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Chasing the Tide

Page 21

   


“Great! I’ll see you then!” I said a little louder than I meant to. I reached across the counter and grabbed her hand to shake it. She startled but shook my hand with a limp wrist.
I hurried out of the office building before making more of an ass of myself. If I could have, I would have clicked my heels.
I knew that an interview didn’t guarantee a job, but I felt encouraged. Hopeful even.
I drove back towards Wellston, feeling on top of the world.
I pulled out my cellphone and dialed, holding it to my ear.
“Professor Hendrick,” Flynn’s dry voice filled my ears.
“Hey!” I chirped. I wasn’t the peppy sort, but right now I was feeling all sorts of peppy.
“Hi, Ellie,” he said and then went silent. Phone conversation was definitely not one of his talents.
“I have an interview!” I told him.
“Good,” was all he said and I laughed. I couldn’t help it.
“Why are you laughing?” he asked, sounding confused.
“That’s all you can say? Good? You are a man of few words, Flynn Hendrick,” I joked.
“Well it is good. What else should I say? Should I tell you good luck? Because I figured I would tell you that before the interview.”
“No, good is fine. Great even. I just wanted to tell you. I’m pretty excited,” I said, turning into the parking lot of the local IGA grocery store.
“I can tell. Your voice is loud,” Flynn commented and I laughed again.
“Yeah, I am being loud. Look, I’m making dinner tonight. You’re coming home early right?” I asked him.
“Yes. My last class is at three-thirty. I have to go to my office and pick up some papers and then walk to my car. That will take about twenty minutes. It’s a fifteen-minute drive home. So I should be home around four-oh-five,” Flynn stated.
“Four-oh-five. Okay. That sounds good.” I got out of my car and locked the door.
“You’re making dinner? Can you cook?” Flynn asked and I wasn’t insulted. He was right. My culinary skills were questionable at best.
“I’m sure I can make something you will eat. Your palate isn’t very refined.”
“I have chicken salad if it’s gross,” Flynn said, not meaning his words as an insult and I didn’t take them that way.
“It’s always good to have a back up plan. But trust me. I’ll make you something amazing,” I promised.
“I trust you, Ellie,” Flynn replied and I felt warm to the tips of my toes because I knew he meant it.
He trusted me.
Inexplicably he always had. Even when I hadn’t deserved it, he had trusted me.
“Okay, well, let me pick up a few things. I’ll see you when you get home,” I said, walking toward the front of the store.
“I’ll see you at four-oh-five,” Flynn replied.
“Can’t wait.” I paused. “I love you, Flynn,” I said quietly.
There was a moment of silence and I waited, like I always did, wondering if this time he’d finally say it back. It’s not that I ever doubted that Flynn loved me. He showed me in a thousand, beautiful ways how he felt about me.
But a girl couldn’t help but want the words. Particularly a girl who had never heard them from anyone else.
“Bye,” he said after a beat and I couldn’t squelch the tiny stab of hurt.
“Bye,” I repeated and hung up the phone before my disappointment could ruin my good mood.
I walked into the grocery store and grabbed a basket. The store wasn’t very crowded, and I gave a cursory glance around, thankful when I didn’t recognize anyone.
I had no idea whether any of my former friends were still in Wellston. I hadn’t thought much of Stu Wooten, Shane Nolan, or Reggie Fisher over the years. We had never been the sort of friends to send letters and exchange Christmas presents. We had been the hard partying, get busted together sort of acquaintances.
I had a strong suspicion that one, if not all, had ended up in jail at some point. Especially after what Jeb had told me about Stu, I didn’t expect to see him out in general population.
But Dania was a different story.
Before I had left to go to school she had shown glimmers of becoming someone better. Someone less selfish. She had just signed over her parental rights to her newborn son after he became a ward of the state. Having been born with a severe heart defect as a result of her chronic alcohol and drug use, social services had placed him on protective custody only hours after being transferred to the Intensive Neonatal Unit.
It had been the first time Dania had made a choice that was about someone else and not about her. I had been proud of her. Despite the horrific situation she had created, she was finally accepting responsibility and doing what was best for the little boy who had never been her priority.
But after I had left Wellston I had purposefully left Dania Blevins and her mountain of drama behind me.
There were times I felt guilty for the way I had dropped her. But I also knew that out of everyone, she was the one person who could take me back to that place I never wanted to be again. She was my link to the old Ellie. She made it all to easy to be that girl.
And I hated that girl.
But I wasn’t thinking of Dania, or Stu, or Reggie, as I started shopping for ingredients to make dinner. I decided to make a simple lasagna.
Flynn was picky but I knew he liked pasta.
I was in my own little world, not thinking about much beyond my upcoming job interview and of course Flynn. I felt happy as I stood in the middle of a grocery store in the last place I had ever wanted to be again.