Revealed: The Missing Years
Page 94
Inhaling, she continued, “I didn’t, because I was afraid. I was afraid that if I did, and failed, you’d punish me, hurt me.”
She’d been right: he needed to leave. They’d never get beyond this. Just as he was about to stand, Claire’s hands framed his cheeks and pulled his gaze back to hers. With a softer tone, she explained, “That physical pain I feared was nothing—nothing—compared to the pain of thinking you no longer cared. These last two weeks have been hell. They taught me that pain can be present, despite every physical need being met.”
Unable to stop the moisture that threatened his eyes, Tony reiterated, “The divorce wasn’t meant to hurt you.”
Unexpectedly, she wrapped her arms around his neck and brushed his lips with a kiss. “Tony, maybe I should be upset that you’ve had me followed, but I’m not.” Was it happiness he heard? “Honestly, I’m relieved. I didn’t think you cared anymore.”
The tears faded as the tips of his lips moved upward. When she returned his grin, he pushed her back onto the bed and covered her body with his. “Mrs. Rawlings, I will always care and always love you. I promised you that almost six years ago.”
He had. The realization hit him. He had promised that. If he didn’t follow through on the divorce, it wasn’t because he wasn’t a man of his word—it was because he was. Tony had vowed to love her and care for her forever—twice. Claire didn’t protest as his weight held her to the soft satin comforter. Removing his shirt, he added, “I’ve told you that I am, and despite it all, I continue to be, a man of my word.”
Instead of replying, her soft hands caressed his chest as his lips trailed across her exposed collarbone and he unbuttoned her blouse. With each button he trailed a kiss lower and lower until her blouse was open and he reached the top of her slacks. Easing them down her legs he continued to worship the woman beneath him. When his lips weren’t caressing her skin, they were speaking, telling her how much he’d missed her, how much he wanted her, and how much he loved her.
She reached for his face and lifted his eyes to hers, as she asked, “If we do this, if we reunite—can I trust you not to leave me, again?”
There was no way he could leave her. “I wanted to protect you. The divorce was only to keep you from getting hurt—by me.”
“Don’t you see? Not being with you hurt me. Every day hurt more than the one before.”
Tony agreed. “It was agony. When I was in prison and we were separated by distance, it sounded good in principle, but seeing you.” He lifted his head and looked down at her now nearly naked body. “And touching you.” The tips of his fingers softly trailed the warm flesh from her neck to the band of her lace panties. “And not being allowed to taste you.” His lips seized a now exposed nipple and gently tugged while his tongue swirled the hardening nub, eliciting moans that he loved to hear. “Was agony.”
Before he could continue his seduction, Claire said, “First—first, I have a request.”
A memory of a request in paradise, one made more than once, entered his mind and he grinned. Raising his brow he mused, “Yes? I think I might like this. Does it involve black satin?”
Claire snickered. “No. I want you to promise that you won’t leave me, no more talk of divorce—ever. I want my happily ever after. Despite everything, I trust you and your word. If you tell me you’ll never divorce me or discuss it, I’ll believe you.”
His heart soared. The woman beneath him was everything he wanted and more than he deserved. He wanted what she wanted, though he’d never imagined it had been within his reach. Between kisses he said, “You, my dear, are my drug. I’m so damn addicted that I can’t quit you. I know, because I’ve tried—not for me, but for you. I failed miserably. The more I have of you, the more I need. I can never get enough. If you’ll have me back—after all, this is your estate—if you’ll allow me to move back, I’ll try every day to give you exactly what you deserve. And I promise I will never mention divorce again.”
They kissed with a passion like no one had ever experienced. It was the culmination of years of separation. It was the release of their past pain. They’d both caused it and both suffered. It was the promise of a future: one filled with endless possibilities. It was filled with a hunger that only the other could calm. She was his, and he was hers. While her nails bit into his shoulders, his fingers teased and taunted.
Breaking the spell, Tony looked into her gorgeous eyes. “I want you so badly, but I need to be honest. I can’t promise you the happy ever after. Not because you don’t deserve one, but because I know myself, and I’ll probably screw it up; however, I can promise that I’ll spend the rest of my life trying. Is that enough for you?”
Tony awaited her response as tears cascaded from the corners of her emerald eyes. He could stare into her gaze forever: only her answer would tell him if that were possible.
“Tony, it’s more than enough. I promise that I’ll never drive away to leave you again, and I’ll never listen to anyone else without learning the truth from you, but…” She paused to deliver a wonderful assault of kisses to his neck, one of the places that drove him crazy and elicited growls he couldn’t control. “I will drive away, to multiple places.”
He wouldn’t argue. Bold and cheeky was still his favorite.
