What's Left of Me
Page 48
Parker opens the fridge and pulls out a bowl full of cotton candy grapes. Oh my, they are out of this world! Whoever thought to grow hybrid grapes like these is pure genius. Reaching in, I grab a handful and pop one in my mouth.
“How come you don’t have a boyfriend?”
I nearly choke on the grape. “Excuse me?”
“A boyfriend. How come you’re single?”
“How come you’re single?”
“Because my girlfriend left me. Now you.”
Oh shit. Hitting territory I don’t want to go.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not. She did me a favor. How come you don’t have a boyfriend?”
I take a deep breath and let it out. Why don’t I have a boyfriend? Because I got cancer. Adam got scared and couldn’t handle it. He left me. The guys since have just been filler. “He left me.”
“How long ago?”
“How long ago did your girlfriend leave you?” I’m not sure I want to know, but the longer I can keep myself out of this conversation the better.
“A year. You?”
“Why?”
“You.”
What has it been now? I count the years in my head. “Four.”
“Months?”
“Years.”
“You haven’t had a boyfriend in four years?”
I shrug.
“Seriously?”
“Well, I’ve dated and had short relationships every now and then, but nothing serious.”
“Wow. Why?”
“Okay, this is hitting too close for comfort. Change of subject, please.”
“I’m not trying to put you on the spot. I’m in shock. A beautiful woman like you, roaming the streets for four years. I can’t wrap my head around it.”
“I was never roaming the streets.” I laugh.
“Why’d he leave you?”
“Why did she leave you?”
“She wanted to get married.”
Yup, I am really hitting territory I don’t want to go into.
“You didn’t?” Do I want to know this? Yes. No.
“No.”
“That’s harsh.”
“I want to get married. I just … I couldn’t give her what she wanted at the time. She wanted a ring. I was looking into internship programs. I didn’t know where I’d end up. I wanted her with me, by my side, but I didn’t think I needed to give her a ring to prove that to her. When she asked for one, I said I wasn’t ready. I came home the next day to an almost empty apartment.”
“Because you wouldn’t get her a ring?”
“Guess so.” He takes a longer sip of his wine this time.
“I’d be happy with that.”
Parker raises his eyebrows and lowers the glass. “You’d be happy if I didn’t get you a ring?”
“No. I mean, yeah, but not like how you think. I mean …” Why do I always find myself in a hole? “I don’t want to get married. So I, personally, would be thrilled knowing I was with a guy who wasn’t thinking about getting me a ring.”
“You don’t want to get married?”
“Nope.”
“Ever.”
“Ever.”
“Maybe you just haven’t met the right guy.”
“No, that’s not it.”
“Ouch.”
I let out an awkward laugh.
“So, is that why the boyfriend of the small town left you? He wanted to get married, work the farm while you raised the babies?”
“The farm?” Babies?
“Yeah. You said you were from a small town. Isn’t that what people in small towns do? Get married out of high school and have kids?”
“This isn’t the South or 1950. And, no, that’s not why he left me.” I honestly don’t know if that’s what they do in the South.
“Then why?”
Because he was a coward? Ah, that’s not nice. Adam was a great guy. He was just a scared eighteen year old. I don’t blame him. I probably would have left me too.
“We had different plans in life. My plans didn’t match his. He went his separate way. I went mine. I don’t blame him.”
“And, what are your plans in life, Aundrea?”
Stay alive. “Graduate. Travel the world. Spoil my sister’s kids. Enjoy life.”
The oven goes off and I jump.
I watch, sipping my wine, as Parker takes out our pizza. It’s done to perfection. The cheese is golden brown and bubbling from the heat. The smell of Italian spices fills his kitchen. He grabs a pizza cutter and starts cutting it into small squares.
“Where are your plates?” I ask.
“Second cupboard to your left.”
Walking over to the cupboard, I take out two white square plates.
“Here you go.” I hand him our plates, allowing him to dish up some slices. Sitting at his table, I blow on my pizza before taking a bite.
“This is really good.”
“Thanks.”
Swallowing down his second bite, he brings up the one topic I want to run from. Kids.
“You said you want to spoil your sister’s kids. You don’t see yourself having kids?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. I just know she’ll have them before I ever consider it, and when she does, Auntie Aundrea will be right there to spoil them.”
