Valley of Silence
Page 44
“Majesty.” Niall, the big guard who was now one of her trusted captains, stepped before her. “Should I order the gates opened?”
“In a moment. You wish you were going today.”
“I serve at your pleasure, my lady.”
“Your wishes are your own, Niall, and I understand them. But I need you here a bit longer. You’ll have your time soon enough.” They would all have their time, she thought. “Your brother and his family? How are they?”
“Safe, thanks to Lord Larkin and the lady Blair. Though my brother’s leg is healing, he won’t be able to fight on his feet.”
“There will be more to this than swinging a sword on the battlefield.”
“Aye.” His hand closed over the hilt of the blade at his side. “But in truth I’m ready to swing mine.”
She nodded. “You will.” She drew a breath. “Open the gates.”
For the second time she watched her people march away from the safety of the castle. It would be a scene repeated, she knew, until she herself rode through the gates, leaving behind the very old, the very young, the ill and infirm.
“It’s a clear day,” Larkin said from beside her. “They should reach the first base safely.”
Saying nothing, Moira looked over to where Sinann stood, a child in her arms, another in her belly, one more at her skirts. “She never wept.”
“She wouldn’t send Phelan off with tears.”
“They must be like a flood inside her, yet even now she won’t let her children see them. If courage of heart is a weapon, Larkin, we’ll sweep the enemy out of existence.”
When she turned to go he fell into step with her. “There wasn’t time,” he began, “to speak with you before. Or after.”
“Before the ceremony.” Her voice was cool as the morning now. “After you invaded my private life.”
“I didn’t invade it. I was just there, at what was an awkward time for everyone involved. Cian and I resolved matters between us.”
“Oh, did you?” Her eyebrows winged up as she spared him a glance. “Hardly surprising, as men will resolve matters between them one way or another.”
“Don’t take that royal tone with me.” He took her arm, drew her toward one of the gardens, and more privacy. “How, I’m asking you, would you expect me to react when I’ve seen you’ve been with him?”
“I suppose expecting you to be well-mannered enough to excuse yourself is too much to ask.”
“That’s damn right. When I think a man of damn near eternal experiences seduces you—”
“It was the other way around. Entirely.”
He flushed, scratched his head, turned a frustrated circle. “I don’t want to know the details of it, if you don’t mind. I’ve apologized to him.”
“And to me?”
“What do you want from me, Moira? I love you.”
“I expect you to understand I’m a woman grown, and one capable of making her own decisions about taking a lover. Don’t wince at the term,” she snapped impatiently. “I can rule, I can fight, I can die if need be, but your sensibilities are bruised at the thought I can have a lover?”
He thought it over. “Aye. But they’ll get over it. I only want, more than anything, never to see you hurt. Not in battle, not in the heart. Is that enough?”
Her feathers smoothed out, and her heart softened as it always did with him. “It must be, as I want the same for you. Larkin, would you say that I have a good, strong mind?”
“Almost too much of both at times.”
“In my mind, I know that I can’t have a life with Cian. In my head I understand that what I’ve done will one day cause me grief and pain and sorrow. But in my heart I need what I can have with him now.”
She brushed her fingers over the leaves of a flowering shrub. The leaves would fall, she thought, with the first frost. Many things would fall.
“When I put my head and heart together, I know, in both, that he and I are better for what we gave to each other. How can you love and turn away?”
“I don’ t know.”
She looked back toward the courtyard where people were once again going about their business, their routines. Life went on, she mused, whatever fell. They would see that life went on.
“Your sister watched her man ride away from her, and knows she might never see him alive again. But she didn’t weep in front of him, or in front of their children. When she weeps, she’ll weep alone. They’re her tears to shed. So will mine be, when this ends.”
“Will you do something for me?”
“If I can.”
He touched her cheek. “When you have tears, will you remember I have a shoulder for you?”
She smiled now. “I will.”
When they parted, she went to the parlor where she found Blair and Glenna already discussing the day’s schedule.
“Hoyt?” Moira asked as she poured herself tea.
“Hard at work. We had a slew of new weapons finished yesterday.” Glenna rubbed tired eyes. “We’ll be charming them twenty-four/seven. I’m going to work with some of those who’ll be staying here when the rest of us leave. Basic precautions, defensive, offensive tutorials.”
“I’ll help you with that. And you, Blair?”
“As soon as Larkin’s finished playing pimp, we’re—”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“He’s got a horny mare, and cleared it with Cian to have Vlad give her a bang. She doesn’t even get dinner and drinks first. I thought he told you.”
“No, we had other matters, and it must have slipped his mind. So he’s having Cian’s stallion stand as stud.” Her smile came slowly. Yes, life went on. “That’s a fine thing. Strong and hopeful—and damn clever, too, as he may be starting a brilliant line there. So, that’s what he was about, knocking on Cian’s door before sunrise.”
“He figured if Cian gave the go-ahead, he could—Wait.” Blair held up a hand. “Replay. How do you know he knocked on Cian’s door before sunrise?”
“Because I was just leaving the room when Larkin arrived.” Moira sipped her tea calmly while Blair slanted a look at Glenna, then puffed out her cheeks.
