Pretend

Page 67

The muscles in Gavin’s body seized up. Mason could pretend all he wanted, but something was wrong. He could feel it.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
Showers were one of the best ways to clear your head. Orgasms were the first, so Mason decided today called for both. He finished his shower with the purpose of letting Gavin fuck his brains out, and then he would sit down and talk to his lover. There had to be a reasonable explanation. He trusted Gavin’s opinion, and he knew Gavin would do whatever he could to help. It’s the kind of man he was. The kind Mason wanted to be, and part of the reason Mason loved him so damn much.
He pulled on a pair of underwear. The soft sound of his phone vibrating in his jeans grabbed his attention, so Mason pulled it from the pocket.
Braden.
It wasn’t often the man called him, and he wasn’t sure why he would be now. He almost ignored it, but something made him hit answer. “Hello.”
“Hey, man. How’s it going?”
Shitty. “Alright, and you?”
“Good. Listen, I’m about to overstep my bounds, and I want you to know that I get that. Tell me to shut the fuck up. I’m used to it. But knowing that I should keep my mouth shut has never made me do it in the past, and I don’t plan on starting now. If you’re the kind of man I think you are, you’ll be damn glad I spoke up.”
Mason leaned against the counter, feeling a tightness in his chest. “What’s going on with Gavin?”
What else could it be?
“He has a job opportunity, running a music program through the school district. It’s not a guarantee. He needs to get his licensing and a few other things taken care of ASAP, but I wanted you to know about it. Like I said, tell me to shut the fuck up and mind my own business. I probably deserve it, but whether you know it or not, you were there for me when shit hit the fan with Wes, so I thought I would return the favor. I think he needs to do this but I don’t think he will. Not if he doesn’t know you’re on board. He’s thinking about his parents and the bar and, fuck, no offense man, but he needs to be thinking about himself. I just don’t want to see him pass something up and regret it later. That shit will eat a hole through your relationship faster than anything else.”
Mason closed his eyes. Shook his head. Motherfucker. Braden was right. Gavin missed teaching. He was sure of that. But even if Gavin didn’t, it was a decision he needed to make for himself—not because of Mason or his parents or anything else.
From the day he hired Gavin, he knew the man wouldn’t be working with him forever. It wasn’t where his heart lay. The closer they’d gotten, he let himself forget that. Forget it because he liked having Gavin around. Forget it because he needed Gavin in more ways than just their relationship.
“Fuck,” Mason groaned. “Thanks for telling me. I’ll take care of it,” and then he hung up the phone.
Gavin had walked away from his job and regretted it. He hadn’t fought for it. He’d accepted the loss just like he’d accepted the loss of any real kind of life, using his family and his job as an excuse. Mason wouldn’t be an excuse for him. He wouldn’t be the reason Gavin let life pass him by. From the beginning that hadn’t been what they were about, yet he planned on asking Gavin to take over his bar so he could go to Durango for who knew how long? It could be months.
And Gavin would have done it. Would have done it because that’s the kind of guy he was, giving. Would have done it because Mason was now to him the same as his job had been before. He still wasn’t living for Gavin. He lived for Mason, for his parents, letting his own desires fall to the wayside.
And Mason would have let him because that’s who he’d always been as well. Selfish. Because he wanted it all; in a way, like Isaac. He wanted his bar to flourish, and to fix the shit with his family and their business. It was time to realize that he couldn’t do it all. Sometimes a man had to make sacrifices for those he loved. He wouldn’t hold Gavin back.
***
Mason walked into the bedroom in nothing except his underwear, just as Gavin put his guitar away. Gavin watched as he paced the room for a minute before sitting on the edge of the bed.
Gavin waited for him to speak, seeing that his lover had something to say. It took a minute, but then he said, “We need to talk.”
Crossing his arms, Gavin leaned against the wall. “I can tell.” Anger suddenly teased him. He wasn’t totally sure why he was mad, but he had a feeling he wouldn’t like what Mason was about to say.
Mason looked up at him from where he sat on the bed. His features were hard, his eyes detached. The look made Gavin’s gut roll.