Almost Perfect
Page 19
Montana’s mouth twitched. “You went snooping.”
“Not my finest moment, but yes. There were some notes on his desk and I read them.”
“It wasn’t very good?” Montana asked sympathetically.
“Worse. It wasn’t his. He’d stolen my idea. Unlike him, I do talk about my stories. I can be tedious and annoying about it. It’s how I work through problems before I start the actual writing. So he knew everything I was going to do. He had taken the entire story, changed the names and written it. Without saying a word.”
Liz still remembered standing in Ryan’s office, hearing nothing but a rushing sound. She’d wondered if there was something wrong with her brain—a stroke or something. Because what she’d been reading hadn’t made sense. It couldn’t. The man she’d said she would love forever, the man she’d promised to marry couldn’t possibly have taken her work for his own. There had to be a mistake.
Montana swore softly. “What did you do?”
“I tried to convince myself I was crazy. Then I got mad. I waited until he was home and I confronted him.”
“Did he deny it?”
“No. Apparently having a good idea isn’t enough. His editor had hated the book and told Ryan they wouldn’t be publishing him anymore. Ryan was furious. He blamed me. He said I’d known what he was doing and had tricked him into writing a story that didn’t work. He said it wasn’t fair. That he had the actual talent. I was nothing but a hack, yet I had all the success.”
She still remembered the fury in his eyes, the loathing.
“He’d never been interested in me beyond what I could do for his career. He’d lied about nearly everything, especially how he felt about me.” Liz managed a smile. “The good news is he moved away after that and my recovery was fairly quick. Apparently I wasn’t as in love with him as I’d thought.”
But it had been one more illustration of the lesson that men shouldn’t be trusted. Not with something as delicate as a woman’s heart.
“How did Tyler take it?” Montana asked.
“It turns out my son had never much liked Ryan but he hadn’t told me because he wanted me to be happy. Which makes me about the luckiest mother ever.”
Montana sniffed. “Now I just want to hug him and never let go.”
“I know how you feel.”
“And kill that Ryan jerk. Want me to give Ethan his name so he can beat him up?”
Liz shook her head. “Probably best if Ethan doesn’t hear the story at all.” She didn’t need him to know how stupid she’d been.
“You’re right. But still. I hope he’s punished in some way.”
“I suspect Ryan will be unhappy for most of his life. That’s punishment enough for me. I’m just happy to have escaped. He gives writers a bad name.”
“You should tell the college to start giving your scholarship to students who want to be writers. That would be very cool.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your scholarship. Okay, it’s not yours, but it’s named after you. Here. At Fool’s Gold Community College.”
If they’d been drinking alcohol, Liz would have thought Montana was drunk. But it was the middle of the day and they’d only had lattes. “I don’t have a scholarship at the college.”
“Sure you do. It was set up a while ago. I don’t know all the details, but it was started with the scholarship you didn’t use.”
Liz stared at her blankly. “The scholarship?” Nothing about this made sense.
“You had a scholarship out of high school. Remember?”
“Sure. But I left.”
“Exactly. Someone had the idea to use that as seed money to fund a scholarship every year. They’re given to women who have faced hardship—financial or personal. I know because I looked into applying. You really don’t know about this?”
“No.”
“You should talk to the college. They can explain the details.”
“I will,” Liz assured, thinking that Montana had to be wrong. Who would have started a scholarship in her name?
An hour later, she had the information package in her hand and was smiling at a very excited clerk in the admissions office.
“We’re all huge fans,” the older woman told her. “I can’t believe you’re really here. We read all your books.”
“Thanks,” Liz said. “Can you tell me about the origin of the scholarship?”
The woman, her tag read Betty Higgins, frowned. “I would have thought someone would have been in touch with you about it. Very strange. Anyway, when you left town without using your scholarship money, someone suggested giving it to another student. But then several people came in with anonymous donations, increasing the amount and we realized we could make this an annual scholarship instead of a onetime gift.”
Betty glanced around as if to make sure they were alone and lowered her voice. “I moved here a few years ago, but heard all about your sad story. How your mama, God rest her soul, wasn’t exactly maternal and a lot of boys said hateful things about you. Apparently many people knew you were having a rough time of it and they felt badly. So they put this all together. Your scholarship is one of our most popular. Not only for people funding it, but for the women who apply. Most of the recipients are returning students. Women with families, trying to give themselves a better future. It’s so inspiring.”
