Broken and Screwed
Page 12
“Come on, Alex!” Eric gestured to me again. His smile seemed so genuine.
I was the worst person in the world.
As I sat, Sarah peeked up and gave me a cautious wave. “Hi, Alexandra.”
“Sarah.” My tone was equally as cautious. What was she going to say?
Then she cleared her throat. It was so soft and dainty sounding. All the bigger guys in the room positioned themselves towards our table. I knew they wanted to protect her still.
Her eyes were downcast as she played with her notebook. “How’s Jesse doing?”
From the slight hitch in her tone, I wanted to recoil backwards. She was still in love with him. I knew it. I was horrible. My voice came out raspy, “He’s…okay.”
She looked up. Her blue eyes were startlingly beautiful. They shimmered as they held mine captive. “Really?”
I jerked a shoulder up.
Another sad smile came from her before she dipped her head back down. “That’s good.”
I could hear the relief in her voice and cringed against it. She really still loved him.
“He deserves all the success that he’s had recently.”
I found myself nodding with her. “Yeah, you’re right. He’s doing really great.”
Then she grinned at Eric. “And you’re going to be as successful as him. You’ll lead our Wolverines to a state championship like him. I know it.”
“Yeah.” His grin slipped a bit and he leaned forward. The Adam’s apple in his throat bobbed up and down. As he cleared his throat, he glanced down at the floor. “I’ll sure try, I know that much.”
“What does she mean?”
He shrugged. “Nothing much.”
“Oh, that’s not true.” Sarah reached forward and placed her dainty hand over his. “He’s the starting forward this year. And our captain.”
“Really?”
He lifted another shoulder and looked away. “It don’t mean much.”
“It means a lot, Eric.” Sarah disagreed with him. Her sparkling eyes wouldn’t look away. “Jesse had big shoes for you to fill, but I have no doubt you’re up for the job. You’ll do wonderful.”
He laughed, but the sound was uneasy.
I straightened in my seat and reassessed Jesse’s perfect ex-girlfriend. Who was she kidding? I wasn’t intending to be mean, but Eric couldn’t fill Jesse’s shoes on his best day. Jesse was going to go professional. Everyone knew that. Eric would be lucky if he could get a scholarship at a lower level college. I might’ve checked out from a lot of school activities over the year, but that was the truth. Even I knew it. And for her to pump him up, make him feel as if he could do what Jesse could, told me a few things about Sarah Shastaine. For one, she wasn’t as nice as I thought. And two, did she want to set him up for failure? That wasn’t a friend in my mind.
But I bit my lip.
Eric seemed uncomfortable; he kept glancing at me. When I gave him a small smile, he relaxed, but his shoulders still drooped. And then I turned to Sarah. Her smile was still dazzling and the warmth in her eyes didn’t shift away.
Did she actually mean what she said? Did she not realize how harmful that was?
As she glanced at me one more time, my eyes widened. I had always thought of Sarah Shastaine as an angel, but now I wasn’t so sure. Then again, I had never asked why Jesse had suddenly ended his three year relationship with her. I always figured it was because of Ethan. It had been the same time he had stopped staying at our house and the beginning of when he turned from nice guy into cold hearted player last year.
Maybe there was another reason?
CHAPTER SIX
Two months went by quicker than I realized. Angie and I went to every football game. Justin played and Marissa cheered, so we supported both of them. I never told either of them of that weird day with Sarah in the cafeteria. We didn’t interact much after that. We had one class together and she was always partners with her two friends in the class. Eric was in the same class; he was usually my partner. And I thought about Jesse every day.
I tried not to. I really did, but I couldn’t help it.
The few times that my father was at home, he always had ESPN on in the background. And most of those times, there seemed to be a discussion about upcoming freshman that would be watched for the season. Jesse’s name was never left out. And then there was the time my mom had an entertainment gossip show on the television. Jesse’s dad had a movie premiere on the red carpet. The cameras always talked about Malcolm Hunt with a snapshot to Jesse, the future star basketball son of his.
