The Other Side of Love
Page 14
“I don’t know what …” I paused as she looked at me with her big brown eyes full of love and concern for me. “Okay, it’s true.” I sighed. “Zane and I don’t have the same mom.”
Chapter 9
“You have to tell him,” Lucky’s tears dried up on the car ride over to the Johnsons’. “You can’t keep this inside. It’s not healthy for you and it’s not good for Zane, either. He needs to know the truth.”
“I don’t want to break his heart.” I shook my head. “You have to keep this a secret.”
“Noah.” She sighed. “I don’t know if I can keep this from him.”
“Let me do this in my own way.” I looked at her, with my eyes begging her for a reprieve. “Please.”
“He’s going to be at the Johnsons’.” She took a deep breath. “We have a surprise for you. I’m sorry.”
“Oh, no.” I looked at her in fear. “What did you do?”
“I’m sorry, Noah, but Zane went and picked Robin up. She will most probably be inside with the Johnsons as well.”
“What?” I shouted. “Why would you do that?”
“You’ve been so lonely this last week. I know you guys had an attraction and I convinced Zane that it was in your best interest to bring her over this afternoon. I’m sorry.”
“Fuck, I can’t believe you did that.” I clenched my fists. “I don’t need you interfering with my love life, Lucky.”
“I’m sorry.” She looked at me with huge eyes. “I made a mistake. I thought it would help. I didn’t realize, well, you know. I didn’t realize that you had so much going on.”
“I have nothing to say to Robin, Lucky. If I wanted to talk to her, I would have called her and asked her out on a date.”
“I don’t believe you.” She shook her head. “You’re scared, Noah. I don’t know what that girl did to you in Palm Bonita, but you don’t owe her anything. She missed out. You’re a good guy and you deserve better.”
“I don’t miss the girl I dated.” I sighed. “You have it all wrong. It’s a lot more complicated than you think.”
“Well, maybe if you didn’t keep everything to yourself I’d know why you’re still so hung up on Skylar, who frankly sounds like a bit of a bitch.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about, Lucky.” I shook my head and got out of the car. “You have absolutely no idea.”
“I’m sorry, Noah. I’m just trying to help.”
“You don’t understand, Lucky. You can’t help me. I’m not Zane, you can’t save me.” I shook my head and then lowered my voice as I saw the hurt expression on her face. “Look, I know you’re trying to help. But this is not something you can fix.” I grabbed her hand. “Maybe in another life, in another world.” I shrugged as I stared into her face. “Like I said before, Zane won the jackpot when he found you, Lucky. If he hadn’t found you first, I would have done my darndest to get you for myself.” I laughed at the shocked look on her face. “Don’t worry, I’m not trying to steal you away. I just want you to know that I appreciate you more than you know. But you can’t fix this, Lucky, and you can’t fix me.”
“I understand.” She squeezed my hand. “But there’s a girl in there who could be a part of that process. And I don’t want you to miss out on that because of your demons.”
“You’re not going to give up are you?” I shook my head exasperated.
“No, I’m not. Not with that and not about anything else. Tell Zane the truth, please, Noah.” She whispered up to me. “It won’t break him. I promise you. He deserves to know. He’s hurting more now then you’ll ever know.”
“You don’t know everything, Lucky.” I looked at her with a strained expression. “There’s more to the story.”
“Tell him, Noah.” She said firmly. “It’s not up to you to protect him.”
“He’s my brother. That’s my job.” I argued.
“No, Noah. Your job is to love him and to be honest with him. Always. No matter how hard or difficult it is. You need to be honest with him. You can’t shield him from the truth.” She took a deep breath. “Because the truth always has a habit of getting out. And you don’t want him to find out from someone else, do you?”
I shook my head and I realized that she was correct. There was no way that I was going to be able to keep this a secret from Zane forever. He would find out eventually, and if he found out from someone else, he would resent me forever. I knew Lucky was right. I had to tell him. Even if that meant breaking him down again. I hated to do it, but I knew that our relationship would never be without a strain if I didn’t come clean.