Talk about too much information in too short a time, Liz thought, her head spinning.
She remembered the scholarship she’d been offered and how she’d planned to use the money to go away to college. She and Ethan had spent the summer talking about being together on a university campus. How perfect it would be.
Then he’d denied even knowing her and she’d taken off. She’d never given the money a second thought. She’d left because staying was impossible.
That much she could handle, but Betty’s claim that people had known about her circumstances astonished her. Part of her appreciated the gesture of donating while the rest of her wondered where they’d been when she’d been young and alone. A kind word back then would have meant the world to her.
It was too much, she thought.
“Thanks for the information,” she said.
“You’re welcome.” Betty smiled. “This is such a thrill. I can’t wait to tell everyone I met you. Oh. We’re having our reception in a few weeks. For the recipients. Can you come?”
“I, ah…”
“It’s only for an hour or so. I know those women would appreciate the chance to thank you in person.”
“I didn’t do anything,” Liz countered. “I’m not the one they should be thanking.”
“You’re an inspiration. In fact, two of the women wrote about you for their essays. How you started with nothing and made yourself a success. Why don’t I send you an invitation and you can think about it?”
“Um, sure.” Liz cleared her throat. “Thank you.”
“It was my pleasure.”
Liz left the college and walked to her car. But instead of driving home, she made her way back into town and parked outside of the Hendrix Construction office. Before she could change her mind, she turned off the engine and went into the building.
After giving her name to the receptionist, she paced the small waiting area. Seconds later, Ethan appeared, looking tall and strong and pleased to see her.
Inside her belly, something fluttered. Something hot and bright and dangerous. She ignored the sensation.
“Is this a good time?” she asked. “Can you talk?”
“Sure.”
He led the way to his office. “Everything all right?” he inquired as he closed the door behind her.
“No. Nothing’s all right. I’m still mad at you, by the way, so don’t think everything is fine between us. I hate this town. I hate everyone knowing everything about me. Your mother is still angry at me, and I hate that part of me understands why. I blame you for most of this, in case you were wondering. But just when I think I know exactly where all the pieces fit, I get surprised.”
“A good surprise or a bad one?”
“Good.” She paced the length of his office. “There’s a scholarship in my name.”
“At the community college.”
“You knew?” She spun to face him.
He leaned against his desk. “Sure. It’s been around awhile.”
“You never thought to tell me?”
“Why would I?”
Right. “I don’t know why, but I feel like it changes everything. But where were these caring people when I was growing up? Why didn’t someone tell protective services that my mother was slapping me around? Why didn’t someone notice that she supported herself with casual prostitution with her underaged daughter in the house? Probably because they didn’t want to get involved. So they ignored the problem until it went away, and then they started a scholarship in my name. Does that make sense to you?”
She crossed to the window and turned back. Moving seemed required. She wasn’t sure what would happen if she stood still. Scream maybe. Or fall apart.
As she passed Ethan, he grabbed her and pulled her close. At first she resisted, but then she collapsed into his arms, wanting to feel his strength surround her.
“It’s okay,” he murmured.
“You think?”
“It will be.”
She sucked in a breath, letting her hands rest on his shoulders. “This town is making me crazy.”
“If it makes you feel any better, old Mrs. Egger cornered me yesterday. Slapped me with that big purse of hers and accused me of not respecting you. Not only did she give me what for because I’d, and this is a direct quote, ‘ruined the reputation of a perfectly respectable girl,’ she pointed out that if I was going to let my sperm loose on society, I should keep track of them.” He shuddered. “I never want to hear a woman in her eighties talking about my sperm.”
Liz leaned her forehead against his shoulder and smiled. “I always liked Mrs. Egger.”
“I thought you’d say that.” He put his hand on her chin, pressing until she looked at him. “I know this is hard.”
“You really don’t.”
“I’m trying to understand. I want you to like it here.”
Meaning he wanted her to stay. Which wasn’t going to happen, but there was no reason to go over that material again, she thought, wanting to stay in his arms forever.
Her gaze dropped to his mouth. Wanting burned. Not just for how kissing him would make her feel, but because when she was with him, nothing else could touch her. There was only the man and what they could do to each other.
“I thought I was only going to have to deal with Roy’s kids,” she admitted. “You weren’t supposed to be a part of this.”
