Until You
Page 81
I didn’t want to disturb this perfect calm, but it was time.
Telling the truth is like lying. Once you do it, it becomes easier.
“What?” Her voice was raspy, and I didn’t know if it was a lion ripping at my stomach or a rhino stomping around my chest, but I was nervous.
“I left my brother at my dad’s house. I ran out of there without him,” I confessed.
She arched her neck back to peer up at me. “Jared, I know. You told me that part. That you tried to get him to leave, but he wouldn’t.”
I nodded. “I didn’t tell you everything, though. The day I ran out, my father had forced me into the basement to help my brother. With what, I didn’t know, but when I got down there, I saw…” The bile started forcing its way up my throat, so I concentrated on my breathing. “I saw my dad’s girlfriend and his friend dead on the basement floor.”
She popped up and stared down at me with pinched eyebrows. “Dead?”
“Come back here.” I pulled her back down, but she propped up her arm in the bed and rested her head on her balled up fist instead.
I guess she wanted eye contact.
“Yeah, as far as I could tell with the f**king distance I kept. Jax was sitting against the far wall, holding his knees against his chest and staring at nothing. He didn’t look scared or angry, just like he was a little confused or something.” I narrowed my eyes, trying to imagine what could have been going through his head.
“How do you know they were dead?” she asked softly and swallowed.
“There was blood. They weren’t moving.” I shook the images from my head. “Anyway, I couldn’t get Jax to wake up, so to speak. He just sat there and would only say that he was fine, and that we had to clean up the mess. It was like he didn’t even know it was me in the room.”
Tate looked at me, concern in her eyes, and I hoped she understood.
“You feel guilty.” She figured me out.
“Yeah,” I admitted. “It was unbearable, being in that house. Being in that basement. Why wouldn’t he come with me?” I asked more to myself than Tate.
“Have you asked him?”
“Once.” I caressed her hair. “He doesn’t remember, he says.”
“What do you think happened down there?” She asked the question I’d been asking myself for years. My father wasn’t arrested for murder. I don’t even know if the police found bodies when I got home and reported my brother’s abuse.
I thought for a minute, afraid to admit out loud what I knew was ridiculous to suspect.
“I think two lowlifes got exactly what they deserved.”
Chapter 35
“Are you sore at all?” I whispered into her hair as we walked into school Monday morning.
Her breathing hitched, and I could hear the smile in her voice. “A little.”
“Good,” I mumbled and hooked my arm around her neck, pulling her in.
I’d taken her back to her house on Saturday night, after Homecoming, and punished her for keeping me at arm’s length all damn week by keeping her up all damn night.
After spending Sunday with my brother and not being able to talk to Tate—because I’d stupidly left my phone at the Beckman party, and it was stolen—I’d crept into her room last night and fallen asleep with her in my arms.
But I woke her up early. We were both half asleep, but it was still hot.
She rolled her eyes at me. “You’re such an ego-maniac,” she complained.
I looked down at her, grinning. “And you love it.”
“Do not,” she pouted, and I put my lips to her forehead.
Yes, you do.
I sighed. “Then I’ll change,” I promised.
“Damn right you will.”
She stopped at her locker, but I stayed behind her, holding her hips. I was becoming a big-pile-of-whipped, but I couldn’t not touch her when she was close.
People had been looking at us during the past week. Used to seeing us as enemies and me never with my hands on a girl in public, they seemed pretty confused.
But instead of shying away and putting on my tough guy face, I gave them all the middle finger.
Well, figuratively.
Looking down the row, I saw Piper and Nate with their heads together, and then they turned to eyeball me.
My stomach rolled, not because I couldn’t handle either of them, but I didn’t want Tate to even register their presence.
She was going to be happy…or else.
Nate looked amused, even with the remnants of the black eye I’d given him weeks ago, while Piper scrunched up her lips like she was disgusted. Her eyes were angry, though, and unease nestled into the back of my brain.
Great.
I was sure I’d be in for a confrontation before the end of the day.
“Alright.” Tate turned around and hugged her books. “I’m off. Are you walking me?”
“No, I have to get my ass to the counselor’s office, actually.”
Saying the word counselor had me wanting to upchuck, but it was required for all Seniors.
“Ah, the what-are-your-future-plans? talk ,” she teased while nodding her head.
I almost let out a laugh with the way my heart jumped. “The only future plans I have are taking you to see a concert over Thanksgiving,” I said quietly as I pulled two tickets out of my pocket.
“Oh!” Her eyes widened, and she snatched the tickets out of my hand. “You didn’t! Avenged Sevenfold!”