Claire continued with a smile, “And I’ll travel easier knowing Phil is there when you can’t be.”
She’d been right: he needed to leave. They’d never get beyond this. Just as he was about to stand, Claire’s hands framed his cheeks and pulled his gaze back to hers. With a softer tone, she explained, “That physical pain I feared was nothing—nothing—compared to the pain of thinking you no longer cared. These last two weeks have been hell. They taught me that pain can be present, despite every physical need being met.”
Unable to stop the moisture that threatened his eyes, Tony reiterated, “The divorce wasn’t meant to hurt you.”
Unexpectedly, she wrapped her arms around his neck and brushed his lips with a kiss. “Tony, maybe I should be upset that you’ve had me followed, but I’m not.” Was it happiness he heard? “Honestly, I’m relieved. I didn’t think you cared anymore.”
The tears faded as the tips of his lips moved upward. When she returned his grin, he pushed her back onto the bed and covered her body with his. “Mrs. Rawlings, I will always care and always love you. I promised you that almost six years ago.”
He had. The realization hit him. He had promised that. If he didn’t follow through on the divorce, it wasn’t because he wasn’t a man of his word—it was because he was. Tony had vowed to love her and care for her forever—twice. Claire didn’t protest as his weight held her to the soft satin comforter. Removing his shirt, he added, “I’ve told you that I am, and despite it all, I continue to be, a man of my word.”
Instead of replying, her soft hands caressed his chest as his lips trailed across her exposed collarbone and he unbuttoned her blouse. With each button he trailed a kiss lower and lower until her blouse was open and he reached the top of her slacks. Easing them down her legs he continued to worship the woman beneath him. When his lips weren’t caressing her skin, they were speaking, telling her how much he’d missed her, how much he wanted her, and how much he loved her.
She reached for his face and lifted his eyes to hers, as she asked, “If we do this, if we reunite—can I trust you not to leave me, again?”
There was no way he could leave her. “I wanted to protect you. The divorce was only to keep you from getting hurt—by me.”
“Don’t you see? Not being with you hurt me. Every day hurt more than the one before.”
Tony agreed. “It was agony. When I was in prison and we were separated by distance, it sounded good in principle, but seeing you.” He lifted his head and looked down at her now nearly naked body. “And touching you.” The tips of his fingers softly trailed the warm flesh from her neck to the band of her lace panties. “And not being allowed to taste you.” His lips seized a now exposed nipple and gently tugged while his tongue swirled the hardening nub, eliciting moans that he loved to hear. “Was agony.”
Before he could continue his seduction, Claire said, “First—first, I have a request.”
A memory of a request in paradise, one made more than once, entered his mind and he grinned. Raising his brow he mused, “Yes? I think I might like this. Does it involve black satin?”
Claire snickered. “No. I want you to promise that you won’t leave me, no more talk of divorce—ever. I want my happily ever after. Despite everything, I trust you and your word. If you tell me you’ll never divorce me or discuss it, I’ll believe you.”
His heart soared. The woman beneath him was everything he wanted and more than he deserved. He wanted what she wanted, though he’d never imagined it had been within his reach. Between kisses he said, “You, my dear, are my drug. I’m so damn addicted that I can’t quit you. I know, because I’ve tried—not for me, but for you. I failed miserably. The more I have of you, the more I need. I can never get enough. If you’ll have me back—after all, this is your estate—if you’ll allow me to move back, I’ll try every day to give you exactly what you deserve. And I promise I will never mention divorce again.”
They kissed with a passion like no one had ever experienced. It was the culmination of years of separation. It was the release of their past pain. They’d both caused it and both suffered. It was the promise of a future: one filled with endless possibilities. It was filled with a hunger that only the other could calm. She was his, and he was hers. While her nails bit into his shoulders, his fingers teased and taunted.
Breaking the spell, Tony looked into her gorgeous eyes. “I want you so badly, but I need to be honest. I can’t promise you the happy ever after. Not because you don’t deserve one, but because I know myself, and I’ll probably screw it up; however, I can promise that I’ll spend the rest of my life trying. Is that enough for you?”
Tony awaited her response as tears cascaded from the corners of her emerald eyes. He could stare into her gaze forever: only her answer would tell him if that were possible.
“Tony, it’s more than enough. I promise that I’ll never drive away to leave you again, and I’ll never listen to anyone else without learning the truth from you, but…” She paused to deliver a wonderful assault of kisses to his neck, one of the places that drove him crazy and elicited growls he couldn’t control. “I will drive away, to multiple places.”
He wouldn’t argue. Bold and cheeky was still his favorite.
Claire continued with a smile, “And I’ll travel easier knowing Phil is there when you can’t be.”
