Fearless In Love
Page 37
Burying himself in work was the only remedy. Not on his company or the new product launch, but on tackling the next lead that could help locate Ari’s brother. Picking up his cell, he called his PI again and put Rafe to work on the next of kin for the slain soldiers on Gideon’s team.
Ari had told him more today about the friends she made in foster care, her band of sisters, just like the Mavericks were his brothers. Being a foster kid wasn’t war, but bad things happened. It didn’t have to be physical abuse—the verbal kind was just as bad. His father had proved that time and again. And Matt saw how Evan’s wife, Whitney, could slice his friend to the bone with a few well-aimed words. At least, that seemed to be her goal, whether her aim hit the mark with Evan or not. But where Matt couldn’t find a way to help his friend with his bad marriage, at least he could help Ari.
She’d not only dealt with losing her family and ending up in the foster system, but she’d survived with a joy for life he could never have imagined from someone in her circumstances. Finding her brother would make her life complete.
If he failed her…
Damn it, he wouldn’t let himself think that way.
When his phone rang a moment later, he picked up, saying, “Hey, Will, I was just about to call and check on Noah.”
“Noah’s great. He and Harper and Jeremy are playing Chutes and Ladders right now. She’s as crazy about your kid as the rest of us. And Jeremy never wants him to leave.”
Harper was the mothering type. It wouldn’t be too long after the wedding before he’d be buying baby booties for them. Will’s childhood had been as bad as Matt’s—but he’d come a long way since then. Matt knew his friend and fellow Maverick was going to be a hell of a dad.
“Thanks for taking such good care of him.”
“Always. How are things going down your way?”
Matt had explained the situation when he’d asked Will to take Noah. “Not as much luck as I’d like. Zach Smith was a great guy and filled Ari in on some of the past years, but he hasn’t seen Gideon since they got back.”
“Anything you need from me, just let me know.” Will didn’t know Ari well, but from the tone of his voice, Matt could tell he wished there’d been better news. “How’s Ari taking it?”
“She’s putting up a good front. We’ve got a couple of leads on where he intended to go after he got out, so hopefully those will turn up something positive. Can you keep Noah another night or two?”
“No problem. Mrs. Taylor made a huge batch of chocolate-chip cookies to keep him going. Here’s the little guy now.”
After Will handed Noah the phone, Matt said, “Hey, buddy, I hear you’re having lots of fun with everyone. I miss you so much.”
“I miss you too, Daddy. And Ari. She would have so much fun playing our game.”
“I know she would. She’s taking a bath, otherwise she’d be here to say hi too. She misses you—she told me that lots of times today.”
“Can you give her a good-night kiss for me?”
Matt swallowed past a lump in his throat. “Of course I can. She’ll love that.”
“Love you, Daddy! I gotta go, it’s my turn now.”
“A good-night kiss for your nanny, huh?” Will said when he picked up the phone.
Matt laughed as if Will was crazy for insinuating that he’d made anything sexual out of his kid’s sweet request. But even to his ears, that laughter sounded hollow.
Because he wanted nothing more than to give Ari a good-night kiss.
One that lasted all night long.
Chapter Eighteen
“What would you like to eat?” Matt asked over champagne. Their corner of the restaurant was out of the way, the lights low, candlelight flickering.
Ari fluttered the menu in front of her, setting off a breeze of the floral salts she’d bathed in. When he’d knocked on her door, the room had been awash in fragrance. And his mind had been awash in her.
Her lilac jacket made her cheeks bloom, and beneath her white T-shirt, the matching lilac bra was a tinge of color that shouldn’t have gotten his motor going. Yet the evidence of her lingerie revved him up, reminding him of the night he’d undressed her, the craziness of his need. Even now, he could remember how good—how sweet—she’d tasted.
“There are so many great choices, but the chicken Marsala looks good for tonight.”
“Are you ordering that because you really want it? Or because it’s the cheapest thing on the menu?” It was a five-star hotel with a five-star restaurant, white tablecloths, bone china, crystal glasses, and prices to match. “You can have anything you want, Ari.”
The heated look in her eyes sent electricity shooting through him. He wouldn’t pretend he didn’t know what she wanted. The same thing he wanted—and it had nothing to do with dinner. It was all he could do not to throw down his menu and drag her upstairs.
But he had to walk the straight and narrow, because nothing had changed since that steamy kiss in the pantry. She was still the best nanny Noah had ever had. Matt was still her boss. And blurring those lines could screw everything up. She’d had enough darkness in her life. He wouldn’t add to it by saddling her with his past or his failures.
Tamping down his desire with a Herculean effort, he asked, “Is there anything you haven’t tried?” Damn if that question didn’t make it worse when he thought of all the untried pleasures he could bring her.
Ari rescued him by saying, “Rack of lamb.”
He grabbed the conversational straw she offered. “You’ve never had lamb?”
“I had lamb chops once. My third foster family. There were six kids, and we each got a teeny-tiny one.” She demonstrated the size with her thumb and forefinger. “It wasn’t enough to decide if I liked them.”
“Then rack of lamb it is.” He wanted to give her all the things she’d never had enough of.
As soon as they’d ordered, he said, “I know how hard it was not getting the news you needed from Zach. I’m really sorry about that.”
“Why do you keep apologizing?” The waiter chose that moment to bring their salads. “Let me rephrase,” she said once the man walked away. “Please stop apologizing. I learned more about my brother today than I’ve heard in sixteen years. Alias Smith and Jones.” She smiled. “And a prankster. I loved learning that about him.” She twirled her fork in her fingers, clearly lost in her thoughts. “Gideon was always looking out for everyone. When I was a kid and things were bad, he always tried to make me smile. He must have done the same thing over there. That’s what you did for me today,” she said, a soft shimmer in her eyes. “You gave me pieces of my brother I wouldn’t have had otherwise. I don’t know how to thank you for that.”
