The Distance Between Us
Page 30
“I love you, too,” he says. He puts his cheek against mine. “So much.”
Chapter 41
He pulls away first even though I have grabbed a handful of the back of his shirt and clutch it tight. “How is your mom? Is she pregnant, then?”
“No.”
“That’s good . . . right?”
“No. I was selfish. A baby would’ve been good news. This is awful. They’re trying to figure out what’s wrong.”
He tucks a piece of hair behind my ear and wipes a tear from my cheek with his thumb. He tries again to back up but I have grabbed another fistful of his shirt. He chuckles and gives up, wrapping his arms back around me. “We’ll figure it out. My father knows some of the best doctors in the world and—”
That’s when I let go and take one step back. “No. You’re not here to solve this problem. The last thing I need is for your parents to think I started dating you because my mom is sick and I wanted your help. Sean and Vivian have things under control and everything is going to be fine,” I say even though I’m not sure I believe it.
“What can I do, then? Do your grandparents have a place to stay? Because I’m kind of in the business of putting people up for a night or two . . .”
I smile.
“Are you guys hungry? When’s the last time you ate? Maybe I can get some food for everyone?”
I grab his hand. “Xander.”
“What?”
“Please don’t leave. When the doctor comes out . . . will you just . . . be here for me?”
“Of course.” He squeezes my hand and we walk back inside together.
Sean raises one eyebrow when he sees us, probably thinking, Didn’t we all agree that this boy is too pretty?
“Has the doctor come down yet?” I ask.
“No.”
“This is Xander, by the way,” I say, raising his hand slightly in mine. “These are the Meyerses . . . but I guess you all already met at the benefit.”
Sean’s stare goes between Xander and me, and it seems as though he’s keeping himself from giving some sort of grandfatherly admonition. I wonder if that’s hard for him, to keep an opinion to himself. Maybe he’s learned a thing or two about teenagers in the last twenty years. He obviously didn’t have a clue when my mom lived with him.
Finally Vivian says, “Xander, we just met her so take good care of her.”
“Of course, ma’am.”
“Caymen,” my grandfather says, taking Vivian’s hand in his, “I’m going to feed this lady. Did you need anything?”
“No, I’m good.” I find a chair in the corner and Xander sits next to me. A television hanging in the corner broadcasts the news too quietly for any of us to hear.
Sean and Vivian walk out together. I watch them. How is it possible that one day it’s just me and my mom and the next day I have three people who care so much about me?
A fear jolts through me. Is this God setting me up, making sure I won’t be left alone when something happens to my mother? I look at the ceiling. I still want my mom, I say in my head. Please don’t take her from me.
“Caymen?” Xander grabs my hand. “You okay?”
“I’m just scared.”
“I know. Me, too.” He stretches his legs out in front of him and leans his head back against the wall. Then he brings my hand to his lips and rests it there.
I lay my head on his shoulder. “Okay, so detective is out, although I must say that you’re much better at observation than I am.”
“Only forced observation.”
I run my finger along a vein in his forearm. “And no for the music producing? Henry would love you forever.”
He smiles. “It would be fun, but it takes money to produce music. For what my completely amateur opinion on music is worth, I think Crusty Toads are really good. They’ll do fine. . . . Can we talk to them about the logo, though? Who designed that thing?”
“Seriously. It’s bad. But maybe so bad that it’s good?”
He scrunches his lips together. “I don’t know.”
“Okay, so no music producing. That leads us back to this food thing. You love it.”
“I do.”
“Will you be mad if I say something?”
“Why would I be mad?”
“Because you might not want to hear it.”
He sighs. “Okay. Tell me.”
“I think your dad might be right about you. I think you are a multitalented person. And someone who can deal with many problems at once. Plus you have this quiet charm. Maybe the hotel is your future. It fits you well.” I hold my breath, waiting for him to get defensive, to tell me I don’t know him as well as he knows me.
His shoulders rise then fall. “You’re right, I didn’t want to hear that.”
“I’m sorry.”
“But you may be right. I think more about the hotel than a person who doesn’t care about it should.”
“Caymen.”
My head whips toward the new voice in the room, and I’m immediately on my feet when I see it’s the doctor. “Yes? How is she?”
“Things went well. The problem is what I thought it might be. She has bleeding ulcers in her stomach.”
“What does that mean? That sounds serious.”
“It is. And it’s a good thing we caught it. It’s a treatable condition but one that is going to take time to recover from. Time in a stress-free environment.”
“Definitely.” Maybe time away from the doll store. I take a breath. “Can I see her?”
“Yes. She was asking for you when she came to.”
The doctor turns and I start to follow. When Xander doesn’t follow I look back.
“I’ll wait here,” he says. “I’ll fill in your grandparents when they come back.”
“No. Please come with me. My mom will want to see you.” I had told her what had happened between Xander and me at the benefit, and my mom seemed sadder than a person who didn’t like Xander should’ve. At the time there was nothing I could say to comfort her, but now that we’re together, hopefully that will make her happy.
