Visions
Page 22
I just smiled and said, “Hey,” back.
“What can I get you?” he asked.
“I can—”
“My invitation. My treat. And if you feel guilty about that, you can get it next time.” Another flash of a grin. “Which means there has to be a next time. See? I have it all worked out.”
“A mocha, please.”
He was back in a minute, setting it down and swinging into his chair with, “So you have to work at three, right?”
“I do.”
“Plenty of time, but I’ll watch the clock to be sure. What are you up to these days?”
I told him, and he earned the distinction of being the first person who didn’t react like I was punishing myself by working in the diner. He understood. His life might seem radically different from mine, but it wasn’t really. We’d both been raised in a successful family business, where it was expected that if you wanted a job, that’s where you’d work, and if you wanted to just focus on your studies, that was fine, too. We were also both only children raised by a devoted father—as healthy a father–child relationship as you could ask for, whether Daddy owned a landmark department store or ran a notorious biker gang. Ricky’s mother wasn’t in the picture. He didn’t go into detail, but it seemed she was a doctor in Philadelphia. He saw her now and then, and they had a good relationship, but she was more like a distant aunt.
The only thing that kept it from being a perfect coffee break was Ricky’s phone, which kept buzzing. He hit Ignore every time, but it was almost nonstop, and he finally apologized.
“I’d turn the damned thing off, but my dad needs to be able to get hold of me at any time. Club rules. If he calls, I have to take it. Otherwise, it’s just birthday wishes.”
“Birthday? You mean it’s your . . . ? Shit. I’m sorry. I would never have suggested today—”
“Um, pretty sure I suggested it. I don’t have plans until tonight, and then it’s just take-Ricky-to-dinner-and-embarrass-the-hell-out-of-him.”
“Do they make the servers sing ‘Happy Birthday’?”
“Probably. Most of the guys have known me since I was in diapers. To some of them I still am.”
“And how old are you?”
A pause.
“Ah, so you aren’t telling?”
“No, just . . . I’m probably not as old as you think I am.” When I didn’t reply right away, he said, “Uh-huh. That’s what I thought.”
“Sorry, I’m . . . just surprised. It doesn’t matter, of course.”
“Because you aren’t planning to go out with me. But if you were considering it, that would be fine, because two years is not a big age gap. And yes, I know how old you are.”
“So you just turned twenty-three?”
“That’s not two years.”
“Well, I’ll be twenty-five this fall, so if you’re twenty-two today, that means you’re actually two and a half years younger—”
“You stop counting half years at three. That’s the rule.”
“Is it?”
“It is. It’d be fine if I was two years older than you, right?” He knew the answer to that, considering I’d been engaged to a thirty-year-old. “In fact, one could argue that this would be all the more reason to go out with me, while you decide whether you want to recommit to James. What better way to explore your options than to date a guy who has nothing in common with your former fiancé.”
“James has an MBA.”
“And I don’t yet. See? Totally different. So I would suggest we go out if I hadn’t already promised not to bring it up. Now I’ll drop the subject by asking you the topic of your master’s thesis. Also? It’s one.”
“I wasn’t checking—”
“Yes, you were. Subtly. I promised not to push for a date, and when I veered off track, you checked your watch, seeing if it was late enough to bolt, should I continue. I promise no more pushing, prodding, or even hinting. We have thirty minutes. I’ve already set the alarm on my phone.”
—
At 1:30, Ricky and I were walking into the parking lot behind the coffee shop. His motorcycle was right up front, squeezed into a spot too small for a car. I was parked at the far side.
Beside the lot was a playground. Empty swings twisted forlornly in the brisk wind. Brightly colored ride-on animals rocked, riderless. There was an air of desolation here, of abandonment. Kids in this neighborhood had better things to do than ride smiling purple hippos. I thought of the park in Cainsville, clearly beloved for generations, and I felt a pang of sympathy for this one, and for the kids here. Silly, I know, but I thought, I’m glad I live in a place where kids still want to ride purple hippos.
We were saying our goodbyes when Ricky trailed off midsentence, staring at something over my shoulder. I turned and saw . . .
The hound stood in the park, watching us. Ricky was staring, but not in the way one might look at a big dog on the loose, with concern or trepidation. He looked as I imagine I must have when I saw it the second time—in confusion and disbelief, certain my eyes were playing tricks on me.
“Wow, that’s a big dog,” I managed finally.
“Dog . . .” His voice was oddly hollow, distant, and uncertain. “Yeah. That’s . . . a dog?” His voice rose as if in question. A hard blink, followed by a short laugh. “Obviously.” He rubbed his thumbs over his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Clearly I’ve had too much caffeine.”
“It is a very big dog.” Standing there. Staring. At Ricky.
“An unaccompanied and unrestrained big dog. I should walk you to your car.”
“It’s right over there. I’ll be—”
“No. I’ll walk you to your car.”
His voice had taken on a tone I’d heard in the clubhouse with one of the girls and, later, with Gabriel. A reminder that while he was charming and easygoing, he was still a gang leader’s son. He followed it with a softer “This way?” and I nodded.
As we crossed the lot, he kept his gaze on the beast, and I could say that was just common sense—don’t turn your back on a threat—but Ricky still looked confused, as if trying to figure out what the hell he was seeing. I wanted to ask: Exactly how big is it? Does it have reddish-brown eyes? What really made my stomach twist, though, was the way the beast stared at him.
