A Second Chance
Page 44
“I’m going to miss you, Mommy.”
“I know. I’ll be home in a week. And I’ll have a tan and I’ll feel so much better, baby.”
Clara looked up at her. The apples of her cheeks were pink, and her eyes were soft. “Will you send us a postcard?”
“You bet I will. I’ll bring you home something very special. I promise.”
Clara nodded and hugged her mother one more time before running up the back stairs and into the house.
Madeline turned around and saw Eduardo lingering at the trunk, slowing pulling his backpack out. He slammed down the door and stood there.
She let out a breath and walked to him. “I’m sorry this is upsetting you. I need to do this.”
“I just think it’s dumb.”
“Ed.” She laid her hand on his shoulder. “I can’t watch him marry someone else.”
“Why? You did it.”
“You’re right. I did.” Embarrassment and anger stirred inside of her. She’d done just that, she’d moved on right away, and it had never felt right. There was only one thing she could say to her son. She had to come clean on why she wouldn’t be there. “Ed, you have to understand. I can’t even tell you anymore why your father and I got divorced. I don’t remember. It just happened. Everything just got so hard, and we didn’t handle it too well. Matt and I grew closer, and when he asked me to marry him, I said yes. I never loved him like I loved your father.”
“Well, the two of you should have worked harder.”
“Be that as it may, we didn’t.”
“He was miserable while you were married to Matt.”
“I know. I’ve been told.” Guilt stirred in with the embarrassment and anger, and nausea was washing over her.
“Well, you should at least support him.”
“I do support him.” She knew she had been the one to push him right into Kathy’s waiting and wanting arms. Had she not opened her big mouth, perhaps he wouldn’t be getting married tomorrow. There was nothing she could do about it now.
She lifted her hand to Eduardo’s cheek. He was old enough to understand. “Ed, I love him. I want him happy. Kathy makes him happy.”
“Mom…”
“No, don’t say anything else. I can’t watch the man I love marry someone else.” She shook her head, trying to ward off the tears that stung her eyes. “I need you to support me on this. I need you to understand.”
She knew he wouldn’t accept it, but he wouldn’t say anything to Carlos and Kathy either.
He gave her a quick hug. “Have fun.” He turned from her and headed into the house.
She’d hoped to make a clean exit without having to see anyone, but when she looked back at the door that Eduardo had just walked through, Kathy stood there smiling.
“I’m sorry you won’t be staying for the wedding.”
Madeline tried to keep her shoulders down and look less tense than she felt. “Timing was just right for the trip. My boss gave me some extra vacation. I certainly think I deserve it.”
“Oh, yes, you do,” Kathy said, walking down the back steps toward her.
Suddenly the ring she was wearing around her neck felt heavy. She hoped it was tucked under the edge of her shirt. Damn, she’d meant to take it off.
Madeline cleared her throat. “Everything is set? Last-minute jitters?”
“Like crazy,” Kathy admitted and let out a quick breath and put her hand on her chest. “I don’t think I’ve ever been so nervous in all of my life.”
“You’ll be fine.” Madeline’s legs were becoming weak beneath her and she clenched her hands at her side to keep Kathy from seeing them shake. “You’re getting a wonderful husband.”
“Thank you. That means the world coming from you.” Kathy turned and looked toward the house. “Why don’t you come in.”
“Oh, no. That’s not necessary. I have to get to the airport,” she said, but Carlos walked down the back steps toward them.
“Did she have any luck convincing you to stay for the wedding?” he asked Madeline, lacing his arm around Kathy’s waist.
“No.” As painful as it was to watch him put his arm around Kathy, she was sure her heart would actually burst if she stayed for the wedding. “I leave in four hours. Sun, sand, and water await me.”
Kathy’s sister opened the back door. “Kathy, you have a phone call,” she shouted from the back door, waving the cordless phone in her hand.
“Have a great time,” Kathy said, smiling, then she ran up the steps toward the house and disappeared inside.
“Well. I’d better be going.” She turned back toward the car and lifted the handle.
Carlos touched her arm. “Please reconsider.”
She could feel the tears stinging her eyes. She wouldn’t shed them. She’d promised herself she wouldn’t.
“I have to go.”
“I want you here.” His voice was quiet. “You’re very important to me.”
“Carlos, I was important to you.” She watched him wince and she hated that he was hurt by her refusal to attend his wedding, but she couldn’t help it. This wasn’t the place for her. “I will always be part of your life because I am the mother of your children. But I can’t watch you get married.”
He closed his eyes and let out a breath. He took a step closer to her, still holding her arm, and opened his eyes. His dark eyes peered into hers, and in them she saw panic, just as she’d seen when she told him she was pregnant the first time. Once she’d have kissed it away, but he wasn’t hers anymore.
Carlos looked at the door and then back at her. “Am I doing the right thing?”
“Why are you asking me?”
“Because I need to know it’s really over between you and me. Marrying someone else makes that very final.”
Madeline swallowed hard. “Yes. It’s the right thing.” She looked at her bag in the seat and thought of the money she’d spent on the airline tickets. She considered what awaited her if she did go, and what was in store if she didn’t. “I have to go. Get married to Kathy tomorrow. Be happy, Carlos. Be happy.”
She moved in to kiss him on the cheek, but he turned just slightly and their lips met. As her mouth lingered on his, the moment felt longer than it really could have been. Carlos moved away first, and her heart broke in two.
