Willing Sacrifice
Page 14
Her gaze drifted past him, growing distant. “I’ve often wondered if I had a child before Brenya saved me. I keep seeing the face of a little boy in my dreams.”
Torr guessed it was her stepbrother she saw. Blake. They’d been close, but he couldn’t tell her that without revealing that he had known her in her old life. Doing that would come too close to breaking his vow to Brenya. Instead, he settled for, “How old was he?”
“Nine or ten.”
“How old are you?”
“I don’t know.”
Torr did. She was twenty-eight now, after her years here. “You’re still young. You would have had to have been pregnant as a child to have a son that old. I’m sure he’s just someone you were close to.”
“A brother?”
“Possibly,” he said, hedging. “If you regain your memories, I’m sure you’ll be able to find him.”
“Do you think he’s looking for me?”
“Anyone who lost you would never stop looking for you, never stop trying to get you back, never stop wondering if you were safe and happy.”
A sad smile shaped her mouth. The last time he’d touched it had been the time he’d had to breathe for her. He’d wished his lips had been on hers for any other reason but to force air into her lungs. She’d been so frail then. At death’s door. He’d known it might be the last time he would ever see her, and yet here she was, safe and so beautiful it made his chest ache.
“You’re sweet,” she told him. “If all men are like you, it’s no wonder Brenya keeps them away. None of us would ever get any work done.”
“Brenya would be smarter to bring more men like me here to keep you all safe.”
“If you’re going to keep anyone safe, you’ll need to eat something. Let’s get you some food and I’ll see if we have any clothes that might fit.”
He fell in line behind her as she started walking toward the cluster of huts around the Sentinel Stone. “Are you saying you don’t like me running around half naked?”
“I try not to lie, so I won’t say that, but it is distracting. The girls all want to touch you, which I have to admit I don’t like.”
Jealousy? He couldn’t be sure. What he was sure of was that he’d wear pink stockings and a clown wig if it made Grace happy. “We can’t have that. I bruise easily.”
She glanced at him over her shoulder, her eyebrows raised. “I don’t believe that, not after seeing how fast you heal. You barely needed more than to have the blood cleaned away.”
“Fast healing comes with the job.”
“What job is that?”
“Getting beaten to a pulp all the time.”
“Well, I hope you’re good at it. If we’re going after those things in the woods, you’re going to need to be an expert.”
“We’re not going after them. I am.”
“You won’t find them without my help. Even Brenya agreed I needed to go along, and she doesn’t want me anywhere near danger.”
“You can just point the way.”
Grace stopped so suddenly he nearly ran into her. Her chin was set in a way he recognized—one that said she was going to get her way.
In that instant, he remembered how she’d gotten him to start eating again after he’d decided to starve to death. None of his brothers would kill him and free him from the prison his body had created. He was paralyzed, and all the Sanguinar around were pouring all of their energy into trying to heal him. Nothing had worked, and he’d become nothing but a drain on the people he loved.
Joseph, his leader, had refused to let him meet an honorable death, so Torr had taken the decision out of his hands. No one could force him to eat. It was the only thing he had left that he controlled.
And then Grace had come to him, so sweetly coaxing, offering to remove one item of clothing for every bite he took. The temptation had been more than he could resist. She’d fed him and made him hunger all at the same time.
He’d found his honor before she’d stripped herself bare, but it had been a close call. Even now he could remember just how she looked with only her bra covering her full breasts. His body had been unable to respond at the time, but it was more than able now. He had to clasp his hands in front of his groin to keep her from seeing what she did to him.
She didn’t raise her voice. There was no heat in her tone, but that made it no less final. “I’m going with you. We all follow Brenya’s orders here. Even you. And she ordered me to show you where I saw the Hunters.”
“And if I refuse?”
“Then I’ll just have to find a way to change your mind.”
Just as she had with him starving himself.
If she started taking off clothes now, he was sure he wouldn’t be enough of a man to stop her. He’d wanted her for too long, and having her close again was almost too good to believe. Touching her—taking her—would definitely go a long way toward convincing him that this was all real and not some beautiful dream.
Torr cleared his throat to keep a squeak from his voice. “Are you saying I should just give in?”
“I’m saying I’ll meet you by the well after you’re finished eating. Don’t leave without me.”
Clearly her mind was made up. And he was supposed to earn her trust somehow. He couldn’t do that from a distance, so Grace would go with him. But as soon as she showed him where to find the Hunters, he was bringing her right back. No way was he putting his sweet Grace in danger for one second longer than necessary.
• • •
Grace led Torr through the woods, relieved that his body was now covered. At least that’s what she tried to tell herself.
Not that what she’d been able to find could really count as him being covered. She’d had to cut the sleeves off of a loose shirt that one of the larger women wore. After she sliced open the front to make room for the width of his shoulders and ribs, the shirt was more of a vest. It did nothing to hide his arms and little to hide his chest. Every time he walked, the edges parted, revealing that tantalizing image of the tree and the flashing, iridescent necklace.