“Hey, you two.” Sidney opened the door and waved us in. “I wasn’t sure if you were going to make it in.”
“I was just talking to Noah. Sorry, Sidney.” She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “How are you?”
“Good. Your lovely fiancée and his friend are inside.” Sidney grinned and closed the door behind us. “Though, I think she may be more of Noah’s friend, yes?”
“You’re so astute, Sidney.” Lucky smiled at him and they walked arm-in-arm. I took a deep breath to steady the nerves that had suddenly hit me. I suddenly had nerves in my stomach and I realized that I was excited to see Robin.
“Hey, Noah.” Betty rushed over to me and gave me a hug. “I just can’t get over seeing you.”
“I missed you as well, Betty.”
“Boy, do you know how many tears I shed for you?” She shook her head and shuddered. “But all’s well that ends well.”
“Yes.” I smiled at her warmly and gave her cheek a big kiss. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise as I heard footsteps walk into the room. I turned around slowly and saw Robin standing there, looking at me shyly. “Hi.”
“Hi,” she responded back and gave me a quick smile.
“It’s good to see you.”
“You, too.” Her eyes searched mine, and before I knew what I was doing I had stepped towards her, brought her into my arms, and given her a kiss on the lips. “Why, hello to you, too,” she laughed, flushing a little.
“I hope that was okay.”
“It was more than okay.” She giggled and touched her lips quickly. “You taste like chocolate.”
“Good taste buds.” I smiled. “I had a hot chocolate before I got here. Lucky gave me one before we left the house to calm down my nerves.”
“That doesn’t sound too good.” She looked at me curiously.
“It’s not that good.” I sighed. “But I’m better now. How did your audition go?” I changed the subject and she shook her head and made a face.
“Let’s just say I’m not interested in dying my hair purple and getting 48DDD implants for a role.”
“You’re not?” I laughed, and turned around when I realized that everyone in the room was staring at us.
“Hey, bro.” Zane winked at me. “Maybe you can save the chat-up lines for tonight.”
“I’m not …” I glared at him. “What are you doing here anyway?”
“I came to see what’s going on with the documentary.” He shrugged. “Plus, I had a special delivery to make. You can thank me later.”
“Thanks, Santa Claus.” I rolled my eyes and then turned to Robin quickly. “Not that I’m saying you’re my present or anything. Trust me, I am not objectifying you.”
“Uh, thanks, I guess.” She laughed and made a face. “I know you most probably think I’m crazy and quick to ignite, but I’m really not like fireworks. You don’t have to be that careful around me.”
“I think I’d rather be more careful than not right now.” I smiled.
“Fair enough.”
“So would anyone like tea and cookies?” Betty picked up her teapot. “I just boiled some water, so it should still be hot.”
“Betty, get the kids some Cokes. Not everyone wants tea.” Sidney responded to her, and she glared at him.
“I’ll have some tea, thanks Betty.”
“Of course you would, Noah.” Sidney smiled at me. “Let’s all go sit down. I’ve got old bones, you know.”
“You’ve got old everything, Sidney Johnson.” Betty handed me a plate of cookies. “Let the children relax for a moment before you have them working.”
“It’s okay.” I grinned at her. “I’m pretty excited to talk about what I’ve been working on.” I followed Sidney to the couch and sat down. He leaned over to me and gave me a stern look. “You told your brother the truth yet?”
“No.” I shook my head. “Soon.”
“I still got them papers.” He sat back. “You let me know when you want them.”
“I’ll let you know,” I nodded.
“So who’s the girl?” Sidney continued and nodded towards Robin, who was standing next to Lucky and laughing at something. “She’s real pretty.”
“She’s just a friend.”
“Seems like more than a friend to me.” He looked down at his wedding ring. “I mean, I’ve only been married for a few hundred years. I don’t know much about love and them things.”
“Sidney.” I admonished him. “I don’t love her.” I hissed quietly to make sure no one else could hear us. “I barely know her. We barely went on one quasi-date.”
“She gets to you though.” He looked at me thoughtfully. “You get to her as well.”
