Better When He's Bad
Page 30
I gulped and wanted to lean against Bax’s side, but didn’t want to set either Race or him off again. I was just going to have to comfort myself. Just like I always did.
I rubbed my arms up and down the soft fabric of the sweatshirt and looked back and forth between the two men. “So what now?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I came to find Bax. I can’t stay hidden, because sooner or later Benny is going to come after you to get me to make a move one way or the other. They’ll grab you to get me to come out of hiding; whatever Novak’s plan is, he wants me to be part of it. They know about the tape now. I told him if he ever came near you again after they knocked you around, I would send it to the feds. I thought that’s why they have been looking for me but now I’m not so sure. No one knows where the tape is besides me. Novak has cops on the take, he has eyes everywhere. I’ve spent the last few weeks trying to figure out where his reach ends.” His blond head dropped a little and his shoulders slumped. “I don’t know who we can trust beyond Titus.”
We were all quiet, the weight of having to deal with any and all of Novak’s machinations heavy in the room around us. I could hear Bax’s steady breathing, could see the fear and anger stamped on Race’s face, and I thought Bax was right, I did deserve more than this in life.
Bax pushed off the counter and scraped his hands hard over his scalp. He looked at me and then at Race. “Give me the tape.”
I winced and Race scowled.
“No!” I screamed it out of fear for Bax’s safety, Race barked it out of indignation. Bax just shook his head.
“What other option is there? Novak already has a hard-on for me. He never would have involved you or Dovie in any of his machinations if he didn’t want to have me over a barrel. It’s my fault. I break the law. I steal shit and end up tied into guys like him. Neither one of you needs to suffer for it anymore. This is my mess, I’ll clean it up. Whether it’s about the tape and blackmail or something else altogether.”
I grabbed him. I couldn’t help it. I wrapped my hands around his biceps, but like when I thought he was going to run away from me earlier, I could already see the dark barriers folding down as he looked down at my panicked face.
“So what? You’re going to offer yourself up as the sacrificial lamb? That doesn’t solve the problem, it just places you in the line of fire instead of Race.”
“Yeah, Bax. I followed you willingly down this path. You didn’t have to drag me kicking and screaming. I knew it was wrong, knew the risks we were taking, and you already gave up enough in this nightmare. Novak is my problem.”
Bax swore and I think my heart started to fracture when he purposely untangled himself from my clutching grip.
“Novak is the Point’s problem.”
I gulped back all the sour things I was feeling, the bitter taste of Shane disappearing behind everything that was Bax right before my eyes.
“And you have to be the one to take care of it?” It was a stupid question to ask and I almost choked on it.
There was nothing in his eyes when he looked at me, he was back to that dangerous stranger that I was equal parts scared of and fascinated by. He pulled out the big guns, the ones that there was no way Race could argue against. I knew, just like that, the battle was over.
“I went to jail for you, Race. I spent five years hating you, being disappointed in you, and convincing myself not to kill you when I got out. I might understand why you had to do it, but that’s five years I won’t get back and you owe me for it. Give me the f**king tape and let me handle Novak. You keep your sister safe and make sure no more of this nasty shit blows back on her.”
I wanted to argue, wanted Race to protest, but he just nodded, and like that, everything shifted. I wasn’t Bax’s lover, his friend, or his partner in the shared goal of finding Race; I was just some girl and he was just some guy and this was the kind of life we lived in the Point. No one got a happy ending, and I should have known I was not the exception to the rule.
CHAPTER 13
Bax
I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN Gus knew more than he was letting on. That old coot didn’t let anything get by him, and I should’ve been more clued in by the fact that he wasn’t more alarmed by Race’s disappearance than he was. As it turned out, my friend was hiding out in the apartment Gus kept above the garage for personal reasons. Reasons that involved more than one girlfriend and a jealous wife. Race had been right under Novak’s nose all along, so close it was really going to chap his ass when everything played out. Served the bastard right. That’s what happened when any one man tried to play God over so many other people’s lives. I couldn’t wait to laugh in his face and put my boot on the back of his neck.
