Unwritten
Page 69
He takes a step towards me.
“Blake,” I whisper, needing to be strong.
“Zoey.” He lays a hand reverently against my cheek. The touch sends electricity racing through my body, the sweetest rush I’ve ever known.
I clench my hands into fists at my sides. Be strong.
“What are you doing here?” I whisper. “Blake… ”
“I’m here for you,” he murmurs, moving closer. “I know I’ve hurt you, and I took you for granted. I was scared, and stupid, but losing you, it was the worst decision of my life. I’m been going crazy without you,” he says, anguish clear in his eyes. “I swear, if you give me another chance, I’ll never hurt you again.”
His words wash over me, words I’ve fantasized about hearing every night since I walked away. But how can I be sure? How can I trust him after everything that’s happened?
“But your career,” I say, torn. “There’s always going to be another movie, another co-star—”
“But there’ll never be another you.” Blake cuts me off. He takes my hands, gripping them tightly. “We can make this work, I promise. I’m here now, for real. I won’t run again, I swear. I won’t ever leave you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, I was just too dumb and scared to see it before.” His blue eyes blaze into me, insistent. “I mean it, Zoey. This is all because of you. You push me to take risks, and fight for what I want. You make me believe in myself, believe I’m worth a damn.”
“Blake—” I try to argue, but he cuts me off.
“It’s you, Zoey. It’s all because of you. I’ve been so lucky to have you in my life, and I promise, I’ll never let you down again. I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me.”
He pauses, and I can see the nerves in his eyes. It’s a big step, him coming here for me, but the music, the scene: it’s still Blake playing a role he thinks I want from him. The leading man. The big final scene.
But what happens after the credits roll, and we’re back in real life again? This isn’t a movie. This is my heart on the line.
I step back. “I need time,” I manage to say, even though every cell in my body is calling out to him. “I have to think about it.”
Blake’s face falls.
“I didn’t say no,” I tell him quickly. “But this is a lot. You just showing up here, after all these months—”
“I understand.” Blake recovers, then gives me a determined nod. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here, any time you want. I won’t give up on us, Zoey. I promise you that. I’m going to show you.”
He picks up his things and slowly walks away.
I slump back against the wall.
What did you just do? A part of me rages. He’s everything you want in the world! Go after him! Beg him to stay!
But I force myself to turn around and climb back up the fire escape to my apartment. I stand there, in the middle of the silent room, and try to process the emotions whirling in my chest.
I love him. I still do, even after everything. Distance and time has made no difference to that. But loving him doesn’t blind me to reality anymore. I know my love isn’t enough to make this relationship to work, I need him, too. I need him to be as crazy about this as I am; to be committed to weathering whatever storms his career throws between us. Because the only thing worse than losing him right now would be to love him with all my heart—and still have him holding back from me.
The only thing worse than sleeping alone is to lie in the arms of someone who isn’t truly yours, body and soul.
I feel tears coming, and try not to cry. Maybe he means this, I tell myself hopefully. Maybe he will fight for me, make this real at last—
There’s a knock at my door. The takeout delivery, I remember, quickly wiping my face and going to unlock the door. “Just let me grab my wallet—” I say, swinging it open.
Then I stop.
Blake.
He’s standing in the doorway, looking determined.
“Blake…” My heart twists.
“I know, you need time, and I’ll give it to you. But I forgot to say one thing.”
He takes my hands, holding them so gently as his eyes meet mine.
“I love you.”
I pause, all my emotions rushing to the surface.
“I love you,” Blake says again, and there’s none of his usual swagger in this smile. It’s raw and real and from the heart. “I’ve never loved anyone like this, Zoey, and I never will again. You’re my everything, and I swear, whatever it takes to prove myself to you, I’ll do it.”
My heart pounds, but before I can say a word, he kisses me, pulling my body against his and capturing my lips in a fevered, desperate kiss. I couldn’t resist him if I tried. I melt into his arms, losing myself in the familiar taste of him, the rasp of his lips, and the heat as his tongue surges deep into my mouth, claiming me. Possessing me.
It’s real.
Everything I’ve been trying to forget, every sweet moment and hot, breathless night. Every time he was there for me, and every moment I ached to hold him. It all comes crashing around me, as Blake grips my body tight, locking me in the safety of his powerful embrace.
He needs me. I can feel it in the passion of his kiss, the desperate way he clings to me, trying so hard to express what words fail to convey.
That this is everything. Him and I, together, right here. I fall into the moment, and know that no matter how hard I try, I could never find a love like this again.
