Life After Taylah
Page 73
She opens the door, and I struggle to keep my face as calm as I can.
“What were you doing?” I ask, keeping my voice steady.
“I was just on the phone with the doctor.”
Liar. Liar. Fucking Liar.
“Right, well, don’t you have a treatment today? I’m coming with you to this one, like it or not.”
Her face pales. God, how did I not notice this before? All along she’s been dancing around this, going to “appointments” by herself. How could I be so fucking naïve?
“I prefer to go alone, Nate. You know it makes me feel ill. I don’t want you to see me like that.”
“I’m your husband, I’ve seen you give birth. It’s fine.”
“Nate, please, why do we have to argue about this?”
“What is it you’ve got exactly?” I say, glaring at her.
She stares at me, narrowing her eyes. “You know what I’ve got.”
“Refresh me.”
Finally, she clues on. “What’s going on, Nate?”
“I want to see a doctor’s report.”
“Why?” she cries.
“Because you’re a fuckin’ liar, that’s why,” I roar, finally losing my shit.
Her face falls and her face falls. “Nate, please . . .”
“Did you really think I wouldn’t find out?” I hiss, stepping forward. She takes a step back until we’re both in the room.
“You were going to leave me,” she sobs. “You were going to go off with her.”
“How do you even know about her?” I bellow.
“I’m not fucking stupid. I saw the way you looked at her. It wasn’t hard to figure out. Then I saw a message on your phone a few months ago and I knew.”
“So you lied, you made a mockery of sick people so I wouldn’t leave? What kind of person are you?”
“The same as you,” she screams. “Low and pathetic.”
“Maybe so,” I growl. “But that’s why it should have ended. You know as well as I do there is no hope here. Why would you fuckin’ keep me here when you never wanted it either?”
“Just say it,” she yells, throwing the phone. “Don’t put it back on me. Admit what you’ve wanted to admit for years. Admit that you don’t love me anymore.”
I take a step forward, getting in her face. “I don’t love you anymore.”
She reaches out and she slaps me hard. My head jerks to the side and I grind my jaw.
“I don’t love you either, you piece of shit,” she screams. “In fact, I hate you.”
“Hate me?” I laugh cruelly. “If you hate me then why lie? Why not let me go?”
“Because I have nothing without you.”
My eyes widen and I take a step back. I’m sure I’ve heard her wrong.
“What did you say?”
“Oh, come off it, Nate. You know as well as I do this relationship has been dead for longer than it was alive. You stay because of Macy, and that’s okay because it’s such a noble fucking thing to do. Well, I stay for the money. I have no family to turn to, no people to take care of me. Without you I have nothing.”
My blood boils. “All along I’ve been fighting for my daughter, and you’ve been fighting for . . . money?”
She shrugs. “I need a life too.”
“What about Macy? Where does she fall in all this?”
“I love our daughter, but you know I never wanted kids.”
Boiling point. I’ve reached boiling point. I knew Lena was money hungry—she always had been, it’s why she never wanted me to stop racing—but to think that I’ve lived through this hell all because she didn’t want her gravy train to end has everything inside me snapping.
“How. Dare. You?”
She laughs angrily. “How dare you? You disrespected me by fucking that . . . whore. You’re no better than me.”
“No,” I say. “You’re right, I’m not. But I stayed with you because I wanted the best for my daughter, when all along all you cared about was money. You don’t deserve her.”
“You’re not taking her, Nate. She’s my daughter and you know I’ll get the rights.”
I get up in her face. “Like fuck I’m not. She’s coming with me and so help me God, Lena, if you try to fight me I will take you down.”
“You’re not just going to leave me with nothing! I’ll fight you, Nate,” she screams.
“What is it you want?” I bellow. “Money? You want money to leave us the fuck alone? Fine, I’ll give you as much as you need. But you will not take my daughter and let her live the horrible life you choose to inflict on yourself.”
“Three hundred thousand.”
My mouth drops open at the cold, hard person I’m seeing before me. She didn’t even hesitate, didn’t even try . . .
“Nothing? Nothing at all?” I rasp. “She’s your daughter.”
“And all I’ve ever done is let her down; you make that clear daily. She’s better off with you, Nate. I care about her enough to know that.”
“You were going to use her, weren’t you? To get what you wanted.”
“I’m done here. Talking about this won’t change it. If it’s done, Nate, then end it and move on.”
