At Peace
Page 121
“They’re leaving,” I told him.
“How much time we got?” he asked and my stomach dipped.
“A couple of hours,” I answered and his hand came up and curled around my breast.
“Plenty of time,” he muttered against the underside of my jaw.
“Joe, we need to let Mooch out.”
“After.”
“Joe –”
“After.”
“Joe –” he pinched my nipple and that scored straight through me so I whispered, “okay, after.”
His head came up and he was smiling then it came down and he was kissing me.
Mooch, lucky for us, was patient.
* * * * *
We were in the kitchen when the kids arrived. Joe was standing by the sink drinking coffee, his hair wet from his shower. I was standing in the open fridge, a pad of paper in my hand, making a grocery list. My hair was dry and styled. I’d taken a shower first while Joe dealt with a phone call and I’d gotten ready while Joe showered and dressed.
I’d never seen Joe shower. I’d never seen his hair wet and it had been a long freaking time since I shared space with a man while getting ready.
I liked it, all of it.
But when the kids got home, his eyes went to the window then to me and he said, “They’re home, buddy,” I forgot how much I liked his wet hair, standing in the steaming bathroom while he showered and I wiped at the mirror and I panicked.
Joe saw it immediately and demanded, “Relax.”
“Right,” I whispered.
He shook his head and grinned.
I closed the fridge, put down the pad of paper and pen and we walked to the door.
Joe opened it and we walked out, Joe sliding an arm around my shoulders and tucking me into his side as we did.
Kate was out and standing in the door but Keira burst from Dane’s truck and ran, arms windmilling, hair flying behind her, direct to Joe.
“Joe!” she cried then skidded to a halt in front of him and kept shouting, “I got up on water skis!”
Then I watched my body locked tight, as Joe’s hand came up and out. He hooked it around Keira’s head, pulled her to him as he bent low and he touched his mouth to her gleaming hair.
“Way to go,” he muttered against her hair then finished, “proud of you, honey.”
He let her go and I saw her body was locked as tight as mine, her face frozen in wonder and she stayed that way as Joe moved around her, going toward Kate.
I forced my eyes from a still motionless Keira to Kate who was standing by the truck staring at Keira. Joe walked right up to her, her body jolted when he arrived and she tipped her head back, peering up at him, giving him the perfect target when his head dipped down and he touched his lips to her forehead.
“Glad you’re home safe, Katy,” I heard him say, Kate’s head turned, her eyes cutting to me, her face filled with the same wonder as Keira’s had been.
Honey.
Katy.
Holy crap but I didn’t know anything more beautiful than Joe Callahan using those words with my daughters. The only thing more beautiful was their father doing it but they’d never have that, not ever again. This wasn’t the same, would never be, but it wasn’t sloppy seconds either.
Joe took the bag Kate was holding from her hand.
“Where’s Keira’s bag?” Joe asked.
“Back,” Kate said, her voice scratchy, “truck,” she finished, clearly unable to form sentences.
Joe moved to the truck.
It took some effort but I pulled myself together and said, “What? My girls are gone two days, they didn’t let me say good-bye, they come home and no hugs?”
Keira came unstuck and jumped at me. I folded her in my arms as Kate ran to us and joined our huddle. I gave them squeezes, smelling their hair, feeling their bodies against mine and letting that settle in my soul. Then I kissed each of their temples in turn, Kate first, Keira last and let them go.
“Right, let’s get you unpacked,” I looked to see Dane carrying a bag and hanging back and I smiled at him. “Hey Dane, thanks for cutting your family time short and bringing them home safe.”
“No probs, Miz Winters,” Dane replied, grinning at me and coming forward.
Joe carried the girls’ bags in, Dane carried his bag in, I held both my girls by the waist as we walked in.
An hour later, after the kids had unpacked, played with Mooch in the yard and we ate a lunch of sandwiches and chips, Joe took Dane to Fulsham’s Custard stand to buy a tub of custard.
I sat the girls down at the stools by the bar telling them we had to talk. They didn’t say anything, just gave each other looks and went to their stools. They were on the dining area side. I stood in the kitchen at the counter opposite them trying not to hyperventilate.
For the last hour my head had gone over a million ways to open this conversation and then decided all of them were lame.
Therefore I stood there looking between them not having that first clue what to say and, unfortunately, trying to think of what to say I stayed silent a long time.
Kate spoke first. “We get it, Mawdy, you’re with Joe.”
I stared at her.
“Yeah, no duh,” Keira put in.
“So,” I forced out, “you… this doesn’t come as a surprise?”
Kate grinned and informed me, “Dane said a man doesn’t fix a garage door opener unless he’s fixin’ to use that garage.”
I felt my lips part. Even Dane had cottoned onto the situation way before me.
“And he came to the mall with us. Guys like Joe don’t go to malls,” Keira added, sounding wise beyond her years.
“You’re not upset?” I asked and Kate shook her head, still grinning so my eyes went to Keira and she was watching me.
“Who was the chick?” she asked.
“The chick?” I asked back.
“Yeah, that lady he was with before you went all…” she trailed off and then finished, “you know.”
I knew. She was talking about Nadia.
Shit.
“She was… a friend of Joe’s,” I answered.
“She his friend now?” Keira asked.
“No,” I replied instantly.
Keira kept watching me then went on. “So, we’re his only friends now?”
I stared at my daughter and realized she thought we were a unit which we were. Joe took us all or Joe didn’t get us.
“Yeah, honey, we’re Joe’s only friends now,” I said quietly.