Ari had told him more today about the friends she made in foster care, her band of sisters, just like the Mavericks were his brothers. Being a foster kid wasn’t war, but bad things happened. It didn’t have to be physical abuse—the verbal kind was just as bad. His father had proved that time and again. And Matt saw how Evan’s wife, Whitney, could slice his friend to the bone with a few well-aimed words. At least, that seemed to be her goal, whether her aim hit the mark with Evan or not. But where Matt couldn’t find a way to help his friend with his bad marriage, at least he could help Ari.
She’d not only dealt with losing her family and ending up in the foster system, but she’d survived with a joy for life he could never have imagined from someone in her circumstances. Finding her brother would make her life complete.
If he failed her…
Damn it, he wouldn’t let himself think that way.
When his phone rang a moment later, he picked up, saying, “Hey, Will, I was just about to call and check on Noah.”
“Noah’s great. He and Harper and Jeremy are playing Chutes and Ladders right now. She’s as crazy about your kid as the rest of us. And Jeremy never wants him to leave.”
Harper was the mothering type. It wouldn’t be too long after the wedding before he’d be buying baby booties for them. Will’s childhood had been as bad as Matt’s—but he’d come a long way since then. Matt knew his friend and fellow Maverick was going to be a hell of a dad.
“Thanks for taking such good care of him.”
“Always. How are things going down your way?”
Matt had explained the situation when he’d asked Will to take Noah. “Not as much luck as I’d like. Zach Smith was a great guy and filled Ari in on some of the past years, but he hasn’t seen Gideon since they got back.”
“Anything you need from me, just let me know.” Will didn’t know Ari well, but from the tone of his voice, Matt could tell he wished there’d been better news. “How’s Ari taking it?”
“She’s putting up a good front. We’ve got a couple of leads on where he intended to go after he got out, so hopefully those will turn up something positive. Can you keep Noah another night or two?”
“No problem. Mrs. Taylor made a huge batch of chocolate-chip cookies to keep him going. Here’s the little guy now.”
After Will handed Noah the phone, Matt said, “Hey, buddy, I hear you’re having lots of fun with everyone. I miss you so much.”
“I miss you too, Daddy. And Ari. She would have so much fun playing our game.”
“I know she would. She’s taking a bath, otherwise she’d be here to say hi too. She misses you—she told me that lots of times today.”
“Can you give her a good-night kiss for me?”
Matt swallowed past a lump in his throat. “Of course I can. She’ll love that.”
“Love you, Daddy! I gotta go, it’s my turn now.”
“A good-night kiss for your nanny, huh?” Will said when he picked up the phone.
Matt laughed as if Will was crazy for insinuating that he’d made anything sexual out of his kid’s sweet request. But even to his ears, that laughter sounded hollow.
Because he wanted nothing more than to give Ari a good-night kiss.
One that lasted all night long.
Chapter Eighteen
“What would you like to eat?” Matt asked over champagne. Their corner of the restaurant was out of the way, the lights low, candlelight flickering.
Ari fluttered the menu in front of her, setting off a breeze of the floral salts she’d bathed in. When he’d knocked on her door, the room had been awash in fragrance. And his mind had been awash in her.
Her lilac jacket made her cheeks bloom, and beneath her white T-shirt, the matching lilac bra was a tinge of color that shouldn’t have gotten his motor going. Yet the evidence of her lingerie revved him up, reminding him of the night he’d undressed her, the craziness of his need. Even now, he could remember how good—how sweet—she’d tasted.
“There are so many great choices, but the chicken Marsala looks good for tonight.”
“Are you ordering that because you really want it? Or because it’s the cheapest thing on the menu?” It was a five-star hotel with a five-star restaurant, white tablecloths, bone china, crystal glasses, and prices to match. “You can have anything you want, Ari.”
The heated look in her eyes sent electricity shooting through him. He wouldn’t pretend he didn’t know what she wanted. The same thing he wanted—and it had nothing to do with dinner. It was all he could do not to throw down his menu and drag her upstairs.
But he had to walk the straight and narrow, because nothing had changed since that steamy kiss in the pantry. She was still the best nanny Noah had ever had. Matt was still her boss. And blurring those lines could screw everything up. She’d had enough darkness in her life. He wouldn’t add to it by saddling her with his past or his failures.
Tamping down his desire with a Herculean effort, he asked, “Is there anything you haven’t tried?” Damn if that question didn’t make it worse when he thought of all the untried pleasures he could bring her.
Ari rescued him by saying, “Rack of lamb.”
He grabbed the conversational straw she offered. “You’ve never had lamb?”
“I had lamb chops once. My third foster family. There were six kids, and we each got a teeny-tiny one.” She demonstrated the size with her thumb and forefinger. “It wasn’t enough to decide if I liked them.”
“Then rack of lamb it is.” He wanted to give her all the things she’d never had enough of.
As soon as they’d ordered, he said, “I know how hard it was not getting the news you needed from Zach. I’m really sorry about that.”
“Why do you keep apologizing?” The waiter chose that moment to bring their salads. “Let me rephrase,” she said once the man walked away. “Please stop apologizing. I learned more about my brother today than I’ve heard in sixteen years. Alias Smith and Jones.” She smiled. “And a prankster. I loved learning that about him.” She twirled her fork in her fingers, clearly lost in her thoughts. “Gideon was always looking out for everyone. When I was a kid and things were bad, he always tried to make me smile. He must have done the same thing over there. That’s what you did for me today,” she said, a soft shimmer in her eyes. “You gave me pieces of my brother I wouldn’t have had otherwise. I don’t know how to thank you for that.”
