Where We Belong
Page 23
Smiling, Tessa reaches behind her and pulls a photo out of her back pocket, careful of Chase in her arms. “Found this at Mom and Dad’s. Thought you’d like to have it.”
I take the photo from Tessa.
“I’ll be back. Just going to put this stuff inside.” Luke carries both car seats and the duffle up the driveway as I focus on the picture in my hands.
“Holy shit.”
It’s the three of us, Tessa, Mia, and myself, sitting close together on my parent’s back porch, the sun shining down on us and casting our shadows on the cement.
We look young. Really fucking young. I can’t be more than fourteen, fifteen, which would put the two of them close to ten.
Mia in the middle, her and Tessa with their arms over each other’s shoulders and their heads tilted together, both of them with their tongues sticking out and their other hands holding up peace signs.
And me . . . fuck, I’m staring right at her. Right the fuck at her, smiling.
I’m smiling at Mia.
Fuck me.
Tessa nudges her hip against my side. “Look at you. You almost look happy to be sitting within fifty feet of her.”
“Yeah,” I mumble, moving my thumb over the image.
Her face is fuller, and she’s wearing those red, squared-off glasses she always wore back then. The ones I used to tease her relentlessly about. Calling her a nerd and whatever-the-fuck-else I could think of just to get under her skin.
Fucking prick. No wonder she hated me.
A crazy mess of curls frame her face, spilling over her shoulders. Frizzy and unkempt, not like the way Mia wears her hair now, but fuck, it looks sweet on her here. Same with the glasses.
I rub at my jaw, still studying the photo. “I don’t remember this.”
“I don’t either. Mom had a ton of pictures in my old bedroom she was getting ready to organize. This was the only one I found of the three of us together. And the fact that you’re smiling at Mia like you love her . . . well, I pretty much had to take it.”
I look at Tessa, dropping my hand and not saying shit back. Not arguing.
Who the fuck knows why I was smiling at Mia like that. Maybe she said something funny. Maybe her and Tessa were acting like complete fucking idiots and I found it amusing.
Or maybe I just wanted to smile at her a little.
Looking up, I spot Mia walking back over with Luke, who’s got Nolan climbing on his back. Max is slumped on his side in the yard, looking exhausted from five minutes with my son.
I slide the photo into my back pocket. “You don’t want it?” I ask Tessa.
“I made a copy for me,” she says, kissing Chase’s cheek when he starts waking up more and babbling.
“Thanks.”
She smiles.
I look from Chase to her, remembering the conversation I had in the squad car before Mia showed up and got off on my dick.
“You and Luke gonna talk about things while we’re gone?”
Tessa arches her brow, cradling the back of Chase’s head. “Things?”
“Kids.” I bend down, catching her gaze when she tries to lower it, when she tries to avoid this shit like she’s apparently been doing with Luke. “He’s not going anywhere,” I state.
She blinks several times, inhaling a slow, deep breath. “He tell you that?”
“He didn’t have to. I know Luke. Know him better than anyone. If he was worried about something, I’d know it. If he was unsure about you, or didn’t think this was it for him, if he was having even a shred of doubt, he wouldn’t have put that ring on your finger. Talk to him. You’re his wife. If you want kids, if you don’t want kids, whatever. You’ll never know how he feels about it unless you ask him. Quit being scared.”
Her lips pinch closed. She looks away, and I can tell she’s thinking, hopefully absorbing my words.
I think I reach her, penetrate that layer of self-doubt she’s hiding beneath her steely exterior. Maybe give her the assurance she needs to talk this out with Luke. Maybe pissing her off because I’m getting involved.
I don’t get the chance to ask.
Mia joins us, wrapping her arms around Tessa and Chase. “Thank you for doing this for us. I seriously owe you.”
“Anytime.” Tessa jerks her head when Mia releases her and steps over a little. “Come here.”
The two of them move behind the truck, talking all close and whispering with each other.
Discussing Luke? Fucking probably. I’m sure Tessa is getting on Mia for the shit I just said to her, telling me to mind my own business.
Christ. I’m only trying to help.
While they share their own private whatever-the-fuck moment, I say my goodbyes to Nolan, hugging him and making sure he remembers to listen to Luke and Tessa.
