Shadowfever
Page 156
I inhaled sharply. That was exactly the frame of mind Id been in when Id thought Barrons was dead. Hunting the Book, ready to pick it up and merge with it and unmake the world. Believing I would be able to control it.
But I was on guard now. Id experienced that grief once. Besides, I had Darrocs shortcut in my hand. I had the key to controlling it. I wasnt going to flip. Barrons was alive. My parents were well. I wouldnt even be tempted.
I was suddenly impatient to get it over with. Before anything could go wrong.
I need to be certain you can use the amulet.
How?
Deceive me, he said flatly. And convince me of it.
I fisted my hand around the amulet and closed my eyes. Long ago, in Mallucs grotto, it had not been willing to work for me. It had wanted something, had waited for what Id thought was a tithe, as if I needed to spill blood for it or something.
I knew now it was much simpler than that. It had flared with blue-black brilliance for the same reason the stones did, because it recognized me.
The problem was I hadnt recognized myself.
I did now.
I am your king. You belong to me. You will obey me in all things.
I gasped with pleasure as it blazed in my fist, brighter than it had ever burned for Darroc.
I looked around the bedroom. I remembered the basement where I had been Pri-ya. I would never forget any of the details.
I re-created it now for us, down to the last detail: pictures of Alina and me, crimson silk sheets, a shower in the corner, a Christmas tree twinkling, fur-lined handcuffs on the bed. For a time, it had been the happiest, simplest place Id ever known.
Not exactly incentive to get me out of here.
We have to save the world, I reminded.
He reached for me. The world can wait. I cant.
45
I knew the moment he began to reconsider.
I could feel the tension in his body, see the tightening around his eyes, which meant he was thinking hard and not liking the topic. Its not enough of a plan, he said finally, and got out of bed.
It was nearly impossible to make myself move. I wanted to stay in bed forever. But until this was over, no one I cared about was safe and I wasnt going to be able to relax and get on with life. I pushed up, tugged on my jeans, buttoned the fly, and yanked my shirt over my head.
What do you suggest? That we get everyone together and make them all hold the amulet? See if it responds to anyone else? What if it lights up for someone like, say, Rowena?
He glared at me as I slipped the amulet around my neck and tucked it beneath my shirt, where it lay cool against my skin. I could see the strange dark light of it through my shirt. I tugged my leather jacket on over it and belted it.
It didnt flare withblue-black light for him. I knew if it had, and hed known what the second prophecy said, hed have gone after the Book long ago.
I dont like this one bit.
Neither did I, but I didnt see any alternative. You helped make this plan.
That was hours ago. Now were about to walk out into the streets and youre going to pick the bloody thing up, believing in some prophecy scribbled by a mad washerwoman who used to work at the abbey, with no concrete idea what to do, trusting that the amulet will help you deceive it into submission. Its the ultimate in seductive evil, and you expect to wing it. The plan stinks. Thats all there is to it. I dont trust Rowena. I dont trust
Anyone, I finished. You dont trust anyone. Except yourself, and thats not trust, thats ego.
Not ego. Awareness of my abilities. And the limitless nature of them.
You got killed on a cliff by Ryodan and me. Classic case of a time when a little trust might have gone a long way.
His eyes were black and bottomless. I was just about to look away when something moved in them. I trust you.
I felt like hed handed me the keys to the kingdom. That sealed it: I could do anything. Prove it. Youve been training me since the moment I got here to make me strong enough, smart enough, tough enough to do whatever has to be done. Ive been through hell and back and survived. Look at me. What is it you say? See me. You made me a fighter. Now let me fight.
I fight the battles.
You are fighting this battle. Were going after it together.
Watching. Whos driving this motorcycle and whos in the bloody sidecar? I dont ride in the sidecar. I wouldnt even own a pussy bike with a sidecar. He looked aggrieved to the bottom of his soul.
More than watching. Keeping me tethered, like you did when I was Pri-ya and couldnt find my way back. I never would have made it without you, Jericho. I was lost, but I could feel you there, grounding me, holding my kite string. Hed stalked into hell for me, sat down on my sprung sofa in my insane place, and kept me from being stuck there forever. Hed dragged me out by sheer force of will. He always would. I need you, I said simply.
A haze of crimson stained his eyes. He pulled a sweater over his head, muscles flexing, tattoos rippling. Its not too late, he said roughly. We can let the world go to hell. There are other worlds. Plenty of them. We can even take your parents. Whoever you want.
