Finding Perfect
Page 13
“No,” she said quickly. “I didn’t. I was so scared, I couldn’t believe it was really happening. There was no way the guy I was seeing would marry me, assuming I’d wanted that, which I didn’t. I kept wishing the baby would go away. One morning I woke up and I was bleeding. I got my period.”
She felt the wave of guilt, the shame that washed through her. “I wished my unborn child would die and it did.”
The doctor rose and pulled Pia to her feet, then held her hands tightly.
“No,” she said in a firm voice. “You don’t have that much power, Pia. None of us do. A significant percentage of pregnancies end spontaneously. It is impossible to predict exactly when it will happen or even know why. Something went wrong inside the embryo. That is why you lost the baby. Not because you wished it so.”
Tears filled Pia’s eyes. “I prayed so hard.”
“God didn’t answer your prayer, child. Have you felt bad all this time?”
She nodded, then swallowed. “I don’t deserve to have Crystal’s babies. I’m a bad person.”
“A bad person wouldn’t care. You are young and healthy and you will be an amazing mother. Come on. We’ll do the exam. We’ll rule out any specific physical problems. Then you can decide. As for the child you lost, it’s time to let him or her go.”
Pia knew in her head that the other woman was right, but in her heart and her gut, the guilt lived on.
AN HOUR LATER, PIA DRESSED. She’d been poked, prodded and gone through her first ultrasound.
“Everything is fine,” Dr. Galloway told her when Pia returned to her office. “You are ready. Based on when you last had your period, you’re within five or six days of peak thickness in your uterine lining. So within the week if you want to go ahead this month.”
“That fast,” Pia said, hanging on to the back of the chair.
“You can wait for as long as you want.”
Medically, yes, but if she waited, she might chicken out.
“How is your insurance?” Dr. Galloway asked. “You might want to check out how much it will cover.”
“I’m with the city plan.” The pregnancy itself would be covered. “Crystal left money to cover the implantation.” There was also some money in trust for each of the children and a small annuity to help Pia with monthly expenses.
“Then the choice is yours.” Dr. Galloway studied her. “Let the past go, child. It’s time to think about the future. Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here to help.”
“Should I do anything special as far as food or vitamins?”
The doctor shook her head. “We’ve done a blood draw. I’ll have the results in a few days. You’ll go on prenatal vitamins then, along with any additional supplements you might need. For now, relax.” The older woman smiled. “No, I take that back. Go find a good-looking man and have sex.”
Pia felt herself flush. “Is that medical advice?”
Dr. Galloway laughed. “Yes. You’re going to be pregnant with triplets, Pia. Your body won’t be your own for much longer. Enjoy it while you can. Is there anyone special in your life?”
She immediately thought of Raoul—her hunky pregnancy buddy. “Not really. I’m not dating.”
“My advice stands. Just make sure you take precautions. Then when you’re ready, we’ll take the next steps.” She rose and walked around her desk. “You’re doing an extraordinary thing, Pia. I’m so proud of you.”
Pia thanked her and left. Information swirled around in her head. She was pleased that the implantation could happen relatively easily, and she appreciated Dr. Galloway’s attempts to reassure her about what had happened in the past. Pia knew logically that she wasn’t to blame for the loss of the baby she’d carried before, but she couldn’t help feeling that being terrified rather than happy had been wrong. And that she would be punished later.
Which meant what? Did she give in to the fear and not have Crystal’s children? That didn’t seem right, either. If she went forward with this, she was going to have to take a leap of faith. On her part, she would do everything right. Take the best care of herself, live perfectly. It would be up to the babies to take care of the rest. A reasonable plan, she told herself. A rational response.
But she couldn’t help but wonder if Crystal would have left her the embryos if she’d known the truth.
PIA HAD BARELY BEEN BACK in her office five minutes when Marsha called.
“They’re here,” the mayor said, sounding desperate. “I knew they were coming, but still.”
“Who’s here?”
“Reporters. They’re everywhere. I need you to come to City Hall and dazzle them.”
“Is this where I tell you I don’t feel especially dazzling?”
“No, it isn’t. We’re desperate. Charity is going to take questions, as well. I need young, confident and sexy. Anything that doesn’t scream pitiful spinster.”
Despite everything that had happened that morning, Pia burst out laughing. “I don’t think we use the ‘S’ word in this century, Marsha.”
“They’re going to use it. Count on it. You’ll come?”
