Sweet Hope
Page 48
Aliyana was silent, Hinder’s “Lips of An Angel” playing through the speakers, the only sound in the studio.
“You had your best friend killed…” she murmured somberly. I had to look away, suddenly consumed with grief.
“I can’t imagine having to make that choice. It would be like me choosing to kill Molly to save Rome. It would be… impossible. I couldn’t live with myself.”
The constant weight that pressed on my chest lightened some as she understood what my everyday was like. I heard the sadness in her voice. She fucking understood what having Gio killed did to me, still did to me. She understood the gravity of the hardest choice I’d ever made.
Aliyana’s lips pressed on my skin giving me strength and she asked, “How did you meet Gio? How did you even get involved with that gang?”
Whether I wanted to or not, that question took me straight back to the past…
Chapter Fourteen
Axel
Westside Heights Trailer Park
Tuscaloosa, Alabama
Eighteen years ago…
Walking into the trailer, a two-year-old Levi wriggling in my arms, I saw Austin sitting on the couch, his head down and crying.
As I approached him I could see blood on his face and a bruise forming on his eye. “Aust? What’s happened?” I asked and rushed to bend down in front of him. I put Levi on the floor, passing him a broken toy truck, then turned to Austin and forced his hands from his face. Austin tried to fight me seeing him, but I was stronger and he couldn’t fight me off. As I pulled down his hands, Austin didn’t meet my eyes, but I could see the state of his face.
Anger made me shake. “Who did this to you?” I snapped. Austin winced as I pressed my fingers against his swelling eye.
“Austin!” I shouted, Levi jumping in shock at my angry voice as he played on the floor.
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” Austin said, his voice catching because he was crying.
“Well I do,” I said and wiped his tears away with my thumbs. “Tell me who hit you. I’m gonna kill them!”
Austin lifted his head and sighed. “Just some older kids from school, Axe. You don’t know them.”
“Why did they hit you?” I asked. Reaching for a dishtowel, I began wiping away the blood off his face. Levi pulled himself up to stand on the sofa, crawling into Austin’s lap.
“Hey, fratellino,” Austin greeted Levi and he hugged Levi to his chest, Levi’s chubby arms hugging him back.
“Austin?” I pushed again. “Why did they beat you up?”
Austin’s eyes narrowed. “Have you seen me, Axe?” Austin used his hand to point to his clothes. “I’m poor. My clothes are all too small, my sneakers are old and they hurt my feet, but Papa won’t let Mamma buy us new clothes. The kids at school… they make fun of me.”
Dropping the towel to the floor, I pressed my hand over my stomach. It felt like someone had kicked me... They make fun of me…
“I get it everyday, Axe. I ain’t you. No one’s scared of me.” Austin’s head dropped, his tears splashing on his dirty jeans. “I hate our lives! I hate Papa. I hate that he beats Mamma, makes her work all the time and then spends all the money on drink.”
As I stared at my little brothers, both of them dressed in faded clothes, all of us going hungry, something in me snapped. Jumping to my feet, my insides felt like they were on fire.
“Axe?” Austin’s beaten face was looking up at me from the couch. He was scared.
“Stay with Lev,” I ordered and rushed out of the trailer. I was so angry. So damn angry! Before I knew it, I was sprinting through the trailer park. I kept my eyes staring forward as I ran to the park’s bar, ignoring the Heighters all watching me rush pass them as I pushed through the entrance to the bar.
I stood still and looked for my papa. Hearing a woman laugh, my eyes went to the sound. The laughing woman was sitting on Papa’s lap.
Storming over to where he was, I stood beside him and pushed on his big arm. His eyes snapped to mine and disgust built on his face.
“What the fuck are you doing here, boy?” he slurred drunkenly.
Sucking in a deep breath, I said, “I need money. Austin and Levi need clothes and we need food.”
My papa’s gaze darkened as I said that and he pushed me hard on my chest. I stumbled back as he and the woman laughed.
Gritting my teeth, I ran at my papa and pushed him back. “They need clothes! It’s not fair!” I shouted. “Austin’s getting beat up at school because of it!”
The bar went silent as my papa stared down at me. His skin began turning red and I started backing away. My stomach dropped as I realized what I’d just done. I’d made him mad. Real mad.
In a second Papa had thrown the half naked woman off his lap and reached out to grab me by my neck. He dragged me out of the bar and burst through the doors out into the cool night.
Papa’s free hand gripped onto my hair and he pulled me to face him. “You little cunt! You’re gonna pay for fucking with me!”
His hand let go of my hair and he punched me on the jaw, the pain making my legs weaken then drop to the ground. My scalp burned as my papa kept tight hold of my hair and punched me again in my stomach. He let go of my hair and I fell down. Closing my eyes, I curled my body trying to protect myself from the kick I knew would come next, when suddenly, I heard someone dragging my papa backwards.
Opening my eyes, I saw Remo Marino, the leader of the Heighters, holding my papa by his arms. “What the fuck you doing to that kid, old man?” he asked and I could see my papa fighting to get free.