Of course I was going to have to get the bitter taste of the last look Dovie had given me out of my mouth before I did anything. I could see it in her eyes; she wanted me to ask her to stay with me, to change my mind about going into the lion’s den. I couldn’t do it. Not only because she would be eaten alive if she tried to stay by my side, but because tonight I had come very close to crossing a line I never would have imagined myself crossing. She got under my skin, made me want to make things different, but that wasn’t going to be possible, so I put her in the passenger seat of Race’s cherry ’66 Mustang without a kiss good-bye and closed the door. I watched her eyes turn from the color of the forest to the color of the night sky, and it twisted something up inside my chest so hard, I thought it was going to take me to my knees.
Race watched the entire thing with a frown, and when I told him if anything happened to her I would hold him personally responsible, instead of getting offended or hostile, he just nodded his head solemnly and told me, “I understand, Bax. Be careful.”
There was no such thing as careful when playing Russian roulette with a guy like Novak, so I didn’t bother to respond. I lit up a cigarette and watched as the taillights disappeared around the corner. It was already close to dawn and there was no going back to bed, not after having a gun in my face and the ensuing tussle with Race still thudding in my blood. Plus I felt like I was choking on the disappointment I could feel bleeding off of Dovie as she walked away. I couldn’t pretend like she didn’t matter, but I also couldn’t pretend like I didn’t know she needed something better than what I would end up bringing her way. She didn’t need to spend one second of her time visiting a grave or the penitentiary, and those were about the only two options she was going to get if we kept going the way we were together.
I dug my phone out of my back pocket, and for the third time, which was more than I ever had in my entire life before, called my brother. He didn’t answer right away, so I finished the cigarette and went back up to the now thoroughly trashed apartment. I hadn’t really wanted to hurt Race, but no one was going to pull a gun on me and get off lightly, even if I could understand his displeasure at finding me n*ked and totally wrapped around his sister. That wasn’t anything a big brother wanted to walk in on.
I was stripped down and getting ready to rinse the entire night away in a scalding shower when my phone decided to ring from the other room. Sighing, I wrapped a towel around my waist and went to answer the callback.
“Now what?”
Titus sounded annoyed and I couldn’t really blame him. He had called off the cavalry when the neighbors had reported the disturbance earlier. He was pissed Race had shown up out of the blue, and even more pissed when I told him about the nine-millimeter wake-up call. I think he was starting to regret forcing this brotherly-bond thing when he knew good and well it only mattered to me as long as I could use it to my advantage.
“I have the flash drive.”
I didn’t think he was going to need any more information than that, and I was right. I heard him suck a breath in.
“Race gave you the video?”
“A copy of it. It’s stored on a hard drive somewhere in Gus’s shop, which is where he’s been this entire time, by the way.”
Titus swore. “Shoulda known that old bastard knew more than he was letting on.”
“That’s what I said when he told me.”
“So you’re going to turn the video over to me so I can arrest Novak.” It wasn’t said as a question.
I scowled at my ragged reflection in the mirror over the bathroom sink. Every single week since I had been let out, I had managed to find myself in some kind of physical altercation. My life was violent, filled with blood and uncertainty, and there was no place in it for a girl like Dovie, even if I already felt like there was a hole where she had been.
“I’m going to take Novak down.”
Silence met the bold declaration, but I expected nothing less. My brother was a law-abiding citizen, a cop, a man who saw things clearly as right or wrong, which is why we could never really operate on the same wavelength. His world was all solid shades of black and white; mine was a muddy gray, tinted with vibrant shades of red and green. Red for blood, green for dirty money.
I was surprised he didn’t immediately launch into a lecture or give me the runaround about how it was the law’s job to handle Novak, to protect the Point. Instead he grumbled something foul and asked, “Wanna grab breakfast in a couple?”
My eyebrows shot up. “Sure, why not.”
