In the Crease
Page 21
She was shaking her head. “I don’t want that, though. I don’t want a real husband—”
“Not yet, but maybe in the next six months, you will.”
Her lips pressed together as she looked down at her growing belly. Maybe he had come on too strong, but he didn’t think there was any other way to be but straightforward. If she wanted this, then this was how it was going to be. His heart was jackhammering in his chest. Sweat had broken out along his forehead, and everything was tingling. His whole body. Holy fuck, he was doing this.
“I would be a good father to him. I’d love him as if he were my blood.”
Her lips curved down in a pout as she nodded. “Oh, Jensen, I know. I know that with all of my soul.”
He nodded, choking on his own heart. “I’d be a good husband too.”
She met his gaze, her eyes wide and so damn beautiful. “I don’t doubt that, but it isn’t what I want. I don’t want that life. I don’t even think I’m gonna be good at the whole mom thing, but a wife too?”
“You’ll be great,” he said simply, and her eyes widened, full of tears.
“I don’t know.”
He almost didn’t move, but he knew he had to. Standing up, he dug into his pocket for the ring that was his grandmother’s before walking around the desk to her. Going down on one knee, he held the ring up to her as she turned in her seat to look down at him. Her eyes were wide, wild, and full of fear.
The last time he had seen her look like that was when Vaughn dared her to jump off a bridge that was ten feet above the water. She didn’t want to do it, but Wells and Vaughn had, and boy, were they taunting her. Coming up beside her, Jensen had said he’d jump with her. Together, hand in hand, they did it. And just like then, he wanted her to jump with him once more.
“This is my grandmother’s ring, I thought you’d like it.”
She glanced at the ring. He knew it was nothing special, just a vintage gold band. Ophelia thought it was ugly and didn’t want it, so he had bought her a different one, but he was pretty sure this ring was more Wren’s style anyway.
As she glanced up from it, a smile covered her gorgeous face. “It’s so elegant.”
“I agree, and I’d really love for you to have it as a symbol of my promise to stand beside you and be there for you. Maybe even be able to love you.”
“Jensen,” she tried, but then she shook her head. “Really, this is what you want? With me? Someone who could possibly never love you back. You deserve more than that. Find a woman who will love you and adopt a baby or something.”
But he shook his head. “I believe God puts you in situations for a reason. This boy needs a dad. I can be that for him and more. I’ll be his mentor, his best friend, and I will love both of you—till my dying day, if you let me. I can’t be your mentor because I’m pretty sure you’re smarter than me, but Wren, I’ve always been your best friend. You know that.”
“Jenny, Jesus, you’re killing me here,” she cried, her eyes getting lost in his soft gaze.
“I know we can make this work.”
“I don’t know that,” she admitted, her eyes holding his. “And I don’t want to hurt you.”
He could see it in her eyes. She didn’t want that, and neither did he. But he refused to go into this without his terms. Because if he did, he’d get hurt. A hundred percent, he would. Clearing his throat, he shook his head. “You won’t, as long as you try.”
She looked to the ring and then back at him once more. He could hear her heart pounding, or maybe that was his. He wasn’t sure, but his eyes stayed locked with hers as she went from the ring to him. Finally, she asked, “Can I have some time? To think it over?”
His heart dropped into his gut. Was he that awful? He was basically going to give her the world, why wasn’t she taking it? Dropping his hand, he nodded. “I mean, yeah, you gave me time. I think that’s only fair.”
“I’m sorry. I just want to be sure I’m doing the right thing.”
“No, it’s fine.”
“Jenny, I can see it on your face. You’re not happy with me.”
He got up, shrugging as he tucked the ring back into his pocket. “I’d give you the world, Wren. All of it.”
“Why? Why would you do this? For the kid?”
“For you.”
And with that, he turned, walking toward her office door. “You know how to get ahold of me.”
“Yeah,” she said to his retreating back before he opened the door and stepped out.
Catching her gaze once more before he shut the door, he shrugged. “And, Wren, I don’t make a promise I don’t intend to keep.”
“I know.”
He nodded. “And I hope you’ll do the same.”
Her lips started to quiver, and she nodded. “I know, that’s why I’m asking for time to think this over.”
He smiled. “Or to see if the gigolo is still available?”
Her face broke into a grin. “That too.” He nodded, but as he went to shut the door, she called, “Thanks, Jenny.”
He shut the door and then leaned against it.
That hadn’t gone the way he’d assumed it would.
But then, what in his life ever did?
He had come to Nashville on a whim. Traded because he wanted so desperately to be loved and cherished on a team. At first, he didn’t think that would happen on the Assassins, but it had. Not only on the ice, but in the locker room. He had friends, he had brothers, he just fit, but it wasn’t what he’d thought would transpire. He’d thought he’d come here and play backup to one of the greats, Tate Odder, and just get by. People would like him, but he wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Instead, he became a sensation. He established relationships with charities, supported them however he could, and then helped his team win the Cup. And now, he was asking a girl to marry him.
A girl who didn’t love him, apparently.
A girl who didn’t want to be in a relationship.
A girl whom he had known his whole life.
A girl who didn’t know he loved her.
Yeah, he was an idiot. But if it worked, if he got Wren to agree and to try to love him, he would love the hell out of her.
