Christmas on 4th Street
Page 5
“I ended up having to be admitted myself,” he grumbled, then swore. “What was I thinking?”
“You weren’t,” his brother reminded him. “You were reacting.”
“Not well and not in the right way.” There was no point in reliving a past he couldn’t change. “I was lucky—there’s no permanent damage. It hurts like a son of a bitch. My CO told me it was time to go home on leave, so here I am.” Otherwise he would have worked through the holidays, like he did every year. He always volunteered to stay so others could be with their families. This time he hadn’t had a choice.
“I’m sorry you got hurt, but I’m glad you’re here,” Gideon told him.
“You want someone to take the pressure off with Dad around.”
“That, too. Although I figure we can throw Carter in his direction. From what everyone tells me, grandparents can’t resist grandkids.”
An interesting plan. “You’re not worried about what the old man might do to your kid?”
Gideon smiled. “Nope. Felicia will protect him. She’s tough and fierce. I wouldn’t want to go up against her.”
“Good to know. Then I’ll stay out of her way.”
“Just don’t threaten Carter and me and you’ll be fine. Oh, I guess the dog falls under that umbrella now.”
Gabriel started to say something, but the word umbrella reminded him of the woman he’d met earlier. Noelle, who’d been willing to defend her friend’s house with nothing more than bravado and an umbrella.
He was glad she’d seen the error of her attack. Had there been a real intruder, she would have been in trouble. But he’d been no threat and he had to admit she’d been an unexpected distraction.
For a moment he allowed himself to wonder how his evening would have been different if she’d been the one sitting out here with him instead of his brother. He grinned. For one thing, they wouldn’t be so far apart. And they sure wouldn’t be talking.
“What are your plans for after the holidays?” Gideon asked. “Staying in?”
By in his brother meant the army. His smile faded.
“I don’t know,” he admitted.
He’d always planned to stick around long enough to get his twenty years. He would still be young enough to move into a regular job at a hospital. But lately, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. Or could.
It was the flights, he thought grimly. Those years of shepherding injured soldiers from Iraq and Afghanistan. They were in no position to be moved, but needed the more intense care only a permanent military hospital could provide. So they were patched up and flown out. He and his team spent the hours dealing with one crisis after another. The conditions were cramped, the patients critical. Space and weight limited the equipment.
When he hadn’t been on the flights, he’d been working in field hospitals. Those on the front line suffered from PTSD, while those who cared for them battled compassion fatigue. Watching the endless parade of injured, continually fighting against impossible odds without ever knowing who lived and who died, left a person drained. Even his rotations to the hospital in Germany didn’t provide much relief.
Gabriel knew that was where he was now. Exhausted and empty. Which increased the likelihood that a person made mistakes and he had the hand injury to prove it. He needed to get away. His brother’s invitation had provided a place. Going to spend time with the family at the holidays required no explanation.
The door to the house slid open. Felicia stepped out into the night. She crossed to Gideon and placed her hand on his shoulder. He put his fingers on hers.
“I’m sorry to interrupt,” she said, her voice quiet. “I wanted to give the two of you plenty of time to connect. A strong relationship between brothers would be beneficial to each of you and it would provide Carter with a view of how siblings interact.”
Gideon smiled. “How could I have resisted you?”
Felicia smiled. “You didn’t—at least not physically. It was your resistance at giving your heart that was the cause of your delay in admitting your feelings. I’m glad you’re more open now We’re going to have children and I want Carter to be comfortable as a brother, but also a member of the family. I don’t want him to worry he’s being pushed out.”
“Which is not what you came out to tell us.”
“No. Your parents just called.”
Gabriel felt the tension in his shoulders. “Giving us an ETA?”
Felicia looked at him. “Yes. They’re so excited about meeting me and Carter that they decided to drive straight through. They’re only an hour or so outside of town.” She returned her attention to her husband. “I knew you’d want to mentally prepare for their arrival.”
Gideon’s humor faded. He was on his feet in a second, already moving toward the far end of the deck. About fifteen yards away, he stopped and turned back.
Gabriel recognized the need to bolt. He was feeling it, too. Unfortunately he didn’t have anywhere to go. Although he remembered seeing a couple of hotels in town.
No, he told himself. He wouldn’t leave tonight. But the morning was a whole other matter.
* * *
The Boylan family could trace their service roots back to the Civil War. Each generation of Boylan men enlisted. They weren’t officers, they were never famous for their exploits, but they gave to their country and had the medals to show for their courage.