“What about Mike?” Keira asked.
“How much time we got?” he asked and my stomach dipped.
“A couple of hours,” I answered and his hand came up and curled around my breast.
“Plenty of time,” he muttered against the underside of my jaw.
“Joe, we need to let Mooch out.”
“After.”
“Joe –”
“After.”
“Joe –” he pinched my nipple and that scored straight through me so I whispered, “okay, after.”
His head came up and he was smiling then it came down and he was kissing me.
Mooch, lucky for us, was patient.
* * * * *
We were in the kitchen when the kids arrived. Joe was standing by the sink drinking coffee, his hair wet from his shower. I was standing in the open fridge, a pad of paper in my hand, making a grocery list. My hair was dry and styled. I’d taken a shower first while Joe dealt with a phone call and I’d gotten ready while Joe showered and dressed.
I’d never seen Joe shower. I’d never seen his hair wet and it had been a long freaking time since I shared space with a man while getting ready.
I liked it, all of it.
But when the kids got home, his eyes went to the window then to me and he said, “They’re home, buddy,” I forgot how much I liked his wet hair, standing in the steaming bathroom while he showered and I wiped at the mirror and I panicked.
Joe saw it immediately and demanded, “Relax.”
“Right,” I whispered.
He shook his head and grinned.
I closed the fridge, put down the pad of paper and pen and we walked to the door.
Joe opened it and we walked out, Joe sliding an arm around my shoulders and tucking me into his side as we did.
Kate was out and standing in the door but Keira burst from Dane’s truck and ran, arms windmilling, hair flying behind her, direct to Joe.
“Joe!” she cried then skidded to a halt in front of him and kept shouting, “I got up on water skis!”
Then I watched my body locked tight, as Joe’s hand came up and out. He hooked it around Keira’s head, pulled her to him as he bent low and he touched his mouth to her gleaming hair.
“Way to go,” he muttered against her hair then finished, “proud of you, honey.”
He let her go and I saw her body was locked as tight as mine, her face frozen in wonder and she stayed that way as Joe moved around her, going toward Kate.
I forced my eyes from a still motionless Keira to Kate who was standing by the truck staring at Keira. Joe walked right up to her, her body jolted when he arrived and she tipped her head back, peering up at him, giving him the perfect target when his head dipped down and he touched his lips to her forehead.
“Glad you’re home safe, Katy,” I heard him say, Kate’s head turned, her eyes cutting to me, her face filled with the same wonder as Keira’s had been.
Honey.
Katy.
Holy crap but I didn’t know anything more beautiful than Joe Callahan using those words with my daughters. The only thing more beautiful was their father doing it but they’d never have that, not ever again. This wasn’t the same, would never be, but it wasn’t sloppy seconds either.
Joe took the bag Kate was holding from her hand.
“Where’s Keira’s bag?” Joe asked.
“Back,” Kate said, her voice scratchy, “truck,” she finished, clearly unable to form sentences.
Joe moved to the truck.
It took some effort but I pulled myself together and said, “What? My girls are gone two days, they didn’t let me say good-bye, they come home and no hugs?”
Keira came unstuck and jumped at me. I folded her in my arms as Kate ran to us and joined our huddle. I gave them squeezes, smelling their hair, feeling their bodies against mine and letting that settle in my soul. Then I kissed each of their temples in turn, Kate first, Keira last and let them go.
“Right, let’s get you unpacked,” I looked to see Dane carrying a bag and hanging back and I smiled at him. “Hey Dane, thanks for cutting your family time short and bringing them home safe.”
“No probs, Miz Winters,” Dane replied, grinning at me and coming forward.
Joe carried the girls’ bags in, Dane carried his bag in, I held both my girls by the waist as we walked in.
An hour later, after the kids had unpacked, played with Mooch in the yard and we ate a lunch of sandwiches and chips, Joe took Dane to Fulsham’s Custard stand to buy a tub of custard.
I sat the girls down at the stools by the bar telling them we had to talk. They didn’t say anything, just gave each other looks and went to their stools. They were on the dining area side. I stood in the kitchen at the counter opposite them trying not to hyperventilate.
For the last hour my head had gone over a million ways to open this conversation and then decided all of them were lame.
Therefore I stood there looking between them not having that first clue what to say and, unfortunately, trying to think of what to say I stayed silent a long time.
Kate spoke first. “We get it, Mawdy, you’re with Joe.”
I stared at her.
“Yeah, no duh,” Keira put in.
“So,” I forced out, “you… this doesn’t come as a surprise?”
Kate grinned and informed me, “Dane said a man doesn’t fix a garage door opener unless he’s fixin’ to use that garage.”
I felt my lips part. Even Dane had cottoned onto the situation way before me.
“And he came to the mall with us. Guys like Joe don’t go to malls,” Keira added, sounding wise beyond her years.
“You’re not upset?” I asked and Kate shook her head, still grinning so my eyes went to Keira and she was watching me.
“Who was the chick?” she asked.
“The chick?” I asked back.
“Yeah, that lady he was with before you went all…” she trailed off and then finished, “you know.”
I knew. She was talking about Nadia.
Shit.
“She was… a friend of Joe’s,” I answered.
“She his friend now?” Keira asked.
“No,” I replied instantly.
Keira kept watching me then went on. “So, we’re his only friends now?”
I stared at my daughter and realized she thought we were a unit which we were. Joe took us all or Joe didn’t get us.
“Yeah, honey, we’re Joe’s only friends now,” I said quietly.
“What about Mike?” Keira asked.
