The Best Goodbye
Page 40
“I can see why,” he replied, and she beamed even brighter.
When he lifted his gaze, it locked on me, and I wished my heart didn’t beat a little faster. This was not what we needed. It was not what he wanted. It was a big mistake for me to be attracted to him. It was an even bigger mistake to feel things for him. He could destroy me.
“Like mother, like daughter,” he said with a slow grin. “Ain’t every day a man gets to take out two of the prettiest girls in town.”
Franny giggled and turned to look back at me. I managed to get hold of myself and smile back. I walked over to the sideboard, where I had left my purse. With my back turned, I took a deep breath and gave myself a small pep talk in my head.
“All right, lucky man, let’s go.” I tried to sound teasing, but I was afraid my voice wavered a little.
Captain held out his hand to Franny, who instantly stuck her small hand in his and led him out the door. I wanted to stop walking and just watch them go. He was so big and masculine, and at times he seemed dangerous. But seeing him with Franny’s little hand in his, her head tilted up, chatting away, was breathtaking.
I touched my stomach and ordered my ovaries to calm down before they combusted. Get over it, Addy.
Franny climbed into the front of Captain’s truck and tried to scoot over so I could fit, too. But I needed the space to get myself together again. I opted to get into the back of his extended cab. Franny buckled up happily and began to tell Captain about every moment of her day.
I listened to him respond when he needed to, and it was obvious he was enjoying himself. I couldn’t imagine him leaving Rosemary Beach. Not when he wanted this relationship. For Franny’s sake, this was another conversation I’d have to have with him.
Deep down, I knew that I didn’t want him to leave for selfish reasons as well. Although Addy came first in all things, for the first time since I’d held her in my arms, I wanted something for me, too. Something I could never have, so I had to deal with it, and fast. Franny’s happiness came first.
Captain
I couldn’t get out of my truck fast enough. Chatting with Franny was incredible. She wanted to tell me everything, and I loved it. But God help me, Addy smelled so damn good my hands were sweating. Her scent had engulfed my truck, and every small move she made was like an electric jolt to my senses. I was so wound up by the time we parked that I jerked open my door and climbed out just to take a deep breath that wasn’t filled with Addy.
Clearing my head was the most important thing right now. I was getting to know my daughter and building a friendship with her mother. Not getting a fucking hard-on every time I thought about Addy’s soft skin was the most important thing right now.
Jesus, I was fucked.
I took one more breath of Addy-free air before walking around the front of the truck to open Franny’s door and help her down. Addy opened her own door and climbed out. I’d wanted to help her, too, but she hadn’t waited, so I let it go. She wanted to define this thing with us, and I had to let her.
I was caving fast. My good intentions were hard to hold on to when she smelled like heaven, looked like an angel, and was wearing a fucking red sundress. Damn dress was making it hard to keep my attention off her.
“What place is this?” Franny asked.
“It’s the best burger place around, and it’s on the water. I thought I’d take us out of Rosemary Beach for a change. This is Grayton Beach. You’ll like it. There’s live music outside on the water if you want to listen after we eat.”
She smiled brightly and nodded. I was beginning to think she’d be happy to do whatever I suggested. That was a humbling realization. This little girl had just met me, and she already wanted to be near me, to talk to me, to have me in her life. This should have been harder, but with Franny, nothing was hard.
Now, with her mother . . . I shook that thought off. I wasn’t thinking about Addy right now. I’d do that at home alone tonight.
“I can play the guitar,” Franny announced, watching me closely. “Mommy taught me. But she plays better.”
Unable not to look at Addy, who was walking quietly behind us, I let myself get lost for a moment, in a time when we were us, when she would only play for me. I remembered when I’d traded my baseball card collection that my dad had given me, which his dad had given him, for a used guitar at a pawn shop. Addy never knew how I got that guitar, and I never told her, but she’d loved it. We had kept it hidden under her bed, and she had only played it down by the pond or whenever my mother wasn’t home. When she’d left—when I thought she was gone—I’d gotten the guitar from under her bed. It was in a box, stored safely in my boathouse. I hadn’t taken it out in years.
Tonight I would. Holding it wouldn’t cause unbearable pain now. When the time was right, I’d give it back to its rightful owner.
Addy shifted her gaze to meet mine, and a smile touched her lips. “She’s a natural,” she said.
I made myself look away from her. “I bet she is. Her mother is incredibly talented,” I said, looking straight ahead so neither of the girls could see my eyes; they’d say more than needed to be said.
“Did Mommy play for you when you loved her?” Franny asked innocently.
When you loved her. Those four words were too much. I just nodded.
“She used to play for me at night and sing me songs until I fell asleep. Then she taught me to play,” Franny continued.