Gideon had wanted to be a soldier from the time he was little, but Gabriel had wanted something else. As a boy he’d dreamed of seeing the world, of visiting great museums and studying other cultures. Gideon had been loud and athletic. Gabriel had preferred reading to playing in the tree-house fort their father had built in one of their many backyards. He’d preferred theater to baseball and debate to football.
The summer he and his brother turned fifteen, his father had taken him for a long hike. When they were alone in the woods, the older Boylan had demanded to know if Gabriel was gay.
Gabriel knew he was different from his brother and his father, but there were other guys like him. Guys who wanted more than hitting a ball. And it had nothing to do with whether or not he liked girls.
He’d said he wasn’t and had known his father didn’t believe him. On the bright side, when Gideon got caught with a cheerleader in the back of the family car, he’d been grounded for a month. When Gabriel had been found with the pastor’s daughter in a very compromising situation, he’d gotten a slap on the back and unexpected praise. So there had been compensations.
But on the whole, it hadn’t been easy being his father’s son. Now, all these years later, as he waited in the cold for his parents to arrive, Gabriel told himself there was no need to head for the hills. Or in this case, the mountains. He might not have his brother’s Special Forces training, but he figured he could make a run at surviving for a few weeks on his own. Not that disappearing that way was an option.
They were all lined up on the porch. Even Webster, who had no idea why the pack was shivering in the cold but happy to be a part of things.
An aging Ford Explorer pulled up in front of the house and parked. Gabriel watched the couple that stepped out.
His first thought was that they were older than he remembered. It had been years and the time showed—more on his father than his mother. His second thought was that his father seemed smaller somehow. Not the imposing figure he’d always been.
It wasn’t easy to grow up with a drill sergeant for a father. There were expectations for behavior in the community that other kids didn’t have. Norman Boylan had always been more bogeyman than parent, at least when Gabriel had been young. Now, looking at the man, he realized that he was at least two inches taller. His father wasn’t a threat anymore—he was little more than a man close to sixty who had once been the center of his sons’ small world.
Gabriel’s mother, Karen, was still pretty. There’d always been a softness to her and he saw that now as she took in the sight of both her boys. Then her gaze shifted to Carter and tears filled her blue eyes.
She’d been the one who comforted, the one who tried to explain why their father had made the rules he had and enforced them with an iron fist. Gideon had accepted her hugs and kisses, then run off, healed. But Gabriel had resisted, asking why instead of apologizing for their father, she didn’t try to change him. He remembered she’d said changing a man wasn’t so easy and when he got older he would understand.
Felicia and Carter were the first ones down the stairs. Karen hugged her future daughter-in-law, then put her hands on Carter’s shoulders. Webster joined them, racing to Norman’s side. Gabriel half expected his father to ignore the bounding puppy. Instead, he crouched down and petted him, then ordered him to sit. Webster, like any young recruit, did what he was told.
“We’ll go into town and get drunk,” Gideon said as he and Gabriel started down the stairs.
“How about we get drunk in Morocco?”
Gideon flashed him a smile, then stepped onto the path and held out his hand to his father. Gabriel did the same. What they said was “Dad” but the tone was “sir.”
Norman didn’t try to hug them. He studied each of them in turn, stepping back when their mother rushed toward them.
“My boys,” she cried, holding out her arms to them and pulling them close.
She hung on for a long time. Gabriel gently patted her back, waiting for all the emotion to pass. Finally she stepped away and wiped her tears.
“I can’t believe how long it’s been since we were all together,” she said, her voice trembling. “This is so wonderful.” She turned to Felicia. “Thank you for inviting us.”
“We’re happy to have you,” Felicia murmured.
Gabriel waited. From what he’d seen, Felicia usually said more. A statement or two on the importance of the family unit or an unexpected observation about connection. But there was nothing else.
Gideon leaned close. “She’s trying to tone things down for the folks.”
“They’re going to find out you’re marrying a genius sooner or later.”
“She wants it later so she doesn’t scare them off.”
“She’s great. They’ll like her.”
“That’s what I said,” Gideon told him. “But she won’t listen.”
Gabriel wanted to take her aside and point out that Gideon wasn’t looking for their approval, but doubted that would make her feel better. She would have to figure it out for herself.
They moved into the house. Norman fell back to keep pace with Gabriel.
“Still slacking off at the cushy hospital job?” his father asked, slapping him on the back.
Gabriel thought about the horrors he saw, the hours he worked and how there was never an easy day. He remembered the countless times he’d been forced to tell a brave, young solder that yes, his leg, arm, eye or more was gone. He thought of the screams and the blood and knew there was no point in talking about any of it.