I shake my head, sad and angry that the woman I once loved turned into this.
“What were you doing?” I ask, keeping my voice steady.
“I was just on the phone with the doctor.”
Liar. Liar. Fucking Liar.
“Right, well, don’t you have a treatment today? I’m coming with you to this one, like it or not.”
Her face pales. God, how did I not notice this before? All along she’s been dancing around this, going to “appointments” by herself. How could I be so fucking naïve?
“I prefer to go alone, Nate. You know it makes me feel ill. I don’t want you to see me like that.”
“I’m your husband, I’ve seen you give birth. It’s fine.”
“Nate, please, why do we have to argue about this?”
“What is it you’ve got exactly?” I say, glaring at her.
She stares at me, narrowing her eyes. “You know what I’ve got.”
“Refresh me.”
Finally, she clues on. “What’s going on, Nate?”
“I want to see a doctor’s report.”
“Why?” she cries.
“Because you’re a fuckin’ liar, that’s why,” I roar, finally losing my shit.
Her face falls and her face falls. “Nate, please . . .”
“Did you really think I wouldn’t find out?” I hiss, stepping forward. She takes a step back until we’re both in the room.
“You were going to leave me,” she sobs. “You were going to go off with her.”
“How do you even know about her?” I bellow.
“I’m not fucking stupid. I saw the way you looked at her. It wasn’t hard to figure out. Then I saw a message on your phone a few months ago and I knew.”
“So you lied, you made a mockery of sick people so I wouldn’t leave? What kind of person are you?”
“The same as you,” she screams. “Low and pathetic.”
“Maybe so,” I growl. “But that’s why it should have ended. You know as well as I do there is no hope here. Why would you fuckin’ keep me here when you never wanted it either?”
“Just say it,” she yells, throwing the phone. “Don’t put it back on me. Admit what you’ve wanted to admit for years. Admit that you don’t love me anymore.”
I take a step forward, getting in her face. “I don’t love you anymore.”
She reaches out and she slaps me hard. My head jerks to the side and I grind my jaw.
“I don’t love you either, you piece of shit,” she screams. “In fact, I hate you.”
“Hate me?” I laugh cruelly. “If you hate me then why lie? Why not let me go?”
“Because I have nothing without you.”
My eyes widen and I take a step back. I’m sure I’ve heard her wrong.
“What did you say?”
“Oh, come off it, Nate. You know as well as I do this relationship has been dead for longer than it was alive. You stay because of Macy, and that’s okay because it’s such a noble fucking thing to do. Well, I stay for the money. I have no family to turn to, no people to take care of me. Without you I have nothing.”
My blood boils. “All along I’ve been fighting for my daughter, and you’ve been fighting for . . . money?”
She shrugs. “I need a life too.”
“What about Macy? Where does she fall in all this?”
“I love our daughter, but you know I never wanted kids.”
Boiling point. I’ve reached boiling point. I knew Lena was money hungry—she always had been, it’s why she never wanted me to stop racing—but to think that I’ve lived through this hell all because she didn’t want her gravy train to end has everything inside me snapping.
“How. Dare. You?”
She laughs angrily. “How dare you? You disrespected me by fucking that . . . whore. You’re no better than me.”
“No,” I say. “You’re right, I’m not. But I stayed with you because I wanted the best for my daughter, when all along all you cared about was money. You don’t deserve her.”
“You’re not taking her, Nate. She’s my daughter and you know I’ll get the rights.”
I get up in her face. “Like fuck I’m not. She’s coming with me and so help me God, Lena, if you try to fight me I will take you down.”
“You’re not just going to leave me with nothing! I’ll fight you, Nate,” she screams.
“What is it you want?” I bellow. “Money? You want money to leave us the fuck alone? Fine, I’ll give you as much as you need. But you will not take my daughter and let her live the horrible life you choose to inflict on yourself.”
“Three hundred thousand.”
My mouth drops open at the cold, hard person I’m seeing before me. She didn’t even hesitate, didn’t even try . . .
“Nothing? Nothing at all?” I rasp. “She’s your daughter.”
“And all I’ve ever done is let her down; you make that clear daily. She’s better off with you, Nate. I care about her enough to know that.”
“You were going to use her, weren’t you? To get what you wanted.”
“I’m done here. Talking about this won’t change it. If it’s done, Nate, then end it and move on.”
I shake my head, sad and angry that the woman I once loved turned into this.
