Desertion
Page 105
“You need to do that more often, Bell. I’d be a happy man if you sucked me like that every morning.” I kiss one ass cheek and then the next.
“Ha! You wish.” She rolls to her side, falling to her back. I come up on my elbow and look up her body. A pink blush coats her skin and a sense of pride washes over me knowing I put it there. That shit doesn’t get old.
“Move in with me,” I blurt, not thinking before I speak. It’s been a month since Vegas, a month of winning Bell back, of proving to her how much I want her in my life.
“What?” She looks up at me. Her eyes grow wide as she tries to process what I just asked.
“Move in.” I shrug, trying to play off my anxiety. Fuck, what if she says no? Ever since I’ve got her back, I’ve wanted more—more time, more connection. Between the clubhouse and her place with Lissy, we barely have a moment alone.
“Here?” She looks around my clubhouse room, her tone disbelieving.
“No, we’ll get our own place. I’m done living here. And I don’t like being quiet at your place with Lissy around. I want our own place. You and me.”
“Are you sure you’re ready for this, Jesse?” She sits up and I follow her.
“It’s not marriage, or a baby, Bell. It’s you and me moving in, sweetheart.” I try to reason with her. Yeah, I see those things in our future, but I want more of her first. Of us.
“I know, Jesse.” She smiles. “I just want you to be sure. You know I love you, and I trust you love me too. Where we are at right now, I’m happy. I don’t need anything more.” She sits up, leans forward and places her soft lips to mine.
“I know you are, but this isn’t about me proving how much I want or love you. I just want to live with my woman.” I pull her forward, dragging her back down with me and let her body cover mine. My woman. Fuck, it feels good to say that.
“I just wasn’t expecting to be moving so fast, Jesse.”
“Fast?” I laugh and shake my head. “Jesus, woman. This isn’t fast, trust me. You’re lucky I let you leave my bed.” I’m only half joking. Each day that passes since having her back in my life is another day of moving forward, of letting myself accept my past and be okay with everything. Of trusting her with my issues, of dealing with the demons I carry.
“You can house train me. I’ve never lived with a woman before.” I give her more incentive. I know she won’t deny me, but I want her to understand how big this is for me.
“Oh, yay me.” She rolls her eyes. I pinch her ass, and then hold her tighter when she tries to squirm out of my arms.
“Don’t act cool. You want this,” I challenge. Yeah, in the beginning she was apprehensive. After the wedding, we talked and decided to take things slowly, but slow went out the window the moment we came home.
“I do, Jesse. I’ve never hid that from you. I just want you to be ready.”
“I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t ready, Bell.”
“This is true.” She pulls back and watches me closely. I move my hand to her nape and drag her to my mouth. She doesn’t fight me, opening when my tongue seeks its entry. I kiss her for a moment, letting her taste wash over me before pulling my tongue back.
“Don’t make me beg, woman,” I whisper into her mouth. She smiles against me and I know in that second what her answer is.
“House train you?” she asks, lifting her brow.
“Jesse!” Beau knocks on the door halting me from answering.
“What?” I shake my head at the interruption. “We wouldn’t have this,” I whisper to Bell and wait for his reply.
“Your brother is here.”
“Tell him to fuck off!” I shout back, not in the mood to leave the bed. Things with Jackson have been a lot better, both of us finally finding a happy ground to respect each other on. The last few weeks we’ve barely seen each other with his workload, but he’s been checking in when he can.
“He knew you would say that, so he said to tell you to fuck off right back and that you will want to hear what he has to say.”
Rolling my eyes at Beau and my pain-in-the-ass brother’s words, I look back to Bell.
“Move in with me,” I ask her again, needing an answer with words.
“You should go to your brother,” she replies, her lips dancing with her amusement at my torment.
“Not till you say yes.”
“Ugggh, you’re such a pest, Jesse.” She shakes her head, but the dimple in her cheek deepens as she fights her smile.
“But you love me.” I roll and pin her under me. She fights my hands, but I manage to pin them in my grasp.
“I do.” She gives up her struggle.
“Do you feel safe with me?” I ask, needing to know.
“I do.” She blinks and my heart squeezes knowing how far we’ve come. Yeah, I still have dreams, but they’re much more controlled and Bell knows how to handle them.
“So say you’ll move in with me, I’ll go see my annoying brother, then I can come back and fuck you.” I pepper kisses along her jaw. Her head rolls to the side and her eyes flutter closed with each touch. A soft moan leaves her lips, but it’s not the answer I’m looking for.
“Say it,” I growl before nipping harder at her neck.
“Yes, okay, you big bossy boots.”
