The Best Goodbye
Page 27
In the darkness of her room, lit only by moonlight streaming through the one small window above her dresser, we were cocooned in our safe world. The one we created to forget about the evil around us. We didn’t think of our desires as being wrong. We had seen wrong, and we knew this wasn’t it. The feeling was too genuine. Our hearts were leading this. I’d been with girls when it was just about lust. I knew the difference.
Slowly, I slipped a hand under her shirt, and she stilled, her breathing heavy, as I moved it up and over her bra to cup her right breast. She shuddered as I ran my thumb over the pebbled nipple pushing against the worn cotton. I needed more. Tugging down the front, I freed both breasts and moved my other hand up so I had them both full. Addy rolled onto her back and let out a small moan that made my cock jerk in reaction. Her eyes fluttered closed, and she arched her back, giving me more, and I took it. My blood was pumping so hard I could hear it as I slid her shirt off and threw it onto the floor before taking off her bra.
Her eyes opened, and she looked at me with a mix of need and uncertainty.
“You’re beautiful,” I told her, leaning down to press a kiss to her lips.
She opened for me so easily and wrapped her arms around me. Her hard nipples, now bare, pressed into my chest, and my cock twitched again. I began a trail of kisses down her jaw toward her neck and then spent some time on her collarbone, before moving my hands to cup each round, creamy breast. Pale pink nipples, more perfect than anything I’d ever seen, grew even harder as my mouth moved closer, and I pulled one into my mouth.
Addy cried out my name, and her hands went to my head and held on to my hair as she squirmed under me. Tonight I’d have to stop here, but I knew this was just the beginning. I’d been in love with Addy for a while now, but she’d just given me a taste of more. I’d never want anyone but her. This was as close to heaven as any man could get.
Addy
Franny stared at me without saying a word. I was worried that I’d rushed this or that I hadn’t thought it through or that she was upset that I’d kept it from her since we’d arrived.
“So . . . he wants to meet me, too, then?” she finally asked, her eyes big with wonder. This had been her one request for so long. Having it placed in front of her had to be overwhelming. I let out the breath I was holding when I realized her silence wasn’t because she was angry; she was being given something she wanted desperately.
“Yes, he does. Very much. He had no idea you existed. There was a misunderstanding that kept us apart, and it has taken me a very long time to find him. But he’s glad I did. He wants to know you, too, and be a part of your life.”
She scrunched her nose. “Our life, you mean?”
No . . . not ours. Just hers.
I knew that from our conversation last night and from watching him over the past few months. He wasn’t interested in getting to know me. I didn’t appeal to him now. The people we once were no longer existed. Not really.
“He wants to know you, sweetie. You’re his child. We did love each other very much once, and you were conceived from that love. But we’ve grown up and changed since then. We don’t have those feelings anymore.”
Franny nodded as if she understood, but I could tell by the look on her face that she didn’t. Not at all. When you’re nine, it’s hard to make sense of a lot of things. Especially things your mother has a hard time coming to terms with. “Will you be there when I see him?”
“Yes,” I assured her, and she looked relieved.
“OK, when can I see him?”
I knew this would happen. Once she decided on something, she wanted it right then and there. “He said he would be ready when you are,” I replied.
Franny took a deep breath and nodded her head. “I’m ready.”
This was it. All those years of wondering, and this was it. River would be in his daughter’s life. I had wanted this for so long. Franny deserved it. “OK.” I pulled out my phone and texted Captain.
She’s ready to see you.
It wasn’t even thirty seconds before he replied.
Do you want me to come there, or would it be easier on her if we met for ice cream or something?
I looked up at Franny, who was watching me and chewing her bottom lip nervously.
Ice cream would be good, I think.
He replied immediately.
Meet me at the Sugar Shack when you’re ready. I’ll be waiting.
This was going so fast. He’d just seen Franny yesterday, and that was a total accident. Now he was meeting her and officially becoming a part of her life. I looked at my daughter. There was a chance that this could hurt me, but I’d go through any pain for her. If I could just remember that Captain wasn’t my River. Not anymore. I hoped I could trust my heart to realize what my head already did. I wasn’t getting River back.
“We’re going to meet him at the Sugar Shack for ice cream,” I told her with a smile. She had been to the Sugar Shack once. It had been a treat when I got my first paycheck once we moved here. It was a quaint little ice cream parlor full of every candy you could imagine, right on the beach.
She clapped and jumped up. “I’ll go get dressed.”