“Too late to get rid of me now.”
“I don’t want to,” she said.
“What do you want?”
An impossible question, she thought. One without an answer.
No. That wasn’t true. She had plenty of answers, just none she wanted to share with him.
“I want us to be friends,” she told him. “I want to be able to trust you.”
“You can.”
“I don’t think so.”
He kissed her. “Come on, Liz. You know me. I’m a good guy.”
“Are you saying there aren’t any more surprises?”
Before he could answer, his phone buzzed.
“Sorry to bother you, Ethan, but it’s that call from China.”
Liz stepped out of his arms. “When did you go international?”
“Not me. The windmills.” He frowned. “I need to take this call, but then I want to talk to you.”
“I’m fine. Go be successful. I have to get home.”
“Liz, I—”
She cut him off with the shake of her head. “International calls shouldn’t be kept waiting. I’ll see you later.”
She stepped out of his office and made her way to her car. Thoughts spun in her head. That there were multiple versions of the past. While she resented the fact that no one had bothered to step forward when she was growing up, she hadn’t been as ignored and forgotten as she’d thought.
Which meant what? That Fool’s Gold wasn’t evil? She’d never thought of it that way—at least not in general.
The information about a scholarship in her name shouldn’t have made a difference, yet she found herself feeling better about nearly everything and wasn’t exactly sure why.
LIZ WOKE EARLY THE NEXT morning with a growing sense of the inevitable. After showering and dressing, she went downstairs and started coffee. The kids would sleep until the construction crew arrived, which gave her a half hour or so of perfect quiet.
She took her coffee out onto the front porch to enjoy the stillness of the morning. The air was cool, the sky clear. The sound of birds greeted her as she settled on the top step with her mug.
Maybe she needed more time before making her decision, she thought cautiously. Yes, there were things she really hated about this town, but there were other parts she liked. Melissa and Abby were desperate to stay and after all they’d been through, shouldn’t she consider their feelings? Tyler would enjoy living close to his dad and Liz knew it was what Ethan wanted, too. Ethan’s mother was a problem, but better a rabid grandmother than one who wasn’t interested at all. Given time, maybe she and Liz could come to terms.
“Not my finest moment, but yes. There were some notes on his desk and I read them.”
“It wasn’t very good?” Montana asked sympathetically.
“Worse. It wasn’t his. He’d stolen my idea. Unlike him, I do talk about my stories. I can be tedious and annoying about it. It’s how I work through problems before I start the actual writing. So he knew everything I was going to do. He had taken the entire story, changed the names and written it. Without saying a word.”
Liz still remembered standing in Ryan’s office, hearing nothing but a rushing sound. She’d wondered if there was something wrong with her brain—a stroke or something. Because what she’d been reading hadn’t made sense. It couldn’t. The man she’d said she would love forever, the man she’d promised to marry couldn’t possibly have taken her work for his own. There had to be a mistake.
Montana swore softly. “What did you do?”
“I tried to convince myself I was crazy. Then I got mad. I waited until he was home and I confronted him.”
“Did he deny it?”
“No. Apparently having a good idea isn’t enough. His editor had hated the book and told Ryan they wouldn’t be publishing him anymore. Ryan was furious. He blamed me. He said I’d known what he was doing and had tricked him into writing a story that didn’t work. He said it wasn’t fair. That he had the actual talent. I was nothing but a hack, yet I had all the success.”
She still remembered the fury in his eyes, the loathing.
“He’d never been interested in me beyond what I could do for his career. He’d lied about nearly everything, especially how he felt about me.” Liz managed a smile. “The good news is he moved away after that and my recovery was fairly quick. Apparently I wasn’t as in love with him as I’d thought.”
But it had been one more illustration of the lesson that men shouldn’t be trusted. Not with something as delicate as a woman’s heart.
“How did Tyler take it?” Montana asked.
“It turns out my son had never much liked Ryan but he hadn’t told me because he wanted me to be happy. Which makes me about the luckiest mother ever.”
Montana sniffed. “Now I just want to hug him and never let go.”
“I know how you feel.”
“And kill that Ryan jerk. Want me to give Ethan his name so he can beat him up?”
Liz shook her head. “Probably best if Ethan doesn’t hear the story at all.” She didn’t need him to know how stupid she’d been.
