Unsuitable
Page 67
I’m twisting my hands in my lap. I lick my dry lips and take a fortifying breath.
“I…care about you.” I’m falling for you. “And I wanted you to know that.” And, clearly, I’m too chickenshit to tell you that I’m falling for you. “And I know I broke your trust, prying into your life like I did, and I am beyond sorry for that. And I just wanted you to know how much you mean to me…and that I want to be with you…more than anything.”
He’s not speaking. He’s just staring at me, expressionless.
And my heart sinks. “Okay…well, I guess I should go.” I shoot to my feet and start walking quickly to the door.
“Wait.”
Stupid hope makes my heart pause.
I turn back to him. He’s standing now.
“I don’t want you to go,” he whispers.
“You don’t?”
“No.”
My body trembles as I watch him slowly walk toward me.
My heart is trying its best to climb out of my throat.
I nervously swallow down.
Kas stops in front of me and cups my face in his hands.
His scent surrounds me. His breath blowing gently on my skin.
“Daisy…I haven’t felt anything for a long time. I was dead inside. I guess, to a large degree, I still am. But that moment you came into my life, it was like…taking a breath for the first time in seven years.” He presses his forehead to mine, closing his eyes. “I didn’t want to feel anything for you, so I fought my feelings and pushed you away, but all the pushing and fighting didn’t change the fact that I wanted you more than I’d ever wanted anyone.” Looking at me, he inhales softly. “I…I care about you, too. I don’t want to lose you.”
“I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”
I press my hands to his chest, and he inhales sharply. Almost like my touch has burned him. And I know how he feels because my whole body is burning for him.
“It’s selfish, and I know I don’t deserve you…but I want you so fucking much.”
“Kas…” I whisper, closing my eyes. “I want you, too. So much.”
He takes a shallow breath. I feel his face leave mine.
I blink open my eyes and stare up at him. The look in his eyes causes me to pause. My pulse starts to thrum.
“There’s something you need to know.”
“Okay…” I say, my voice betraying my nerves.
“Daisy, after what happened that night…I wasn’t able to…” His eyes slide away from mine. Looking past me, he takes a deep breath. “I haven’t been with a woman in over seven years.”
Oh. Wow.
“Haley was the last person I…” He lets his words drift. “After that night, what they did to Haley…what I saw…it haunted me. I was screwed up for a long time. And I had issues…with the scarring on my body. I still do. But, as the years have gone on and with the help of therapy…well, for a few years now, it’s not that I don’t want to have sex. It’s more that I’ve wanted it to be with someone who mattered, and no one has mattered…until you.”
I matter.
My heart fills with joy.
Moving a hand from his chest, I press it to his cheek. I stare into his eyes. “We don’t have to have sex, Kas. We can take this as slow as you need to. So long as we’re together, that’s all I care about.”
His dark eyes bore into mine. “But that’s just it. I don’t want to wait anymore. I’ve already waited so fucking long for you, Daisy. I want you now—tonight.” He pulls me closer, gently brushing his lips over mine. “Spend the night with me.”
Thirty-One
“Yes.”
It’s one simple word, but saying it means everything is about to change between Kas and me.
And it’s what I want. More than anything.
But sex has always been a big thing for me. I’ve never been the type to sleep around, and I haven’t slept with many people. Two, to be exact.
And, obviously, sex is a big deal for Kas, which makes it a bigger deal for me.
He hasn’t had sex in seven years, and the last person he slept with was Haley. I’m close to two years with no sex.
Christ, it’s like we’re both virgins.
No pressure there then.
Nerves twist in my stomach. But they’re quickly erased when Kas smiles against my lips before kissing me harder, his tongue gliding over my lips, seeking entrance. I part my lips, letting him in, and his tongue sweeps over mine, making me shiver.
His large hands go to my bum. Cupping it, he lifts me, like I weigh nothing. I like the way that makes me feel. I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck.
He kisses a path over my cheek. “I want you in my bed,” he whispers in my ear.
“Yes.”
Then, we’re moving. He’s carrying me from the lounge to his bedroom upstairs.
It’s dark when we enter his bedroom. He gently puts me to my feet in the middle of his room, and he walks over and turns on the lamp on his nightstand. It illuminates a soft glow around the room.
His eyes don’t leave mine as he walks toward me.
My body starts to tremble with nerves and need.
Reaching me, he takes my face in his hands and stares down at me. “I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you, Daisy.”