He couldn’t be more excited about spending the night here. Luke has already promised him rides on his four-wheeler around the yard.
I remind him of his bedtime, which draws a funny look from Luke.
“You just told me you were allowed to stay up until ten, dude.”
Nolan looks down at his feet. “Well, sometimes I can.” He kicks a pebble. “Like, on special nights. This is special.”
Luke pins his arms against his chest, shaking his head and huffing a sharp breath. “Everything he tells me he can do, I’m calling you to verify. I’m just going to go ahead and assume soda is a no, since he just told me he can have it.”
Laughing, I rustle Nolan’s hair, straightening up when the girls walk back over.
“Ready to go?” Mia asks, bouncing on her feet and looking so damn happy.
“Been ready.”
I watch her give Nolan and Chase another fifty hugs and kisses, then another after I almost get her in the truck. The second her ass hits the seat she’s jumping down again and pushing past me, mumbling something about already forgetting what they smell like.
“Mia, baby, it’s two days. I’m not even taking you out of the state.”
I grip the door, watching her press kisses all over Chase’s face like she’s doing it for the last time.
“I know. I just miss them already,” she mumbles against his cheek. She dashes over to Nolan and pulls him into another hug.
He’s ready to get his time started with Luke and begins squirming the second her arms wrap around him.
“Mommy!”
“Okay, okay. I’m going.” After blowing him a kiss, she spins around and climbs up into the truck, securing her seatbelt quickly. “Close the door before I get out again,” she says, rolling her eyes at herself.
I back us out of the driveway and get us halfway down the street before Mia is training her eyes ahead of her, prying them off of the figures growing smaller in my rearview mirror.
“You okay?” I ask, dialing down the volume on the radio, keeping one hand on the wheel and my eyes on the road. “I know this is our first time leaving them overnight. And with Chase being little . . . Fuck, is it too soon? I just wanted . . .”
My brain turns off the second Mia’s hand brushes against the front of my shorts.
“Baby,” I breathe, dropping my head against the seat as she unhooks her belt and slides closer, pressing her tits against my arm and her mouth against my neck, her hand rubbing my hard-on until I’m straining against the zipper and threatening to rip that shit right open.
I take the photo from Tessa.
“I’ll be back. Just going to put this stuff inside.” Luke carries both car seats and the duffle up the driveway as I focus on the picture in my hands.
“Holy shit.”
It’s the three of us, Tessa, Mia, and myself, sitting close together on my parent’s back porch, the sun shining down on us and casting our shadows on the cement.
We look young. Really fucking young. I can’t be more than fourteen, fifteen, which would put the two of them close to ten.
Mia in the middle, her and Tessa with their arms over each other’s shoulders and their heads tilted together, both of them with their tongues sticking out and their other hands holding up peace signs.
And me . . . fuck, I’m staring right at her. Right the fuck at her, smiling.
I’m smiling at Mia.
Fuck me.
Tessa nudges her hip against my side. “Look at you. You almost look happy to be sitting within fifty feet of her.”
“Yeah,” I mumble, moving my thumb over the image.
Her face is fuller, and she’s wearing those red, squared-off glasses she always wore back then. The ones I used to tease her relentlessly about. Calling her a nerd and whatever-the-fuck-else I could think of just to get under her skin.
Fucking prick. No wonder she hated me.
A crazy mess of curls frame her face, spilling over her shoulders. Frizzy and unkempt, not like the way Mia wears her hair now, but fuck, it looks sweet on her here. Same with the glasses.
I rub at my jaw, still studying the photo. “I don’t remember this.”
“I don’t either. Mom had a ton of pictures in my old bedroom she was getting ready to organize. This was the only one I found of the three of us together. And the fact that you’re smiling at Mia like you love her . . . well, I pretty much had to take it.”
I look at Tessa, dropping my hand and not saying shit back. Not arguing.
Who the fuck knows why I was smiling at Mia like that. Maybe she said something funny. Maybe her and Tessa were acting like complete fucking idiots and I found it amusing.
Or maybe I just wanted to smile at her a little.
Looking up, I spot Mia walking back over with Luke, who’s got Nolan climbing on his back. Max is slumped on his side in the yard, looking exhausted from five minutes with my son.
