Laid Bare
Page 74
She snuggled into his body. “You don’t need to tell me all this. I know you love me.”
“I know I don’t need to. I want to. I want you to know you come first. Before Todd, before anyone. Before with Caroline, I never felt settled. I was lonely. I’m not lonely anymore. You are more than enough. You’re everything. We’ll work through things as they come up. I love you, Erin.”
She smiled against the skin of his throat. “Good. I love you too. I’m sorry you were lonely, but I know what that is. I’m glad you don’t feel it anymore. And I’m glad you told me all this. I do feel better. So call her and talk a bit. I’m going to start dinner.”
He caught her before she stood fully and brought her back to his lap, finding her mouth and giving her a long, lazy kiss.
She sighed happily when he released her and he liked that very much.
“Tell me about your day. I’m not calling anyone just now.” He stood and went with her into the kitchen and did the tasks she assigned him as he drank a beer and listened to the smoke of her voice.
She told him about the trial and he frowned, but knew good and well that once she’d decided to do something, she would do it, and he’d just have to deal with it. He liked that Todd had insisted on one of them being there with her during the trial though. Smart man.
“How do you feel about it? About going back into a courtroom?”
“Panicked. Nauseated. Freaked. But I need to do it. She’s my friend and she needs me. I feel like everything I’ve experienced, this past year especially, has been for a reason. Todd coming back into my café, meeting you, getting married, this trial. I need to do this because I’m supposed to. I know that sounds all woo-woo and stuff, but there it is. I’m meant to face my fears, I’m meant to overcome them. Each time I beat something back, I get stronger and”—she paused, hanging her head—“and I want to not be scared anymore. I want to be who I was.”
She tried to hold back the tears; he saw her struggle and, in the end, she simply turned to him and let him wrap his arms around her, hugging her tight. That she’d turn to him this way made him want to cry, but also made him feel like they’d reached yet another important place in their relationship. She trusted him with her good stuff as well as her bad.
“You will never be who you were before, Erin. You’ve gone through things people shouldn’t have to experience. But you are claiming your life. Every day since I met you, you’ve been grabbing your life back with both hands. I’m proud of you, and Todd and I will be there every step of the way.”
“Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. It’s my job.”
The keys rattled through all three locks Ben had carefully locked behind him when he’d come home. She didn’t disentangle herself from him immediately and a part of him settled that much more.
She kissed him. “I’m so glad you love me.”
“You always know to say the exact thing I need to hear right when I need to hear it.”
She smiled. “Good.”
“Hey, you two,” Todd called out as he ditched his shoes and other crap near the front door. Erin’s back was rigid under Ben’s palm until all three locks sounded.
Todd came toward them, touching Ben’s arm and kissing Erin while she was still in Ben’s embrace. She made no move to leave and Todd made no attempt to take her.
“Evenin’, honey, you feeling better?” Todd pulled back, and Ben handed him a beer when Erin went back to work slicing up vegetables.
“I finished a song and snuggled with Ben. I’m much better now. You should call Cope and invite him to dinner. He comes around a lot less now that you both live here, and I’m sure he misses that.” Erin put the vegetables aside and began to mince garlic. The scent painted the air, making Ben’s stomach growl.
“Yeah, good idea.” Todd grabbed the phone and in a few sentences, his brother was on the way over for dinner.
Erin would wait until Cope arrived to toss the prawns into the vegetables. She made a quick orzo salad and grabbed a bottle of wine and some sparkling water, slicing up limes to serve with it.
Ben and Todd were discussing some client or other; most of what they were saying was just a sexy male rumble from several feet away.
Her life was normal even as it was unusual. Then again, it had never been usual or typical, so really, what was two men instead of one? She smiled to herself; it was lucky when both men were smoking hot, protective, dominant and loving, but she’d had many exceptional experiences in her life, so this was another she was grateful for.
Cope showed up all noise and clomping boots. She smiled as he kissed her cheek and handed her a box of chocolates from Dilettante. The men cracked open beers and laughed, at ease with one another and she watched while tossing the prawns briefly with the veggies.
“You know, you’re welcome to drop by here too.” Erin slid the prawns and veggies over the orzo and put the platter on the table. She knew how close the three were and the last thing she wanted was to come in between them. She liked Cope and wanted things smooth for the brothers and for Todd too.
“I just didn’t want to get in the way.” Cope actually blushed and Erin laughed.
She put out the bread she’d picked up at the Market on her way home and the cheeses she’d bought for them. “We don’t have sex every waking moment, you know.”
Ben choked. “Erin’s right. You’re welcome here. God only knows what would happen to you if you had to fend for yourself for dinner. You’d waste away.”