We made plans to meet at a diner close to the precinct Titus worked out of, and I finished trying to wash Dovie’s memory and scent off of my skin. The cut on my side was open again and Race had gotten a couple good blows to my ribs, so I was moving a little slower than normal. It wasn’t until I went to get dressed that I realized Dovie had left still wrapped up in my new hoodie. I didn’t want to admit that the idea of her holding on to something of mine made something in my gut settle down. I had never really been possessive of anything in my life, aside from my car and my friendship with Race. Whatever I was feeling for Dovie trumped all of it. It felt like hope and promise and all the things in life I had never imagined would apply to me.
I found a place to leave the Runner where I thought it would be inconspicuous and not draw attention to either me or my brother. Titus was already seated in a booth at the back, a plastic menu covering his face. He flicked the edge of it to the side when I sat down across from him and grunted a greeting at me. He looked tired and older than his twenty-nine years. His bright blue eyes were rimmed in red and his dark hair looked like he had used motor oil and a ceiling fan to style it. He had also ditched his cop wear of a pressed white shirt and tie. The guy sitting across from me looked like he could give me a run for my money in the pit at Nassir’s—or be found riding shotgun next to me in one of my boosted rides. We always kind of looked alike, apart from the eye color, but now there was no denying we were built from the same stock. He looked just as rough and dangerous as I typically did.
The waitress came over and Titus asked her to just leave the pot of coffee she was holding. He ordered a massive breakfast and I just got some bacon and eggs. I wasn’t hungry, I was anxious to get the ball rolling.
“What’s up, Officer King?”
He cut me a look. “Race beat the crap out of you. You got a wicked bruise on the side of your face.”
“I know. He got me in the ribs even worse. Can’t say I blame him. I was all over Dovie, and there were no clothes involved.”
“What’s the story with you and her anyway? She doesn’t really strike me as your type.”
I chomped on a piece of the bacon and gave him a considering look. “How would you know what my type is, Titus? It’s not like you were around when I finally figured out what girls were for.”
He looked at me and frowned, his mug of coffee stilled halfway to his mouth. “Just because I wasn’t around didn’t mean I wasn’t keeping tabs on you. If I hadn’t kept a finger on the pulse of the felonies and misdemeanors of the infamous Shane Baxter, your ass would’ve been in prison a lot sooner than when you turned eighteen.”
I rubbed my arms up and down the soft fabric of the sweatshirt and looked back and forth between the two men. “So what now?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I came to find Bax. I can’t stay hidden, because sooner or later Benny is going to come after you to get me to make a move one way or the other. They’ll grab you to get me to come out of hiding; whatever Novak’s plan is, he wants me to be part of it. They know about the tape now. I told him if he ever came near you again after they knocked you around, I would send it to the feds. I thought that’s why they have been looking for me but now I’m not so sure. No one knows where the tape is besides me. Novak has cops on the take, he has eyes everywhere. I’ve spent the last few weeks trying to figure out where his reach ends.” His blond head dropped a little and his shoulders slumped. “I don’t know who we can trust beyond Titus.”
We were all quiet, the weight of having to deal with any and all of Novak’s machinations heavy in the room around us. I could hear Bax’s steady breathing, could see the fear and anger stamped on Race’s face, and I thought Bax was right, I did deserve more than this in life.
Bax pushed off the counter and scraped his hands hard over his scalp. He looked at me and then at Race. “Give me the tape.”
I winced and Race scowled.
“No!” I screamed it out of fear for Bax’s safety, Race barked it out of indignation. Bax just shook his head.
“What other option is there? Novak already has a hard-on for me. He never would have involved you or Dovie in any of his machinations if he didn’t want to have me over a barrel. It’s my fault. I break the law. I steal shit and end up tied into guys like him. Neither one of you needs to suffer for it anymore. This is my mess, I’ll clean it up. Whether it’s about the tape and blackmail or something else altogether.”
I grabbed him. I couldn’t help it. I wrapped my hands around his biceps, but like when I thought he was going to run away from me earlier, I could already see the dark barriers folding down as he looked down at my panicked face.
“So what? You’re going to offer yourself up as the sacrificial lamb? That doesn’t solve the problem, it just places you in the line of fire instead of Race.”
