Drawn Together
Page 39
“How do you think Carrie is going to react?”
“If she isn’t happy for me, I raised her wrong.”
“True. It’s not like you’ve been bringing all manner of random chick around since you and Charlotte split. Mother, on the other hand . . .”
“Whatever.”
“You know I’ve got your back. You kicked my ass when I messed things up with Daisy. We want you to be happy like we are. And in case you’re wondering, those are her words. I’m more prone to bad words and threats to keep you in line.”
Jonah grinned at his brother. “Hopefully it’ll be all right.”
Raven lay on her belly, dancing a plastic horse around as Alexander made growling sounds with his.
“Dude, horses don’t growl.” Ben grinned at his son.
“Mine do.” Alexander nodded once and went back to growling and prancing.
Raven tried not to laugh.
“Good thing you came over. Brody and Elise will be here in a few minutes with Marti and Rennie.”
Alexander clapped. “Yay! Pizza!”
“I was thinking tacos.”
Alexander got serious for a moment and then nodded. “’Kay.”
“Want some help?”
“You’re not going to try to beg off?”
“You’d only guilt me into staying. I haven’t seen the girls in a few weeks, anyway.”
Erin liked the change in her friend. It had been a very long time coming. But Raven seemed comfortable with Elise at long last. And maybe even herself.
“Ben, you need to take over horse duty.” Raven handed the plastic horse to him and he settled in with Alexander.
They went into the kitchen and washed up. “So?” Erin began to pull ingredients from the fridge.
“Things are good.”
“I didn’t even have to poke at you for ten minutes to get you to tell me. Must be good.”
Raven looked up from where she’d started cleaning the produce. “It is. They are. Whatever.”
“You two have spent a lot of time together lately.”
“We have. We spent pretty much the entire day together on Monday. Went up to Snoqualmie to look at the leaves. Walked a lot. He’s a hand holder. Opens doors. Pulls my chair out. He glowers at people if they don’t move out of my way when we’re on the sidewalk.”
Erin loved that about her men. Loved the way they always made her feel protected. Cherished.
“It’s not that I can’t do it for myself. But he likes to and I let him. He sort of gets that I’m letting him. He’s nice to me. Though, he’s so pushy. Always wants to know about my childhood and stuff.”
Erin stilled a moment and then kept moving. “And?”
“I told him some. He saw the scars. I told him about that. He knows I was in foster care. Not all of it,” Raven added quickly. “I don’t want his pity. I don’t know if I could stand it. If he pitied me, I mean.”
“Sometimes, just saying it out loud lifts the weight.” Erin knew about this personally. Knew what it felt like to hold all that pain inside until she’d finally shared it with Todd and then Ben. Knew that it had brought them all closer to have shared her grief.
Knew too that Jonah Warner would keep pushing Raven to share and that hopefully, if Raven didn’t balk and run off, she might have found a person worthy of her confidences.
Raven lifted a shoulder. “It’s hard to say it out loud sometimes.”
“I know. But it’s not you. You did nothing wrong.”
“Academic.”
Erin knew about guilt over things that weren’t her fault too.
“Sometimes you should listen to your head as well as your gut.”
“I’m trying. He wants to stay over. God.”
Erin snorted as she began to shred cheese. “I imagine he’s not one to take no for an answer.”
“No.”
“Why don’t you just tell him?”
“Tell him what? I don’t need therapy, Erin, so don’t start on me with your freaking psychological mumbo jumbo about why I like to sleep alone.”
“Alexander has slept over.”
Raven smiled, softening. For her baby. Love swamped Erin just then. Raven would take a bullet for Alexander. She loved that boy and he loved his auntie right back.
“He’s my best guy. Clearly the rules can be broken for him.”
“I’m just saying, rules were meant to be broken. Especially when they exist to bandage some long-ago trauma that may need a little sunlight and fresh air.”
Raven grunted and went back to work.
Brody came over before Erin could do much more nosing around. Marti, Brody and Elise’s toddler, came into the kitchen at a full run, her arms open. When she saw Raven as well as Erin her face lit even more. She squealed with total joy as Raven stepped to her and swung her up into a hug.
“Martine, my love. I think you’re a foot taller now.”
Marti threw chubby arms around Raven’s neck.
Rennie came into the room and it struck Erin that her niece was nearly a teenager. In just a few months she’d be thirteen. But she had her mother’s beauty. Pale hair, big blue eyes. A dancer’s long, lean body.
“Why hello, Rennie.” Erin hugged her.
“Hey, Aunt Erin.” She grinned. “Thanks for the awesome paints. I’m working on something now. You know, to thank you.”