“I know. I’ll be home in a week. And I’ll have a tan and I’ll feel so much better, baby.”
Clara looked up at her. The apples of her cheeks were pink, and her eyes were soft. “Will you send us a postcard?”
“You bet I will. I’ll bring you home something very special. I promise.”
Clara nodded and hugged her mother one more time before running up the back stairs and into the house.
Madeline turned around and saw Eduardo lingering at the trunk, slowing pulling his backpack out. He slammed down the door and stood there.
She let out a breath and walked to him. “I’m sorry this is upsetting you. I need to do this.”
“I just think it’s dumb.”
“Ed.” She laid her hand on his shoulder. “I can’t watch him marry someone else.”
“Why? You did it.”
“You’re right. I did.” Embarrassment and anger stirred inside of her. She’d done just that, she’d moved on right away, and it had never felt right. There was only one thing she could say to her son. She had to come clean on why she wouldn’t be there. “Ed, you have to understand. I can’t even tell you anymore why your father and I got divorced. I don’t remember. It just happened. Everything just got so hard, and we didn’t handle it too well. Matt and I grew closer, and when he asked me to marry him, I said yes. I never loved him like I loved your father.”
“Well, the two of you should have worked harder.”
“Be that as it may, we didn’t.”
“He was miserable while you were married to Matt.”
“I know. I’ve been told.” Guilt stirred in with the embarrassment and anger, and nausea was washing over her.
“Well, you should at least support him.”
“I do support him.” She knew she had been the one to push him right into Kathy’s waiting and wanting arms. Had she not opened her big mouth, perhaps he wouldn’t be getting married tomorrow. There was nothing she could do about it now.
She lifted her hand to Eduardo’s cheek. He was old enough to understand. “Ed, I love him. I want him happy. Kathy makes him happy.”
“Mom…”
“No, don’t say anything else. I can’t watch the man I love marry someone else.” She shook her head, trying to ward off the tears that stung her eyes. “I need you to support me on this. I need you to understand.”
She knew he wouldn’t accept it, but he wouldn’t say anything to Carlos and Kathy either.
He gave her a quick hug. “Have fun.” He turned from her and headed into the house.
She’d hoped to make a clean exit without having to see anyone, but when she looked back at the door that Eduardo had just walked through, Kathy stood there smiling.
“I’m sorry you won’t be staying for the wedding.”
Madeline tried to keep her shoulders down and look less tense than she felt. “Timing was just right for the trip. My boss gave me some extra vacation. I certainly think I deserve it.”
“Oh, yes, you do,” Kathy said, walking down the back steps toward her.
Suddenly the ring she was wearing around her neck felt heavy. She hoped it was tucked under the edge of her shirt. Damn, she’d meant to take it off.
Madeline cleared her throat. “Everything is set? Last-minute jitters?”
“Like crazy,” Kathy admitted and let out a quick breath and put her hand on her chest. “I don’t think I’ve ever been so nervous in all of my life.”
“You’ll be fine.” Madeline’s legs were becoming weak beneath her and she clenched her hands at her side to keep Kathy from seeing them shake. “You’re getting a wonderful husband.”
“Thank you. That means the world coming from you.” Kathy turned and looked toward the house. “Why don’t you come in.”
“Oh, no. That’s not necessary. I have to get to the airport,” she said, but Carlos walked down the back steps toward them.
“Did she have any luck convincing you to stay for the wedding?” he asked Madeline, lacing his arm around Kathy’s waist.
“No.” As painful as it was to watch him put his arm around Kathy, she was sure her heart would actually burst if she stayed for the wedding. “I leave in four hours. Sun, sand, and water await me.”
Kathy’s sister opened the back door. “Kathy, you have a phone call,” she shouted from the back door, waving the cordless phone in her hand.
“Have a great time,” Kathy said, smiling, then she ran up the steps toward the house and disappeared inside.
“Well. I’d better be going.” She turned back toward the car and lifted the handle.
Carlos touched her arm. “Please reconsider.”
She could feel the tears stinging her eyes. She wouldn’t shed them. She’d promised herself she wouldn’t.
“I have to go.”
“I want you here.” His voice was quiet. “You’re very important to me.”
“Carlos, I was important to you.” She watched him wince and she hated that he was hurt by her refusal to attend his wedding, but she couldn’t help it. This wasn’t the place for her. “I will always be part of your life because I am the mother of your children. But I can’t watch you get married.”
He closed his eyes and let out a breath. He took a step closer to her, still holding her arm, and opened his eyes. His dark eyes peered into hers, and in them she saw panic, just as she’d seen when she told him she was pregnant the first time. Once she’d have kissed it away, but he wasn’t hers anymore.
Carlos looked at the door and then back at her. “Am I doing the right thing?”
“Why are you asking me?”
“Because I need to know it’s really over between you and me. Marrying someone else makes that very final.”
Madeline swallowed hard. “Yes. It’s the right thing.” She looked at her bag in the seat and thought of the money she’d spent on the airline tickets. She considered what awaited her if she did go, and what was in store if she didn’t. “I have to go. Get married to Kathy tomorrow. Be happy, Carlos. Be happy.”
She moved in to kiss him on the cheek, but he turned just slightly and their lips met. As her mouth lingered on his, the moment felt longer than it really could have been. Carlos moved away first, and her heart broke in two.