“Yeah, Bax. I followed you willingly down this path. You didn’t have to drag me kicking and screaming. I knew it was wrong, knew the risks we were taking, and you already gave up enough in this nightmare. Novak is my problem.”
Bax swore and I think my heart started to fracture when he purposely untangled himself from my clutching grip.
“Novak is the Point’s problem.”
I gulped back all the sour things I was feeling, the bitter taste of Shane disappearing behind everything that was Bax right before my eyes.
“And you have to be the one to take care of it?” It was a stupid question to ask and I almost choked on it.
There was nothing in his eyes when he looked at me, he was back to that dangerous stranger that I was equal parts scared of and fascinated by. He pulled out the big guns, the ones that there was no way Race could argue against. I knew, just like that, the battle was over.
“I went to jail for you, Race. I spent five years hating you, being disappointed in you, and convincing myself not to kill you when I got out. I might understand why you had to do it, but that’s five years I won’t get back and you owe me for it. Give me the f**king tape and let me handle Novak. You keep your sister safe and make sure no more of this nasty shit blows back on her.”
I wanted to argue, wanted Race to protest, but he just nodded, and like that, everything shifted. I wasn’t Bax’s lover, his friend, or his partner in the shared goal of finding Race; I was just some girl and he was just some guy and this was the kind of life we lived in the Point. No one got a happy ending, and I should have known I was not the exception to the rule.
CHAPTER 13
Bax
I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN Gus knew more than he was letting on. That old coot didn’t let anything get by him, and I should’ve been more clued in by the fact that he wasn’t more alarmed by Race’s disappearance than he was. As it turned out, my friend was hiding out in the apartment Gus kept above the garage for personal reasons. Reasons that involved more than one girlfriend and a jealous wife. Race had been right under Novak’s nose all along, so close it was really going to chap his ass when everything played out. Served the bastard right. That’s what happened when any one man tried to play God over so many other people’s lives. I couldn’t wait to laugh in his face and put my boot on the back of his neck.
Of course I was going to have to get the bitter taste of the last look Dovie had given me out of my mouth before I did anything. I could see it in her eyes; she wanted me to ask her to stay with me, to change my mind about going into the lion’s den. I couldn’t do it. Not only because she would be eaten alive if she tried to stay by my side, but because tonight I had come very close to crossing a line I never would have imagined myself crossing. She got under my skin, made me want to make things different, but that wasn’t going to be possible, so I put her in the passenger seat of Race’s cherry ’66 Mustang without a kiss good-bye and closed the door. I watched her eyes turn from the color of the forest to the color of the night sky, and it twisted something up inside my chest so hard, I thought it was going to take me to my knees.
Race watched the entire thing with a frown, and when I told him if anything happened to her I would hold him personally responsible, instead of getting offended or hostile, he just nodded his head solemnly and told me, “I understand, Bax. Be careful.”
There was no such thing as careful when playing Russian roulette with a guy like Novak, so I didn’t bother to respond. I lit up a cigarette and watched as the taillights disappeared around the corner. It was already close to dawn and there was no going back to bed, not after having a gun in my face and the ensuing tussle with Race still thudding in my blood. Plus I felt like I was choking on the disappointment I could feel bleeding off of Dovie as she walked away. I couldn’t pretend like she didn’t matter, but I also couldn’t pretend like I didn’t know she needed something better than what I would end up bringing her way. She didn’t need to spend one second of her time visiting a grave or the penitentiary, and those were about the only two options she was going to get if we kept going the way we were together.
I dug my phone out of my back pocket, and for the third time, which was more than I ever had in my entire life before, called my brother. He didn’t answer right away, so I finished the cigarette and went back up to the now thoroughly trashed apartment. I hadn’t really wanted to hurt Race, but no one was going to pull a gun on me and get off lightly, even if I could understand his displeasure at finding me n*ked and totally wrapped around his sister. That wasn’t anything a big brother wanted to walk in on.
I was stripped down and getting ready to rinse the entire night away in a scalding shower when my phone decided to ring from the other room. Sighing, I wrapped a towel around my waist and went to answer the callback.