“Blake,” I whisper, needing to be strong.
“Zoey.” He lays a hand reverently against my cheek. The touch sends electricity racing through my body, the sweetest rush I’ve ever known.
I clench my hands into fists at my sides. Be strong.
“What are you doing here?” I whisper. “Blake… ”
“I’m here for you,” he murmurs, moving closer. “I know I’ve hurt you, and I took you for granted. I was scared, and stupid, but losing you, it was the worst decision of my life. I’m been going crazy without you,” he says, anguish clear in his eyes. “I swear, if you give me another chance, I’ll never hurt you again.”
His words wash over me, words I’ve fantasized about hearing every night since I walked away. But how can I be sure? How can I trust him after everything that’s happened?
“But your career,” I say, torn. “There’s always going to be another movie, another co-star—”
“But there’ll never be another you.” Blake cuts me off. He takes my hands, gripping them tightly. “We can make this work, I promise. I’m here now, for real. I won’t run again, I swear. I won’t ever leave you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, I was just too dumb and scared to see it before.” His blue eyes blaze into me, insistent. “I mean it, Zoey. This is all because of you. You push me to take risks, and fight for what I want. You make me believe in myself, believe I’m worth a damn.”
“Blake—” I try to argue, but he cuts me off.
“It’s you, Zoey. It’s all because of you. I’ve been so lucky to have you in my life, and I promise, I’ll never let you down again. I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me.”
He pauses, and I can see the nerves in his eyes. It’s a big step, him coming here for me, but the music, the scene: it’s still Blake playing a role he thinks I want from him. The leading man. The big final scene.
But what happens after the credits roll, and we’re back in real life again? This isn’t a movie. This is my heart on the line.
I step back. “I need time,” I manage to say, even though every cell in my body is calling out to him. “I have to think about it.”
Blake’s face falls.
“I didn’t say no,” I tell him quickly. “But this is a lot. You just showing up here, after all these months—”
“I understand.” Blake recovers, then gives me a determined nod. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here, any time you want. I won’t give up on us, Zoey. I promise you that. I’m going to show you.”
He picks up his things and slowly walks away.
I slump back against the wall.
What did you just do? A part of me rages. He’s everything you want in the world! Go after him! Beg him to stay!
But I force myself to turn around and climb back up the fire escape to my apartment. I stand there, in the middle of the silent room, and try to process the emotions whirling in my chest.
I love him. I still do, even after everything. Distance and time has made no difference to that. But loving him doesn’t blind me to reality anymore. I know my love isn’t enough to make this relationship to work, I need him, too. I need him to be as crazy about this as I am; to be committed to weathering whatever storms his career throws between us. Because the only thing worse than losing him right now would be to love him with all my heart—and still have him holding back from me.
The only thing worse than sleeping alone is to lie in the arms of someone who isn’t truly yours, body and soul.
I feel tears coming, and try not to cry. Maybe he means this, I tell myself hopefully. Maybe he will fight for me, make this real at last—
There’s a knock at my door. The takeout delivery, I remember, quickly wiping my face and going to unlock the door. “Just let me grab my wallet—” I say, swinging it open.
Then I stop.
Blake.
He’s standing in the doorway, looking determined.
“Blake…” My heart twists.
“I know, you need time, and I’ll give it to you. But I forgot to say one thing.”
He takes my hands, holding them so gently as his eyes meet mine.
“I love you.”
I pause, all my emotions rushing to the surface.
“I love you,” Blake says again, and there’s none of his usual swagger in this smile. It’s raw and real and from the heart. “I’ve never loved anyone like this, Zoey, and I never will again. You’re my everything, and I swear, whatever it takes to prove myself to you, I’ll do it.”
My heart pounds, but before I can say a word, he kisses me, pulling my body against his and capturing my lips in a fevered, desperate kiss. I couldn’t resist him if I tried. I melt into his arms, losing myself in the familiar taste of him, the rasp of his lips, and the heat as his tongue surges deep into my mouth, claiming me. Possessing me.
It’s real.
Everything I’ve been trying to forget, every sweet moment and hot, breathless night. Every time he was there for me, and every moment I ached to hold him. It all comes crashing around me, as Blake grips my body tight, locking me in the safety of his powerful embrace.
He needs me. I can feel it in the passion of his kiss, the desperate way he clings to me, trying so hard to express what words fail to convey.
That this is everything. Him and I, together, right here. I fall into the moment, and know that no matter how hard I try, I could never find a love like this again.
