Break
Page 40
His deep voice rumbled through my chest. I shook my head violently. “No, I told no one about us. I swear, Luke!” Except Natalie.
I froze in Luke’s arms. Natalie, how could you do this to me? The betrayal was like a slap to the face. How could she tell them about my foster parents? Fresh tears spilled down my cheeks and as Luke pulled away, there was sympathy on his face—but a little anger, too.
“She would never do this to me.”
He smiled without humor. “Just about anyone is capable of just about anything. I’ve had this happen to me countless times.” He stroked my hair. “I’m sorry about this. I know how it feels, believe me.”
I stumbled from the bathroom in disbelief, the horror of it all pounding in my brain. I dug into my purse and opened my cellphone and saw three texts:
You need to call me immediately
Don’t let Luke go on TMZ
Jessica, I swear I didn’t tell anyone
There were five missed calls and two voice messages. I played them both on speakerphone. Luke listened beside me, fury etched all over his face. The first message expressed her confusion, the second one was much more clear. “Jessica,” she said in a trembling voice. “I found out what happened. Ben saw the photos and called TMZ. They offered him a lot of money for your name and background, and then they found your foster parents and they said all of those terrible things.” She began to sob. “I’m so sorry, Jessica. I don’t think he meant for any of this to happen—”
I ended the voicemail. Somehow I felt emptier than I had before. My best friend’s fiancé sold me out, all because she couldn’t keep her trap shut. I looked at him desperately. “I never told Ben anything. Natalie knew about the website before I met you, so she must have told him. I told her not to.”
Luke shook his head and shrugged. He wouldn’t even look at me. He didn’t even want to touch me. I could feel his disgust for my friend, and contempt for me. “I’m going to bed.”
Is this it? Darkness swallowed the room as Luke turned off the light. I sat on the carpet, hugging my legs. I was too tired, but I didn’t want to join Luke in the bed, when he clearly didn’t want me anywhere around him. How can I fix this?
* * *
I woke up with my back aching as Luke shook me awake, his hand on my knee. It took several moments for me to remember why I felt so awful.
His hands stroked my shoulders. “Did you stay here all night?”
My eyes burned with fatigue. “I—didn’t think you wanted me around.”
Luke’s face was pained. “I was angry, but not at you.” He picked me up and kissed my throat. “Let’s get out of here.”
I nodded, my spirits rising slightly. So, we were still together, despite our secret being out in the open. My heart beat against my throat as he hugged me. I don’t deserve him.
It was hard to tell whether his aunt and uncle had seen the report on TMZ. By now, other gossip websites would be repeating the same story. I dressed as quickly as possible, eager to leave Chicago and return home. Return to what? To my volunteer job at the soup kitchen? To my ‘best friend’? The ten grand in my account—how long would it last? My heart pounded with anxiety. I did not want to return home; I didn’t want to look at Natalie and hear her useless apologies, or deal with the fact that I was still broke and jobless. I have Luke, I reminded myself. At least I have him.
I watched as Luke packed his bags with a bit more force than was necessary. For how long, though?
Luke was silent all the way to the airport, and didn’t speak a word to me during the flight. Like him, I was waiting for the axe to fall. I felt relief when the pilot announced that we were flying over Oakland and would be landing shortly. I looked down and saw the blue, freezing water of the bay. He glanced at his phone immediately after landing and stuffed it back into his jacket.
What now? As I followed Luke out of the plane, I wondered what the hell was going to happen. Now that the jig was up, would we still spend every waking moment together? Would Luke tell me that he had enough of me and that I should go home? The thought of being away from him, even for one night, made my throat tighten. I was used to being around him, comforted by his presence, and I needed his touch to be nearby.
I squeezed his hand as we waited in the freezing air for a cab.
“I know you must be anxious to go home, but I don’t want to be alone.”
He was actually asking me to stay with him. “Luke, I want to be with you.” I didn’t need to add that I had no desire to be in Natalie’s presence, not after what her fiancé did.
It annoyed me that there were paparazzi still clicking away at us outside SFO. I couldn’t wait to see the headlines: Luke Pardini seen at SFO with blonde escort, who does he think he’s kidding?
I bounced on my toes to give him a kiss. He drew my body into his and bit down on my lip as I swept my tongue across his mouth. My heart was pounding when he pulled away with a heated look on his face.
“I can’t wait to get home,” he whispered in my ear as the cab pulled up.
Twenty-minutes later, we stumbled up the steps of his Victorian home in Pacific Heights. It was one of the richest areas in San Francisco, where the homes had actual driveways, a luxury in the city. I barely had time to marvel at the beauty of his home before Luke grabbed my hand and pulled me upstairs. We ran up the steps and he pulled me to the side, his arms wrapping themselves fiercely around my waist. His mouth parted and I leaned forward to taste those lips that I fantasized about all day. His fingers dug into the waistband of my jeans and I slid my hands under his sweater. I dragged my thumb across his hard nipple and squeezed his back muscles as he slid around my backside. I could already feel his hardness grinding against my leg and my core heated, almost like I could feel him thrusting inside me already.
We were halfway to the bedroom and his mouth was tracing a downward path from my neck. Then the phone rang, jarring us out of our dance towards the bed. My face hot, I looked up at Luke who seemed to be debating whether to answer it or not. He let out an angry sigh and kissed my head.
“It might be work, just hold on.”
Damn it.
He picked the phone off the dresser and winced when he looked at the screen. I felt cold all over as I realized what the expression on his face meant. Crap.
“What?” he barked into the phone.
Stiffness began working itself through my limbs like poison. It started in my hands, which went cold when Luke left my embrace. Something was fighting to swim to the surface of my mind, something that made my heart sink.