“Now what?”
Titus sounded annoyed and I couldn’t really blame him. He had called off the cavalry when the neighbors had reported the disturbance earlier. He was pissed Race had shown up out of the blue, and even more pissed when I told him about the nine-millimeter wake-up call. I think he was starting to regret forcing this brotherly-bond thing when he knew good and well it only mattered to me as long as I could use it to my advantage.
“I have the flash drive.”
I didn’t think he was going to need any more information than that, and I was right. I heard him suck a breath in.
“Race gave you the video?”
“A copy of it. It’s stored on a hard drive somewhere in Gus’s shop, which is where he’s been this entire time, by the way.”
Titus swore. “Shoulda known that old bastard knew more than he was letting on.”
“That’s what I said when he told me.”
“So you’re going to turn the video over to me so I can arrest Novak.” It wasn’t said as a question.
I scowled at my ragged reflection in the mirror over the bathroom sink. Every single week since I had been let out, I had managed to find myself in some kind of physical altercation. My life was violent, filled with blood and uncertainty, and there was no place in it for a girl like Dovie, even if I already felt like there was a hole where she had been.
“I’m going to take Novak down.”
Silence met the bold declaration, but I expected nothing less. My brother was a law-abiding citizen, a cop, a man who saw things clearly as right or wrong, which is why we could never really operate on the same wavelength. His world was all solid shades of black and white; mine was a muddy gray, tinted with vibrant shades of red and green. Red for blood, green for dirty money.
I was surprised he didn’t immediately launch into a lecture or give me the runaround about how it was the law’s job to handle Novak, to protect the Point. Instead he grumbled something foul and asked, “Wanna grab breakfast in a couple?”
My eyebrows shot up. “Sure, why not.”
We made plans to meet at a diner close to the precinct Titus worked out of, and I finished trying to wash Dovie’s memory and scent off of my skin. The cut on my side was open again and Race had gotten a couple good blows to my ribs, so I was moving a little slower than normal. It wasn’t until I went to get dressed that I realized Dovie had left still wrapped up in my new hoodie. I didn’t want to admit that the idea of her holding on to something of mine made something in my gut settle down. I had never really been possessive of anything in my life, aside from my car and my friendship with Race. Whatever I was feeling for Dovie trumped all of it. It felt like hope and promise and all the things in life I had never imagined would apply to me.
I found a place to leave the Runner where I thought it would be inconspicuous and not draw attention to either me or my brother. Titus was already seated in a booth at the back, a plastic menu covering his face. He flicked the edge of it to the side when I sat down across from him and grunted a greeting at me. He looked tired and older than his twenty-nine years. His bright blue eyes were rimmed in red and his dark hair looked like he had used motor oil and a ceiling fan to style it. He had also ditched his cop wear of a pressed white shirt and tie. The guy sitting across from me looked like he could give me a run for my money in the pit at Nassir’s—or be found riding shotgun next to me in one of my boosted rides. We always kind of looked alike, apart from the eye color, but now there was no denying we were built from the same stock. He looked just as rough and dangerous as I typically did.
The waitress came over and Titus asked her to just leave the pot of coffee she was holding. He ordered a massive breakfast and I just got some bacon and eggs. I wasn’t hungry, I was anxious to get the ball rolling.
“What’s up, Officer King?”
He cut me a look. “Race beat the crap out of you. You got a wicked bruise on the side of your face.”
“I know. He got me in the ribs even worse. Can’t say I blame him. I was all over Dovie, and there were no clothes involved.”
“What’s the story with you and her anyway? She doesn’t really strike me as your type.”
I chomped on a piece of the bacon and gave him a considering look. “How would you know what my type is, Titus? It’s not like you were around when I finally figured out what girls were for.”
He looked at me and frowned, his mug of coffee stilled halfway to his mouth. “Just because I wasn’t around didn’t mean I wasn’t keeping tabs on you. If I hadn’t kept a finger on the pulse of the felonies and misdemeanors of the infamous Shane Baxter, your ass would’ve been in prison a lot sooner than when you turned eighteen.”