“I’ll be there. Give me fifteen minutes.”
“Make it twelve.”
PIA MADE IT TO CITY HALL in ten minutes, only to find that the mayor wasn’t kidding. There were several news vans parked along the street, with reporters setting up for outdoor shots. It was a perfect fall day—crisp without being too cold, blue sky, the changing leaves adding bursts of red and yellow.
She could see Charity talking to two reporters at once, and a crowd of residents starting to gather. Sucking in a deep breath and reminding herself to speak in coherent sound bites, she stepped toward the cluster of reporters.
“Hello,” she said as she approached. “I’m Pia O’Brian. I work for the city. Mayor Tilson asked me to come by and see if you have any questions.”
Immediately three cameras focused on her. Bright, blinding lights clicked on. Pia did her best not to blink like a mole in the sun.
“What’s your name?” one guy asked. “Can you spell it?”
She didn’t think Pia was a tough one, but she did as he requested.
“What’s with the man shortage?” a young male reporter asked. “How are you driving them away?”
“Is it a sex thing?” another man asked. “The women in town not putting out?”
The assumption being they must be doing something wrong, Pia thought, but she did her best not to let her irritation show.
“Demographically, we’re not as balanced as other communities,” she said calmly. “There are fewer males born per one hundred births than in other places. As the father determines the gender of the child, you’ll have to speak to the men in town to get your question answered.”
The youngest of the three reporters around her blinked, as if he couldn’t remember what he’d asked. All the better for her, she thought.
“Fool’s Gold is a family community,” she continued. “We have an excellent school system, a low crime rate and are a popular tourist destination. Businesses thrive here. We’ve recently signed a contract that brings a second hospital to the area. This one will include a trauma center, something this part of the state needs.”
“Are the women in town excited about the man invasion?” the second reporter asked. “Maybe some of you will get lucky.”
“Oh, joy,” Pia murmured, knowing slapping someone when on camera was never a good idea. “Tourists are always welcome.”
“We’ve heard there are busloads of men coming this way. From all over the country.”
That couldn’t be good. Busloads? What were they supposed to do with them? The kind of men who could drop everything, hop on a bus and travel to a place they’d never seen with the hopes of finding women didn’t sound especially stable. Or community oriented. If this was true, it was a nightmare in the making.
“Lucky us,” she said. “Fool’s Gold is always ready to make visitors feel at home. Families especially.”
“But you’re short on men,” the older of the three said. “So you’ll be personally interested in the guys coming. You can’t get a date, right?”
Pia raised her eyebrows, fighting a sudden flash of temper. “Do I look like I can’t get a date? Is that what you’re implying? That we should be grateful for anyone who comes here and gives us the slightest hint of affection? Do you really think we’re desperate and—”
“There you are,” a smooth male voice said, as a hand slid against the small of her back.
She turned and saw Raoul had joined her.
He gave her a warning glance, which was totally unnecessary. Obviously it was dumb to try to best a reporter while on camera. They had the last word in the editing room. But the assumption that she or any of the women in town were dying for a busload of guys from who knows where to show up was beyond insulting. Sure, many of the women in town wanted to meet someone special and get married, but that was a far cry from being desperate for any man who happened to glance their way.
Raoul extended his right hand to the reporters. “Raoul Moreno. Nice to meet you.”
Pia had the satisfaction of watching two of the three guys’ mouths drop open.
“The football player?” the youngest guy asked. “You played for Dallas. Jesus, you live here?”
“Fool’s Gold is a great town. Family friendly, supportive of businesses. I’ve opened a camp for kids up in the mountains. There’s a new hospital being built and a cycling school run by Josh Golden.”
The oldest reporter frowned. “That’s right. Josh Golden does live here. Hey, I thought there was supposed to be a man shortage.”
Pia felt smug but was determined not to let it show. “We might have some demographic challenges, but we’re still a thriving, happy community. If single men want to be a part of that, great. If they’re thinking they’ve just entered the land of desperate women, they’re sadly mistaken.”
As she spoke, she was aware of Raoul’s hand still pressing against her back. His touch was sure and warm and very, very nice. She found herself wanting to lean in, maybe rest her head against his chest, but that wouldn’t be her smartest move. They weren’t involved. Although there was a teeny-tiny chance she was thinking about asking him for sex.
How far did the pregnancy-buddy offer extend?