“You’re right. But still. I hope he’s punished in some way.”
“I suspect Ryan will be unhappy for most of his life. That’s punishment enough for me. I’m just happy to have escaped. He gives writers a bad name.”
“You should tell the college to start giving your scholarship to students who want to be writers. That would be very cool.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your scholarship. Okay, it’s not yours, but it’s named after you. Here. At Fool’s Gold Community College.”
If they’d been drinking alcohol, Liz would have thought Montana was drunk. But it was the middle of the day and they’d only had lattes. “I don’t have a scholarship at the college.”
“Sure you do. It was set up a while ago. I don’t know all the details, but it was started with the scholarship you didn’t use.”
Liz stared at her blankly. “The scholarship?” Nothing about this made sense.
“You had a scholarship out of high school. Remember?”
“Sure. But I left.”
“Exactly. Someone had the idea to use that as seed money to fund a scholarship every year. They’re given to women who have faced hardship—financial or personal. I know because I looked into applying. You really don’t know about this?”
“No.”
“You should talk to the college. They can explain the details.”
“I will,” Liz assured, thinking that Montana had to be wrong. Who would have started a scholarship in her name?
An hour later, she had the information package in her hand and was smiling at a very excited clerk in the admissions office.
“We’re all huge fans,” the older woman told her. “I can’t believe you’re really here. We read all your books.”
“Thanks,” Liz said. “Can you tell me about the origin of the scholarship?”
The woman, her tag read Betty Higgins, frowned. “I would have thought someone would have been in touch with you about it. Very strange. Anyway, when you left town without using your scholarship money, someone suggested giving it to another student. But then several people came in with anonymous donations, increasing the amount and we realized we could make this an annual scholarship instead of a onetime gift.”
Betty glanced around as if to make sure they were alone and lowered her voice. “I moved here a few years ago, but heard all about your sad story. How your mama, God rest her soul, wasn’t exactly maternal and a lot of boys said hateful things about you. Apparently many people knew you were having a rough time of it and they felt badly. So they put this all together. Your scholarship is one of our most popular. Not only for people funding it, but for the women who apply. Most of the recipients are returning students. Women with families, trying to give themselves a better future. It’s so inspiring.”
Talk about too much information in too short a time, Liz thought, her head spinning.
She remembered the scholarship she’d been offered and how she’d planned to use the money to go away to college. She and Ethan had spent the summer talking about being together on a university campus. How perfect it would be.
Then he’d denied even knowing her and she’d taken off. She’d never given the money a second thought. She’d left because staying was impossible.
That much she could handle, but Betty’s claim that people had known about her circumstances astonished her. Part of her appreciated the gesture of donating while the rest of her wondered where they’d been when she’d been young and alone. A kind word back then would have meant the world to her.
It was too much, she thought.
“Thanks for the information,” she said.
“You’re welcome.” Betty smiled. “This is such a thrill. I can’t wait to tell everyone I met you. Oh. We’re having our reception in a few weeks. For the recipients. Can you come?”
“I, ah…”
“It’s only for an hour or so. I know those women would appreciate the chance to thank you in person.”
“I didn’t do anything,” Liz countered. “I’m not the one they should be thanking.”
“You’re an inspiration. In fact, two of the women wrote about you for their essays. How you started with nothing and made yourself a success. Why don’t I send you an invitation and you can think about it?”
“Um, sure.” Liz cleared her throat. “Thank you.”
“It was my pleasure.”
Liz left the college and walked to her car. But instead of driving home, she made her way back into town and parked outside of the Hendrix Construction office. Before she could change her mind, she turned off the engine and went into the building.
After giving her name to the receptionist, she paced the small waiting area. Seconds later, Ethan appeared, looking tall and strong and pleased to see her.
Inside her belly, something fluttered. Something hot and bright and dangerous. She ignored the sensation.
“Is this a good time?” she asked. “Can you talk?”
“Sure.”
He led the way to his office. “Everything all right?” he inquired as he closed the door behind her.
“No. Nothing’s all right. I’m still mad at you, by the way, so don’t think everything is fine between us. I hate this town. I hate everyone knowing everything about me. Your mother is still angry at me, and I hate that part of me understands why. I blame you for most of this, in case you were wondering. But just when I think I know exactly where all the pieces fit, I get surprised.”
