Hearts on Air
Page 85
Across the way, I saw the group had started filming again. Isaac climbed to the top of a streetlamp then spun effortlessly to the ground. I smiled, thinking of how far he’d come in such little time. I’d eat my hat if Barry didn’t offer him a full-time part on the show next season. He was young, handsome, a skilled free runner, not to mention he had the most amazing accent. They’d be fools not to take him on. Plus, everyone in the group seemed to love him.
For the rest of the day I barely ate a thing. I couldn’t stop fretting about Paula and whether she was going to come to my gig. On stage at the small club where I was playing, I sat down at my keyboard and clumsily worked my way through each song, messing up so many times I was surprised the manager didn’t kick me out. I couldn’t take my eyes off the entrance all through my set, anxious to see Paula walk through.
But she never showed.
I’d resigned myself to the fact that she wasn’t coming when I introduced my final song of the night. I closed my eyes and played so softly, you’d swear I was trying to imitate a feather hitting the piano keys. Then something tugged at my senses. I felt someone’s attention and opened my eyes to see both Paula and my brother, Samuel, standing just inside the venue. They saw me sing and play piano on countless occasions growing up, but now they looked at me like it was the first time. In awe.
I sang louder. I closed my eyes and played better than ever. I sang like it was the last time I would. I wanted them to see that this was me. This was the sister they’d shunned, the one they’d left out in the cold, called a liar, made feel worthless. Guilty.
I opened my eyes, refusing to close them any longer. Trev was right. I closed my eyes in shame, feeling I was doing something wrong. Now? I refused to feel that way anymore. I refused to hide. I refused to let my family believe I didn’t exist.
Paula and Samuel took seats at a table just a few feet from the stage. When I finished my set, I thanked the audience and stepped down to join them. Both stood when I approached, but I gestured for them to sit back down as I took a seat on the other side of the table.
“You came,” I said, still having a hard time believing they were here, not just Paula, but Samuel, too.
“Yes, we wanted to come. Both of us,” said Paula, her hands fidgeting nervously in her lap.
“I’m so sorry about yesterday,” Samuel added. “It was a surprise for all of us when you showed up.”
I arched a brow. “I bet.”
“You sang wonderfully just now. I remember you writing your own songs growing up, but seeing you play for an audience was so different. You’re very talented,” Paula gushed, and I felt a flush of pleasure at the compliment.
“Thank you,” I replied quietly.
“Reya,” said Samuel, reaching out as though to take my hand. I stiffened and he pulled back. I was happy that they’d come, but that didn’t mean I was ready to hold hands. Clearing his throat, he continued, “We want to . . . no, we need to apologise for what you suffered at the hands of our parents. We’re ashamed that we stood by and stayed silent. We’d like a chance to make amends, but do understand if you won’t accept that. Us.”
I sat very still, hardly able to comprehend what I was hearing. For so many years I’d imagined this moment. It felt entirely too surreal that they were here, and I knew it was no small thing. Their presence meant they were taking a stand. It meant they’d finally listened to their consciences and chosen me over our parents’ iron fist. A surge of validation ran through me, even if it was eight years too late.
“What about Mamá and Papá?” I asked, needing to address the most pertinent issue. “Do they know you’re here?”
Paula and Samuel shared a glance, then Paula answered, “After you ended our phone call today, I confronted them both. I told them I wanted to see you, and needless to say, we fought. Samuel stuck up for me and they eventually said that if we wanted to see you there was nothing they could do to stop us, but they’d never approve of it.”
That sounded like my parents all right. “And I bet they pissed their pants when you walked out the door tonight,” I said wryly.
Paula covered her mouth as she let out a surprised laugh. She was almost seven years older than me, but she still possessed certain childlike traits because my parents kept her so sheltered. Like, the fact that I just referred to them pissing their pants would be pretty scandalous to her.
Samuel’s lips twitched in a smile. “Something like that.”
I smiled at both of them. “Well, in that case, let’s start getting reacquainted, shall we? I want to see Mamá retire to her fainting couch before the week is through.”
We sat at that table for almost two hours talking. I learned that Samuel’s wife just gave birth to their third son and Paula was taking a secretarial course in the city. They offered to drive me back to the apartment, and we parted with a promise to stay in touch. Paula and I were even going to go for manicures when we got back to London.
Life was so bloody weird.
I strolled into the building on a high, smiling to myself all the while. I’d been so angry at Trev for tricking me into seeing my family, but it turned out he was right. If it weren’t for him being selfless and risking our tentative reunion, something he’d obviously yearned for, tonight never would’ve happened. I never would’ve made the first step to reconciling with my siblings.
I thought he was being careless, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. By taking that risk he might’ve lost me, but he did it anyway because he cared about me finding peace more than he did his own happiness.
Everybody was asleep when I got in and I quietly crawled into bed. Part of me was disappointed I couldn’t share my joy with Trev, but I didn’t want to wake him up.
The following day we travelled to Barcelona, the final destination of our three-week stint. Everything was a crazy rush, so I didn’t get a chance to speak with Trev and tell him the good news. The train was at full capacity so Neil and I had to take seats on a separate carriage to everyone else.
Almost as soon as we arrived in the city the group started filming. We made our way to Park Güell, with its crazy, surreal explosion of colour and unusual shapes. I’d seen it in pictures and films, but being there in real life felt like I’d fallen asleep and woken up in a sunny dreamland.