That premiere turned into too many, along with all the other media interviews. It wasn’t customary to pay attention to the producer’s son, but when that son looked like Jesse Hunt and already had the reputation he did, most of them included his name in the interviews. And the same video footage of the time Jesse attended a premiere would roll. He’d been dressed in a black tuxedo with his hair still buzzed and the same unemotional look he’d had during his senior year. At least he hadn’t taken a date. I breathed easier when I saw he was solo, but then I told myself it didn’t mean a thing.
He never called. He hadn’t visited. There’d been no communication from him and I knew there wouldn’t be.
So when Homecoming rolled around at the end of October, I accepted Eric’s invitation to be his date, even though I wasn’t sure I should’ve. However, he didn’t seem to notice my reluctance or the guilt I carried after. He was all smiles every time in class and was eager to plan the details of the date.
“Hey, you.” Angie’s dressed swished around her as she carried it with one hand. She grimaced when she came into my bedroom and pouted at the sight of my bed. “We haven’t even gotten to the game and I already just want to fall asleep.”
“Look at you. You’re beautiful.”
And she was, in a princess-style green dress with taffeta underneath. It wasn’t Angie, but she said Justin picked it out. She aimed to please and that dress was going to please him. Her hair was her style. She had it piled high in a braid, intertwined with flowers. She always said she wanted it pretty, but simple and out of the way. It was that indeed.
She groaned as she turned my fan on and stood in front of it. “I don’t know about that, but I’m damn jealous right now. You’re lucky you didn’t make Homecoming Court otherwise you’d be wearing that gorgeous pink thing you’ve got in your closet instead of waiting until the last second to put it on. Oh no, you would be sweating your ass off right now, even though you know you’re going to be freezing it off at the game tonight.” A growl emitted from her throat as she cursed and sat on my bed. “I don’t give a rat’s ass if my dress is messed up. This thing looks ridiculous on me.”
I was the worst person in the world.
As I sat, Sarah peeked up and gave me a cautious wave. “Hi, Alexandra.”
“Sarah.” My tone was equally as cautious. What was she going to say?
Then she cleared her throat. It was so soft and dainty sounding. All the bigger guys in the room positioned themselves towards our table. I knew they wanted to protect her still.
Her eyes were downcast as she played with her notebook. “How’s Jesse doing?”
From the slight hitch in her tone, I wanted to recoil backwards. She was still in love with him. I knew it. I was horrible. My voice came out raspy, “He’s…okay.”
She looked up. Her blue eyes were startlingly beautiful. They shimmered as they held mine captive. “Really?”
I jerked a shoulder up.
Another sad smile came from her before she dipped her head back down. “That’s good.”
I could hear the relief in her voice and cringed against it. She really still loved him.
“He deserves all the success that he’s had recently.”
I found myself nodding with her. “Yeah, you’re right. He’s doing really great.”
Then she grinned at Eric. “And you’re going to be as successful as him. You’ll lead our Wolverines to a state championship like him. I know it.”
“Yeah.” His grin slipped a bit and he leaned forward. The Adam’s apple in his throat bobbed up and down. As he cleared his throat, he glanced down at the floor. “I’ll sure try, I know that much.”
“What does she mean?”
He shrugged. “Nothing much.”
“Oh, that’s not true.” Sarah reached forward and placed her dainty hand over his. “He’s the starting forward this year. And our captain.”
“Really?”
He lifted another shoulder and looked away. “It don’t mean much.”
“It means a lot, Eric.” Sarah disagreed with him. Her sparkling eyes wouldn’t look away. “Jesse had big shoes for you to fill, but I have no doubt you’re up for the job. You’ll do wonderful.”
He laughed, but the sound was uneasy.
