Wicked White
Page 50
I’m not sure if he’s looking for me to actually answer as he processes the situation for himself. Ace stands and stares up at the ceiling like he’s trying to wrap his head around what’s happened while he keeps repeating the word no over and over.
I reach down and press two fingers to Jeremy’s throat. “He’s still breathing, but he’s in bad shape. He’s going to need—”
Sirens scream in the far-off distance, causing the blood in my veins to run ice-cold. If Ace gets caught . . . I shake my head, not even wanting to think about it if that happens.
I stare up at Ace’s conflicted face and press my lips to his. “Go.”
His brow furrows as he stands over me. “Iris, I can’t leave you.”
“If you don’t go now, things are going to get so much worse for you. You have to get out of here and let me handle this. You have to go before . . .” I find myself getting choked up as I implore the man I desperately love to leave me. “Just, please, Ace. Go.”
“Iris . . . I won’t—”
“Go!” I shout again.
He shakes his head. “No! Not without you.”
“Get out of here!” I can see now that he’s not going to listen to me, so I stand up and shove my hands into his chest as hard as I can. “Leave!”
He furrows his brow. “Why are you doing this? Don’t push me away.”
It’s in that moment I do something I instantly wish I can take back. I lie. I lie to protect him in the only way I know that will convince him to leave me.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath to harden my face before redirecting my gaze on him. “I’m not going with you, Ace. I don’t even really know you.”
Hurt etches into his beautiful features, and it pains me to know that I’m causing him pain, but I know I need to do this for his own good.
“But you promised,” he whispers.
“How can I ever trust that you won’t lash out at me? You’ve obviously got issues. I can’t give up my life for someone that I don’t trust not to take their anger out on me someday.” Tears run down my cheeks as I know the words I’m telling him are cutting like a knife, but it’s the only way I know that will make him leave—that will ultimately keep him safe for now. I can’t bear the thought of him being hauled out of here in handcuffs.
“Iris . . . this looks bad, I know, but I would never . . .” He swallows and closes his eyes like it hurts too much to even look at me. “I would never hurt you.”
I take a deep breath, fighting back the urge to break down and say to hell with everything and run away with him anyway. I don’t want to hurt him, but what choice do I have?
I square my shoulders and stare into his eyes. “I don’t want to be with you.”
He pauses for a beat and tears run down his face. “This changes things,” he whispers. “If you don’t want me, I’ll go. I’ll leave you like you’re asking, but just remember, you did this. You tore us apart. I never wanted to be without you, and I would take my own life before I laid a finger on you. I don’t know how you would believe I would do anything to you other than give you the world.”
I choke back a sob and force a stern face, fearing if he doesn’t go soon, I won’t be able to pretend like this isn’t absolutely gutting me. “Go!”
Ace doesn’t immediately run off like I expect. Instead he leans in and kisses my forehead and murmurs, “I’ll love you forever.”
Then he turns his back to me and runs out the door, not giving me a chance to break down and beg him to stay.
The engine of his bike roars to life moments later, and I close my eyes, knowing that the man I love has just ridden out of my life as quickly as he came into it.
I collapse onto the floor, tears streaming freely as the realization hits me that I might not ever see Ace again after this. I don’t want this to be the end of us. One day, I’ll have to find him and explain—beg for his forgiveness for the hurtful lies I told him in order to keep him safe.
When the cops show up I’m curled into a ball, sobbing, next to a still-breathing but unconscious Jeremy. I didn’t have the strength to move as my heart shattered into a million pieces.
“Miss? Miss, are you hurt?” I blink slowly a few times and then turn my gaze up at the young, dark-haired police officer leaning over me. “Can you tell me who did this to you?”
“Easy there,” he says as I push myself up onto my elbow, and the officer places his hands on my shoulders, like I’m a broken flower.
“Tell me, miss, who did this, so we can go after them,” he says again, but I shake my head, causing him to furrow his brow. “You don’t know who did it?”
Jeremy’s groan behind me pulls my attention to where the paramedics have somehow revived him and are busying themselves with checking him over.
“Where is that fucker?” Jeremy mumbles, and I cringe, knowing immediately that he obviously didn’t get hit hard enough to forget that Ace was here.
The cop turns his attention away from me to Jeremy. “Who did this to you, sir?”
“That asshole, Ace. He lives in the trailer next to the office. He broke in here and attacked me.”
The cop writes down some information on a notepad. “Do you know his last name?”