“But kids aren’t out of the question?”
“How come you don’t have a boyfriend?”
I nearly choke on the grape. “Excuse me?”
“A boyfriend. How come you’re single?”
“How come you’re single?”
“Because my girlfriend left me. Now you.”
Oh shit. Hitting territory I don’t want to go.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not. She did me a favor. How come you don’t have a boyfriend?”
I take a deep breath and let it out. Why don’t I have a boyfriend? Because I got cancer. Adam got scared and couldn’t handle it. He left me. The guys since have just been filler. “He left me.”
“How long ago?”
“How long ago did your girlfriend leave you?” I’m not sure I want to know, but the longer I can keep myself out of this conversation the better.
“A year. You?”
“Why?”
“You.”
What has it been now? I count the years in my head. “Four.”
“Months?”
“Years.”
“You haven’t had a boyfriend in four years?”
I shrug.
“Seriously?”
“Well, I’ve dated and had short relationships every now and then, but nothing serious.”
“Wow. Why?”
“Okay, this is hitting too close for comfort. Change of subject, please.”
“I’m not trying to put you on the spot. I’m in shock. A beautiful woman like you, roaming the streets for four years. I can’t wrap my head around it.”
“I was never roaming the streets.” I laugh.
“Why’d he leave you?”
“Why did she leave you?”
“She wanted to get married.”
Yup, I am really hitting territory I don’t want to go into.
“You didn’t?” Do I want to know this? Yes. No.
“No.”
“That’s harsh.”
“I want to get married. I just … I couldn’t give her what she wanted at the time. She wanted a ring. I was looking into internship programs. I didn’t know where I’d end up. I wanted her with me, by my side, but I didn’t think I needed to give her a ring to prove that to her. When she asked for one, I said I wasn’t ready. I came home the next day to an almost empty apartment.”
“Because you wouldn’t get her a ring?”
“Guess so.” He takes a longer sip of his wine this time.
“I’d be happy with that.”
Parker raises his eyebrows and lowers the glass. “You’d be happy if I didn’t get you a ring?”
“No. I mean, yeah, but not like how you think. I mean …” Why do I always find myself in a hole? “I don’t want to get married. So I, personally, would be thrilled knowing I was with a guy who wasn’t thinking about getting me a ring.”
“You don’t want to get married?”
“Nope.”
“Ever.”
“Ever.”
“Maybe you just haven’t met the right guy.”
“No, that’s not it.”
“Ouch.”
I let out an awkward laugh.
“So, is that why the boyfriend of the small town left you? He wanted to get married, work the farm while you raised the babies?”
“The farm?” Babies?
“Yeah. You said you were from a small town. Isn’t that what people in small towns do? Get married out of high school and have kids?”
“This isn’t the South or 1950. And, no, that’s not why he left me.” I honestly don’t know if that’s what they do in the South.
“Then why?”
Because he was a coward? Ah, that’s not nice. Adam was a great guy. He was just a scared eighteen year old. I don’t blame him. I probably would have left me too.
“We had different plans in life. My plans didn’t match his. He went his separate way. I went mine. I don’t blame him.”
“And, what are your plans in life, Aundrea?”
Stay alive. “Graduate. Travel the world. Spoil my sister’s kids. Enjoy life.”
The oven goes off and I jump.
I watch, sipping my wine, as Parker takes out our pizza. It’s done to perfection. The cheese is golden brown and bubbling from the heat. The smell of Italian spices fills his kitchen. He grabs a pizza cutter and starts cutting it into small squares.
“Where are your plates?” I ask.
“Second cupboard to your left.”
Walking over to the cupboard, I take out two white square plates.
“Here you go.” I hand him our plates, allowing him to dish up some slices. Sitting at his table, I blow on my pizza before taking a bite.
“This is really good.”
“Thanks.”
Swallowing down his second bite, he brings up the one topic I want to run from. Kids.
“You said you want to spoil your sister’s kids. You don’t see yourself having kids?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. I just know she’ll have them before I ever consider it, and when she does, Auntie Aundrea will be right there to spoil them.”
“But kids aren’t out of the question?”