“A good surprise or a bad one?”
“Good.” She paced the length of his office. “There’s a scholarship in my name.”
“At the community college.”
“You knew?” She spun to face him.
He leaned against his desk. “Sure. It’s been around awhile.”
“You never thought to tell me?”
“Why would I?”
Right. “I don’t know why, but I feel like it changes everything. But where were these caring people when I was growing up? Why didn’t someone tell protective services that my mother was slapping me around? Why didn’t someone notice that she supported herself with casual prostitution with her underaged daughter in the house? Probably because they didn’t want to get involved. So they ignored the problem until it went away, and then they started a scholarship in my name. Does that make sense to you?”
She crossed to the window and turned back. Moving seemed required. She wasn’t sure what would happen if she stood still. Scream maybe. Or fall apart.
As she passed Ethan, he grabbed her and pulled her close. At first she resisted, but then she collapsed into his arms, wanting to feel his strength surround her.
“It’s okay,” he murmured.
“You think?”
“It will be.”
She sucked in a breath, letting her hands rest on his shoulders. “This town is making me crazy.”
“If it makes you feel any better, old Mrs. Egger cornered me yesterday. Slapped me with that big purse of hers and accused me of not respecting you. Not only did she give me what for because I’d, and this is a direct quote, ‘ruined the reputation of a perfectly respectable girl,’ she pointed out that if I was going to let my sperm loose on society, I should keep track of them.” He shuddered. “I never want to hear a woman in her eighties talking about my sperm.”
Liz leaned her forehead against his shoulder and smiled. “I always liked Mrs. Egger.”
“I thought you’d say that.” He put his hand on her chin, pressing until she looked at him. “I know this is hard.”
“You really don’t.”
“I’m trying to understand. I want you to like it here.”
Meaning he wanted her to stay. Which wasn’t going to happen, but there was no reason to go over that material again, she thought, wanting to stay in his arms forever.
Her gaze dropped to his mouth. Wanting burned. Not just for how kissing him would make her feel, but because when she was with him, nothing else could touch her. There was only the man and what they could do to each other.
“I thought I was only going to have to deal with Roy’s kids,” she admitted. “You weren’t supposed to be a part of this.”
“Too late to get rid of me now.”
“I don’t want to,” she said.
“What do you want?”
An impossible question, she thought. One without an answer.
No. That wasn’t true. She had plenty of answers, just none she wanted to share with him.
“I want us to be friends,” she told him. “I want to be able to trust you.”
“You can.”
“I don’t think so.”
He kissed her. “Come on, Liz. You know me. I’m a good guy.”
“Are you saying there aren’t any more surprises?”
Before he could answer, his phone buzzed.
“Sorry to bother you, Ethan, but it’s that call from China.”
Liz stepped out of his arms. “When did you go international?”
“Not me. The windmills.” He frowned. “I need to take this call, but then I want to talk to you.”
“I’m fine. Go be successful. I have to get home.”
“Liz, I—”
She cut him off with the shake of her head. “International calls shouldn’t be kept waiting. I’ll see you later.”
She stepped out of his office and made her way to her car. Thoughts spun in her head. That there were multiple versions of the past. While she resented the fact that no one had bothered to step forward when she was growing up, she hadn’t been as ignored and forgotten as she’d thought.
Which meant what? That Fool’s Gold wasn’t evil? She’d never thought of it that way—at least not in general.
The information about a scholarship in her name shouldn’t have made a difference, yet she found herself feeling better about nearly everything and wasn’t exactly sure why.
LIZ WOKE EARLY THE NEXT morning with a growing sense of the inevitable. After showering and dressing, she went downstairs and started coffee. The kids would sleep until the construction crew arrived, which gave her a half hour or so of perfect quiet.
She took her coffee out onto the front porch to enjoy the stillness of the morning. The air was cool, the sky clear. The sound of birds greeted her as she settled on the top step with her mug.
Maybe she needed more time before making her decision, she thought cautiously. Yes, there were things she really hated about this town, but there were other parts she liked. Melissa and Abby were desperate to stay and after all they’d been through, shouldn’t she consider their feelings? Tyler would enjoy living close to his dad and Liz knew it was what Ethan wanted, too. Ethan’s mother was a problem, but better a rabid grandmother than one who wasn’t interested at all. Given time, maybe she and Liz could come to terms.