Elise came in, smiling at the sight of her daughters with Raven and Erin.
“If she isn’t happy for me, I raised her wrong.”
“True. It’s not like you’ve been bringing all manner of random chick around since you and Charlotte split. Mother, on the other hand . . .”
“Whatever.”
“You know I’ve got your back. You kicked my ass when I messed things up with Daisy. We want you to be happy like we are. And in case you’re wondering, those are her words. I’m more prone to bad words and threats to keep you in line.”
Jonah grinned at his brother. “Hopefully it’ll be all right.”
Raven lay on her belly, dancing a plastic horse around as Alexander made growling sounds with his.
“Dude, horses don’t growl.” Ben grinned at his son.
“Mine do.” Alexander nodded once and went back to growling and prancing.
Raven tried not to laugh.
“Good thing you came over. Brody and Elise will be here in a few minutes with Marti and Rennie.”
Alexander clapped. “Yay! Pizza!”
“I was thinking tacos.”
Alexander got serious for a moment and then nodded. “’Kay.”
“Want some help?”
“You’re not going to try to beg off?”
“You’d only guilt me into staying. I haven’t seen the girls in a few weeks, anyway.”
Erin liked the change in her friend. It had been a very long time coming. But Raven seemed comfortable with Elise at long last. And maybe even herself.
“Ben, you need to take over horse duty.” Raven handed the plastic horse to him and he settled in with Alexander.
They went into the kitchen and washed up. “So?” Erin began to pull ingredients from the fridge.
“Things are good.”
“I didn’t even have to poke at you for ten minutes to get you to tell me. Must be good.”
Raven looked up from where she’d started cleaning the produce. “It is. They are. Whatever.”
“You two have spent a lot of time together lately.”
“We have. We spent pretty much the entire day together on Monday. Went up to Snoqualmie to look at the leaves. Walked a lot. He’s a hand holder. Opens doors. Pulls my chair out. He glowers at people if they don’t move out of my way when we’re on the sidewalk.”
Erin loved that about her men. Loved the way they always made her feel protected. Cherished.
“It’s not that I can’t do it for myself. But he likes to and I let him. He sort of gets that I’m letting him. He’s nice to me. Though, he’s so pushy. Always wants to know about my childhood and stuff.”
Erin stilled a moment and then kept moving. “And?”
“I told him some. He saw the scars. I told him about that. He knows I was in foster care. Not all of it,” Raven added quickly. “I don’t want his pity. I don’t know if I could stand it. If he pitied me, I mean.”
“Sometimes, just saying it out loud lifts the weight.” Erin knew about this personally. Knew what it felt like to hold all that pain inside until she’d finally shared it with Todd and then Ben. Knew that it had brought them all closer to have shared her grief.
Knew too that Jonah Warner would keep pushing Raven to share and that hopefully, if Raven didn’t balk and run off, she might have found a person worthy of her confidences.
Raven lifted a shoulder. “It’s hard to say it out loud sometimes.”
“I know. But it’s not you. You did nothing wrong.”
“Academic.”
Erin knew about guilt over things that weren’t her fault too.
“Sometimes you should listen to your head as well as your gut.”
“I’m trying. He wants to stay over. God.”
Erin snorted as she began to shred cheese. “I imagine he’s not one to take no for an answer.”
“No.”
“Why don’t you just tell him?”
“Tell him what? I don’t need therapy, Erin, so don’t start on me with your freaking psychological mumbo jumbo about why I like to sleep alone.”
“Alexander has slept over.”
Raven smiled, softening. For her baby. Love swamped Erin just then. Raven would take a bullet for Alexander. She loved that boy and he loved his auntie right back.
“He’s my best guy. Clearly the rules can be broken for him.”
“I’m just saying, rules were meant to be broken. Especially when they exist to bandage some long-ago trauma that may need a little sunlight and fresh air.”
Raven grunted and went back to work.
Brody came over before Erin could do much more nosing around. Marti, Brody and Elise’s toddler, came into the kitchen at a full run, her arms open. When she saw Raven as well as Erin her face lit even more. She squealed with total joy as Raven stepped to her and swung her up into a hug.
“Martine, my love. I think you’re a foot taller now.”
Marti threw chubby arms around Raven’s neck.
Rennie came into the room and it struck Erin that her niece was nearly a teenager. In just a few months she’d be thirteen. But she had her mother’s beauty. Pale hair, big blue eyes. A dancer’s long, lean body.
“Why hello, Rennie.” Erin hugged her.
“Hey, Aunt Erin.” She grinned. “Thanks for the awesome paints. I’m working on something now. You know, to thank you.”
Elise came in, smiling at the sight of her daughters with Raven and Erin.