Telling the truth is like lying. Once you do it, it becomes easier.
“What?” Her voice was raspy, and I didn’t know if it was a lion ripping at my stomach or a rhino stomping around my chest, but I was nervous.
“I left my brother at my dad’s house. I ran out of there without him,” I confessed.
She arched her neck back to peer up at me. “Jared, I know. You told me that part. That you tried to get him to leave, but he wouldn’t.”
I nodded. “I didn’t tell you everything, though. The day I ran out, my father had forced me into the basement to help my brother. With what, I didn’t know, but when I got down there, I saw…” The bile started forcing its way up my throat, so I concentrated on my breathing. “I saw my dad’s girlfriend and his friend dead on the basement floor.”
She popped up and stared down at me with pinched eyebrows. “Dead?”
“Come back here.” I pulled her back down, but she propped up her arm in the bed and rested her head on her balled up fist instead.
I guess she wanted eye contact.
“Yeah, as far as I could tell with the f**king distance I kept. Jax was sitting against the far wall, holding his knees against his chest and staring at nothing. He didn’t look scared or angry, just like he was a little confused or something.” I narrowed my eyes, trying to imagine what could have been going through his head.
“How do you know they were dead?” she asked softly and swallowed.
“There was blood. They weren’t moving.” I shook the images from my head. “Anyway, I couldn’t get Jax to wake up, so to speak. He just sat there and would only say that he was fine, and that we had to clean up the mess. It was like he didn’t even know it was me in the room.”
Tate looked at me, concern in her eyes, and I hoped she understood.
“You feel guilty.” She figured me out.
“Yeah,” I admitted. “It was unbearable, being in that house. Being in that basement. Why wouldn’t he come with me?” I asked more to myself than Tate.
“Have you asked him?”
“Once.” I caressed her hair. “He doesn’t remember, he says.”
“What do you think happened down there?” She asked the question I’d been asking myself for years. My father wasn’t arrested for murder. I don’t even know if the police found bodies when I got home and reported my brother’s abuse.
I thought for a minute, afraid to admit out loud what I knew was ridiculous to suspect.
“I think two lowlifes got exactly what they deserved.”
Chapter 35
“Are you sore at all?” I whispered into her hair as we walked into school Monday morning.
Her breathing hitched, and I could hear the smile in her voice. “A little.”
“Good,” I mumbled and hooked my arm around her neck, pulling her in.
I’d taken her back to her house on Saturday night, after Homecoming, and punished her for keeping me at arm’s length all damn week by keeping her up all damn night.
After spending Sunday with my brother and not being able to talk to Tate—because I’d stupidly left my phone at the Beckman party, and it was stolen—I’d crept into her room last night and fallen asleep with her in my arms.
But I woke her up early. We were both half asleep, but it was still hot.
She rolled her eyes at me. “You’re such an ego-maniac,” she complained.
I looked down at her, grinning. “And you love it.”
“Do not,” she pouted, and I put my lips to her forehead.
Yes, you do.
I sighed. “Then I’ll change,” I promised.
“Damn right you will.”
She stopped at her locker, but I stayed behind her, holding her hips. I was becoming a big-pile-of-whipped, but I couldn’t not touch her when she was close.
People had been looking at us during the past week. Used to seeing us as enemies and me never with my hands on a girl in public, they seemed pretty confused.
But instead of shying away and putting on my tough guy face, I gave them all the middle finger.
Well, figuratively.
Looking down the row, I saw Piper and Nate with their heads together, and then they turned to eyeball me.
My stomach rolled, not because I couldn’t handle either of them, but I didn’t want Tate to even register their presence.
She was going to be happy…or else.
Nate looked amused, even with the remnants of the black eye I’d given him weeks ago, while Piper scrunched up her lips like she was disgusted. Her eyes were angry, though, and unease nestled into the back of my brain.
Great.
I was sure I’d be in for a confrontation before the end of the day.
“Alright.” Tate turned around and hugged her books. “I’m off. Are you walking me?”
“No, I have to get my ass to the counselor’s office, actually.”
Saying the word counselor had me wanting to upchuck, but it was required for all Seniors.
“Ah, the what-are-your-future-plans? talk ,” she teased while nodding her head.
I almost let out a laugh with the way my heart jumped. “The only future plans I have are taking you to see a concert over Thanksgiving,” I said quietly as I pulled two tickets out of my pocket.
“Oh!” Her eyes widened, and she snatched the tickets out of my hand. “You didn’t! Avenged Sevenfold!”