“Still slacking off,” he said, shutting the door behind him.
* * *
Noelle hurried toward Brew-haha. Her friends had invited her for coffee before she opened her store. While she was busy, she’d never thought to say no. Since moving to Fool’s Gold, she’d met wonderful women who were very much a part of her life. They had sustained her in ways they didn’t even know about.
She walked in the coffee house right on time and saw that Patience, Felicia and Isabel were already at a table together. There was a plate of muffins, a latte at each place and a slightly guilty expression on each of their faces. Noelle had no idea what was up but she knew the guilt didn’t come from eating an extra muffin that morning.
“Hi,” she said as she took her seat. “What’s up?”
Patience slumped in her seat. “I’m so bad at this. I just can’t keep a secret. Not from anyone I care about. I’m a blabber. It doesn’t matter if I don’t say anything—it shows on my face.”
Felicia studied her. “In the gambling world, it’s called a tell. The twitch of a muscle or a nostril flare. I could show you what you’re doing and teach you how to control your involuntary reaction.”
“Or she could simply accept the fault and move on,” Isabel said cheerfully. She picked up her latte. “I’m just saying.”
“I don’t think I’m very trainable,” Patience admitted.
Noelle relaxed and reached for a muffin. Obviously whatever was up with her friends wasn’t a crisis.
“If you want to try, I’m here for you,” Felicia said, then she cleared her throat. “Gideon’s parents arrived last night.”
“They weren’t due for a couple of days,” Isabel said. “Or did I get that wrong?”
“They were early,” Felicia admitted.
Noelle thought about Gabriel and how tired he’d been yesterday. She didn’t know the man very well, but from the little she’d seen, he wasn’t exactly a family kind of guy.
“Did everything go okay?” she asked.
“It was awkward,” Felicia admitted. “Norman and Karen seem very nice, but there hasn’t been much contact between all of them in a while, so that makes a difficult situation worse. Carter is thrilled and Webster offers an excellent distraction. We talked for a couple of hours, then we all went to bed.”
She held on to her mug. “This morning Norman was up and fixing breakfast at six. I found him easy to talk to but then I don’t have any kind of past with him. It’s going to be more difficult for Gideon and his brother.”
“You weren’t,” his brother reminded him. “You were reacting.”
“Not well and not in the right way.” There was no point in reliving a past he couldn’t change. “I was lucky—there’s no permanent damage. It hurts like a son of a bitch. My CO told me it was time to go home on leave, so here I am.” Otherwise he would have worked through the holidays, like he did every year. He always volunteered to stay so others could be with their families. This time he hadn’t had a choice.
“I’m sorry you got hurt, but I’m glad you’re here,” Gideon told him.
“You want someone to take the pressure off with Dad around.”
“That, too. Although I figure we can throw Carter in his direction. From what everyone tells me, grandparents can’t resist grandkids.”
An interesting plan. “You’re not worried about what the old man might do to your kid?”
Gideon smiled. “Nope. Felicia will protect him. She’s tough and fierce. I wouldn’t want to go up against her.”
“Good to know. Then I’ll stay out of her way.”
“Just don’t threaten Carter and me and you’ll be fine. Oh, I guess the dog falls under that umbrella now.”
Gabriel started to say something, but the word umbrella reminded him of the woman he’d met earlier. Noelle, who’d been willing to defend her friend’s house with nothing more than bravado and an umbrella.
He was glad she’d seen the error of her attack. Had there been a real intruder, she would have been in trouble. But he’d been no threat and he had to admit she’d been an unexpected distraction.
For a moment he allowed himself to wonder how his evening would have been different if she’d been the one sitting out here with him instead of his brother. He grinned. For one thing, they wouldn’t be so far apart. And they sure wouldn’t be talking.
“What are your plans for after the holidays?” Gideon asked. “Staying in?”
By in his brother meant the army. His smile faded.
“I don’t know,” he admitted.
He’d always planned to stick around long enough to get his twenty years. He would still be young enough to move into a regular job at a hospital. But lately, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. Or could.
It was the flights, he thought grimly. Those years of shepherding injured soldiers from Iraq and Afghanistan. They were in no position to be moved, but needed the more intense care only a permanent military hospital could provide. So they were patched up and flown out. He and his team spent the hours dealing with one crisis after another. The conditions were cramped, the patients critical. Space and weight limited the equipment.