“Caymen, I’ll be fine.”
I walk back, grab his hand, and drag him with me. “This isn’t about you.”
He laughs.
I step into the room alone, leaving Xander to wait in the hall. My mom reaches her hand out to me and I sit by her bedside.
“So I guess I’m a ball of stress.”
“Not you, just your stomach.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I wish you would’ve confided in me more. Let me help out more.”
She gives a halfhearted laugh. “More? Caymen, you did more than I had the right to ask for.”
I stare at the IV needle in her arm. It’s surrounded by purple bruising.
“The store is . . .”
“In big trouble? Yeah, I know.”
“I’m working on alternative options. Maybe an online store is the way to go. But, Caymen, this is my responsibility. Not yours. I thought I’d leave it to you at one point, but it’s not your passion, is it?”
I laugh then put my forehead on the bed beside her. “I only tried so hard because I knew how important it was to you.”
She pats my head. “You are an amazing daughter. You do a lot of things just for me, don’t you?”
“That’s what family does.”
“Caymen, if you want to meet him you have every right to.”
My eyes snap to hers. “What? Who?”
“Your father. It’s up to you. You won’t hurt me.”
I nod. I’m still not sure what I want with my dad, but it feels good to have the choice.
“So if the doll store isn’t your dream, what is?”
“College. Science major.”
“Perfect.”
“Xander’s here. In the hall.”
“I knew he’d be back. How could someone stay away from you for long? Bring him in. I have an apology to make.”
I smile. The firm grip my mother has on my hand helps me remember how strong she is. I squeeze back then step out into the hall.
“Is she okay?”
I hug Xander, nuzzling my face into his neck. “How can I feel so perfectly happy when my mom is in the hospital and the doll store is in trouble?”
“Because you know everything is going to be okay. This is like the calm after the storm. Everything has settled, and even though it left destruction in its wake, you know the worst is over.”
“Nice analogy.”
“Thanks.”
“You ready for your after-the-storm talk with my mom?”
“For some reason I’m not as confident as I was the first time I met her.”
“You’ll do fine. All moms like you, remember?”
He bends his knees, wraps his arms around my waist, and stands up, lifting me off the floor, my toes brushing the tile. “As long as her daughter loves me I can face anything.”
“Even redrum? Because after this we’re going to your house to watch The Shining.”
“Now that my future is hotels, is that really a good idea?” I can feel his smile against my cheek.
“Don’t worry, you can cover your eyes. I won’t make fun of you . . . too much.”
Chapter 41
He pulls away first even though I have grabbed a handful of the back of his shirt and clutch it tight. “How is your mom? Is she pregnant, then?”
“No.”
“That’s good . . . right?”
“No. I was selfish. A baby would’ve been good news. This is awful. They’re trying to figure out what’s wrong.”
He tucks a piece of hair behind my ear and wipes a tear from my cheek with his thumb. He tries again to back up but I have grabbed another fistful of his shirt. He chuckles and gives up, wrapping his arms back around me. “We’ll figure it out. My father knows some of the best doctors in the world and—”
That’s when I let go and take one step back. “No. You’re not here to solve this problem. The last thing I need is for your parents to think I started dating you because my mom is sick and I wanted your help. Sean and Vivian have things under control and everything is going to be fine,” I say even though I’m not sure I believe it.
“What can I do, then? Do your grandparents have a place to stay? Because I’m kind of in the business of putting people up for a night or two . . .”
I smile.
“Are you guys hungry? When’s the last time you ate? Maybe I can get some food for everyone?”
I grab his hand. “Xander.”
“What?”
“Please don’t leave. When the doctor comes out . . . will you just . . . be here for me?”
“Of course.” He squeezes my hand and we walk back inside together.
Sean raises one eyebrow when he sees us, probably thinking, Didn’t we all agree that this boy is too pretty?
“Has the doctor come down yet?” I ask.
“No.”
“This is Xander, by the way,” I say, raising his hand slightly in mine. “These are the Meyerses . . . but I guess you all already met at the benefit.”
Sean’s stare goes between Xander and me, and it seems as though he’s keeping himself from giving some sort of grandfatherly admonition. I wonder if that’s hard for him, to keep an opinion to himself. Maybe he’s learned a thing or two about teenagers in the last twenty years. He obviously didn’t have a clue when my mom lived with him.
Finally Vivian says, “Xander, we just met her so take good care of her.”
“Of course, ma’am.”
“Caymen,” my grandfather says, taking Vivian’s hand in his, “I’m going to feed this lady. Did you need anything?”
“No, I’m good.” I find a chair in the corner and Xander sits next to me. A television hanging in the corner broadcasts the news too quietly for any of us to hear.
Sean and Vivian walk out together. I watch them. How is it possible that one day it’s just me and my mom and the next day I have three people who care so much about me?