I froze in Luke’s arms. Natalie, how could you do this to me? The betrayal was like a slap to the face. How could she tell them about my foster parents? Fresh tears spilled down my cheeks and as Luke pulled away, there was sympathy on his face—but a little anger, too.
“She would never do this to me.”
He smiled without humor. “Just about anyone is capable of just about anything. I’ve had this happen to me countless times.” He stroked my hair. “I’m sorry about this. I know how it feels, believe me.”
I stumbled from the bathroom in disbelief, the horror of it all pounding in my brain. I dug into my purse and opened my cellphone and saw three texts:
You need to call me immediately
Don’t let Luke go on TMZ
Jessica, I swear I didn’t tell anyone
There were five missed calls and two voice messages. I played them both on speakerphone. Luke listened beside me, fury etched all over his face. The first message expressed her confusion, the second one was much more clear. “Jessica,” she said in a trembling voice. “I found out what happened. Ben saw the photos and called TMZ. They offered him a lot of money for your name and background, and then they found your foster parents and they said all of those terrible things.” She began to sob. “I’m so sorry, Jessica. I don’t think he meant for any of this to happen—”
I ended the voicemail. Somehow I felt emptier than I had before. My best friend’s fiancé sold me out, all because she couldn’t keep her trap shut. I looked at him desperately. “I never told Ben anything. Natalie knew about the website before I met you, so she must have told him. I told her not to.”
Luke shook his head and shrugged. He wouldn’t even look at me. He didn’t even want to touch me. I could feel his disgust for my friend, and contempt for me. “I’m going to bed.”
Is this it? Darkness swallowed the room as Luke turned off the light. I sat on the carpet, hugging my legs. I was too tired, but I didn’t want to join Luke in the bed, when he clearly didn’t want me anywhere around him. How can I fix this?
* * *
I woke up with my back aching as Luke shook me awake, his hand on my knee. It took several moments for me to remember why I felt so awful.
His hands stroked my shoulders. “Did you stay here all night?”
My eyes burned with fatigue. “I—didn’t think you wanted me around.”
Luke’s face was pained. “I was angry, but not at you.” He picked me up and kissed my throat. “Let’s get out of here.”
I nodded, my spirits rising slightly. So, we were still together, despite our secret being out in the open. My heart beat against my throat as he hugged me. I don’t deserve him.
It was hard to tell whether his aunt and uncle had seen the report on TMZ. By now, other gossip websites would be repeating the same story. I dressed as quickly as possible, eager to leave Chicago and return home. Return to what? To my volunteer job at the soup kitchen? To my ‘best friend’? The ten grand in my account—how long would it last? My heart pounded with anxiety. I did not want to return home; I didn’t want to look at Natalie and hear her useless apologies, or deal with the fact that I was still broke and jobless. I have Luke, I reminded myself. At least I have him.
I watched as Luke packed his bags with a bit more force than was necessary. For how long, though?
Luke was silent all the way to the airport, and didn’t speak a word to me during the flight. Like him, I was waiting for the axe to fall. I felt relief when the pilot announced that we were flying over Oakland and would be landing shortly. I looked down and saw the blue, freezing water of the bay. He glanced at his phone immediately after landing and stuffed it back into his jacket.
What now? As I followed Luke out of the plane, I wondered what the hell was going to happen. Now that the jig was up, would we still spend every waking moment together? Would Luke tell me that he had enough of me and that I should go home? The thought of being away from him, even for one night, made my throat tighten. I was used to being around him, comforted by his presence, and I needed his touch to be nearby.
I squeezed his hand as we waited in the freezing air for a cab.
“I know you must be anxious to go home, but I don’t want to be alone.”
He was actually asking me to stay with him. “Luke, I want to be with you.” I didn’t need to add that I had no desire to be in Natalie’s presence, not after what her fiancé did.
It annoyed me that there were paparazzi still clicking away at us outside SFO. I couldn’t wait to see the headlines: Luke Pardini seen at SFO with blonde escort, who does he think he’s kidding?
I bounced on my toes to give him a kiss. He drew my body into his and bit down on my lip as I swept my tongue across his mouth. My heart was pounding when he pulled away with a heated look on his face.
“I can’t wait to get home,” he whispered in my ear as the cab pulled up.
Twenty-minutes later, we stumbled up the steps of his Victorian home in Pacific Heights. It was one of the richest areas in San Francisco, where the homes had actual driveways, a luxury in the city. I barely had time to marvel at the beauty of his home before Luke grabbed my hand and pulled me upstairs. We ran up the steps and he pulled me to the side, his arms wrapping themselves fiercely around my waist. His mouth parted and I leaned forward to taste those lips that I fantasized about all day. His fingers dug into the waistband of my jeans and I slid my hands under his sweater. I dragged my thumb across his hard nipple and squeezed his back muscles as he slid around my backside. I could already feel his hardness grinding against my leg and my core heated, almost like I could feel him thrusting inside me already.
We were halfway to the bedroom and his mouth was tracing a downward path from my neck. Then the phone rang, jarring us out of our dance towards the bed. My face hot, I looked up at Luke who seemed to be debating whether to answer it or not. He let out an angry sigh and kissed my head.
“It might be work, just hold on.”
Damn it.
He picked the phone off the dresser and winced when he looked at the screen. I felt cold all over as I realized what the expression on his face meant. Crap.
“What?” he barked into the phone.
Stiffness began working itself through my limbs like poison. It started in my hands, which went cold when Luke left my embrace. Something was fighting to swim to the surface of my mind, something that made my heart sink.
