Warmth in Ice
Page 26
And there was the ugly. A picture of my down turned face, tears falling to the ground. Shattered glass at my feet. The words, today I lost everything, broke my heart all over again.
“Keep reading,” Clay whispered, his voice thick with emotion.
I scrubbed at my face and turned the page to see a drawing of Clay and Ruby. Words I remembered writing, flowed over the top of the page. It was from the scrapbook I had put together for Clay after he had left Davidson. The scrapbook I had taken to Ruby to give him on his birthday.
Below the picture, Clay had written: Today I was given hope.
It was then that I had to put the book down. I was overwhelmed with the enormity of this gift. Clay leaned forward and cupped my face in his hands.
“Did I screw up? If it’s too much, I totally understand. I know I can be a bit on the intense side.” I laughed at his too true statement.
Clay kissed my lips. “I just wanted to show you that every moment has mattered. That every tiny second has changed me. You have changed me, Maggie. You’ve given me something I had never dared to dream for myself. A future. Hope. Love. I can’t even begin to put into words what your gifts have done for me. All I can do is cherish and adore you every day for the rest of my life.”
“Sheesh, Clay. How can I compete with this?” I ask, holding up the book. “My gift is seriously lame in comparison.” I gave him a watery smile that Clay returned.
“I like lame,” Clay grinned and I punched his arm playfully. I grabbed Clay’s gifts and handed him the first one. Clay unwrapped a world atlas.
“Cool…” he said, turning it over in his hands. Noticing a few tabs at the top, he opened them to the pages they marked. One was a map of France. Another Egypt. The last one showed Peru.
“These are places we’ve talked about wanting to go. I figured we could start planning a few trips. You know for the time when we can go together,” I hurried. I had gotten the book with the idea that it showed Clay I had plans for us that went beyond today, tomorrow, or next year. I wanted him to know that I wanted to see the world with him. That every new experience in my life would involve him in some way.
“I love it,” Clay said, his voice breaking and I knew he got what I was trying to say. He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me forward, crushing his lips to mine. I broke away after a few minutes, completely breathless.
“Well, hell, if that’s what I get for an atlas, check out the rest of your gifts,” I teased. Clay unwrapped a new art set and a super swank I-Pod filled with all the music I knew he loved.
I left him to his presents and went to the bathroom to get a shower. When I came back out, I found that Clay had opened his new art set and was bent over the book he had given me, drawing.
He looked up as I approached and I saw what he was doing. He had drawn a new picture at the back of our story. This one showed the two of us, sitting together in front of our small Christmas tree. He had written at the bottom: Today I was given the greatest gift of all…you.
“You are such a mush ball,” I teased, leaning down to kiss his mouth. Clay grinned underneath my lips.
“You love it,” he said, smiling.
I kissed him soundly before replying, “No, I love you. For forever.”
Spending time with Clay at Christmas did everything I hoped it would. I made the journey to Florida feeling apprehensive and unsure. Clay and I had been struggling to solidify our relationship even as we fought to overcome all of the insecurity and mistrust that had defined our past.
Clay was waging a war against the demons inside of him as I was trying to build a life for myself over a thousand miles away.
But that’s not the chapter we were living. We weren’t at the end of our happily ever after…yet. We still had the growing and learning left to do.
And seeing him for those few days restored everything that I knew to be true about us. We were a boy and a girl who loved each other past all reason, past all logic, and to the point that we could over look just about anything to be together.
We were each doing what was needed to make sure that when the day came and we could finally walk side by side into that future we wanted, we were doing it as the best people we could be.
We would still feel the doubts, the conflict over our decisions. But they were only bumps in the road, not the defining path we were taking.
Three days later, as I sat on the plane that would take me back to Virginia, I didn’t feel the painful, scary knot in my stomach. I held the book Clay had given me in my lap and I didn’t worry whether the man I loved was walking farther and farther away from me. I knew that this was it…for both of us.
This was our story.
And one way or another we’d get our happy ending.
Epilogue
Ruby straightened my collar and smoothed the lapels of my jacket. This was taking a lot longer than necessary, mostly due to my aunt’s frequent tears and sniffling.
“You look so handsome,” Ruby said, blowing her nose for the millionth time. I grinned over her head at Daniel, who was trying to fix his bowtie.
“What about me, Ruby? Tell me I’m handsome,” Daniel whined. Ruby chuckled and turned her attention to Daniel, leaving me to finish getting myself ready with a lot less snot.
I mouthed “thank you” across the room as Ruby went about straightening his best man attire.
“You both look wonderful. But you already knew that,” Ruby patted Daniel’s cheek and he gave her a toothy grin.