“In a moment. You wish you were going today.”
“I serve at your pleasure, my lady.”
“Your wishes are your own, Niall, and I understand them. But I need you here a bit longer. You’ll have your time soon enough.” They would all have their time, she thought. “Your brother and his family? How are they?”
“Safe, thanks to Lord Larkin and the lady Blair. Though my brother’s leg is healing, he won’t be able to fight on his feet.”
“There will be more to this than swinging a sword on the battlefield.”
“Aye.” His hand closed over the hilt of the blade at his side. “But in truth I’m ready to swing mine.”
She nodded. “You will.” She drew a breath. “Open the gates.”
For the second time she watched her people march away from the safety of the castle. It would be a scene repeated, she knew, until she herself rode through the gates, leaving behind the very old, the very young, the ill and infirm.
“It’s a clear day,” Larkin said from beside her. “They should reach the first base safely.”
Saying nothing, Moira looked over to where Sinann stood, a child in her arms, another in her belly, one more at her skirts. “She never wept.”
“She wouldn’t send Phelan off with tears.”
“They must be like a flood inside her, yet even now she won’t let her children see them. If courage of heart is a weapon, Larkin, we’ll sweep the enemy out of existence.”
When she turned to go he fell into step with her. “There wasn’t time,” he began, “to speak with you before. Or after.”
“Before the ceremony.” Her voice was cool as the morning now. “After you invaded my private life.”
“I didn’t invade it. I was just there, at what was an awkward time for everyone involved. Cian and I resolved matters between us.”
“Oh, did you?” Her eyebrows winged up as she spared him a glance. “Hardly surprising, as men will resolve matters between them one way or another.”
“Don’t take that royal tone with me.” He took her arm, drew her toward one of the gardens, and more privacy. “How, I’m asking you, would you expect me to react when I’ve seen you’ve been with him?”
“I suppose expecting you to be well-mannered enough to excuse yourself is too much to ask.”
“That’s damn right. When I think a man of damn near eternal experiences seduces you—”
“It was the other way around. Entirely.”
He flushed, scratched his head, turned a frustrated circle. “I don’t want to know the details of it, if you don’t mind. I’ve apologized to him.”
“And to me?”
“What do you want from me, Moira? I love you.”
“I expect you to understand I’m a woman grown, and one capable of making her own decisions about taking a lover. Don’t wince at the term,” she snapped impatiently. “I can rule, I can fight, I can die if need be, but your sensibilities are bruised at the thought I can have a lover?”
He thought it over. “Aye. But they’ll get over it. I only want, more than anything, never to see you hurt. Not in battle, not in the heart. Is that enough?”
Her feathers smoothed out, and her heart softened as it always did with him. “It must be, as I want the same for you. Larkin, would you say that I have a good, strong mind?”
“Almost too much of both at times.”
“In my mind, I know that I can’t have a life with Cian. In my head I understand that what I’ve done will one day cause me grief and pain and sorrow. But in my heart I need what I can have with him now.”
She brushed her fingers over the leaves of a flowering shrub. The leaves would fall, she thought, with the first frost. Many things would fall.
“When I put my head and heart together, I know, in both, that he and I are better for what we gave to each other. How can you love and turn away?”
“I don’ t know.”
She looked back toward the courtyard where people were once again going about their business, their routines. Life went on, she mused, whatever fell. They would see that life went on.
“Your sister watched her man ride away from her, and knows she might never see him alive again. But she didn’t weep in front of him, or in front of their children. When she weeps, she’ll weep alone. They’re her tears to shed. So will mine be, when this ends.”
“Will you do something for me?”
“If I can.”
He touched her cheek. “When you have tears, will you remember I have a shoulder for you?”
She smiled now. “I will.”
When they parted, she went to the parlor where she found Blair and Glenna already discussing the day’s schedule.
“Hoyt?” Moira asked as she poured herself tea.
“Hard at work. We had a slew of new weapons finished yesterday.” Glenna rubbed tired eyes. “We’ll be charming them twenty-four/seven. I’m going to work with some of those who’ll be staying here when the rest of us leave. Basic precautions, defensive, offensive tutorials.”
“I’ll help you with that. And you, Blair?”
“As soon as Larkin’s finished playing pimp, we’re—”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“He’s got a horny mare, and cleared it with Cian to have Vlad give her a bang. She doesn’t even get dinner and drinks first. I thought he told you.”
“No, we had other matters, and it must have slipped his mind. So he’s having Cian’s stallion stand as stud.” Her smile came slowly. Yes, life went on. “That’s a fine thing. Strong and hopeful—and damn clever, too, as he may be starting a brilliant line there. So, that’s what he was about, knocking on Cian’s door before sunrise.”
“He figured if Cian gave the go-ahead, he could—Wait.” Blair held up a hand. “Replay. How do you know he knocked on Cian’s door before sunrise?”
“Because I was just leaving the room when Larkin arrived.” Moira sipped her tea calmly while Blair slanted a look at Glenna, then puffed out her cheeks.
