Hold on Tight
Page 25
Micah’s eyes got bigger. “I have grandparents? I thought you said I didn’t.”
Sighing, I kissed his head. “I didn’t want you to think that your grandparents didn’t love you. I thought they were turning their backs on us since your daddy was gone. So I was protecting you.”
Micah was quiet for several minutes. I let him think about all this and didn’t speak. He fiddled with his thumbs as he studied his hands. Every once in a while he glanced back over his shoulder, out the window to the house across the street. I couldn’t imagine what was going on in his little head. Saving him from any more pain was my first concern.
“Do they have pictures of my daddy?” he asked. I’d only had a couple in my purse when I had been shipped off, and that was all Micah had seen of his father.
I nodded. “They have a lot. You will even see pictures of him when he was your age. You can see just how much you look like him.”
Micah fidgeted and looked out the window toward their house. “Can I go see the pictures and have some cookies?” he asked, turning back to me.
Tabby would probably never be without chocolate chip cookies again. “I am sure they are waiting anxiously for you to come over there. Do you want me to come too? Or would you like me to let you visit alone?”
Sending him over there alone terrified me. I wanted to hold his hand through this, but just like through everything else, Micah was a rock. He handled things with a strength that was unexpected from a five-year-old.
“I want you there. She’s makes really good cookies. You can eat some too.”
I wanted to let out a sigh of relief.
“Okay, then. Let me get dressed and brush my hair, and then we can walk over there. Why don’t you go get dressed too?” He was till wearing his Superman pajamas.
He nodded and hopped up, then ran off. This had been much easier than I’d anticipated. But then, he hadn’t had time for it to sink in yet.
I followed behind him and went to the bathroom. Before I did anything else, I stood there and looked at myself. I had always thought I was pretty. Guys seemed to like me. I wasn’t a raving beauty or anything, but my body wasn’t bad. My legs were long and I had C-cup boobs. My hair was red, but I had made my peace with that a long time ago, as well as the freckles on my nose. But knowing Dewayne had described me as average stung. No . . . it was a serious blow to my self-esteem. Maybe I had aged more than I realized. Maybe being a struggling single mom had put some wear and tear on me. I leaned toward the mirror and checked for wrinkles. I did see my freckles, but no wrinkles yet. I guess my nose was kind of stubby and my arms weren’t that toned. I didn’t have time for the gym. Any sign of a tan had faded.
I guess I was average. He hadn’t called me ugly, at least. I could live with average. Besides, I was Micah’s mom—who cared what a man thought of me? It wasn’t like I was looking to start dating. If that were the case, I might have spent a little more time than usual making myself look less worn out.
When I was finished brushing my teeth and brushing my hair, I wanted to slap myself for letting Dewayne’s opinion affect me. I was better than that. I was tougher than that. Being pretty wasn’t something I worried about normally. I went to my closet, pulled out a pair of shorts, and pulled them on, then grabbed a tank top. I would not think about my clothing choices. I was not going to dress nicer than this for a visit across the street. I intended to do some yard work today and have a picnic in the backyard with my son. No reason to dress up. I’d already spent more time on my face than was necessary for those activities.
I slipped my feet into a pair of flip-flops and refused to care that I hadn’t painted my toenails since taking off the old polish last week. It did not matter. At all.
“You ready, Momma?” Micah asked as he bounced on the balls of his feet, looking out the screen door toward the Falcos’ house. He was anxious to see them again now that he knew they were his family.
“Yes, sir,” I replied, reaching for his hand and opening the door. “Let’s go meet your grandparents.”
“I already met them, Momma. Remember?”
I nodded. “Yes, you did, but this time will be different because now they know how important you are to them.”
Micah seemed to take that in as he started walking toward the street, pulling me with him. Dewayne’s truck was still in the driveway, and although I knew he needed to see Micah and talk to him now that Micah knew he was family, I kind of wish he had left.
As much as I shouldn’t care about the ‘average’ comment, it had hurt my feelings, and it was going to make me feel uncomfortable around him. I hated that. I wished I could just get over it. That teenage crush I had on Dewayne was rearing its ugly head and taunting me with his opinion of me. Men sucked.
DEWAYNE
Momma stood at the door, watching Micah and Sienna walk toward the house. She was wringing her hands, barely able to contain herself. She’d been watching their house ever since we got back home. I was glad Sienna wasn’t going to make her wait. She had talked to Micah right away, it looked like.
Figures the kid would be curious and want to come over. He was like his dad in that way.
“Look at him. He’s so perfect. Looks just like Dustin,” Momma breathed in awe as they walked up the front steps.
“Open the door for them, Momma,” I told her.
Dad stood up from his spot on the sofa and walked over to join her as they greeted their grandson. Dad’s hand settled on Momma’s back, and she reached back to squeeze his hand. This was good for them. Micah was gonna be good for them.