When he hadn’t been on the flights, he’d been working in field hospitals. Those on the front line suffered from PTSD, while those who cared for them battled compassion fatigue. Watching the endless parade of injured, continually fighting against impossible odds without ever knowing who lived and who died, left a person drained. Even his rotations to the hospital in Germany didn’t provide much relief.
Gabriel knew that was where he was now. Exhausted and empty. Which increased the likelihood that a person made mistakes and he had the hand injury to prove it. He needed to get away. His brother’s invitation had provided a place. Going to spend time with the family at the holidays required no explanation.
The door to the house slid open. Felicia stepped out into the night. She crossed to Gideon and placed her hand on his shoulder. He put his fingers on hers.
“I’m sorry to interrupt,” she said, her voice quiet. “I wanted to give the two of you plenty of time to connect. A strong relationship between brothers would be beneficial to each of you and it would provide Carter with a view of how siblings interact.”
Gideon smiled. “How could I have resisted you?”
Felicia smiled. “You didn’t—at least not physically. It was your resistance at giving your heart that was the cause of your delay in admitting your feelings. I’m glad you’re more open now We’re going to have children and I want Carter to be comfortable as a brother, but also a member of the family. I don’t want him to worry he’s being pushed out.”
“Which is not what you came out to tell us.”
“No. Your parents just called.”
Gabriel felt the tension in his shoulders. “Giving us an ETA?”
Felicia looked at him. “Yes. They’re so excited about meeting me and Carter that they decided to drive straight through. They’re only an hour or so outside of town.” She returned her attention to her husband. “I knew you’d want to mentally prepare for their arrival.”
Gideon’s humor faded. He was on his feet in a second, already moving toward the far end of the deck. About fifteen yards away, he stopped and turned back.
Gabriel recognized the need to bolt. He was feeling it, too. Unfortunately he didn’t have anywhere to go. Although he remembered seeing a couple of hotels in town.
No, he told himself. He wouldn’t leave tonight. But the morning was a whole other matter.
* * *
The Boylan family could trace their service roots back to the Civil War. Each generation of Boylan men enlisted. They weren’t officers, they were never famous for their exploits, but they gave to their country and had the medals to show for their courage.
Gideon had wanted to be a soldier from the time he was little, but Gabriel had wanted something else. As a boy he’d dreamed of seeing the world, of visiting great museums and studying other cultures. Gideon had been loud and athletic. Gabriel had preferred reading to playing in the tree-house fort their father had built in one of their many backyards. He’d preferred theater to baseball and debate to football.
The summer he and his brother turned fifteen, his father had taken him for a long hike. When they were alone in the woods, the older Boylan had demanded to know if Gabriel was gay.
Gabriel knew he was different from his brother and his father, but there were other guys like him. Guys who wanted more than hitting a ball. And it had nothing to do with whether or not he liked girls.
He’d said he wasn’t and had known his father didn’t believe him. On the bright side, when Gideon got caught with a cheerleader in the back of the family car, he’d been grounded for a month. When Gabriel had been found with the pastor’s daughter in a very compromising situation, he’d gotten a slap on the back and unexpected praise. So there had been compensations.
But on the whole, it hadn’t been easy being his father’s son. Now, all these years later, as he waited in the cold for his parents to arrive, Gabriel told himself there was no need to head for the hills. Or in this case, the mountains. He might not have his brother’s Special Forces training, but he figured he could make a run at surviving for a few weeks on his own. Not that disappearing that way was an option.
They were all lined up on the porch. Even Webster, who had no idea why the pack was shivering in the cold but happy to be a part of things.
An aging Ford Explorer pulled up in front of the house and parked. Gabriel watched the couple that stepped out.
His first thought was that they were older than he remembered. It had been years and the time showed—more on his father than his mother. His second thought was that his father seemed smaller somehow. Not the imposing figure he’d always been.
It wasn’t easy to grow up with a drill sergeant for a father. There were expectations for behavior in the community that other kids didn’t have. Norman Boylan had always been more bogeyman than parent, at least when Gabriel had been young. Now, looking at the man, he realized that he was at least two inches taller. His father wasn’t a threat anymore—he was little more than a man close to sixty who had once been the center of his sons’ small world.
Gabriel’s mother, Karen, was still pretty. There’d always been a softness to her and he saw that now as she took in the sight of both her boys. Then her gaze shifted to Carter and tears filled her blue eyes.