There were so many places for the group to run and show off, and I felt a little sorry for Trev because he couldn’t take full advantage due to his wrist. I watched from the sideline, leaning over the edge of a mosaic wall, as he gestured with his good hand, explaining to Isaac how he wanted him to climb a giant lizard statue and backflip to the ground.
For the rest of the day I barely ate a thing. I couldn’t stop fretting about Paula and whether she was going to come to my gig. On stage at the small club where I was playing, I sat down at my keyboard and clumsily worked my way through each song, messing up so many times I was surprised the manager didn’t kick me out. I couldn’t take my eyes off the entrance all through my set, anxious to see Paula walk through.
But she never showed.
I’d resigned myself to the fact that she wasn’t coming when I introduced my final song of the night. I closed my eyes and played so softly, you’d swear I was trying to imitate a feather hitting the piano keys. Then something tugged at my senses. I felt someone’s attention and opened my eyes to see both Paula and my brother, Samuel, standing just inside the venue. They saw me sing and play piano on countless occasions growing up, but now they looked at me like it was the first time. In awe.
I sang louder. I closed my eyes and played better than ever. I sang like it was the last time I would. I wanted them to see that this was me. This was the sister they’d shunned, the one they’d left out in the cold, called a liar, made feel worthless. Guilty.
I opened my eyes, refusing to close them any longer. Trev was right. I closed my eyes in shame, feeling I was doing something wrong. Now? I refused to feel that way anymore. I refused to hide. I refused to let my family believe I didn’t exist.
Paula and Samuel took seats at a table just a few feet from the stage. When I finished my set, I thanked the audience and stepped down to join them. Both stood when I approached, but I gestured for them to sit back down as I took a seat on the other side of the table.
“You came,” I said, still having a hard time believing they were here, not just Paula, but Samuel, too.
“Yes, we wanted to come. Both of us,” said Paula, her hands fidgeting nervously in her lap.
“I’m so sorry about yesterday,” Samuel added. “It was a surprise for all of us when you showed up.”
I arched a brow. “I bet.”
“You sang wonderfully just now. I remember you writing your own songs growing up, but seeing you play for an audience was so different. You’re very talented,” Paula gushed, and I felt a flush of pleasure at the compliment.
“Thank you,” I replied quietly.
“Reya,” said Samuel, reaching out as though to take my hand. I stiffened and he pulled back. I was happy that they’d come, but that didn’t mean I was ready to hold hands. Clearing his throat, he continued, “We want to . . . no, we need to apologise for what you suffered at the hands of our parents. We’re ashamed that we stood by and stayed silent. We’d like a chance to make amends, but do understand if you won’t accept that. Us.”
I sat very still, hardly able to comprehend what I was hearing. For so many years I’d imagined this moment. It felt entirely too surreal that they were here, and I knew it was no small thing. Their presence meant they were taking a stand. It meant they’d finally listened to their consciences and chosen me over our parents’ iron fist. A surge of validation ran through me, even if it was eight years too late.
“What about Mamá and Papá?” I asked, needing to address the most pertinent issue. “Do they know you’re here?”
Paula and Samuel shared a glance, then Paula answered, “After you ended our phone call today, I confronted them both. I told them I wanted to see you, and needless to say, we fought. Samuel stuck up for me and they eventually said that if we wanted to see you there was nothing they could do to stop us, but they’d never approve of it.”
That sounded like my parents all right. “And I bet they pissed their pants when you walked out the door tonight,” I said wryly.
Paula covered her mouth as she let out a surprised laugh. She was almost seven years older than me, but she still possessed certain childlike traits because my parents kept her so sheltered. Like, the fact that I just referred to them pissing their pants would be pretty scandalous to her.
Samuel’s lips twitched in a smile. “Something like that.”
I smiled at both of them. “Well, in that case, let’s start getting reacquainted, shall we? I want to see Mamá retire to her fainting couch before the week is through.”
We sat at that table for almost two hours talking. I learned that Samuel’s wife just gave birth to their third son and Paula was taking a secretarial course in the city. They offered to drive me back to the apartment, and we parted with a promise to stay in touch. Paula and I were even going to go for manicures when we got back to London.
Life was so bloody weird.
I strolled into the building on a high, smiling to myself all the while. I’d been so angry at Trev for tricking me into seeing my family, but it turned out he was right. If it weren’t for him being selfless and risking our tentative reunion, something he’d obviously yearned for, tonight never would’ve happened. I never would’ve made the first step to reconciling with my siblings.
I thought he was being careless, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. By taking that risk he might’ve lost me, but he did it anyway because he cared about me finding peace more than he did his own happiness.
Everybody was asleep when I got in and I quietly crawled into bed. Part of me was disappointed I couldn’t share my joy with Trev, but I didn’t want to wake him up.
The following day we travelled to Barcelona, the final destination of our three-week stint. Everything was a crazy rush, so I didn’t get a chance to speak with Trev and tell him the good news. The train was at full capacity so Neil and I had to take seats on a separate carriage to everyone else.
Almost as soon as we arrived in the city the group started filming. We made our way to Park Güell, with its crazy, surreal explosion of colour and unusual shapes. I’d seen it in pictures and films, but being there in real life felt like I’d fallen asleep and woken up in a sunny dreamland.
There were so many places for the group to run and show off, and I felt a little sorry for Trev because he couldn’t take full advantage due to his wrist. I watched from the sideline, leaning over the edge of a mosaic wall, as he gestured with his good hand, explaining to Isaac how he wanted him to climb a giant lizard statue and backflip to the ground.