I slide the photo into my back pocket. “You don’t want it?” I ask Tessa.
“I made a copy for me,” she says, kissing Chase’s cheek when he starts waking up more and babbling.
“Thanks.”
She smiles.
I look from Chase to her, remembering the conversation I had in the squad car before Mia showed up and got off on my dick.
“You and Luke gonna talk about things while we’re gone?”
Tessa arches her brow, cradling the back of Chase’s head. “Things?”
“Kids.” I bend down, catching her gaze when she tries to lower it, when she tries to avoid this shit like she’s apparently been doing with Luke. “He’s not going anywhere,” I state.
She blinks several times, inhaling a slow, deep breath. “He tell you that?”
“He didn’t have to. I know Luke. Know him better than anyone. If he was worried about something, I’d know it. If he was unsure about you, or didn’t think this was it for him, if he was having even a shred of doubt, he wouldn’t have put that ring on your finger. Talk to him. You’re his wife. If you want kids, if you don’t want kids, whatever. You’ll never know how he feels about it unless you ask him. Quit being scared.”
Her lips pinch closed. She looks away, and I can tell she’s thinking, hopefully absorbing my words.
I think I reach her, penetrate that layer of self-doubt she’s hiding beneath her steely exterior. Maybe give her the assurance she needs to talk this out with Luke. Maybe pissing her off because I’m getting involved.
I don’t get the chance to ask.
Mia joins us, wrapping her arms around Tessa and Chase. “Thank you for doing this for us. I seriously owe you.”
“Anytime.” Tessa jerks her head when Mia releases her and steps over a little. “Come here.”
The two of them move behind the truck, talking all close and whispering with each other.
Discussing Luke? Fucking probably. I’m sure Tessa is getting on Mia for the shit I just said to her, telling me to mind my own business.
Christ. I’m only trying to help.
While they share their own private whatever-the-fuck moment, I say my goodbyes to Nolan, hugging him and making sure he remembers to listen to Luke and Tessa.
He couldn’t be more excited about spending the night here. Luke has already promised him rides on his four-wheeler around the yard.
I remind him of his bedtime, which draws a funny look from Luke.
“You just told me you were allowed to stay up until ten, dude.”
Nolan looks down at his feet. “Well, sometimes I can.” He kicks a pebble. “Like, on special nights. This is special.”
Luke pins his arms against his chest, shaking his head and huffing a sharp breath. “Everything he tells me he can do, I’m calling you to verify. I’m just going to go ahead and assume soda is a no, since he just told me he can have it.”
Laughing, I rustle Nolan’s hair, straightening up when the girls walk back over.
“Ready to go?” Mia asks, bouncing on her feet and looking so damn happy.
“Been ready.”
I watch her give Nolan and Chase another fifty hugs and kisses, then another after I almost get her in the truck. The second her ass hits the seat she’s jumping down again and pushing past me, mumbling something about already forgetting what they smell like.
“Mia, baby, it’s two days. I’m not even taking you out of the state.”
I grip the door, watching her press kisses all over Chase’s face like she’s doing it for the last time.
“I know. I just miss them already,” she mumbles against his cheek. She dashes over to Nolan and pulls him into another hug.
He’s ready to get his time started with Luke and begins squirming the second her arms wrap around him.
“Mommy!”
“Okay, okay. I’m going.” After blowing him a kiss, she spins around and climbs up into the truck, securing her seatbelt quickly. “Close the door before I get out again,” she says, rolling her eyes at herself.
I back us out of the driveway and get us halfway down the street before Mia is training her eyes ahead of her, prying them off of the figures growing smaller in my rearview mirror.
“You okay?” I ask, dialing down the volume on the radio, keeping one hand on the wheel and my eyes on the road. “I know this is our first time leaving them overnight. And with Chase being little . . . Fuck, is it too soon? I just wanted . . .”
My brain turns off the second Mia’s hand brushes against the front of my shorts.
“Baby,” I breathe, dropping my head against the seat as she unhooks her belt and slides closer, pressing her tits against my arm and her mouth against my neck, her hand rubbing my hard-on until I’m straining against the zipper and threatening to rip that shit right open.
