The Heart's Ashes
Page 111
“He just realised what we were doing—when I bit you.”
“Oh.” I looked at the door. “Is he mad?”
He poorly held back the laughter etching on his lips. “Yeah. Pretty mad.”
“Oh no.” I rolled my face into my hand.
“Ara. I’m sorry. I lost control—” He shook his head, staring at my face.
“I know. I felt it when you did.” I liked it. “I’m not mad that you bit me, David. It was silly of us to risk it—with you being hungry and all.”
“I should be able to control it. I’m not some kind of animal.”
“If it’s any consolation at all, I loved every second of it.”
His teeth showed with a smile, tipped with thin lines of red. “Me too.”
“Can you believe we finally did it?”
“It didn’t hurt too much, did it? The er, when I first—”
I shook my head. “After I relaxed, it was fine.”
He reached across the small space between us and touched my chin. “You were so beautiful. I mean, you are so beautiful, all the time—but, when you let yourself go and be free, feel the desire, the lust—you look amazing. You make me feel so alive.”
“Well, any time.” My cheeks flushed with heat. David laid back, pulling me onto his chest. “David?”
“Yes, my love?”
“What’s it like? To make love to a girl vampire—why is it different?”
His fingers traced circles over my bare skin, all the way down my spine. “Well, they don’t have a heartbeat for starters. They’re not timid and shy, and, inside, they don’t move like you do either; they’re kind of just tight. You—you’re all of that, but more alive.”
“But you said vampires aren’t dead.”
“We’re not. But I mean alive descriptively. Buzzing, sort of.”
“Right.” I nodded. “So, you liked it—I was enough for you?”
“Oh, God, sweetheart, yes. For eternity, you’re everything I want.”
“But, what about when I’m Lilithian?”
David laughed aloud; his eyes became distant behind his smile. “Lilithians are a very different class of vampires.”
“Really?”
“Yes, trust me, making love to a Lilithian is nothing like with a vampire,” he scoffed, with a grin.
“So, you speak from experience?” I looked down at my diamond ring.
“Ara.” David tilted my chin upward and smiled softly. “I’ve been alive for over a hundred and twenty years, I have had other girls.”
“I know.” I pulled away and rested my face on his smooth, warm chest. “I just don’t like to think about it.”
“Then don’t, sweetheart.” David kissed the top of my head and smoothed his fingers along my hairline. “It’s only ever going to be you now.”
And for me, I’ve only ever had him. “Is—is Mike going to be okay?”
“I actually don’t know, Ara,” David said with a breath. “I wish I did, but he shouldn’t be feeling what he’s feeling. Not now he has Em. I’m worried.”
“Why?”
“He and Em have...you know...they’ve had sex since she became a vampire. Being Marked should change a few things.”
“Really? But he wouldn’t be bound to her, because he wasn’t a virgin.”
“No, but even then, he should be more focused on her than he is.”
I pointed to my neck; “Is mine there yet, my Mark?”
David leaned over as I rolled onto my back, and gently swept my hair to one side. “Your hair is getting so long now.”
“I know. Do you think I should cut it?”
“God, no. Don’t do that. It’s beautiful.” He smiled warmly and studied my skin, running his finger over the curve of my shoulder. “Hm.”
“What’s hm?” I frowned at his frown.
When his eyes narrowed and he laid back with a blank expression, I jumped up and ran to the mirror.
“Ara. Don’t. Please? Just come back to bed.”
“No!” I gasped, touching my neck.
“Maybe it’s too early. Maybe it’ll show up tomorrow,” David said. “I’ve never Marked someone before.”
I backed away from the mirror and studied my naked body, tears welling in my eyes as I forced my mind to see images of Mike, images I shouldn’t be able to see with a spirit bind in place.
“David,” I said, covering my mouth when my voice came out broken. “The bind didn’t work.”
He slid his warm arms along my waist, his soft lips touching my shoulder. “I’m sure it will, my love. It’s probably just not what you expected.”
“No.” I shook my head and let my heart feel the burn of love for Mike—to really wallow in the desire to be in his arms as well.
David doubled back, growing taller as he stumbled backward to the foot of the bed. “The only way that’s possible is if—”
“If what, David?’
“If you’re not a virgin.”
“David! We’ve been through this.”
He rubbed his chin. “Are you sure that when my brother kidnapped you, he didn’t—”
“Yes!” I cringed. “I’m sure he didn’t. Besides, there’s no Mark there.” I pulled my hair away. “See? If he’d raped me I’d be Marked.”
“I know.” He breathed out. “And that wouldn’t explain how deeply you feel for Mike, either. Are you sure he’s not a vampire?”
I laughed.
“But, then, if that were the case and Mike had bound you to him, you would be incapable of loving me.” He scratched his chin, taking a breath. “You do still love me, don’t you?”
I walked slowly to where he leaned, naked, against the foot of the bed. “I just gave myself to you, and you ask if I love you?”
His lips curved before the smile showed in his eyes. “I guess that was a silly question.”
I pressed my naked body against his, feeling the silky warmth of him all the way down my ribs, my stomach and knees. “Maybe I didn’t Mark because I died when Jason bit me. Maybe I’m not human anymore—I might be an apparition.”
