Anguish
Page 53
Now I have proof you matter.
Now I’ll make him pay.
See how happy she made him? You’ll never compare, but you’re enough.
I’ll have you. I’ll destroy you. Then I’ll destroy him.
Bile rises in my throat as I stare at the contents of the box. The first thing I pull out is a photo of Mack and me. It was the last time we had sex, when we were at the bar. I’m standing, hair disheveled, and his forehead is pressed to mine. It was right before he ended it, but in the picture it looks like he’s completely in love with me. His eyes are on mine, our bodies close. His jeans are still undone, his shirt loose, and we’re just watching each other.
I put the photo down with a gasp, and gather myself.
Then I pull out the next item. It’s a letter. I open it, and what I read has my heart twisting.
Ingri,
I miss you. Every second I’m away, I forget how to breathe.
Not seeing your face everyday is killing me, but know that I’m always with you. I love you so much it burns. There’s not going to be a day in my life that you won’t be everything to me.
I adore you.
And I’ll love you every second I breathe, and beyond.
There will never be another.
Koda.
I hiccup, then I begin to cry, because it’s in that moment I realize I’m fully in love with Mack. I realize it because seeing his letter to another woman has my heart burning in a way I’ll never, ever be able to unfeel.
I don’t swipe my tears, I just lift the letter and drop it to the table, then I go to the next item. It’s a pair of panties that has a note attached. My stomach twists when I read that note.
These are the panties she wore the last time she saw him. She hid them from me, but she left their arousal on them.
I drop them, feeling the bile rise up to a threatening level. Sick. So fucking sick.
My fingers tremble as I pull out the rest of the items. There are a few pictures of Mack and the gorgeous Ingrid. Then there is a box of pregnancy tests. I blink a few times, then turn them over and stare at the note. And I stop breathing.
Soon, soon there’ll be a baby in you that isn’t his. That baby will haunt you for the rest of your life. And his. I’m coming for you, Jaylah.
I cry out, and drop the pregnancy-test box on the table. I push out of my chair, not thinking, just needing to get out of there. I get Diesel, get a bottle, then I run to the car and get in, driving off. I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t even care.
I just need to get away from all of it.
~*~*~*~
MACK
The house is silent. Too silent. I called the boys off two hours ago, because Jaylah wasn’t meant to be home, but she should be by now. She’s not here, and neither are they. Where the fuck would Jaylah go at this time of the night, and with Diesel? I know she’s hurtin’, she’s been avoiding me for weeks and that shit is on me. I treated her bad, like a piece of cheap pussy, and she’s not that. She’s a fuckin’ beautiful person, and without her I wouldn’t be with my son.
I fucked up and now she’s pulling back.
I walk in and go to drop my keys on the table when I see a box. What the hell is all that? I reach down and lift a piece of paper, and my chest tightens when I see it’s a letter I wrote many years ago to Ingrid.
Dropping it, I dig through the rest of it, and my blood runs cold.
Fuck.
“Jaylah!” I yell, even though I know she isn’t here.
Fuck.
I pull out my phone, dialing her number. She doesn’t answer. Fuck, no, please no. I dial Maddox next, and he answers second ring.
“What?”
“Benito has been back, something was dropped off for Jaylah. It was fucked up, and she ain’t here. Got a sick feelin’ she’s with him, and—”
“She’s here, bro.”
“What?” I growl.
“Showed up a while ago, beside herself.”
“Shit, I’ll be there in ten.”
“Right.”
I hang up, take my keys, and charge out the front door.
I know what that shit would have done to her, and it’s enough to send the poor girl over the edge. I’ve been a fuckin’ bastard to her, and I know, even if I’m strugglin’ to admit it, that seeing that shit and knowing it affected her, hurts me. She’s hurtin’ for me. Everything she does is for me, and I’ve done nothing but push her away when I know, deep in my fuckin’ soul . . .
She matters to me.
A fuckin’ lot.
‘Bout time she found that out.
I’m done with games. I’m done with loose pussy, and I’m done with livin’ like a stone.
Time to change it.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
JAYLAH
“You okay?” Santana asks, handing me a glass of soda.
I nod, staring at the wall, not sure what I feel. I know I feel sick, and so disgusted that any person could go to such lengths to make someone pay. Worse is the fact that I’m involved, when all I did was take a position as a nanny, fall for the God damned worst man in the world, and adore the baby that comes with him.
“Leave her be, Tana,” Maddox says softly.
I want to turn, I want to say it’s okay, it’ll be fine, but I can’t. I’m too shaken. I drove for more than an hour, around and around, not knowing where I was going. Figuring it was dangerous for me to be on the roads when I am so out of it, I turned and came to Santana’s house. She welcomed me with open arms and took Diesel, bathing him and keeping him happy and comfortable.