“What can I get you?” he asked.
“I can—”
“My invitation. My treat. And if you feel guilty about that, you can get it next time.” Another flash of a grin. “Which means there has to be a next time. See? I have it all worked out.”
“A mocha, please.”
He was back in a minute, setting it down and swinging into his chair with, “So you have to work at three, right?”
“I do.”
“Plenty of time, but I’ll watch the clock to be sure. What are you up to these days?”
I told him, and he earned the distinction of being the first person who didn’t react like I was punishing myself by working in the diner. He understood. His life might seem radically different from mine, but it wasn’t really. We’d both been raised in a successful family business, where it was expected that if you wanted a job, that’s where you’d work, and if you wanted to just focus on your studies, that was fine, too. We were also both only children raised by a devoted father—as healthy a father–child relationship as you could ask for, whether Daddy owned a landmark department store or ran a notorious biker gang. Ricky’s mother wasn’t in the picture. He didn’t go into detail, but it seemed she was a doctor in Philadelphia. He saw her now and then, and they had a good relationship, but she was more like a distant aunt.
The only thing that kept it from being a perfect coffee break was Ricky’s phone, which kept buzzing. He hit Ignore every time, but it was almost nonstop, and he finally apologized.
“I’d turn the damned thing off, but my dad needs to be able to get hold of me at any time. Club rules. If he calls, I have to take it. Otherwise, it’s just birthday wishes.”
“Birthday? You mean it’s your . . . ? Shit. I’m sorry. I would never have suggested today—”
“Um, pretty sure I suggested it. I don’t have plans until tonight, and then it’s just take-Ricky-to-dinner-and-embarrass-the-hell-out-of-him.”
“Do they make the servers sing ‘Happy Birthday’?”
“Probably. Most of the guys have known me since I was in diapers. To some of them I still am.”
“And how old are you?”
A pause.
“Ah, so you aren’t telling?”
“No, just . . . I’m probably not as old as you think I am.” When I didn’t reply right away, he said, “Uh-huh. That’s what I thought.”
“Sorry, I’m . . . just surprised. It doesn’t matter, of course.”
“Because you aren’t planning to go out with me. But if you were considering it, that would be fine, because two years is not a big age gap. And yes, I know how old you are.”
“So you just turned twenty-three?”
“That’s not two years.”
“Well, I’ll be twenty-five this fall, so if you’re twenty-two today, that means you’re actually two and a half years younger—”
“You stop counting half years at three. That’s the rule.”
“Is it?”
“It is. It’d be fine if I was two years older than you, right?” He knew the answer to that, considering I’d been engaged to a thirty-year-old. “In fact, one could argue that this would be all the more reason to go out with me, while you decide whether you want to recommit to James. What better way to explore your options than to date a guy who has nothing in common with your former fiancé.”
“James has an MBA.”
“And I don’t yet. See? Totally different. So I would suggest we go out if I hadn’t already promised not to bring it up. Now I’ll drop the subject by asking you the topic of your master’s thesis. Also? It’s one.”
“I wasn’t checking—”
“Yes, you were. Subtly. I promised not to push for a date, and when I veered off track, you checked your watch, seeing if it was late enough to bolt, should I continue. I promise no more pushing, prodding, or even hinting. We have thirty minutes. I’ve already set the alarm on my phone.”
—
At 1:30, Ricky and I were walking into the parking lot behind the coffee shop. His motorcycle was right up front, squeezed into a spot too small for a car. I was parked at the far side.
Beside the lot was a playground. Empty swings twisted forlornly in the brisk wind. Brightly colored ride-on animals rocked, riderless. There was an air of desolation here, of abandonment. Kids in this neighborhood had better things to do than ride smiling purple hippos. I thought of the park in Cainsville, clearly beloved for generations, and I felt a pang of sympathy for this one, and for the kids here. Silly, I know, but I thought, I’m glad I live in a place where kids still want to ride purple hippos.
We were saying our goodbyes when Ricky trailed off midsentence, staring at something over my shoulder. I turned and saw . . .
The hound stood in the park, watching us. Ricky was staring, but not in the way one might look at a big dog on the loose, with concern or trepidation. He looked as I imagine I must have when I saw it the second time—in confusion and disbelief, certain my eyes were playing tricks on me.
“Wow, that’s a big dog,” I managed finally.
“Dog . . .” His voice was oddly hollow, distant, and uncertain. “Yeah. That’s . . . a dog?” His voice rose as if in question. A hard blink, followed by a short laugh. “Obviously.” He rubbed his thumbs over his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Clearly I’ve had too much caffeine.”
“It is a very big dog.” Standing there. Staring. At Ricky.
“An unaccompanied and unrestrained big dog. I should walk you to your car.”
“It’s right over there. I’ll be—”
“No. I’ll walk you to your car.”
His voice had taken on a tone I’d heard in the clubhouse with one of the girls and, later, with Gabriel. A reminder that while he was charming and easygoing, he was still a gang leader’s son. He followed it with a softer “This way?” and I nodded.
As we crossed the lot, he kept his gaze on the beast, and I could say that was just common sense—don’t turn your back on a threat—but Ricky still looked confused, as if trying to figure out what the hell he was seeing. I wanted to ask: Exactly how big is it? Does it have reddish-brown eyes? What really made my stomach twist, though, was the way the beast stared at him.
