in?”
“No.”
He raked his fingers through his hair. “Harmony, I don’t want to do this on the porch. Please.”
She sighed. “Fine.”
She opened the door and he stepped in. Alyssa stood just behind Harmony, arms folded like a warrior bodyguard.
“Alyssa,” Barrett said. “Can we have a minute, please?”
Alyssa looked over at Harmony, who gave her friend a short nod.
“I’ll be upstairs. You holler if you need me.”
Alyssa gave him a look that told him not to upset her best friend, then went upstairs.
“Can we sit down?” Barrett asked.
“I’d rather stand. Plus, you’re not staying long.”
Okay, so it was going to be like that.
“I’m sorry. I picked the wrong time and place to talk to Drake.”
“You think? You knew he wasn’t going to react well, and to do it in front of my mother?”
“I know. I need to have a conversation with your mother—to apologize to her.”
“No, I’ll have a conversation with my mother. I think you’ve done enough.”
“Fine. Then I’ll talk to Drake.”
“Right. Because that went so well the first time.”
He threw up his hands. “What do you want me to do, Harmony?”
“I don’t want you to do anything. No, what I want you to do is turn back the clock, man up and tell my brother we were together when we were first together, like you should have.”
“You know that wasn’t the right time.”
“Why wasn’t it the right time? Because you just wanted to fuck me then, and if it didn’t work out, then your friendship with Drake wouldn’t have been tested? What about me, Barrett? What about my feelings? You’ve been hiding me away like some ugly secret for months now, and I’ve gone along with it because I thought you and I might have something worth working toward. But you know what? I’m done with that. And I’m done with you.”
Cold dread settled in the pit of his stomach. “You don’t mean that. And I told you before I never thought you were an ugly secret. We agreed—”
“We never agreed. I reluctantly settled because that was the way you wanted it. But no more. If you’d cared about me, if you’d respected me, none of this would have happened. I’m done.”
He reached out for her. “Harmony, there are things I need to tell you.”
She held out her hand. “I don’t want to hear anything else you have to say. Please leave.”
He heard the finality in her voice. The tremble and the hurt. He hated to have been the one to put that pain there. And by the words she said, it sounded a lot like “this is over.”
He wanted to say the words, to convince her he loved her, but she looked so hurt, her arms wrapped protectively around herself, that he knew anything he said right now would roll right over her.
She wouldn’t believe him. She wouldn’t hear him.
In a lot of ways, she was just as stubborn as her brother, especially when her back was up.
Now wasn’t the time for a declaration of love. First he had to fix the damage he’d caused.
He turned and walked out the door, feeling like the absolute asshole that he was.
He had to find a way to make this right.
Thirty-Six
Harmony had spent the past two days feeling absolutely miserable. She’d held on to the anger all day Friday, which had gotten her through the workday in one piece.
By Friday night, the anger had dissolved and the hurt had wedged its way in, followed by miserable tears.
She hated crying over Barrett. He so wasn’t worth it.
But he was. She loved him. She didn’t want to love him, but she did.
She also highly disliked him at the moment.
Along with her brother.
Deciding not to think about the male gender at all, she’d brought paperwork home and was buried in spreadsheets and pretty designs when her doorbell rang. She knew it wasn’t Alyssa, because although her best friend wanted to camp out with her and hold her hand through this, Alyssa had to work today and Harmony had refused to let Alyssa take the day off to hold her hand.
She didn’t need handholding. She could get through this.
She went to the door, surprised to see her mother there. She’d talked to her mom on the phone and assured her she was fine.
“Mama. What are you doing here?”
“I came to see my baby girl. Is that all right?”
“Of course it is. Come on in.” She hugged her mother and brought her into the living room.
“Do you want some iced tea?”
“I’d love some.”
Harmony fixed two glasses of iced tea, then sat on the sofa next to Mama.
“Now,” her mother said. “Since you’ve been avoiding me with all that ‘I’m okay’ nonsense, why don’t you tell me how you really feel?”
She sighed. Mothers really did know best. “I’m miserable. I miss Barrett, even though I’m so angry with him.”
Alyssa opened her mouth as if she had a very definite opinion about him needing five minutes, but then she just shrugged. “I’ll ask her.”
She shut the door in his face.