“Fuck no,” Jeremy mutters as the medic helps him sit up before cleaning the lacerations above his eye.
I reach down and press two fingers to Jeremy’s throat. “He’s still breathing, but he’s in bad shape. He’s going to need—”
Sirens scream in the far-off distance, causing the blood in my veins to run ice-cold. If Ace gets caught . . . I shake my head, not even wanting to think about it if that happens.
I stare up at Ace’s conflicted face and press my lips to his. “Go.”
His brow furrows as he stands over me. “Iris, I can’t leave you.”
“If you don’t go now, things are going to get so much worse for you. You have to get out of here and let me handle this. You have to go before . . .” I find myself getting choked up as I implore the man I desperately love to leave me. “Just, please, Ace. Go.”
“Iris . . . I won’t—”
“Go!” I shout again.
He shakes his head. “No! Not without you.”
“Get out of here!” I can see now that he’s not going to listen to me, so I stand up and shove my hands into his chest as hard as I can. “Leave!”
He furrows his brow. “Why are you doing this? Don’t push me away.”
It’s in that moment I do something I instantly wish I can take back. I lie. I lie to protect him in the only way I know that will convince him to leave me.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath to harden my face before redirecting my gaze on him. “I’m not going with you, Ace. I don’t even really know you.”
Hurt etches into his beautiful features, and it pains me to know that I’m causing him pain, but I know I need to do this for his own good.
“But you promised,” he whispers.
“How can I ever trust that you won’t lash out at me? You’ve obviously got issues. I can’t give up my life for someone that I don’t trust not to take their anger out on me someday.” Tears run down my cheeks as I know the words I’m telling him are cutting like a knife, but it’s the only way I know that will make him leave—that will ultimately keep him safe for now. I can’t bear the thought of him being hauled out of here in handcuffs.
“Iris . . . this looks bad, I know, but I would never . . .” He swallows and closes his eyes like it hurts too much to even look at me. “I would never hurt you.”
I take a deep breath, fighting back the urge to break down and say to hell with everything and run away with him anyway. I don’t want to hurt him, but what choice do I have?
I square my shoulders and stare into his eyes. “I don’t want to be with you.”
He pauses for a beat and tears run down his face. “This changes things,” he whispers. “If you don’t want me, I’ll go. I’ll leave you like you’re asking, but just remember, you did this. You tore us apart. I never wanted to be without you, and I would take my own life before I laid a finger on you. I don’t know how you would believe I would do anything to you other than give you the world.”
I choke back a sob and force a stern face, fearing if he doesn’t go soon, I won’t be able to pretend like this isn’t absolutely gutting me. “Go!”
Ace doesn’t immediately run off like I expect. Instead he leans in and kisses my forehead and murmurs, “I’ll love you forever.”
Then he turns his back to me and runs out the door, not giving me a chance to break down and beg him to stay.
The engine of his bike roars to life moments later, and I close my eyes, knowing that the man I love has just ridden out of my life as quickly as he came into it.
I collapse onto the floor, tears streaming freely as the realization hits me that I might not ever see Ace again after this. I don’t want this to be the end of us. One day, I’ll have to find him and explain—beg for his forgiveness for the hurtful lies I told him in order to keep him safe.
When the cops show up I’m curled into a ball, sobbing, next to a still-breathing but unconscious Jeremy. I didn’t have the strength to move as my heart shattered into a million pieces.
“Miss? Miss, are you hurt?” I blink slowly a few times and then turn my gaze up at the young, dark-haired police officer leaning over me. “Can you tell me who did this to you?”
“Easy there,” he says as I push myself up onto my elbow, and the officer places his hands on my shoulders, like I’m a broken flower.
“Tell me, miss, who did this, so we can go after them,” he says again, but I shake my head, causing him to furrow his brow. “You don’t know who did it?”
Jeremy’s groan behind me pulls my attention to where the paramedics have somehow revived him and are busying themselves with checking him over.
“Where is that fucker?” Jeremy mumbles, and I cringe, knowing immediately that he obviously didn’t get hit hard enough to forget that Ace was here.
The cop turns his attention away from me to Jeremy. “Who did this to you, sir?”
“That asshole, Ace. He lives in the trailer next to the office. He broke in here and attacked me.”
The cop writes down some information on a notepad. “Do you know his last name?”
“Fuck no,” Jeremy mutters as the medic helps him sit up before cleaning the lacerations above his eye.