“There’s a lot of regional industry that might interest you,” Raoul told them. “We have a local contractor who builds wind turbines. He and his staff are designing some cutting-edge blades using special materials.”
The reporters exchanged glances, as if wind turbines didn’t exactly get their hearts beating faster. But Pia saw what Raoul was doing. Focusing on all the businesses owned by men, trying to get the reporters confused enough that they wouldn’t have a story.
“If you’re looking for local color,” Pia said in her most helpful voice, “there’s Morgan’s Books. He’s been around for years. When I was little, he always made sure the next Nancy Drew book was in stock for me.”
Raoul pulled a business card out of his shirt pocket. “If any of you want to contact me about an interview, I’m available.”
“Great,” the youngest reporter said. “I’ll call you. We can do a feature. Life after football, that sort of thing.”
“Sure.”
The three men drifted away. Pia watched anxiously, then had to hold in a cheer as the bright lights were extinguished and the cameras turned off.
She spun toward Raoul and grinned. “You did it. You saved the town.”
He guided her away from the crowd. “Don’t get too excited. They’ve been fooled, but it won’t last long. This problem isn’t going away.”
She didn’t want to think about that. “How’d you know to come here?”
“The mayor called and asked me to help. She’s worried about the kind of men who will show up based on a news story.”
Pia grinned. “She begged, didn’t she?”
He shrugged. “It was uncomfortable. Besides, I’m not looking for bad press, either. This is my home, too.” He glanced at the milling reporters. “We’ve bought ourselves some time. But if there really are busloads of men heading in this direction, the reporters will be back.”
Not exactly a happy thought. “I guess we’d all better figure out what we’re going to say when they return. Not to mention the logistics of herds of single men. What are we going to do with them? Do you think they’re here to settle down or just hoping to get lucky?”
His gaze met hers. “That was rhetorical, right? You weren’t actually looking for an answer.”
She laughed. “You’ve saved us for the moment and that’s enough. But if you get any brilliant ideas…”
“You’ll be the first to know.”
They stared at each other. He really was good-looking, she thought. Talk about an excellent gene pool. And those hands. They seemed…large.
Dr. Galloway’s teasing words filled her brain. On a practical level, Pia knew that once she had Crystal’s babies, her dating days were long over. Not that she’d been going out all that much before, but still. There had always been the promise of a great guy. Instead she would be the single mother of triplets.
“What?” Raoul asked. “You’re thinking something.”
She felt the wave of guilt, the shame that washed through her. “I wished my unborn child would die and it did.”
The doctor rose and pulled Pia to her feet, then held her hands tightly.
“No,” she said in a firm voice. “You don’t have that much power, Pia. None of us do. A significant percentage of pregnancies end spontaneously. It is impossible to predict exactly when it will happen or even know why. Something went wrong inside the embryo. That is why you lost the baby. Not because you wished it so.”
Tears filled Pia’s eyes. “I prayed so hard.”
“God didn’t answer your prayer, child. Have you felt bad all this time?”
She nodded, then swallowed. “I don’t deserve to have Crystal’s babies. I’m a bad person.”
“A bad person wouldn’t care. You are young and healthy and you will be an amazing mother. Come on. We’ll do the exam. We’ll rule out any specific physical problems. Then you can decide. As for the child you lost, it’s time to let him or her go.”
Pia knew in her head that the other woman was right, but in her heart and her gut, the guilt lived on.
AN HOUR LATER, PIA DRESSED. She’d been poked, prodded and gone through her first ultrasound.
“Everything is fine,” Dr. Galloway told her when Pia returned to her office. “You are ready. Based on when you last had your period, you’re within five or six days of peak thickness in your uterine lining. So within the week if you want to go ahead this month.”
“That fast,” Pia said, hanging on to the back of the chair.
“You can wait for as long as you want.”
Medically, yes, but if she waited, she might chicken out.
“How is your insurance?” Dr. Galloway asked. “You might want to check out how much it will cover.”
“I’m with the city plan.” The pregnancy itself would be covered. “Crystal left money to cover the implantation.” There was also some money in trust for each of the children and a small annuity to help Pia with monthly expenses.
“Then the choice is yours.” Dr. Galloway studied her. “Let the past go, child. It’s time to think about the future. Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here to help.”
“Should I do anything special as far as food or vitamins?”
The doctor shook her head. “We’ve done a blood draw. I’ll have the results in a few days. You’ll go on prenatal vitamins then, along with any additional supplements you might need. For now, relax.” The older woman smiled. “No, I take that back. Go find a good-looking man and have sex.”