Her words set my heart on fire, so I pull back, and watch her for a minute. “Yeah?” I wait for her answer again. Once isn’t enough.
“Ha! You wish.” She rolls to her side, falling to her back. I come up on my elbow and look up her body. A pink blush coats her skin and a sense of pride washes over me knowing I put it there. That shit doesn’t get old.
“Move in with me,” I blurt, not thinking before I speak. It’s been a month since Vegas, a month of winning Bell back, of proving to her how much I want her in my life.
“What?” She looks up at me. Her eyes grow wide as she tries to process what I just asked.
“Move in.” I shrug, trying to play off my anxiety. Fuck, what if she says no? Ever since I’ve got her back, I’ve wanted more—more time, more connection. Between the clubhouse and her place with Lissy, we barely have a moment alone.
“Here?” She looks around my clubhouse room, her tone disbelieving.
“No, we’ll get our own place. I’m done living here. And I don’t like being quiet at your place with Lissy around. I want our own place. You and me.”
“Are you sure you’re ready for this, Jesse?” She sits up and I follow her.
“It’s not marriage, or a baby, Bell. It’s you and me moving in, sweetheart.” I try to reason with her. Yeah, I see those things in our future, but I want more of her first. Of us.
“I know, Jesse.” She smiles. “I just want you to be sure. You know I love you, and I trust you love me too. Where we are at right now, I’m happy. I don’t need anything more.” She sits up, leans forward and places her soft lips to mine.
“I know you are, but this isn’t about me proving how much I want or love you. I just want to live with my woman.” I pull her forward, dragging her back down with me and let her body cover mine. My woman. Fuck, it feels good to say that.
“I just wasn’t expecting to be moving so fast, Jesse.”
“Fast?” I laugh and shake my head. “Jesus, woman. This isn’t fast, trust me. You’re lucky I let you leave my bed.” I’m only half joking. Each day that passes since having her back in my life is another day of moving forward, of letting myself accept my past and be okay with everything. Of trusting her with my issues, of dealing with the demons I carry.
“You can house train me. I’ve never lived with a woman before.” I give her more incentive. I know she won’t deny me, but I want her to understand how big this is for me.
“Oh, yay me.” She rolls her eyes. I pinch her ass, and then hold her tighter when she tries to squirm out of my arms.
“Don’t act cool. You want this,” I challenge. Yeah, in the beginning she was apprehensive. After the wedding, we talked and decided to take things slowly, but slow went out the window the moment we came home.
“I do, Jesse. I’ve never hid that from you. I just want you to be ready.”
“I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t ready, Bell.”
“This is true.” She pulls back and watches me closely. I move my hand to her nape and drag her to my mouth. She doesn’t fight me, opening when my tongue seeks its entry. I kiss her for a moment, letting her taste wash over me before pulling my tongue back.
“Don’t make me beg, woman,” I whisper into her mouth. She smiles against me and I know in that second what her answer is.
“House train you?” she asks, lifting her brow.
“Jesse!” Beau knocks on the door halting me from answering.
“What?” I shake my head at the interruption. “We wouldn’t have this,” I whisper to Bell and wait for his reply.
“Your brother is here.”
“Tell him to fuck off!” I shout back, not in the mood to leave the bed. Things with Jackson have been a lot better, both of us finally finding a happy ground to respect each other on. The last few weeks we’ve barely seen each other with his workload, but he’s been checking in when he can.
“He knew you would say that, so he said to tell you to fuck off right back and that you will want to hear what he has to say.”
Rolling my eyes at Beau and my pain-in-the-ass brother’s words, I look back to Bell.
“Move in with me,” I ask her again, needing an answer with words.
“You should go to your brother,” she replies, her lips dancing with her amusement at my torment.
“Not till you say yes.”
“Ugggh, you’re such a pest, Jesse.” She shakes her head, but the dimple in her cheek deepens as she fights her smile.
“But you love me.” I roll and pin her under me. She fights my hands, but I manage to pin them in my grasp.
“I do.” She gives up her struggle.
“Do you feel safe with me?” I ask, needing to know.
“I do.” She blinks and my heart squeezes knowing how far we’ve come. Yeah, I still have dreams, but they’re much more controlled and Bell knows how to handle them.
“So say you’ll move in with me, I’ll go see my annoying brother, then I can come back and fuck you.” I pepper kisses along her jaw. Her head rolls to the side and her eyes flutter closed with each touch. A soft moan leaves her lips, but it’s not the answer I’m looking for.
“Say it,” I growl before nipping harder at her neck.
“Yes, okay, you big bossy boots.”
Her words set my heart on fire, so I pull back, and watch her for a minute. “Yeah?” I wait for her answer again. Once isn’t enough.
