What We Find
Page 19
“I am so lousy at men,” she muttered to herself.
But Andrew shouldn’t have been a mistake. Her eyes had been wide-open—they were both professionals with young practices and bruised hearts. She’d been thirty-four, he almost forty. His marriage had been longer but far more expensive than hers, and his ex had been so mean. Sergei hadn’t been mean, not at all. In fact he’d been charming. Sweet. And after nine months of marriage expected a house, a car and 50 percent of her income for the next twenty years.
It turned out she’d had good instincts about lawyers. Thank God.
She didn’t listen to Andrew’s message, but she saved it. There would probably be a time soon when she’d crave that soothing voice. She wondered if he even realized that after all the storms she’d weathered lately one of her darkest hours had been the sight of Sully gripping his chest, panting, washing pale. She knew true terror in that moment.
It was amusing to Maggie that her mother thought Sully was such a loser, a simple, laid-back general-store owner, a country boy, an underachiever. Maggie didn’t see him that way at all. Sully was her rock. In fact, he was a rock for a lot of people. He had a strong moral compass, for one thing. He worked hard but he wasn’t a slave to his work, he saw the merits to a balanced life. He was possessed of a country wisdom attained through many years of watching people and learning about human nature. And he was true. He was the most loyal individual on earth. Sully thought Maggie was smart to strive to be as successful as Walter. But Maggie wished she could be more like Sully.
She settled back on the couch and decided to listen to Andrew’s message.
“Maggie, listen, babe, I’m sorry about your crisis with Sully. Is he there with you in Denver? When I get a day I can come up and check on you both...”
“I don’t want to be checked on,” she said to the phone.
“It’s been pretty crazy here or I might’ve heard sooner. I just heard about the bypass a couple of days ago but I was told he was doing great and you were with him so I didn’t jump on the phone.”
“Yeah, why would you do that?”
“And what’s this I hear that you took a vacation? Of indefinite duration? I hope that doesn’t have anything to do with our disagreement. I know you’re probably upset with me, I know that. Honey, I just want what’s best for you and I could tell I wasn’t helping anything. Maybe I made the wrong call but I thought it was probably best if you looked further than me to get support right now. I don’t know anyone who could cope with all you’ve been through any better than you have, but I just felt so helpless, and that wasn’t good for you...”
“I sucked the life out of you, remember?”
“Call me, please. Or email me or something. Let me know what I can do, when we can talk. You know how much I care about you and Sully.”
“Actually, I’m a little murky on that...”
“Maggie?” Sully said from the hall. “Who the devil are you talking to?”
She jumped in surprise. He was wearing his pajamas, his white hair mussed and spiking. “Um...the television?”
“The TV isn’t on,” he said.
“Okay, I was talking back to a message from Andrew. You don’t dump someone and then leave a kind and caring message. Too little, too late.”
“Hmm,” he said, thinking on that for a moment.
“I guess I need a fresh start,” she informed him. “I’d like to go back to eighth grade and redo everything.”
“I think this heart attack business has taken a toll on you,” he said. “I’m sorry about that.”
But Andrew shouldn’t have been a mistake. Her eyes had been wide-open—they were both professionals with young practices and bruised hearts. She’d been thirty-four, he almost forty. His marriage had been longer but far more expensive than hers, and his ex had been so mean. Sergei hadn’t been mean, not at all. In fact he’d been charming. Sweet. And after nine months of marriage expected a house, a car and 50 percent of her income for the next twenty years.
It turned out she’d had good instincts about lawyers. Thank God.
She didn’t listen to Andrew’s message, but she saved it. There would probably be a time soon when she’d crave that soothing voice. She wondered if he even realized that after all the storms she’d weathered lately one of her darkest hours had been the sight of Sully gripping his chest, panting, washing pale. She knew true terror in that moment.
It was amusing to Maggie that her mother thought Sully was such a loser, a simple, laid-back general-store owner, a country boy, an underachiever. Maggie didn’t see him that way at all. Sully was her rock. In fact, he was a rock for a lot of people. He had a strong moral compass, for one thing. He worked hard but he wasn’t a slave to his work, he saw the merits to a balanced life. He was possessed of a country wisdom attained through many years of watching people and learning about human nature. And he was true. He was the most loyal individual on earth. Sully thought Maggie was smart to strive to be as successful as Walter. But Maggie wished she could be more like Sully.
She settled back on the couch and decided to listen to Andrew’s message.
“Maggie, listen, babe, I’m sorry about your crisis with Sully. Is he there with you in Denver? When I get a day I can come up and check on you both...”
“I don’t want to be checked on,” she said to the phone.
“It’s been pretty crazy here or I might’ve heard sooner. I just heard about the bypass a couple of days ago but I was told he was doing great and you were with him so I didn’t jump on the phone.”
“Yeah, why would you do that?”
“And what’s this I hear that you took a vacation? Of indefinite duration? I hope that doesn’t have anything to do with our disagreement. I know you’re probably upset with me, I know that. Honey, I just want what’s best for you and I could tell I wasn’t helping anything. Maybe I made the wrong call but I thought it was probably best if you looked further than me to get support right now. I don’t know anyone who could cope with all you’ve been through any better than you have, but I just felt so helpless, and that wasn’t good for you...”
“I sucked the life out of you, remember?”
“Call me, please. Or email me or something. Let me know what I can do, when we can talk. You know how much I care about you and Sully.”
“Actually, I’m a little murky on that...”
“Maggie?” Sully said from the hall. “Who the devil are you talking to?”
She jumped in surprise. He was wearing his pajamas, his white hair mussed and spiking. “Um...the television?”
“The TV isn’t on,” he said.
“Okay, I was talking back to a message from Andrew. You don’t dump someone and then leave a kind and caring message. Too little, too late.”
“Hmm,” he said, thinking on that for a moment.
“I guess I need a fresh start,” she informed him. “I’d like to go back to eighth grade and redo everything.”
“I think this heart attack business has taken a toll on you,” he said. “I’m sorry about that.”
