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Take a Bow

Page 7

   


Sophie nods at me while she studies my lyrics. “Amazing, Emme. Really amazing.”
I sit down at the keyboard in my room and begin to play the song for Sophie. After a few run-throughs, she begins to sing along. I love this stage of the writing process, when the song is like an intimate secret shared between us. It’s a bond that can’t be broken by school or by anyone. It’s only the two of us.
After we practice for a while, I type out the reworked lyrics. (Hearing Sophie sing always inspires me to make a few changes.) She hesitates before taking the sheet.
“Um, Em, I was hoping you could do me a huge favor.” She begins to curl a long brunette strand of hair between her fingers. She does this when she waits for a callback list to be posted or when she thinks she’s going to say something that will upset me.
I wish I wasn’t so sensitive. I’ve never been tough like her. She’s center stage. I’m background. That’s just the way it has been and always will be.
She sits down next to me on the piano bench and grabs my hand. “I know how extremely busy you’re going to be, and I was hoping you could write out the accompanying part so I could practice with Amanda.”
“Oh.” I try to not sound hurt. Amanda is a junior music student who has been practicing Sophie’s other vocal department songs with her. But the songs I write have always been between the two of us.
“You know that Amanda is nowhere near the pianist that you are, but I really want to do well. It’s senior year and it’s hard for you and me to find the time with our schedules. You understand, don’t you?”
What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t give Sophie every advantage to nail her audition for the performance?
“Of course. I’ll write it up tonight and send it to you.”
“Oh, Emme.” Sophie hugs me. “You’re the greatest friend ever! I’m eternally indebted to you. You are so getting an entire paragraph in the liner notes for my first album. To Emme, who has been my biggest supporter and friend since day one.”
I know that Amanda could never replace me. Really, when I think about it, she’s helping me out. Senior year is going to be busy and I need to let go a little. I don’t have the time and I can’t do it all. If I keep trying to juggle everything, someone is going to end up getting shortchanged and I don’t want to do that to Sophie and the guys, not to mention to my sanity.
After Sophie leaves, something registers in what she said. Her album. We used to discuss how I was going to write and produce her albums. But she hasn’t said anything about me being part of her album in months.
Wow, Emme, needy much? I think.
Senior year hasn’t even started, but I’m already worried about not being a part of an album that doesn’t even exist yet.
I know how much I mean to Sophie. I’ve got to remember her Plan. I’ve always been part of it, a big part of it. And nothing will change that.
“I seriously can’t believe you let her do that,” Ethan whispers to me a week later at the auditions for the freshman welcome program. We’re all lined up in the hallway waiting our turn.
I try to look content as I watch Sophie walk into her audition with Amanda. “She’s been practicing the song more with Amanda than with me,” I explain. “Do I need to remind you that I’ve been a little busy rehearsing with you guys?”
Jack stops twirling his drumsticks for a second. “Yeah, for two hours a day. You’ve got twenty-two other hours for Sophie. But apparently that isn’t enough for the wanna-diva.”
It’s an argument we’ve had a lot. Ever since freshman year, there has been this pull on me between the guys and Sophie. Sophie thinks I spend too much time with them and they — well, they don’t like her.
Ethan motions toward the door to the auditorium stage. “She’s in there right now singing your song. Do you really think you’re going to get the credit for it? You have to remember that this audition is also about you. You are being judged right now … if she even bothers to mention that it’s one of your songs.”
“She would never …” I know there’s no way Sophie would take credit for the song. Everybody knows I write her songs. And she’s been practicing with Amanda more than me, so am I supposed to punish her because I’m the one who’s not available?
They don’t get it. And they never have.
Ethan shakes his head. “She’s already done the unforgivable, if you ask me.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t ask.”
Ben gets up and crouches next to us. “Hey, guys, we’ve got our audition coming up, so can we just concentrate on that, please?”
We both nod.
“Hey, Emme.” Carter comes up to me. “Where’s Sophie?”
I point to the door. “Oh,” he says. “Why aren’t you in there?”
Ethan gets up and walks away. Carter takes his seat.
“She’s in with Amanda.”
“Oh.” Carter looks upset. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
He gives me a look that says No, it’s not. And maybe it isn’t, but there’s nothing I can do about it now. Ben’s right; I’ve got to get my head into our audition. That I can do something about.
I gesture toward the script rolled up in Carter’s hand. “What are you doing?”
He looks at it. “Oh, I’m doing a monologue from Death of a Salesman, but this is the script for tomorrow’s scene.”