“Oh.” I looked at the door. “Is he mad?”
He poorly held back the laughter etching on his lips. “Yeah. Pretty mad.”
“Oh no.” I rolled my face into my hand.
“Ara. I’m sorry. I lost control—” He shook his head, staring at my face.
“I know. I felt it when you did.” I liked it. “I’m not mad that you bit me, David. It was silly of us to risk it—with you being hungry and all.”
“I should be able to control it. I’m not some kind of animal.”
“If it’s any consolation at all, I loved every second of it.”
His teeth showed with a smile, tipped with thin lines of red. “Me too.”
“Can you believe we finally did it?”
“It didn’t hurt too much, did it? The er, when I first—”
I shook my head. “After I relaxed, it was fine.”
He reached across the small space between us and touched my chin. “You were so beautiful. I mean, you are so beautiful, all the time—but, when you let yourself go and be free, feel the desire, the lust—you look amazing. You make me feel so alive.”
“Well, any time.” My cheeks flushed with heat. David laid back, pulling me onto his chest. “David?”
“Yes, my love?”
“What’s it like? To make love to a girl vampire—why is it different?”
His fingers traced circles over my bare skin, all the way down my spine. “Well, they don’t have a heartbeat for starters. They’re not timid and shy, and, inside, they don’t move like you do either; they’re kind of just tight. You—you’re all of that, but more alive.”
“But you said vampires aren’t dead.”
“We’re not. But I mean alive descriptively. Buzzing, sort of.”
“Right.” I nodded. “So, you liked it—I was enough for you?”
“Oh, God, sweetheart, yes. For eternity, you’re everything I want.”
“But, what about when I’m Lilithian?”
David laughed aloud; his eyes became distant behind his smile. “Lilithians are a very different class of vampires.”
“Really?”
“Yes, trust me, making love to a Lilithian is nothing like with a vampire,” he scoffed, with a grin.
“So, you speak from experience?” I looked down at my diamond ring.
“Ara.” David tilted my chin upward and smiled softly. “I’ve been alive for over a hundred and twenty years, I have had other girls.”
“I know.” I pulled away and rested my face on his smooth, warm chest. “I just don’t like to think about it.”
“Then don’t, sweetheart.” David kissed the top of my head and smoothed his fingers along my hairline. “It’s only ever going to be you now.”
And for me, I’ve only ever had him. “Is—is Mike going to be okay?”
“I actually don’t know, Ara,” David said with a breath. “I wish I did, but he shouldn’t be feeling what he’s feeling. Not now he has Em. I’m worried.”
“Why?”
“He and Em have...you know...they’ve had sex since she became a vampire. Being Marked should change a few things.”
“Really? But he wouldn’t be bound to her, because he wasn’t a virgin.”
“No, but even then, he should be more focused on her than he is.”
I pointed to my neck; “Is mine there yet, my Mark?”
David leaned over as I rolled onto my back, and gently swept my hair to one side. “Your hair is getting so long now.”
“I know. Do you think I should cut it?”
“God, no. Don’t do that. It’s beautiful.” He smiled warmly and studied my skin, running his finger over the curve of my shoulder. “Hm.”
“What’s hm?” I frowned at his frown.
When his eyes narrowed and he laid back with a blank expression, I jumped up and ran to the mirror.
“Ara. Don’t. Please? Just come back to bed.”
“No!” I gasped, touching my neck.
“Maybe it’s too early. Maybe it’ll show up tomorrow,” David said. “I’ve never Marked someone before.”
I backed away from the mirror and studied my naked body, tears welling in my eyes as I forced my mind to see images of Mike, images I shouldn’t be able to see with a spirit bind in place.
“David,” I said, covering my mouth when my voice came out broken. “The bind didn’t work.”
He slid his warm arms along my waist, his soft lips touching my shoulder. “I’m sure it will, my love. It’s probably just not what you expected.”
“No.” I shook my head and let my heart feel the burn of love for Mike—to really wallow in the desire to be in his arms as well.
David doubled back, growing taller as he stumbled backward to the foot of the bed. “The only way that’s possible is if—”
“If what, David?’
“If you’re not a virgin.”
“David! We’ve been through this.”
He rubbed his chin. “Are you sure that when my brother kidnapped you, he didn’t—”
“Yes!” I cringed. “I’m sure he didn’t. Besides, there’s no Mark there.” I pulled my hair away. “See? If he’d raped me I’d be Marked.”
“I know.” He breathed out. “And that wouldn’t explain how deeply you feel for Mike, either. Are you sure he’s not a vampire?”
I laughed.
“But, then, if that were the case and Mike had bound you to him, you would be incapable of loving me.” He scratched his chin, taking a breath. “You do still love me, don’t you?”
I walked slowly to where he leaned, naked, against the foot of the bed. “I just gave myself to you, and you ask if I love you?”
His lips curved before the smile showed in his eyes. “I guess that was a silly question.”
I pressed my naked body against his, feeling the silky warmth of him all the way down my ribs, my stomach and knees. “Maybe I didn’t Mark because I died when Jason bit me. Maybe I’m not human anymore—I might be an apparition.”