He waited, pacing the small front porch until the door opened again. This time, it was Harmony.
“What?”
Wow, she was really mad. He deserved it.
“I’m sorry. Can I come in?”
“No.”
He raked his fingers through his hair. “Harmony, I don’t want to do this on the porch. Please.”
She sighed. “Fine.”
She opened the door and he stepped in. Alyssa stood just behind Harmony, arms folded like a warrior bodyguard.
“Alyssa,” Barrett said. “Can we have a minute, please?”
Alyssa looked over at Harmony, who gave her friend a short nod.
“I’ll be upstairs. You holler if you need me.”
Alyssa gave him a look that told him not to upset her best friend, then went upstairs.
“Can we sit down?” Barrett asked.
“I’d rather stand. Plus, you’re not staying long.”
Okay, so it was going to be like that.
“I’m sorry. I picked the wrong time and place to talk to Drake.”
“You think? You knew he wasn’t going to react well, and to do it in front of my mother?”
“I know. I need to have a conversation with your mother—to apologize to her.”
“No, I’ll have a conversation with my mother. I think you’ve done enough.”
“Fine. Then I’ll talk to Drake.”
“Right. Because that went so well the first time.”
He threw up his hands. “What do you want me to do, Harmony?”
“I don’t want you to do anything. No, what I want you to do is turn back the clock, man up and tell my brother we were together when we were first together, like you should have.”
“You know that wasn’t the right time.”
“Why wasn’t it the right time? Because you just wanted to fuck me then, and if it didn’t work out, then your friendship with Drake wouldn’t have been tested? What about me, Barrett? What about my feelings? You’ve been hiding me away like some ugly secret for months now, and I’ve gone along with it because I thought you and I might have something worth working toward. But you know what? I’m done with that. And I’m done with you.”
Cold dread settled in the pit of his stomach. “You don’t mean that. And I told you before I never thought you were an ugly secret. We agreed—”
“We never agreed. I reluctantly settled because that was the way you wanted it. But no more. If you’d cared about me, if you’d respected me, none of this would have happened. I’m done.”
He reached out for her. “Harmony, there are things I need to tell you.”
She held out her hand. “I don’t want to hear anything else you have to say. Please leave.”
He heard the finality in her voice. The tremble and the hurt. He hated to have been the one to put that pain there. And by the words she said, it sounded a lot like “this is over.”
He wanted to say the words, to convince her he loved her, but she looked so hurt, her arms wrapped protectively around herself, that he knew anything he said right now would roll right over her.
She wouldn’t believe him. She wouldn’t hear him.
In a lot of ways, she was just as stubborn as her brother, especially when her back was up.
Now wasn’t the time for a declaration of love. First he had to fix the damage he’d caused.
He turned and walked out the door, feeling like the absolute asshole that he was.
He had to find a way to make this right.
Thirty-Six
Harmony had spent the past two days feeling absolutely miserable. She’d held on to the anger all day Friday, which had gotten her through the workday in one piece.
By Friday night, the anger had dissolved and the hurt had wedged its way in, followed by miserable tears.
She hated crying over Barrett. He so wasn’t worth it.
But he was. She loved him. She didn’t want to love him, but she did.
She also highly disliked him at the moment.
Along with her brother.
Deciding not to think about the male gender at all, she’d brought paperwork home and was buried in spreadsheets and pretty designs when her doorbell rang. She knew it wasn’t Alyssa, because although her best friend wanted to camp out with her and hold her hand through this, Alyssa had to work today and Harmony had refused to let Alyssa take the day off to hold her hand.
She didn’t need handholding. She could get through this.
She went to the door, surprised to see her mother there. She’d talked to her mom on the phone and assured her she was fine.
“Mama. What are you doing here?”
“I came to see my baby girl. Is that all right?”
“Of course it is. Come on in.” She hugged her mother and brought her into the living room.
“Do you want some iced tea?”
“I’d love some.”
Harmony fixed two glasses of iced tea, then sat on the sofa next to Mama.
“Now,” her mother said. “Since you’ve been avoiding me with all that ‘I’m okay’ nonsense, why don’t you tell me how you really feel?”
She sighed. Mothers really did know best. “I’m miserable. I miss Barrett, even though I’m so angry with him.”