I searched his eyes. He meant it. Hed leave with me, go through the Silvers, and live somewhere else. I like this world.
But I was on guard now. Id experienced that grief once. Besides, I had Darrocs shortcut in my hand. I had the key to controlling it. I wasnt going to flip. Barrons was alive. My parents were well. I wouldnt even be tempted.
I was suddenly impatient to get it over with. Before anything could go wrong.
I need to be certain you can use the amulet.
How?
Deceive me, he said flatly. And convince me of it.
I fisted my hand around the amulet and closed my eyes. Long ago, in Mallucs grotto, it had not been willing to work for me. It had wanted something, had waited for what Id thought was a tithe, as if I needed to spill blood for it or something.
I knew now it was much simpler than that. It had flared with blue-black brilliance for the same reason the stones did, because it recognized me.
The problem was I hadnt recognized myself.
I did now.
I am your king. You belong to me. You will obey me in all things.
I gasped with pleasure as it blazed in my fist, brighter than it had ever burned for Darroc.
I looked around the bedroom. I remembered the basement where I had been Pri-ya. I would never forget any of the details.
I re-created it now for us, down to the last detail: pictures of Alina and me, crimson silk sheets, a shower in the corner, a Christmas tree twinkling, fur-lined handcuffs on the bed. For a time, it had been the happiest, simplest place Id ever known.
Not exactly incentive to get me out of here.
We have to save the world, I reminded.
He reached for me. The world can wait. I cant.
45
I knew the moment he began to reconsider.
I could feel the tension in his body, see the tightening around his eyes, which meant he was thinking hard and not liking the topic. Its not enough of a plan, he said finally, and got out of bed.
It was nearly impossible to make myself move. I wanted to stay in bed forever. But until this was over, no one I cared about was safe and I wasnt going to be able to relax and get on with life. I pushed up, tugged on my jeans, buttoned the fly, and yanked my shirt over my head.
What do you suggest? That we get everyone together and make them all hold the amulet? See if it responds to anyone else? What if it lights up for someone like, say, Rowena?
He glared at me as I slipped the amulet around my neck and tucked it beneath my shirt, where it lay cool against my skin. I could see the strange dark light of it through my shirt. I tugged my leather jacket on over it and belted it.
It didnt flare withblue-black light for him. I knew if it had, and hed known what the second prophecy said, hed have gone after the Book long ago.
I dont like this one bit.
Neither did I, but I didnt see any alternative. You helped make this plan.
That was hours ago. Now were about to walk out into the streets and youre going to pick the bloody thing up, believing in some prophecy scribbled by a mad washerwoman who used to work at the abbey, with no concrete idea what to do, trusting that the amulet will help you deceive it into submission. Its the ultimate in seductive evil, and you expect to wing it. The plan stinks. Thats all there is to it. I dont trust Rowena. I dont trust
Anyone, I finished. You dont trust anyone. Except yourself, and thats not trust, thats ego.
Not ego. Awareness of my abilities. And the limitless nature of them.
You got killed on a cliff by Ryodan and me. Classic case of a time when a little trust might have gone a long way.
His eyes were black and bottomless. I was just about to look away when something moved in them. I trust you.
I felt like hed handed me the keys to the kingdom. That sealed it: I could do anything. Prove it. Youve been training me since the moment I got here to make me strong enough, smart enough, tough enough to do whatever has to be done. Ive been through hell and back and survived. Look at me. What is it you say? See me. You made me a fighter. Now let me fight.
I fight the battles.
You are fighting this battle. Were going after it together.
Watching. Whos driving this motorcycle and whos in the bloody sidecar? I dont ride in the sidecar. I wouldnt even own a pussy bike with a sidecar. He looked aggrieved to the bottom of his soul.
More than watching. Keeping me tethered, like you did when I was Pri-ya and couldnt find my way back. I never would have made it without you, Jericho. I was lost, but I could feel you there, grounding me, holding my kite string. Hed stalked into hell for me, sat down on my sprung sofa in my insane place, and kept me from being stuck there forever. Hed dragged me out by sheer force of will. He always would. I need you, I said simply.
A haze of crimson stained his eyes. He pulled a sweater over his head, muscles flexing, tattoos rippling. Its not too late, he said roughly. We can let the world go to hell. There are other worlds. Plenty of them. We can even take your parents. Whoever you want.
I searched his eyes. He meant it. Hed leave with me, go through the Silvers, and live somewhere else. I like this world.