“You had your best friend killed…” she murmured somberly. I had to look away, suddenly consumed with grief.
“I can’t imagine having to make that choice. It would be like me choosing to kill Molly to save Rome. It would be… impossible. I couldn’t live with myself.”
The constant weight that pressed on my chest lightened some as she understood what my everyday was like. I heard the sadness in her voice. She fucking understood what having Gio killed did to me, still did to me. She understood the gravity of the hardest choice I’d ever made.
Aliyana’s lips pressed on my skin giving me strength and she asked, “How did you meet Gio? How did you even get involved with that gang?”
Whether I wanted to or not, that question took me straight back to the past…
Chapter Fourteen
Axel
Westside Heights Trailer Park
Tuscaloosa, Alabama
Eighteen years ago…
Walking into the trailer, a two-year-old Levi wriggling in my arms, I saw Austin sitting on the couch, his head down and crying.
As I approached him I could see blood on his face and a bruise forming on his eye. “Aust? What’s happened?” I asked and rushed to bend down in front of him. I put Levi on the floor, passing him a broken toy truck, then turned to Austin and forced his hands from his face. Austin tried to fight me seeing him, but I was stronger and he couldn’t fight me off. As I pulled down his hands, Austin didn’t meet my eyes, but I could see the state of his face.
Anger made me shake. “Who did this to you?” I snapped. Austin winced as I pressed my fingers against his swelling eye.
“Austin!” I shouted, Levi jumping in shock at my angry voice as he played on the floor.
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” Austin said, his voice catching because he was crying.
“Well I do,” I said and wiped his tears away with my thumbs. “Tell me who hit you. I’m gonna kill them!”
Austin lifted his head and sighed. “Just some older kids from school, Axe. You don’t know them.”
“Why did they hit you?” I asked. Reaching for a dishtowel, I began wiping away the blood off his face. Levi pulled himself up to stand on the sofa, crawling into Austin’s lap.
“Hey, fratellino,” Austin greeted Levi and he hugged Levi to his chest, Levi’s chubby arms hugging him back.
“Austin?” I pushed again. “Why did they beat you up?”
Austin’s eyes narrowed. “Have you seen me, Axe?” Austin used his hand to point to his clothes. “I’m poor. My clothes are all too small, my sneakers are old and they hurt my feet, but Papa won’t let Mamma buy us new clothes. The kids at school… they make fun of me.”
Dropping the towel to the floor, I pressed my hand over my stomach. It felt like someone had kicked me... They make fun of me…
“I get it everyday, Axe. I ain’t you. No one’s scared of me.” Austin’s head dropped, his tears splashing on his dirty jeans. “I hate our lives! I hate Papa. I hate that he beats Mamma, makes her work all the time and then spends all the money on drink.”
As I stared at my little brothers, both of them dressed in faded clothes, all of us going hungry, something in me snapped. Jumping to my feet, my insides felt like they were on fire.
“Axe?” Austin’s beaten face was looking up at me from the couch. He was scared.
“Stay with Lev,” I ordered and rushed out of the trailer. I was so angry. So damn angry! Before I knew it, I was sprinting through the trailer park. I kept my eyes staring forward as I ran to the park’s bar, ignoring the Heighters all watching me rush pass them as I pushed through the entrance to the bar.
I stood still and looked for my papa. Hearing a woman laugh, my eyes went to the sound. The laughing woman was sitting on Papa’s lap.
Storming over to where he was, I stood beside him and pushed on his big arm. His eyes snapped to mine and disgust built on his face.
“What the fuck are you doing here, boy?” he slurred drunkenly.
Sucking in a deep breath, I said, “I need money. Austin and Levi need clothes and we need food.”
My papa’s gaze darkened as I said that and he pushed me hard on my chest. I stumbled back as he and the woman laughed.
Gritting my teeth, I ran at my papa and pushed him back. “They need clothes! It’s not fair!” I shouted. “Austin’s getting beat up at school because of it!”
The bar went silent as my papa stared down at me. His skin began turning red and I started backing away. My stomach dropped as I realized what I’d just done. I’d made him mad. Real mad.
In a second Papa had thrown the half naked woman off his lap and reached out to grab me by my neck. He dragged me out of the bar and burst through the doors out into the cool night.
Papa’s free hand gripped onto my hair and he pulled me to face him. “You little cunt! You’re gonna pay for fucking with me!”
His hand let go of my hair and he punched me on the jaw, the pain making my legs weaken then drop to the ground. My scalp burned as my papa kept tight hold of my hair and punched me again in my stomach. He let go of my hair and I fell down. Closing my eyes, I curled my body trying to protect myself from the kick I knew would come next, when suddenly, I heard someone dragging my papa backwards.
Opening my eyes, I saw Remo Marino, the leader of the Heighters, holding my papa by his arms. “What the fuck you doing to that kid, old man?” he asked and I could see my papa fighting to get free.