The door to the room where we were getting ready flew open, followed by a blur of dark brown curls and a frantic Rachel not far behind.
“Keep reading,” Clay whispered, his voice thick with emotion.
I scrubbed at my face and turned the page to see a drawing of Clay and Ruby. Words I remembered writing, flowed over the top of the page. It was from the scrapbook I had put together for Clay after he had left Davidson. The scrapbook I had taken to Ruby to give him on his birthday.
Below the picture, Clay had written: Today I was given hope.
It was then that I had to put the book down. I was overwhelmed with the enormity of this gift. Clay leaned forward and cupped my face in his hands.
“Did I screw up? If it’s too much, I totally understand. I know I can be a bit on the intense side.” I laughed at his too true statement.
Clay kissed my lips. “I just wanted to show you that every moment has mattered. That every tiny second has changed me. You have changed me, Maggie. You’ve given me something I had never dared to dream for myself. A future. Hope. Love. I can’t even begin to put into words what your gifts have done for me. All I can do is cherish and adore you every day for the rest of my life.”
“Sheesh, Clay. How can I compete with this?” I ask, holding up the book. “My gift is seriously lame in comparison.” I gave him a watery smile that Clay returned.
“I like lame,” Clay grinned and I punched his arm playfully. I grabbed Clay’s gifts and handed him the first one. Clay unwrapped a world atlas.
“Cool…” he said, turning it over in his hands. Noticing a few tabs at the top, he opened them to the pages they marked. One was a map of France. Another Egypt. The last one showed Peru.
“These are places we’ve talked about wanting to go. I figured we could start planning a few trips. You know for the time when we can go together,” I hurried. I had gotten the book with the idea that it showed Clay I had plans for us that went beyond today, tomorrow, or next year. I wanted him to know that I wanted to see the world with him. That every new experience in my life would involve him in some way.
“I love it,” Clay said, his voice breaking and I knew he got what I was trying to say. He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me forward, crushing his lips to mine. I broke away after a few minutes, completely breathless.
“Well, hell, if that’s what I get for an atlas, check out the rest of your gifts,” I teased. Clay unwrapped a new art set and a super swank I-Pod filled with all the music I knew he loved.
I left him to his presents and went to the bathroom to get a shower. When I came back out, I found that Clay had opened his new art set and was bent over the book he had given me, drawing.
He looked up as I approached and I saw what he was doing. He had drawn a new picture at the back of our story. This one showed the two of us, sitting together in front of our small Christmas tree. He had written at the bottom: Today I was given the greatest gift of all…you.
“You are such a mush ball,” I teased, leaning down to kiss his mouth. Clay grinned underneath my lips.
“You love it,” he said, smiling.
I kissed him soundly before replying, “No, I love you. For forever.”
Spending time with Clay at Christmas did everything I hoped it would. I made the journey to Florida feeling apprehensive and unsure. Clay and I had been struggling to solidify our relationship even as we fought to overcome all of the insecurity and mistrust that had defined our past.
Clay was waging a war against the demons inside of him as I was trying to build a life for myself over a thousand miles away.
But that’s not the chapter we were living. We weren’t at the end of our happily ever after…yet. We still had the growing and learning left to do.
And seeing him for those few days restored everything that I knew to be true about us. We were a boy and a girl who loved each other past all reason, past all logic, and to the point that we could over look just about anything to be together.
We were each doing what was needed to make sure that when the day came and we could finally walk side by side into that future we wanted, we were doing it as the best people we could be.
We would still feel the doubts, the conflict over our decisions. But they were only bumps in the road, not the defining path we were taking.
Three days later, as I sat on the plane that would take me back to Virginia, I didn’t feel the painful, scary knot in my stomach. I held the book Clay had given me in my lap and I didn’t worry whether the man I loved was walking farther and farther away from me. I knew that this was it…for both of us.
This was our story.
And one way or another we’d get our happy ending.
Epilogue
Ruby straightened my collar and smoothed the lapels of my jacket. This was taking a lot longer than necessary, mostly due to my aunt’s frequent tears and sniffling.
“You look so handsome,” Ruby said, blowing her nose for the millionth time. I grinned over her head at Daniel, who was trying to fix his bowtie.
“What about me, Ruby? Tell me I’m handsome,” Daniel whined. Ruby chuckled and turned her attention to Daniel, leaving me to finish getting myself ready with a lot less snot.
I mouthed “thank you” across the room as Ruby went about straightening his best man attire.
“You both look wonderful. But you already knew that,” Ruby patted Daniel’s cheek and he gave her a toothy grin.
The door to the room where we were getting ready flew open, followed by a blur of dark brown curls and a frantic Rachel not far behind.