An involuntary shiver runs through me. I know he feels it because his mouth kicks up at the corner.
“I…care about you.” I’m falling for you. “And I wanted you to know that.” And, clearly, I’m too chickenshit to tell you that I’m falling for you. “And I know I broke your trust, prying into your life like I did, and I am beyond sorry for that. And I just wanted you to know how much you mean to me…and that I want to be with you…more than anything.”
He’s not speaking. He’s just staring at me, expressionless.
And my heart sinks. “Okay…well, I guess I should go.” I shoot to my feet and start walking quickly to the door.
“Wait.”
Stupid hope makes my heart pause.
I turn back to him. He’s standing now.
“I don’t want you to go,” he whispers.
“You don’t?”
“No.”
My body trembles as I watch him slowly walk toward me.
My heart is trying its best to climb out of my throat.
I nervously swallow down.
Kas stops in front of me and cups my face in his hands.
His scent surrounds me. His breath blowing gently on my skin.
“Daisy…I haven’t felt anything for a long time. I was dead inside. I guess, to a large degree, I still am. But that moment you came into my life, it was like…taking a breath for the first time in seven years.” He presses his forehead to mine, closing his eyes. “I didn’t want to feel anything for you, so I fought my feelings and pushed you away, but all the pushing and fighting didn’t change the fact that I wanted you more than I’d ever wanted anyone.” Looking at me, he inhales softly. “I…I care about you, too. I don’t want to lose you.”
“I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”
I press my hands to his chest, and he inhales sharply. Almost like my touch has burned him. And I know how he feels because my whole body is burning for him.
“It’s selfish, and I know I don’t deserve you…but I want you so fucking much.”
“Kas…” I whisper, closing my eyes. “I want you, too. So much.”
He takes a shallow breath. I feel his face leave mine.
I blink open my eyes and stare up at him. The look in his eyes causes me to pause. My pulse starts to thrum.
“There’s something you need to know.”
“Okay…” I say, my voice betraying my nerves.
“Daisy, after what happened that night…I wasn’t able to…” His eyes slide away from mine. Looking past me, he takes a deep breath. “I haven’t been with a woman in over seven years.”
Oh. Wow.
“Haley was the last person I…” He lets his words drift. “After that night, what they did to Haley…what I saw…it haunted me. I was screwed up for a long time. And I had issues…with the scarring on my body. I still do. But, as the years have gone on and with the help of therapy…well, for a few years now, it’s not that I don’t want to have sex. It’s more that I’ve wanted it to be with someone who mattered, and no one has mattered…until you.”
I matter.
My heart fills with joy.
Moving a hand from his chest, I press it to his cheek. I stare into his eyes. “We don’t have to have sex, Kas. We can take this as slow as you need to. So long as we’re together, that’s all I care about.”
His dark eyes bore into mine. “But that’s just it. I don’t want to wait anymore. I’ve already waited so fucking long for you, Daisy. I want you now—tonight.” He pulls me closer, gently brushing his lips over mine. “Spend the night with me.”
Thirty-One
“Yes.”
It’s one simple word, but saying it means everything is about to change between Kas and me.
And it’s what I want. More than anything.
But sex has always been a big thing for me. I’ve never been the type to sleep around, and I haven’t slept with many people. Two, to be exact.
And, obviously, sex is a big deal for Kas, which makes it a bigger deal for me.
He hasn’t had sex in seven years, and the last person he slept with was Haley. I’m close to two years with no sex.
Christ, it’s like we’re both virgins.
No pressure there then.
Nerves twist in my stomach. But they’re quickly erased when Kas smiles against my lips before kissing me harder, his tongue gliding over my lips, seeking entrance. I part my lips, letting him in, and his tongue sweeps over mine, making me shiver.
His large hands go to my bum. Cupping it, he lifts me, like I weigh nothing. I like the way that makes me feel. I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck.
He kisses a path over my cheek. “I want you in my bed,” he whispers in my ear.
“Yes.”
Then, we’re moving. He’s carrying me from the lounge to his bedroom upstairs.
It’s dark when we enter his bedroom. He gently puts me to my feet in the middle of his room, and he walks over and turns on the lamp on his nightstand. It illuminates a soft glow around the room.
His eyes don’t leave mine as he walks toward me.
My body starts to tremble with nerves and need.
Reaching me, he takes my face in his hands and stares down at me. “I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you, Daisy.”
An involuntary shiver runs through me. I know he feels it because his mouth kicks up at the corner.