Sighing, I kissed his head. “I didn’t want you to think that your grandparents didn’t love you. I thought they were turning their backs on us since your daddy was gone. So I was protecting you.”
Micah was quiet for several minutes. I let him think about all this and didn’t speak. He fiddled with his thumbs as he studied his hands. Every once in a while he glanced back over his shoulder, out the window to the house across the street. I couldn’t imagine what was going on in his little head. Saving him from any more pain was my first concern.
“Do they have pictures of my daddy?” he asked. I’d only had a couple in my purse when I had been shipped off, and that was all Micah had seen of his father.
I nodded. “They have a lot. You will even see pictures of him when he was your age. You can see just how much you look like him.”
Micah fidgeted and looked out the window toward their house. “Can I go see the pictures and have some cookies?” he asked, turning back to me.
Tabby would probably never be without chocolate chip cookies again. “I am sure they are waiting anxiously for you to come over there. Do you want me to come too? Or would you like me to let you visit alone?”
Sending him over there alone terrified me. I wanted to hold his hand through this, but just like through everything else, Micah was a rock. He handled things with a strength that was unexpected from a five-year-old.
“I want you there. She’s makes really good cookies. You can eat some too.”
I wanted to let out a sigh of relief.
“Okay, then. Let me get dressed and brush my hair, and then we can walk over there. Why don’t you go get dressed too?” He was till wearing his Superman pajamas.
He nodded and hopped up, then ran off. This had been much easier than I’d anticipated. But then, he hadn’t had time for it to sink in yet.
I followed behind him and went to the bathroom. Before I did anything else, I stood there and looked at myself. I had always thought I was pretty. Guys seemed to like me. I wasn’t a raving beauty or anything, but my body wasn’t bad. My legs were long and I had C-cup boobs. My hair was red, but I had made my peace with that a long time ago, as well as the freckles on my nose. But knowing Dewayne had described me as average stung. No . . . it was a serious blow to my self-esteem. Maybe I had aged more than I realized. Maybe being a struggling single mom had put some wear and tear on me. I leaned toward the mirror and checked for wrinkles. I did see my freckles, but no wrinkles yet. I guess my nose was kind of stubby and my arms weren’t that toned. I didn’t have time for the gym. Any sign of a tan had faded.
I guess I was average. He hadn’t called me ugly, at least. I could live with average. Besides, I was Micah’s mom—who cared what a man thought of me? It wasn’t like I was looking to start dating. If that were the case, I might have spent a little more time than usual making myself look less worn out.
When I was finished brushing my teeth and brushing my hair, I wanted to slap myself for letting Dewayne’s opinion affect me. I was better than that. I was tougher than that. Being pretty wasn’t something I worried about normally. I went to my closet, pulled out a pair of shorts, and pulled them on, then grabbed a tank top. I would not think about my clothing choices. I was not going to dress nicer than this for a visit across the street. I intended to do some yard work today and have a picnic in the backyard with my son. No reason to dress up. I’d already spent more time on my face than was necessary for those activities.
I slipped my feet into a pair of flip-flops and refused to care that I hadn’t painted my toenails since taking off the old polish last week. It did not matter. At all.
“You ready, Momma?” Micah asked as he bounced on the balls of his feet, looking out the screen door toward the Falcos’ house. He was anxious to see them again now that he knew they were his family.
“Yes, sir,” I replied, reaching for his hand and opening the door. “Let’s go meet your grandparents.”
“I already met them, Momma. Remember?”
I nodded. “Yes, you did, but this time will be different because now they know how important you are to them.”
Micah seemed to take that in as he started walking toward the street, pulling me with him. Dewayne’s truck was still in the driveway, and although I knew he needed to see Micah and talk to him now that Micah knew he was family, I kind of wish he had left.
As much as I shouldn’t care about the ‘average’ comment, it had hurt my feelings, and it was going to make me feel uncomfortable around him. I hated that. I wished I could just get over it. That teenage crush I had on Dewayne was rearing its ugly head and taunting me with his opinion of me. Men sucked.
DEWAYNE
Momma stood at the door, watching Micah and Sienna walk toward the house. She was wringing her hands, barely able to contain herself. She’d been watching their house ever since we got back home. I was glad Sienna wasn’t going to make her wait. She had talked to Micah right away, it looked like.
Figures the kid would be curious and want to come over. He was like his dad in that way.
“Look at him. He’s so perfect. Looks just like Dustin,” Momma breathed in awe as they walked up the front steps.
“Open the door for them, Momma,” I told her.
Dad stood up from his spot on the sofa and walked over to join her as they greeted their grandson. Dad’s hand settled on Momma’s back, and she reached back to squeeze his hand. This was good for them. Micah was gonna be good for them.