A fear jolts through me. Is this God setting me up, making sure I won’t be left alone when something happens to my mother? I look at the ceiling. I still want my mom, I say in my head. Please don’t take her from me.
“Caymen?” Xander grabs my hand. “You okay?”
“I’m just scared.”
“I know. Me, too.” He stretches his legs out in front of him and leans his head back against the wall. Then he brings my hand to his lips and rests it there.
I lay my head on his shoulder. “Okay, so detective is out, although I must say that you’re much better at observation than I am.”
“Only forced observation.”
I run my finger along a vein in his forearm. “And no for the music producing? Henry would love you forever.”
He smiles. “It would be fun, but it takes money to produce music. For what my completely amateur opinion on music is worth, I think Crusty Toads are really good. They’ll do fine. . . . Can we talk to them about the logo, though? Who designed that thing?”
“Seriously. It’s bad. But maybe so bad that it’s good?”
He scrunches his lips together. “I don’t know.”
“Okay, so no music producing. That leads us back to this food thing. You love it.”
“I do.”
“Will you be mad if I say something?”
“Why would I be mad?”
“Because you might not want to hear it.”
He sighs. “Okay. Tell me.”
“I think your dad might be right about you. I think you are a multitalented person. And someone who can deal with many problems at once. Plus you have this quiet charm. Maybe the hotel is your future. It fits you well.” I hold my breath, waiting for him to get defensive, to tell me I don’t know him as well as he knows me.
His shoulders rise then fall. “You’re right, I didn’t want to hear that.”
“I’m sorry.”
“But you may be right. I think more about the hotel than a person who doesn’t care about it should.”
“Caymen.”
My head whips toward the new voice in the room, and I’m immediately on my feet when I see it’s the doctor. “Yes? How is she?”
“Things went well. The problem is what I thought it might be. She has bleeding ulcers in her stomach.”
“What does that mean? That sounds serious.”
“It is. And it’s a good thing we caught it. It’s a treatable condition but one that is going to take time to recover from. Time in a stress-free environment.”
“Definitely.” Maybe time away from the doll store. I take a breath. “Can I see her?”
“Yes. She was asking for you when she came to.”
The doctor turns and I start to follow. When Xander doesn’t follow I look back.
“I’ll wait here,” he says. “I’ll fill in your grandparents when they come back.”
“No. Please come with me. My mom will want to see you.” I had told her what had happened between Xander and me at the benefit, and my mom seemed sadder than a person who didn’t like Xander should’ve. At the time there was nothing I could say to comfort her, but now that we’re together, hopefully that will make her happy.
“Caymen, I’ll be fine.”
I walk back, grab his hand, and drag him with me. “This isn’t about you.”
He laughs.
I step into the room alone, leaving Xander to wait in the hall. My mom reaches her hand out to me and I sit by her bedside.
“So I guess I’m a ball of stress.”
“Not you, just your stomach.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I wish you would’ve confided in me more. Let me help out more.”
She gives a halfhearted laugh. “More? Caymen, you did more than I had the right to ask for.”
I stare at the IV needle in her arm. It’s surrounded by purple bruising.
“The store is . . .”
“In big trouble? Yeah, I know.”
“I’m working on alternative options. Maybe an online store is the way to go. But, Caymen, this is my responsibility. Not yours. I thought I’d leave it to you at one point, but it’s not your passion, is it?”
I laugh then put my forehead on the bed beside her. “I only tried so hard because I knew how important it was to you.”
She pats my head. “You are an amazing daughter. You do a lot of things just for me, don’t you?”
“That’s what family does.”
“Caymen, if you want to meet him you have every right to.”
My eyes snap to hers. “What? Who?”
“Your father. It’s up to you. You won’t hurt me.”
I nod. I’m still not sure what I want with my dad, but it feels good to have the choice.
“So if the doll store isn’t your dream, what is?”
“College. Science major.”
“Perfect.”
“Xander’s here. In the hall.”
“I knew he’d be back. How could someone stay away from you for long? Bring him in. I have an apology to make.”
I smile. The firm grip my mother has on my hand helps me remember how strong she is. I squeeze back then step out into the hall.
“Is she okay?”
I hug Xander, nuzzling my face into his neck. “How can I feel so perfectly happy when my mom is in the hospital and the doll store is in trouble?”
“Because you know everything is going to be okay. This is like the calm after the storm. Everything has settled, and even though it left destruction in its wake, you know the worst is over.”
“Nice analogy.”
“Thanks.”
“You ready for your after-the-storm talk with my mom?”
“For some reason I’m not as confident as I was the first time I met her.”
“You’ll do fine. All moms like you, remember?”
He bends his knees, wraps his arms around my waist, and stands up, lifting me off the floor, my toes brushing the tile. “As long as her daughter loves me I can face anything.”
“Even redrum? Because after this we’re going to your house to watch The Shining.”
“Now that my future is hotels, is that really a good idea?” I can feel his smile against my cheek.
“Don’t worry, you can cover your eyes. I won’t make fun of you . . . too much.”
