The Fire Between High & Lo
Page 21
“You’re okay, Alyssa Marie Walters,” he sighed against my skin.
I cried more, pulling him closer. “I’m okay, Logan Francis Silverstone.”
Chapter Ten
Alyssa
When it rained, it poured.
My mom always said those words whenever she was in the middle of a court case, and bad news came rolling in. When one bad thing happened, something worse wasn’t that far behind. I never truly believed in that saying, because I was the optimist of the family, the glass-half-full girl. But lately, it seemed true. It was only a week ago since Dad broke up with me, and I hadn’t had time to process that event before the world came crashing down on me once again. I could hear Mom’s words playing on repeat in my head.
“When it rains, it pours, Alyssa. That’s just the truth about the world.”
“So,” Erika sighed, standing beside me in a grocery store aisle. “How many should we get?”
It’d been two weeks since I’d been throwing up each day. What I thought was created from nerves was now a bigger fear as we stood in front of the pregnancy tests. I didn’t know who else to call other than my sister, and when she heard the tremble in my voice, she was parked right outside of the house forty-five minutes later. Even though Erika was realistic and driven like our mom, she wasn’t so heartless. She loved me for my creative ways, and quirky personality, and I knew she’d do anything to help me.
“Maybe two?” I whispered, my body shaky.
She placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. “We’ll do five. Just in case.” We walked up to the cashier, and they looked at us as if we were crazy for having so many tests. She grabbed a jug of water, too. As I was about to run out of the store humiliated, feeling the judgment coming through the cashier’s eyes, Erika huffed. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you that it’s rude to stare?”
They rang up our items, not looking at us once.
My phone dinged as we were walking out of the store.
Logan: Where are you? I need to see you.
I couldn’t answer. My phone dinged from him four more times before we got home. I shut off my phone.
We sat in my bathroom with the door locked. Mom wasn’t home yet, and all five pregnancy tests were unwrapped, sitting on the sink, waiting for me to pee on each one. I’d drank a whole jug of water, and as I started to feel the urge to use it, Erika made sure to coach me through it.
“You have to pee a little on a stick, then hold it, then another stick, then hold, then another—”
“I get it,” I sassed, annoyed. Not at her, but at myself for being in the current situation. I was supposed to be off to college next weekend, not peeing on five sticks.
Once the deed was done, we waited ten minutes. The packs said they’d only take two minutes, but I felt as if ten minutes would’ve been more accurate.
“What does a pink line mean on this one?” I asked, picking up the first stick.
“Pregnant,” Erika whispered.
I picked up the second. “And a plus sign?”
“Pregnant.”
My stomach tightened. “And two pink lines?”
She frowned.
Vomit rose to my throat. “And another plus sign?”
“Alyssa…” her voice shook.
“And this one that says pregnant? What does that mean?” Tears were falling down my cheeks, and I wasn’t certain how to make them stop. My breaths sawed in and out, my heartbeats became erratic. I didn’t know what to think about first. Logan? College? Mom? My tears?
“Aly, it’s okay. We’ll figure this out. Don’t panic.” Erika’s hand on my leg was the only thing keeping me from falling to the ground and rocking back and forth in a corner.
“I start college next weekend.”
“And you still will. We just need to figure out—”
“Alyssa!” Mom hollered, walking into the house. “What did I tell you about leaving your shoes in the foyer! Come get these now!”
My hands started shaking uncontrollably as Erika helped me stand up, swiping all of the pregnancy tests into a bag before she shoved them into her oversized purse. “Come on,” she said, washing her hands, forcing me to wash my hands, and then nudging her head toward the door. “Let’s go.”
“No,” I whisper-shouted. “I can’t, I can’t see her right now. I can’t go out there.”
“You can’t just hide in here,” she said, wiping my eyes. “Don’t worry. We won’t say anything to her. Just breathe.”
She walked out of the bathroom first, and I followed behind her.
“Erika? What are you doing here?” Mom asked, with a heightened voice.
“I just thought I’d stop by to visit. Maybe have dinner with you both.”
“It’s rude to just show up for dinner without calling. What if I didn’t get enough food for you? Besides, I was ordering in tonight. Alyssa has to finish packing all of her boxes in her room, even though I told her she should’ve had it done last weekend. And—”
“I’m pregnant.”
Mom’s eyes shot up to me as Erika’s jaw shot to the ground. “What did you just say?”
The moment I said the word once more, the yelling began. She told me what a disappointment I’d become. She screamed her disgust toward me. She said she knew I’d screw up somehow, and called Logan a deadbeat.
“You’ll have an abortion,” she said matter-of-factly. “That’s all there is to it. We’ll go to a clinic this week, handle this mishap, and then you’ll leave for college.”
My mind hadn’t even wrapped around the fact that I was pregnant, yet she was already telling me to make it disappear.
“Mom, come on. Let’s not be so irrational,” Erika said, standing up for me, because words weren’t able to escape my closed up throat.
“Irrational?” Mom folded her arms across her chest. She raised an eyebrow with a glassy stare. “No, what’s irrational is getting pregnant five days before starting college. What’s irrational is dating a loser with no life plans. What’s irrational is Alyssa having a child when she hasn’t even grown up herself.”
“He’s not a loser,” I swore about Logan. He was so far from being a loser.
Mom rolled her eyes, and started off toward her office. “I have a case tomorrow, but then we are going to the clinic. Otherwise, you can figure out a way to pay for college yourself. I will not put my money into you going to a school for a fake major, when you’ll end up dropping out and becoming nothing,” she ordered. “You’re just like your father.”