“What is that picture you wear?” she finally asked as she led the way to the area where she’d been collecting herbs yesterday.
“It’s called a lifemark.”
Torr guessed it was her stepbrother she saw. Blake. They’d been close, but he couldn’t tell her that without revealing that he had known her in her old life. Doing that would come too close to breaking his vow to Brenya. Instead, he settled for, “How old was he?”
“Nine or ten.”
“How old are you?”
“I don’t know.”
Torr did. She was twenty-eight now, after her years here. “You’re still young. You would have had to have been pregnant as a child to have a son that old. I’m sure he’s just someone you were close to.”
“A brother?”
“Possibly,” he said, hedging. “If you regain your memories, I’m sure you’ll be able to find him.”
“Do you think he’s looking for me?”
“Anyone who lost you would never stop looking for you, never stop trying to get you back, never stop wondering if you were safe and happy.”
A sad smile shaped her mouth. The last time he’d touched it had been the time he’d had to breathe for her. He’d wished his lips had been on hers for any other reason but to force air into her lungs. She’d been so frail then. At death’s door. He’d known it might be the last time he would ever see her, and yet here she was, safe and so beautiful it made his chest ache.
“You’re sweet,” she told him. “If all men are like you, it’s no wonder Brenya keeps them away. None of us would ever get any work done.”
“Brenya would be smarter to bring more men like me here to keep you all safe.”
“If you’re going to keep anyone safe, you’ll need to eat something. Let’s get you some food and I’ll see if we have any clothes that might fit.”
He fell in line behind her as she started walking toward the cluster of huts around the Sentinel Stone. “Are you saying you don’t like me running around half naked?”
“I try not to lie, so I won’t say that, but it is distracting. The girls all want to touch you, which I have to admit I don’t like.”
Jealousy? He couldn’t be sure. What he was sure of was that he’d wear pink stockings and a clown wig if it made Grace happy. “We can’t have that. I bruise easily.”
She glanced at him over her shoulder, her eyebrows raised. “I don’t believe that, not after seeing how fast you heal. You barely needed more than to have the blood cleaned away.”
“Fast healing comes with the job.”
“What job is that?”
“Getting beaten to a pulp all the time.”
“Well, I hope you’re good at it. If we’re going after those things in the woods, you’re going to need to be an expert.”
“We’re not going after them. I am.”
“You won’t find them without my help. Even Brenya agreed I needed to go along, and she doesn’t want me anywhere near danger.”
“You can just point the way.”
Grace stopped so suddenly he nearly ran into her. Her chin was set in a way he recognized—one that said she was going to get her way.
In that instant, he remembered how she’d gotten him to start eating again after he’d decided to starve to death. None of his brothers would kill him and free him from the prison his body had created. He was paralyzed, and all the Sanguinar around were pouring all of their energy into trying to heal him. Nothing had worked, and he’d become nothing but a drain on the people he loved.
Joseph, his leader, had refused to let him meet an honorable death, so Torr had taken the decision out of his hands. No one could force him to eat. It was the only thing he had left that he controlled.
And then Grace had come to him, so sweetly coaxing, offering to remove one item of clothing for every bite he took. The temptation had been more than he could resist. She’d fed him and made him hunger all at the same time.
He’d found his honor before she’d stripped herself bare, but it had been a close call. Even now he could remember just how she looked with only her bra covering her full breasts. His body had been unable to respond at the time, but it was more than able now. He had to clasp his hands in front of his groin to keep her from seeing what she did to him.
She didn’t raise her voice. There was no heat in her tone, but that made it no less final. “I’m going with you. We all follow Brenya’s orders here. Even you. And she ordered me to show you where I saw the Hunters.”
“And if I refuse?”
“Then I’ll just have to find a way to change your mind.”
Just as she had with him starving himself.
If she started taking off clothes now, he was sure he wouldn’t be enough of a man to stop her. He’d wanted her for too long, and having her close again was almost too good to believe. Touching her—taking her—would definitely go a long way toward convincing him that this was all real and not some beautiful dream.
Torr cleared his throat to keep a squeak from his voice. “Are you saying I should just give in?”
“I’m saying I’ll meet you by the well after you’re finished eating. Don’t leave without me.”
Clearly her mind was made up. And he was supposed to earn her trust somehow. He couldn’t do that from a distance, so Grace would go with him. But as soon as she showed him where to find the Hunters, he was bringing her right back. No way was he putting his sweet Grace in danger for one second longer than necessary.
• • •
Grace led Torr through the woods, relieved that his body was now covered. At least that’s what she tried to tell herself.
Not that what she’d been able to find could really count as him being covered. She’d had to cut the sleeves off of a loose shirt that one of the larger women wore. After she sliced open the front to make room for the width of his shoulders and ribs, the shirt was more of a vest. It did nothing to hide his arms and little to hide his chest. Every time he walked, the edges parted, revealing that tantalizing image of the tree and the flashing, iridescent necklace.
“What is that picture you wear?” she finally asked as she led the way to the area where she’d been collecting herbs yesterday.
“It’s called a lifemark.”