“I know I don’t need to. I want to. I want you to know you come first. Before Todd, before anyone. Before with Caroline, I never felt settled. I was lonely. I’m not lonely anymore. You are more than enough. You’re everything. We’ll work through things as they come up. I love you, Erin.”
She smiled against the skin of his throat. “Good. I love you too. I’m sorry you were lonely, but I know what that is. I’m glad you don’t feel it anymore. And I’m glad you told me all this. I do feel better. So call her and talk a bit. I’m going to start dinner.”
He caught her before she stood fully and brought her back to his lap, finding her mouth and giving her a long, lazy kiss.
She sighed happily when he released her and he liked that very much.
“Tell me about your day. I’m not calling anyone just now.” He stood and went with her into the kitchen and did the tasks she assigned him as he drank a beer and listened to the smoke of her voice.
She told him about the trial and he frowned, but knew good and well that once she’d decided to do something, she would do it, and he’d just have to deal with it. He liked that Todd had insisted on one of them being there with her during the trial though. Smart man.
“How do you feel about it? About going back into a courtroom?”
“Panicked. Nauseated. Freaked. But I need to do it. She’s my friend and she needs me. I feel like everything I’ve experienced, this past year especially, has been for a reason. Todd coming back into my café, meeting you, getting married, this trial. I need to do this because I’m supposed to. I know that sounds all woo-woo and stuff, but there it is. I’m meant to face my fears, I’m meant to overcome them. Each time I beat something back, I get stronger and”—she paused, hanging her head—“and I want to not be scared anymore. I want to be who I was.”
She tried to hold back the tears; he saw her struggle and, in the end, she simply turned to him and let him wrap his arms around her, hugging her tight. That she’d turn to him this way made him want to cry, but also made him feel like they’d reached yet another important place in their relationship. She trusted him with her good stuff as well as her bad.
“You will never be who you were before, Erin. You’ve gone through things people shouldn’t have to experience. But you are claiming your life. Every day since I met you, you’ve been grabbing your life back with both hands. I’m proud of you, and Todd and I will be there every step of the way.”
“Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. It’s my job.”
The keys rattled through all three locks Ben had carefully locked behind him when he’d come home. She didn’t disentangle herself from him immediately and a part of him settled that much more.
She kissed him. “I’m so glad you love me.”
“You always know to say the exact thing I need to hear right when I need to hear it.”
She smiled. “Good.”
“Hey, you two,” Todd called out as he ditched his shoes and other crap near the front door. Erin’s back was rigid under Ben’s palm until all three locks sounded.
Todd came toward them, touching Ben’s arm and kissing Erin while she was still in Ben’s embrace. She made no move to leave and Todd made no attempt to take her.
“Evenin’, honey, you feeling better?” Todd pulled back, and Ben handed him a beer when Erin went back to work slicing up vegetables.
“I finished a song and snuggled with Ben. I’m much better now. You should call Cope and invite him to dinner. He comes around a lot less now that you both live here, and I’m sure he misses that.” Erin put the vegetables aside and began to mince garlic. The scent painted the air, making Ben’s stomach growl.
“Yeah, good idea.” Todd grabbed the phone and in a few sentences, his brother was on the way over for dinner.
Erin would wait until Cope arrived to toss the prawns into the vegetables. She made a quick orzo salad and grabbed a bottle of wine and some sparkling water, slicing up limes to serve with it.
Ben and Todd were discussing some client or other; most of what they were saying was just a sexy male rumble from several feet away.
Her life was normal even as it was unusual. Then again, it had never been usual or typical, so really, what was two men instead of one? She smiled to herself; it was lucky when both men were smoking hot, protective, dominant and loving, but she’d had many exceptional experiences in her life, so this was another she was grateful for.
Cope showed up all noise and clomping boots. She smiled as he kissed her cheek and handed her a box of chocolates from Dilettante. The men cracked open beers and laughed, at ease with one another and she watched while tossing the prawns briefly with the veggies.
“You know, you’re welcome to drop by here too.” Erin slid the prawns and veggies over the orzo and put the platter on the table. She knew how close the three were and the last thing she wanted was to come in between them. She liked Cope and wanted things smooth for the brothers and for Todd too.
“I just didn’t want to get in the way.” Cope actually blushed and Erin laughed.
She put out the bread she’d picked up at the Market on her way home and the cheeses she’d bought for them. “We don’t have sex every waking moment, you know.”
Ben choked. “Erin’s right. You’re welcome here. God only knows what would happen to you if you had to fend for yourself for dinner. You’d waste away.”