I straightened in my seat and reassessed Jesse’s perfect ex-girlfriend. Who was she kidding? I wasn’t intending to be mean, but Eric couldn’t fill Jesse’s shoes on his best day. Jesse was going to go professional. Everyone knew that. Eric would be lucky if he could get a scholarship at a lower level college. I might’ve checked out from a lot of school activities over the year, but that was the truth. Even I knew it. And for her to pump him up, make him feel as if he could do what Jesse could, told me a few things about Sarah Shastaine. For one, she wasn’t as nice as I thought. And two, did she want to set him up for failure? That wasn’t a friend in my mind.
But I bit my lip.
Eric seemed uncomfortable; he kept glancing at me. When I gave him a small smile, he relaxed, but his shoulders still drooped. And then I turned to Sarah. Her smile was still dazzling and the warmth in her eyes didn’t shift away.
Did she actually mean what she said? Did she not realize how harmful that was?
As she glanced at me one more time, my eyes widened. I had always thought of Sarah Shastaine as an angel, but now I wasn’t so sure. Then again, I had never asked why Jesse had suddenly ended his three year relationship with her. I always figured it was because of Ethan. It had been the same time he had stopped staying at our house and the beginning of when he turned from nice guy into cold hearted player last year.
Maybe there was another reason?
CHAPTER SIX
Two months went by quicker than I realized. Angie and I went to every football game. Justin played and Marissa cheered, so we supported both of them. I never told either of them of that weird day with Sarah in the cafeteria. We didn’t interact much after that. We had one class together and she was always partners with her two friends in the class. Eric was in the same class; he was usually my partner. And I thought about Jesse every day.
I tried not to. I really did, but I couldn’t help it.
The few times that my father was at home, he always had ESPN on in the background. And most of those times, there seemed to be a discussion about upcoming freshman that would be watched for the season. Jesse’s name was never left out. And then there was the time my mom had an entertainment gossip show on the television. Jesse’s dad had a movie premiere on the red carpet. The cameras always talked about Malcolm Hunt with a snapshot to Jesse, the future star basketball son of his.
That premiere turned into too many, along with all the other media interviews. It wasn’t customary to pay attention to the producer’s son, but when that son looked like Jesse Hunt and already had the reputation he did, most of them included his name in the interviews. And the same video footage of the time Jesse attended a premiere would roll. He’d been dressed in a black tuxedo with his hair still buzzed and the same unemotional look he’d had during his senior year. At least he hadn’t taken a date. I breathed easier when I saw he was solo, but then I told myself it didn’t mean a thing.
He never called. He hadn’t visited. There’d been no communication from him and I knew there wouldn’t be.
So when Homecoming rolled around at the end of October, I accepted Eric’s invitation to be his date, even though I wasn’t sure I should’ve. However, he didn’t seem to notice my reluctance or the guilt I carried after. He was all smiles every time in class and was eager to plan the details of the date.
“Hey, you.” Angie’s dressed swished around her as she carried it with one hand. She grimaced when she came into my bedroom and pouted at the sight of my bed. “We haven’t even gotten to the game and I already just want to fall asleep.”
“Look at you. You’re beautiful.”
And she was, in a princess-style green dress with taffeta underneath. It wasn’t Angie, but she said Justin picked it out. She aimed to please and that dress was going to please him. Her hair was her style. She had it piled high in a braid, intertwined with flowers. She always said she wanted it pretty, but simple and out of the way. It was that indeed.
She groaned as she turned my fan on and stood in front of it. “I don’t know about that, but I’m damn jealous right now. You’re lucky you didn’t make Homecoming Court otherwise you’d be wearing that gorgeous pink thing you’ve got in your closet instead of waiting until the last second to put it on. Oh no, you would be sweating your ass off right now, even though you know you’re going to be freezing it off at the game tonight.” A growl emitted from her throat as she cursed and sat on my bed. “I don’t give a rat’s ass if my dress is messed up. This thing looks ridiculous on me.”