Pia felt herself flush. “Is that medical advice?”
Dr. Galloway laughed. “Yes. You’re going to be pregnant with triplets, Pia. Your body won’t be your own for much longer. Enjoy it while you can. Is there anyone special in your life?”
She immediately thought of Raoul—her hunky pregnancy buddy. “Not really. I’m not dating.”
“My advice stands. Just make sure you take precautions. Then when you’re ready, we’ll take the next steps.” She rose and walked around her desk. “You’re doing an extraordinary thing, Pia. I’m so proud of you.”
Pia thanked her and left. Information swirled around in her head. She was pleased that the implantation could happen relatively easily, and she appreciated Dr. Galloway’s attempts to reassure her about what had happened in the past. Pia knew logically that she wasn’t to blame for the loss of the baby she’d carried before, but she couldn’t help feeling that being terrified rather than happy had been wrong. And that she would be punished later.
Which meant what? Did she give in to the fear and not have Crystal’s children? That didn’t seem right, either. If she went forward with this, she was going to have to take a leap of faith. On her part, she would do everything right. Take the best care of herself, live perfectly. It would be up to the babies to take care of the rest. A reasonable plan, she told herself. A rational response.
But she couldn’t help but wonder if Crystal would have left her the embryos if she’d known the truth.
PIA HAD BARELY BEEN BACK in her office five minutes when Marsha called.
“They’re here,” the mayor said, sounding desperate. “I knew they were coming, but still.”
“Who’s here?”
“Reporters. They’re everywhere. I need you to come to City Hall and dazzle them.”
“Is this where I tell you I don’t feel especially dazzling?”
“No, it isn’t. We’re desperate. Charity is going to take questions, as well. I need young, confident and sexy. Anything that doesn’t scream pitiful spinster.”
Despite everything that had happened that morning, Pia burst out laughing. “I don’t think we use the ‘S’ word in this century, Marsha.”
“They’re going to use it. Count on it. You’ll come?”
“I’ll be there. Give me fifteen minutes.”
“Make it twelve.”
PIA MADE IT TO CITY HALL in ten minutes, only to find that the mayor wasn’t kidding. There were several news vans parked along the street, with reporters setting up for outdoor shots. It was a perfect fall day—crisp without being too cold, blue sky, the changing leaves adding bursts of red and yellow.
She could see Charity talking to two reporters at once, and a crowd of residents starting to gather. Sucking in a deep breath and reminding herself to speak in coherent sound bites, she stepped toward the cluster of reporters.
“Hello,” she said as she approached. “I’m Pia O’Brian. I work for the city. Mayor Tilson asked me to come by and see if you have any questions.”
Immediately three cameras focused on her. Bright, blinding lights clicked on. Pia did her best not to blink like a mole in the sun.
“What’s your name?” one guy asked. “Can you spell it?”
She didn’t think Pia was a tough one, but she did as he requested.
“What’s with the man shortage?” a young male reporter asked. “How are you driving them away?”
“Is it a sex thing?” another man asked. “The women in town not putting out?”
The assumption being they must be doing something wrong, Pia thought, but she did her best not to let her irritation show.
“Demographically, we’re not as balanced as other communities,” she said calmly. “There are fewer males born per one hundred births than in other places. As the father determines the gender of the child, you’ll have to speak to the men in town to get your question answered.”
The youngest of the three reporters around her blinked, as if he couldn’t remember what he’d asked. All the better for her, she thought.
“Fool’s Gold is a family community,” she continued. “We have an excellent school system, a low crime rate and are a popular tourist destination. Businesses thrive here. We’ve recently signed a contract that brings a second hospital to the area. This one will include a trauma center, something this part of the state needs.”
“Are the women in town excited about the man invasion?” the second reporter asked. “Maybe some of you will get lucky.”
“Oh, joy,” Pia murmured, knowing slapping someone when on camera was never a good idea. “Tourists are always welcome.”
“We’ve heard there are busloads of men coming this way. From all over the country.”
That couldn’t be good. Busloads? What were they supposed to do with them? The kind of men who could drop everything, hop on a bus and travel to a place they’d never seen with the hopes of finding women didn’t sound especially stable. Or community oriented. If this was true, it was a nightmare in the making.
“Lucky us,” she said. “Fool’s Gold is always ready to make visitors feel at home. Families especially.”
