Crossroads

Page 53

“And what does it mean? You’re suddenly gay? You’re in a relationship with a man? Or is it just a game? An experiment? What is it?”
The questions rained down on him, pummeled him like a hurricane-strength storm. He wasn’t ready to answer all of these questions. He cared about Nick. He wanted to keep doing what he was doing with him. Nick meant something to him, that’s all he knew. He couldn’t say where it would go or what it meant. “It’s just...I don’t know. We’re figuring it out as we go along. Can’t that be good enough for now?” How were they supposed to have all the answers right now? This was new for both of them.
His dad sighed. “Here, take this. Your mother wanted you to look at it, though I’m not sure it really matters anymore.”
His dad opened the car door to get in.
“Wait. Can we talk about this inside?” He didn’t think his dad would right now, but he really fucking needed that. He needed his family to be on his side about Nick, because the man meant more to him than he could put into words.
“Not right now. I need to sort through this. I don’t understand you, Bryce. I don’t know what the hell is going on. Right now, I just need to try and work through what the hell I just saw. I’m not telling your mother, but you need to, Bryce, and soon. She deserves to know about Christi.”
Without another word, his dad got in his car and drove away. Bryce stood there, watching him go.
***
It wasn’t long after Nick had gone into the house that there was a soft knock on his door. He hadn’t stopped pacing, his heart in his throat.
Nick pulled the door open. “I’m so fucking sorry. I can’t believe I didn’t close the door all the way.”
Bryce didn’t look at him as he walked in. “Nah, I planned on telling them this weekend anyway. This just sped up the process.” Bryce walked over, leaned against the back of the couch and dropped his head. “Fuck,” he groaned out, which told Nick that it hadn’t gone well.
“What happened?” Nick wasn’t sure he wanted to know. If Bryce’s family didn’t take it well, that gave him no hope for his own. The Tanners were much more accepting than Nick’s family ever could be.
“He had all these fucking questions that I didn’t have answers for. I asked if we could talk more, and he said no and left. That’s not my father. He’s the levelheaded one. He lets us live our own lives and leaves the rest to Mom.”
He’d never seen Bryce so tense before...so down. It didn’t fit, didn’t compute; it wasn’t the Bryce he knew. Nick got it, but it still left a hole in his gut. He wanted to go to Bryce, hug him, kiss him, and tell him it would be okay, but he didn’t know if he should. He didn’t know if it would help. “I should have gone with you.”
“No, you shouldn’t have, but thank you for wanting to.” Bryce pushed off the couch. “I’m not going to work today. I need...I need to take my bike out, go for a ride; clear my fucking head and try to make sense of all of this.”
“I can call off, too. I’ll go with you if you—”
“No,” Bryce cut him off. “I just...it’s better if I go alone. This afternoon when my dad gets off work, I’m going to head over and talk to him and Mom. I have no clue what the fuck I’m going to say, but I need to speak with them. I’ll...I’ll call you later.”
Bryce left, and he didn’t try to stop him. When he heard Bryce’s motorcycle rev to life, he was still standing in the same spot.
This wasn’t just about the fun anymore—wasn’t about orgasms and hiding out in their houses together naked. It was all real, and they had to decide how far they were willing to go for each other...what they really wanted. So far, Nick wasn’t so sure how it was going.
***
Nick cleaned his already clean house.
Then cooked food he had no plan on eating.
A couple of hours later, when he hadn’t heard from Bryce, he got into his car and drove to his mom’s house. He had no fucking clue why, or what he planned to say when he got there, but he felt the need to go. Even though his stomach was in knots the whole time.
The ride was quick, and before he knew it, Nick was knocking on her door.
“Nicholas! It’s so good to see you. You never surprise me with a visit. My one and only boy and you rarely come and see me.” She gave him a tight hug, and Nick returned it, holding on longer than he usually did. She was a good mom, strong, and she loved her family. Maybe loved them a little too much. She’d spoiled both Nick and his dad, expected her girls to do the same with their husbands because that’s how she’d been raised. She took what she thought were appropriate gender roles very seriously.