Now I’ll make him pay.
See how happy she made him? You’ll never compare, but you’re enough.
I’ll have you. I’ll destroy you. Then I’ll destroy him.
Bile rises in my throat as I stare at the contents of the box. The first thing I pull out is a photo of Mack and me. It was the last time we had sex, when we were at the bar. I’m standing, hair disheveled, and his forehead is pressed to mine. It was right before he ended it, but in the picture it looks like he’s completely in love with me. His eyes are on mine, our bodies close. His jeans are still undone, his shirt loose, and we’re just watching each other.
I put the photo down with a gasp, and gather myself.
Then I pull out the next item. It’s a letter. I open it, and what I read has my heart twisting.
Ingri,
I miss you. Every second I’m away, I forget how to breathe.
Not seeing your face everyday is killing me, but know that I’m always with you. I love you so much it burns. There’s not going to be a day in my life that you won’t be everything to me.
I adore you.
And I’ll love you every second I breathe, and beyond.
There will never be another.
Koda.
I hiccup, then I begin to cry, because it’s in that moment I realize I’m fully in love with Mack. I realize it because seeing his letter to another woman has my heart burning in a way I’ll never, ever be able to unfeel.
I don’t swipe my tears, I just lift the letter and drop it to the table, then I go to the next item. It’s a pair of panties that has a note attached. My stomach twists when I read that note.
These are the panties she wore the last time she saw him. She hid them from me, but she left their arousal on them.
I drop them, feeling the bile rise up to a threatening level. Sick. So fucking sick.
My fingers tremble as I pull out the rest of the items. There are a few pictures of Mack and the gorgeous Ingrid. Then there is a box of pregnancy tests. I blink a few times, then turn them over and stare at the note. And I stop breathing.
Soon, soon there’ll be a baby in you that isn’t his. That baby will haunt you for the rest of your life. And his. I’m coming for you, Jaylah.
I cry out, and drop the pregnancy-test box on the table. I push out of my chair, not thinking, just needing to get out of there. I get Diesel, get a bottle, then I run to the car and get in, driving off. I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t even care.
I just need to get away from all of it.
~*~*~*~
MACK
The house is silent. Too silent. I called the boys off two hours ago, because Jaylah wasn’t meant to be home, but she should be by now. She’s not here, and neither are they. Where the fuck would Jaylah go at this time of the night, and with Diesel? I know she’s hurtin’, she’s been avoiding me for weeks and that shit is on me. I treated her bad, like a piece of cheap pussy, and she’s not that. She’s a fuckin’ beautiful person, and without her I wouldn’t be with my son.
I fucked up and now she’s pulling back.
I walk in and go to drop my keys on the table when I see a box. What the hell is all that? I reach down and lift a piece of paper, and my chest tightens when I see it’s a letter I wrote many years ago to Ingrid.
Dropping it, I dig through the rest of it, and my blood runs cold.
Fuck.
“Jaylah!” I yell, even though I know she isn’t here.
Fuck.
I pull out my phone, dialing her number. She doesn’t answer. Fuck, no, please no. I dial Maddox next, and he answers second ring.
“What?”
“Benito has been back, something was dropped off for Jaylah. It was fucked up, and she ain’t here. Got a sick feelin’ she’s with him, and—”
“She’s here, bro.”
“What?” I growl.
“Showed up a while ago, beside herself.”
“Shit, I’ll be there in ten.”
“Right.”
I hang up, take my keys, and charge out the front door.
I know what that shit would have done to her, and it’s enough to send the poor girl over the edge. I’ve been a fuckin’ bastard to her, and I know, even if I’m strugglin’ to admit it, that seeing that shit and knowing it affected her, hurts me. She’s hurtin’ for me. Everything she does is for me, and I’ve done nothing but push her away when I know, deep in my fuckin’ soul . . .
She matters to me.
A fuckin’ lot.
‘Bout time she found that out.
I’m done with games. I’m done with loose pussy, and I’m done with livin’ like a stone.
Time to change it.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
JAYLAH
“You okay?” Santana asks, handing me a glass of soda.
I nod, staring at the wall, not sure what I feel. I know I feel sick, and so disgusted that any person could go to such lengths to make someone pay. Worse is the fact that I’m involved, when all I did was take a position as a nanny, fall for the God damned worst man in the world, and adore the baby that comes with him.
“Leave her be, Tana,” Maddox says softly.
I want to turn, I want to say it’s okay, it’ll be fine, but I can’t. I’m too shaken. I drove for more than an hour, around and around, not knowing where I was going. Figuring it was dangerous for me to be on the roads when I am so out of it, I turned and came to Santana’s house. She welcomed me with open arms and took Diesel, bathing him and keeping him happy and comfortable.