Another thing Addy had given our daughter.
When he lifted his gaze, it locked on me, and I wished my heart didn’t beat a little faster. This was not what we needed. It was not what he wanted. It was a big mistake for me to be attracted to him. It was an even bigger mistake to feel things for him. He could destroy me.
“Like mother, like daughter,” he said with a slow grin. “Ain’t every day a man gets to take out two of the prettiest girls in town.”
Franny giggled and turned to look back at me. I managed to get hold of myself and smile back. I walked over to the sideboard, where I had left my purse. With my back turned, I took a deep breath and gave myself a small pep talk in my head.
“All right, lucky man, let’s go.” I tried to sound teasing, but I was afraid my voice wavered a little.
Captain held out his hand to Franny, who instantly stuck her small hand in his and led him out the door. I wanted to stop walking and just watch them go. He was so big and masculine, and at times he seemed dangerous. But seeing him with Franny’s little hand in his, her head tilted up, chatting away, was breathtaking.
I touched my stomach and ordered my ovaries to calm down before they combusted. Get over it, Addy.
Franny climbed into the front of Captain’s truck and tried to scoot over so I could fit, too. But I needed the space to get myself together again. I opted to get into the back of his extended cab. Franny buckled up happily and began to tell Captain about every moment of her day.
I listened to him respond when he needed to, and it was obvious he was enjoying himself. I couldn’t imagine him leaving Rosemary Beach. Not when he wanted this relationship. For Franny’s sake, this was another conversation I’d have to have with him.
Deep down, I knew that I didn’t want him to leave for selfish reasons as well. Although Addy came first in all things, for the first time since I’d held her in my arms, I wanted something for me, too. Something I could never have, so I had to deal with it, and fast. Franny’s happiness came first.
Captain
I couldn’t get out of my truck fast enough. Chatting with Franny was incredible. She wanted to tell me everything, and I loved it. But God help me, Addy smelled so damn good my hands were sweating. Her scent had engulfed my truck, and every small move she made was like an electric jolt to my senses. I was so wound up by the time we parked that I jerked open my door and climbed out just to take a deep breath that wasn’t filled with Addy.
Clearing my head was the most important thing right now. I was getting to know my daughter and building a friendship with her mother. Not getting a fucking hard-on every time I thought about Addy’s soft skin was the most important thing right now.
Jesus, I was fucked.
I took one more breath of Addy-free air before walking around the front of the truck to open Franny’s door and help her down. Addy opened her own door and climbed out. I’d wanted to help her, too, but she hadn’t waited, so I let it go. She wanted to define this thing with us, and I had to let her.
I was caving fast. My good intentions were hard to hold on to when she smelled like heaven, looked like an angel, and was wearing a fucking red sundress. Damn dress was making it hard to keep my attention off her.
“What place is this?” Franny asked.
“It’s the best burger place around, and it’s on the water. I thought I’d take us out of Rosemary Beach for a change. This is Grayton Beach. You’ll like it. There’s live music outside on the water if you want to listen after we eat.”
She smiled brightly and nodded. I was beginning to think she’d be happy to do whatever I suggested. That was a humbling realization. This little girl had just met me, and she already wanted to be near me, to talk to me, to have me in her life. This should have been harder, but with Franny, nothing was hard.
Now, with her mother . . . I shook that thought off. I wasn’t thinking about Addy right now. I’d do that at home alone tonight.
“I can play the guitar,” Franny announced, watching me closely. “Mommy taught me. But she plays better.”
Unable not to look at Addy, who was walking quietly behind us, I let myself get lost for a moment, in a time when we were us, when she would only play for me. I remembered when I’d traded my baseball card collection that my dad had given me, which his dad had given him, for a used guitar at a pawn shop. Addy never knew how I got that guitar, and I never told her, but she’d loved it. We had kept it hidden under her bed, and she had only played it down by the pond or whenever my mother wasn’t home. When she’d left—when I thought she was gone—I’d gotten the guitar from under her bed. It was in a box, stored safely in my boathouse. I hadn’t taken it out in years.
Tonight I would. Holding it wouldn’t cause unbearable pain now. When the time was right, I’d give it back to its rightful owner.
Addy shifted her gaze to meet mine, and a smile touched her lips. “She’s a natural,” she said.
I made myself look away from her. “I bet she is. Her mother is incredibly talented,” I said, looking straight ahead so neither of the girls could see my eyes; they’d say more than needed to be said.
“Did Mommy play for you when you loved her?” Franny asked innocently.
When you loved her. Those four words were too much. I just nodded.
“She used to play for me at night and sing me songs until I fell asleep. Then she taught me to play,” Franny continued.
Another thing Addy had given our daughter.