I watched her run back to the bedroom and hoped I was doing the right thing. If this made her that happy, I feared I was setting her up for potential pain, too. But I had to stick with my decision. My gut said that no matter what, Captain would be there for her. He might have bad taste in women, but that was something I’d discuss with him once we were past this. Franny would have to be the most important girl in his life now.
Slowly, I slipped a hand under her shirt, and she stilled, her breathing heavy, as I moved it up and over her bra to cup her right breast. She shuddered as I ran my thumb over the pebbled nipple pushing against the worn cotton. I needed more. Tugging down the front, I freed both breasts and moved my other hand up so I had them both full. Addy rolled onto her back and let out a small moan that made my cock jerk in reaction. Her eyes fluttered closed, and she arched her back, giving me more, and I took it. My blood was pumping so hard I could hear it as I slid her shirt off and threw it onto the floor before taking off her bra.
Her eyes opened, and she looked at me with a mix of need and uncertainty.
“You’re beautiful,” I told her, leaning down to press a kiss to her lips.
She opened for me so easily and wrapped her arms around me. Her hard nipples, now bare, pressed into my chest, and my cock twitched again. I began a trail of kisses down her jaw toward her neck and then spent some time on her collarbone, before moving my hands to cup each round, creamy breast. Pale pink nipples, more perfect than anything I’d ever seen, grew even harder as my mouth moved closer, and I pulled one into my mouth.
Addy cried out my name, and her hands went to my head and held on to my hair as she squirmed under me. Tonight I’d have to stop here, but I knew this was just the beginning. I’d been in love with Addy for a while now, but she’d just given me a taste of more. I’d never want anyone but her. This was as close to heaven as any man could get.
Addy
Franny stared at me without saying a word. I was worried that I’d rushed this or that I hadn’t thought it through or that she was upset that I’d kept it from her since we’d arrived.
“So . . . he wants to meet me, too, then?” she finally asked, her eyes big with wonder. This had been her one request for so long. Having it placed in front of her had to be overwhelming. I let out the breath I was holding when I realized her silence wasn’t because she was angry; she was being given something she wanted desperately.
“Yes, he does. Very much. He had no idea you existed. There was a misunderstanding that kept us apart, and it has taken me a very long time to find him. But he’s glad I did. He wants to know you, too, and be a part of your life.”
She scrunched her nose. “Our life, you mean?”
No . . . not ours. Just hers.
I knew that from our conversation last night and from watching him over the past few months. He wasn’t interested in getting to know me. I didn’t appeal to him now. The people we once were no longer existed. Not really.
“He wants to know you, sweetie. You’re his child. We did love each other very much once, and you were conceived from that love. But we’ve grown up and changed since then. We don’t have those feelings anymore.”
Franny nodded as if she understood, but I could tell by the look on her face that she didn’t. Not at all. When you’re nine, it’s hard to make sense of a lot of things. Especially things your mother has a hard time coming to terms with. “Will you be there when I see him?”
“Yes,” I assured her, and she looked relieved.
“OK, when can I see him?”
I knew this would happen. Once she decided on something, she wanted it right then and there. “He said he would be ready when you are,” I replied.
Franny took a deep breath and nodded her head. “I’m ready.”
This was it. All those years of wondering, and this was it. River would be in his daughter’s life. I had wanted this for so long. Franny deserved it. “OK.” I pulled out my phone and texted Captain.
She’s ready to see you.
It wasn’t even thirty seconds before he replied.
Do you want me to come there, or would it be easier on her if we met for ice cream or something?
I looked up at Franny, who was watching me and chewing her bottom lip nervously.
Ice cream would be good, I think.
He replied immediately.
Meet me at the Sugar Shack when you’re ready. I’ll be waiting.
This was going so fast. He’d just seen Franny yesterday, and that was a total accident. Now he was meeting her and officially becoming a part of her life. I looked at my daughter. There was a chance that this could hurt me, but I’d go through any pain for her. If I could just remember that Captain wasn’t my River. Not anymore. I hoped I could trust my heart to realize what my head already did. I wasn’t getting River back.
“We’re going to meet him at the Sugar Shack for ice cream,” I told her with a smile. She had been to the Sugar Shack once. It had been a treat when I got my first paycheck once we moved here. It was a quaint little ice cream parlor full of every candy you could imagine, right on the beach.
She clapped and jumped up. “I’ll go get dressed.”
I watched her run back to the bedroom and hoped I was doing the right thing. If this made her that happy, I feared I was setting her up for potential pain, too. But I had to stick with my decision. My gut said that no matter what, Captain would be there for her. He might have bad taste in women, but that was something I’d discuss with him once we were past this. Franny would have to be the most important girl in his life now.