And the baby.
Both of them.
With his whole body and soul.
“Not yet, but maybe in the next six months, you will.”
Her lips pressed together as she looked down at her growing belly. Maybe he had come on too strong, but he didn’t think there was any other way to be but straightforward. If she wanted this, then this was how it was going to be. His heart was jackhammering in his chest. Sweat had broken out along his forehead, and everything was tingling. His whole body. Holy fuck, he was doing this.
“I would be a good father to him. I’d love him as if he were my blood.”
Her lips curved down in a pout as she nodded. “Oh, Jensen, I know. I know that with all of my soul.”
He nodded, choking on his own heart. “I’d be a good husband too.”
She met his gaze, her eyes wide and so damn beautiful. “I don’t doubt that, but it isn’t what I want. I don’t want that life. I don’t even think I’m gonna be good at the whole mom thing, but a wife too?”
“You’ll be great,” he said simply, and her eyes widened, full of tears.
“I don’t know.”
He almost didn’t move, but he knew he had to. Standing up, he dug into his pocket for the ring that was his grandmother’s before walking around the desk to her. Going down on one knee, he held the ring up to her as she turned in her seat to look down at him. Her eyes were wide, wild, and full of fear.
The last time he had seen her look like that was when Vaughn dared her to jump off a bridge that was ten feet above the water. She didn’t want to do it, but Wells and Vaughn had, and boy, were they taunting her. Coming up beside her, Jensen had said he’d jump with her. Together, hand in hand, they did it. And just like then, he wanted her to jump with him once more.
“This is my grandmother’s ring, I thought you’d like it.”
She glanced at the ring. He knew it was nothing special, just a vintage gold band. Ophelia thought it was ugly and didn’t want it, so he had bought her a different one, but he was pretty sure this ring was more Wren’s style anyway.
As she glanced up from it, a smile covered her gorgeous face. “It’s so elegant.”
“I agree, and I’d really love for you to have it as a symbol of my promise to stand beside you and be there for you. Maybe even be able to love you.”
“Jensen,” she tried, but then she shook her head. “Really, this is what you want? With me? Someone who could possibly never love you back. You deserve more than that. Find a woman who will love you and adopt a baby or something.”
But he shook his head. “I believe God puts you in situations for a reason. This boy needs a dad. I can be that for him and more. I’ll be his mentor, his best friend, and I will love both of you—till my dying day, if you let me. I can’t be your mentor because I’m pretty sure you’re smarter than me, but Wren, I’ve always been your best friend. You know that.”
“Jenny, Jesus, you’re killing me here,” she cried, her eyes getting lost in his soft gaze.
“I know we can make this work.”
“I don’t know that,” she admitted, her eyes holding his. “And I don’t want to hurt you.”
He could see it in her eyes. She didn’t want that, and neither did he. But he refused to go into this without his terms. Because if he did, he’d get hurt. A hundred percent, he would. Clearing his throat, he shook his head. “You won’t, as long as you try.”
She looked to the ring and then back at him once more. He could hear her heart pounding, or maybe that was his. He wasn’t sure, but his eyes stayed locked with hers as she went from the ring to him. Finally, she asked, “Can I have some time? To think it over?”
His heart dropped into his gut. Was he that awful? He was basically going to give her the world, why wasn’t she taking it? Dropping his hand, he nodded. “I mean, yeah, you gave me time. I think that’s only fair.”
“I’m sorry. I just want to be sure I’m doing the right thing.”
“No, it’s fine.”
“Jenny, I can see it on your face. You’re not happy with me.”
He got up, shrugging as he tucked the ring back into his pocket. “I’d give you the world, Wren. All of it.”
“Why? Why would you do this? For the kid?”
“For you.”
And with that, he turned, walking toward her office door. “You know how to get ahold of me.”
“Yeah,” she said to his retreating back before he opened the door and stepped out.
Catching her gaze once more before he shut the door, he shrugged. “And, Wren, I don’t make a promise I don’t intend to keep.”
“I know.”
He nodded. “And I hope you’ll do the same.”
Her lips started to quiver, and she nodded. “I know, that’s why I’m asking for time to think this over.”
He smiled. “Or to see if the gigolo is still available?”
Her face broke into a grin. “That too.” He nodded, but as he went to shut the door, she called, “Thanks, Jenny.”
He shut the door and then leaned against it.
That hadn’t gone the way he’d assumed it would.
But then, what in his life ever did?
He had come to Nashville on a whim. Traded because he wanted so desperately to be loved and cherished on a team. At first, he didn’t think that would happen on the Assassins, but it had. Not only on the ice, but in the locker room. He had friends, he had brothers, he just fit, but it wasn’t what he’d thought would transpire. He’d thought he’d come here and play backup to one of the greats, Tate Odder, and just get by. People would like him, but he wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Instead, he became a sensation. He established relationships with charities, supported them however he could, and then helped his team win the Cup. And now, he was asking a girl to marry him.
A girl who didn’t love him, apparently.
A girl who didn’t want to be in a relationship.
A girl whom he had known his whole life.
A girl who didn’t know he loved her.
Yeah, he was an idiot. But if it worked, if he got Wren to agree and to try to love him, he would love the hell out of her.
And the baby.
Both of them.
With his whole body and soul.