I cried more, pulling him closer. “I’m okay, Logan Francis Silverstone.”
Chapter Ten
Alyssa
When it rained, it poured.
My mom always said those words whenever she was in the middle of a court case, and bad news came rolling in. When one bad thing happened, something worse wasn’t that far behind. I never truly believed in that saying, because I was the optimist of the family, the glass-half-full girl. But lately, it seemed true. It was only a week ago since Dad broke up with me, and I hadn’t had time to process that event before the world came crashing down on me once again. I could hear Mom’s words playing on repeat in my head.
“When it rains, it pours, Alyssa. That’s just the truth about the world.”
“So,” Erika sighed, standing beside me in a grocery store aisle. “How many should we get?”
It’d been two weeks since I’d been throwing up each day. What I thought was created from nerves was now a bigger fear as we stood in front of the pregnancy tests. I didn’t know who else to call other than my sister, and when she heard the tremble in my voice, she was parked right outside of the house forty-five minutes later. Even though Erika was realistic and driven like our mom, she wasn’t so heartless. She loved me for my creative ways, and quirky personality, and I knew she’d do anything to help me.
“Maybe two?” I whispered, my body shaky.
She placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. “We’ll do five. Just in case.” We walked up to the cashier, and they looked at us as if we were crazy for having so many tests. She grabbed a jug of water, too. As I was about to run out of the store humiliated, feeling the judgment coming through the cashier’s eyes, Erika huffed. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you that it’s rude to stare?”
They rang up our items, not looking at us once.
My phone dinged as we were walking out of the store.
Logan: Where are you? I need to see you.
I couldn’t answer. My phone dinged from him four more times before we got home. I shut off my phone.
We sat in my bathroom with the door locked. Mom wasn’t home yet, and all five pregnancy tests were unwrapped, sitting on the sink, waiting for me to pee on each one. I’d drank a whole jug of water, and as I started to feel the urge to use it, Erika made sure to coach me through it.
“You have to pee a little on a stick, then hold it, then another stick, then hold, then another—”
“I get it,” I sassed, annoyed. Not at her, but at myself for being in the current situation. I was supposed to be off to college next weekend, not peeing on five sticks.
Once the deed was done, we waited ten minutes. The packs said they’d only take two minutes, but I felt as if ten minutes would’ve been more accurate.
“What does a pink line mean on this one?” I asked, picking up the first stick.
“Pregnant,” Erika whispered.
I picked up the second. “And a plus sign?”
“Pregnant.”
My stomach tightened. “And two pink lines?”
She frowned.
Vomit rose to my throat. “And another plus sign?”
“Alyssa…” her voice shook.
“And this one that says pregnant? What does that mean?” Tears were falling down my cheeks, and I wasn’t certain how to make them stop. My breaths sawed in and out, my heartbeats became erratic. I didn’t know what to think about first. Logan? College? Mom? My tears?
“Aly, it’s okay. We’ll figure this out. Don’t panic.” Erika’s hand on my leg was the only thing keeping me from falling to the ground and rocking back and forth in a corner.
“I start college next weekend.”
“And you still will. We just need to figure out—”
“Alyssa!” Mom hollered, walking into the house. “What did I tell you about leaving your shoes in the foyer! Come get these now!”
My hands started shaking uncontrollably as Erika helped me stand up, swiping all of the pregnancy tests into a bag before she shoved them into her oversized purse. “Come on,” she said, washing her hands, forcing me to wash my hands, and then nudging her head toward the door. “Let’s go.”
“No,” I whisper-shouted. “I can’t, I can’t see her right now. I can’t go out there.”
“You can’t just hide in here,” she said, wiping my eyes. “Don’t worry. We won’t say anything to her. Just breathe.”
She walked out of the bathroom first, and I followed behind her.
“Erika? What are you doing here?” Mom asked, with a heightened voice.
“I just thought I’d stop by to visit. Maybe have dinner with you both.”
“It’s rude to just show up for dinner without calling. What if I didn’t get enough food for you? Besides, I was ordering in tonight. Alyssa has to finish packing all of her boxes in her room, even though I told her she should’ve had it done last weekend. And—”
“I’m pregnant.”
Mom’s eyes shot up to me as Erika’s jaw shot to the ground. “What did you just say?”
The moment I said the word once more, the yelling began. She told me what a disappointment I’d become. She screamed her disgust toward me. She said she knew I’d screw up somehow, and called Logan a deadbeat.
“You’ll have an abortion,” she said matter-of-factly. “That’s all there is to it. We’ll go to a clinic this week, handle this mishap, and then you’ll leave for college.”
My mind hadn’t even wrapped around the fact that I was pregnant, yet she was already telling me to make it disappear.
“Mom, come on. Let’s not be so irrational,” Erika said, standing up for me, because words weren’t able to escape my closed up throat.
“Irrational?” Mom folded her arms across her chest. She raised an eyebrow with a glassy stare. “No, what’s irrational is getting pregnant five days before starting college. What’s irrational is dating a loser with no life plans. What’s irrational is Alyssa having a child when she hasn’t even grown up herself.”
“He’s not a loser,” I swore about Logan. He was so far from being a loser.
Mom rolled her eyes, and started off toward her office. “I have a case tomorrow, but then we are going to the clinic. Otherwise, you can figure out a way to pay for college yourself. I will not put my money into you going to a school for a fake major, when you’ll end up dropping out and becoming nothing,” she ordered. “You’re just like your father.”