“But you’re short on men,” the older of the three said. “So you’ll be personally interested in the guys coming. You can’t get a date, right?”
Pia raised her eyebrows, fighting a sudden flash of temper. “Do I look like I can’t get a date? Is that what you’re implying? That we should be grateful for anyone who comes here and gives us the slightest hint of affection? Do you really think we’re desperate and—”
“There you are,” a smooth male voice said, as a hand slid against the small of her back.
She turned and saw Raoul had joined her.
He gave her a warning glance, which was totally unnecessary. Obviously it was dumb to try to best a reporter while on camera. They had the last word in the editing room. But the assumption that she or any of the women in town were dying for a busload of guys from who knows where to show up was beyond insulting. Sure, many of the women in town wanted to meet someone special and get married, but that was a far cry from being desperate for any man who happened to glance their way.
Raoul extended his right hand to the reporters. “Raoul Moreno. Nice to meet you.”
Pia had the satisfaction of watching two of the three guys’ mouths drop open.
“The football player?” the youngest guy asked. “You played for Dallas. Jesus, you live here?”
“Fool’s Gold is a great town. Family friendly, supportive of businesses. I’ve opened a camp for kids up in the mountains. There’s a new hospital being built and a cycling school run by Josh Golden.”
The oldest reporter frowned. “That’s right. Josh Golden does live here. Hey, I thought there was supposed to be a man shortage.”
Pia felt smug but was determined not to let it show. “We might have some demographic challenges, but we’re still a thriving, happy community. If single men want to be a part of that, great. If they’re thinking they’ve just entered the land of desperate women, they’re sadly mistaken.”
As she spoke, she was aware of Raoul’s hand still pressing against her back. His touch was sure and warm and very, very nice. She found herself wanting to lean in, maybe rest her head against his chest, but that wouldn’t be her smartest move. They weren’t involved. Although there was a teeny-tiny chance she was thinking about asking him for sex.
How far did the pregnancy-buddy offer extend?
“There’s a lot of regional industry that might interest you,” Raoul told them. “We have a local contractor who builds wind turbines. He and his staff are designing some cutting-edge blades using special materials.”
The reporters exchanged glances, as if wind turbines didn’t exactly get their hearts beating faster. But Pia saw what Raoul was doing. Focusing on all the businesses owned by men, trying to get the reporters confused enough that they wouldn’t have a story.
“If you’re looking for local color,” Pia said in her most helpful voice, “there’s Morgan’s Books. He’s been around for years. When I was little, he always made sure the next Nancy Drew book was in stock for me.”
Raoul pulled a business card out of his shirt pocket. “If any of you want to contact me about an interview, I’m available.”
“Great,” the youngest reporter said. “I’ll call you. We can do a feature. Life after football, that sort of thing.”
“Sure.”
The three men drifted away. Pia watched anxiously, then had to hold in a cheer as the bright lights were extinguished and the cameras turned off.
She spun toward Raoul and grinned. “You did it. You saved the town.”
He guided her away from the crowd. “Don’t get too excited. They’ve been fooled, but it won’t last long. This problem isn’t going away.”
She didn’t want to think about that. “How’d you know to come here?”
“The mayor called and asked me to help. She’s worried about the kind of men who will show up based on a news story.”
Pia grinned. “She begged, didn’t she?”
He shrugged. “It was uncomfortable. Besides, I’m not looking for bad press, either. This is my home, too.” He glanced at the milling reporters. “We’ve bought ourselves some time. But if there really are busloads of men heading in this direction, the reporters will be back.”
Not exactly a happy thought. “I guess we’d all better figure out what we’re going to say when they return. Not to mention the logistics of herds of single men. What are we going to do with them? Do you think they’re here to settle down or just hoping to get lucky?”
His gaze met hers. “That was rhetorical, right? You weren’t actually looking for an answer.”
She laughed. “You’ve saved us for the moment and that’s enough. But if you get any brilliant ideas…”
“You’ll be the first to know.”
They stared at each other. He really was good-looking, she thought. Talk about an excellent gene pool. And those hands. They seemed…large.
Dr. Galloway’s teasing words filled her brain. On a practical level, Pia knew that once she had Crystal’s babies, her dating days were long over. Not that she’d been going out all that much before, but still. There had always been the promise of a great guy. Instead she would be the single mother of triplets.
“What?” Raoul asked. “You’re thinking something.”