She’d been the one who comforted, the one who tried to explain why their father had made the rules he had and enforced them with an iron fist. Gideon had accepted her hugs and kisses, then run off, healed. But Gabriel had resisted, asking why instead of apologizing for their father, she didn’t try to change him. He remembered she’d said changing a man wasn’t so easy and when he got older he would understand.
Felicia and Carter were the first ones down the stairs. Karen hugged her future daughter-in-law, then put her hands on Carter’s shoulders. Webster joined them, racing to Norman’s side. Gabriel half expected his father to ignore the bounding puppy. Instead, he crouched down and petted him, then ordered him to sit. Webster, like any young recruit, did what he was told.
“We’ll go into town and get drunk,” Gideon said as he and Gabriel started down the stairs.
“How about we get drunk in Morocco?”
Gideon flashed him a smile, then stepped onto the path and held out his hand to his father. Gabriel did the same. What they said was “Dad” but the tone was “sir.”
Norman didn’t try to hug them. He studied each of them in turn, stepping back when their mother rushed toward them.
“My boys,” she cried, holding out her arms to them and pulling them close.
She hung on for a long time. Gabriel gently patted her back, waiting for all the emotion to pass. Finally she stepped away and wiped her tears.
“I can’t believe how long it’s been since we were all together,” she said, her voice trembling. “This is so wonderful.” She turned to Felicia. “Thank you for inviting us.”
“We’re happy to have you,” Felicia murmured.
Gabriel waited. From what he’d seen, Felicia usually said more. A statement or two on the importance of the family unit or an unexpected observation about connection. But there was nothing else.
Gideon leaned close. “She’s trying to tone things down for the folks.”
“They’re going to find out you’re marrying a genius sooner or later.”
“She wants it later so she doesn’t scare them off.”
“She’s great. They’ll like her.”
“That’s what I said,” Gideon told him. “But she won’t listen.”
Gabriel wanted to take her aside and point out that Gideon wasn’t looking for their approval, but doubted that would make her feel better. She would have to figure it out for herself.
They moved into the house. Norman fell back to keep pace with Gabriel.
“Still slacking off at the cushy hospital job?” his father asked, slapping him on the back.
Gabriel thought about the horrors he saw, the hours he worked and how there was never an easy day. He remembered the countless times he’d been forced to tell a brave, young solder that yes, his leg, arm, eye or more was gone. He thought of the screams and the blood and knew there was no point in talking about any of it.
“Still slacking off,” he said, shutting the door behind him.
* * *
Noelle hurried toward Brew-haha. Her friends had invited her for coffee before she opened her store. While she was busy, she’d never thought to say no. Since moving to Fool’s Gold, she’d met wonderful women who were very much a part of her life. They had sustained her in ways they didn’t even know about.
She walked in the coffee house right on time and saw that Patience, Felicia and Isabel were already at a table together. There was a plate of muffins, a latte at each place and a slightly guilty expression on each of their faces. Noelle had no idea what was up but she knew the guilt didn’t come from eating an extra muffin that morning.
“Hi,” she said as she took her seat. “What’s up?”
Patience slumped in her seat. “I’m so bad at this. I just can’t keep a secret. Not from anyone I care about. I’m a blabber. It doesn’t matter if I don’t say anything—it shows on my face.”
Felicia studied her. “In the gambling world, it’s called a tell. The twitch of a muscle or a nostril flare. I could show you what you’re doing and teach you how to control your involuntary reaction.”
“Or she could simply accept the fault and move on,” Isabel said cheerfully. She picked up her latte. “I’m just saying.”
“I don’t think I’m very trainable,” Patience admitted.
Noelle relaxed and reached for a muffin. Obviously whatever was up with her friends wasn’t a crisis.
“If you want to try, I’m here for you,” Felicia said, then she cleared her throat. “Gideon’s parents arrived last night.”
“They weren’t due for a couple of days,” Isabel said. “Or did I get that wrong?”
“They were early,” Felicia admitted.
Noelle thought about Gabriel and how tired he’d been yesterday. She didn’t know the man very well, but from the little she’d seen, he wasn’t exactly a family kind of guy.
“Did everything go okay?” she asked.
“It was awkward,” Felicia admitted. “Norman and Karen seem very nice, but there hasn’t been much contact between all of them in a while, so that makes a difficult situation worse. Carter is thrilled and Webster offers an excellent distraction. We talked for a couple of hours, then we all went to bed.”
She held on to her mug. “This morning Norman was up and fixing breakfast at six. I found him easy to talk to but then I don’t have any kind of past with him. It’s going to be more difficult for Gideon and his brother.”