“She’s fragile.” I sighed.
“Yes. I’m glad you see it. She has a hard exterior. But it’s a shell that’s easily broken. She’s got a story, that one. Be careful not to break her heart.”
“I would never do that,” I retorted, angry that he thought I was capable of such a thing.
“You need to finish your business off in Palm Bonita before you start dating anyone new.” He stared into my eyes seriously. “That’s some serious business you’re involved in, Noah. You got to be careful.”
“I am being careful.” I sighed. “Did you speak to your son?”
“Yes.” He nodded. “He’s a family attorney in Illinois, though. He said he’s not that familiar with the family court system in Florida.”
“But did he have any advice?” I looked at him bleakly. I had called Sidney earlier in the week and filled him in on the situation with Skylar because I had needed to talk to someone about it. I felt guilty for not telling Zane, but I just wasn’t ready to tell him about everything without going into what had happened with Mom.
“He said that you should just give it up. You’re never going to get her. She’s never going to be yours.” Sidney looked at me bleakly. “He said that it’s admirable how much you love her, but you can’t change the facts.”
“So he thinks I should just give up?” I was angry. “She was counting on me.”
“You aren’t God, Noah. You can’t make miracles happen.”
“I can try.”
“And that’s why I love you, son.” He nodded approvingly. “You don’t give up, no matter how difficult the odds. The world needs more men like you.”
“I haven’t done anything yet.”
“You have a pure heart.” He patted my back. “That’s enough.”
“I’m going to tell Zane.” I blurted out, changing the subject. “I think I’m going to tell him. He has a right to know.”
“That’s what I’ve been telling you.”
“He’s going to be devastated.” I closed my eyes.
“He’s still got a wonderful family.” Sidney’s eyes blazed. “We’re all still one big family.”
“I know.” I smiled at him gratefully. “You’re the granddad we never had.”
“Do you want me to be there when you tell him?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I need to do this alone.”
“Take him into my study.” Sidney nodded as if thinking. “The file you gave me is in my desk, second drawer from the right.”
“I don’t know if I should show him.” I paused. “I was just going to tell him about Mom.”
“Tell him everything, Noah. Don’t keep it in anymore.”
“Okay.” I jumped up and hurried over to Zane. “Hey, bro. Do you think we can talk for a moment?”
“Uh, sure?” He looked at me quizzically and I glanced at Lucky, who nodded at me with a quick smile.
“Sidney said we can go in his study.”
“Okay, then.” He put down his cup and saucer and followed me to the study. I closed the door behind him and we both took a seat. “What’s this about, then? You’re not upset because I brought Robin, are you? I told Lucky I didn’t think it was a good idea.”
“No, I’m not upset.” I smiled at him gently. “I’m glad you brought her. She’s a nice girl, and maybe we can start over again. From the beginning.”
“I didn’t know that you needed to start over.” He gave me a look. “Or are you being overly dramatic?”
Chapter 9
“You have to tell him,” Lucky’s tears dried up on the car ride over to the Johnsons’. “You can’t keep this inside. It’s not healthy for you and it’s not good for Zane, either. He needs to know the truth.”
“I don’t want to break his heart.” I shook my head. “You have to keep this a secret.”
“Noah.” She sighed. “I don’t know if I can keep this from him.”
“Let me do this in my own way.” I looked at her, with my eyes begging her for a reprieve. “Please.”
“He’s going to be at the Johnsons’.” She took a deep breath. “We have a surprise for you. I’m sorry.”
“Oh, no.” I looked at her in fear. “What did you do?”
“I’m sorry, Noah, but Zane went and picked Robin up. She will most probably be inside with the Johnsons as well.”
“What?” I shouted. “Why would you do that?”
“You’ve been so lonely this last week. I know you guys had an attraction and I convinced Zane that it was in your best interest to bring her over this afternoon. I’m sorry.”
“Fuck, I can’t believe you did that.” I clenched my fists. “I don’t need you interfering with my love life, Lucky.”
“I’m sorry.” She looked at me with huge eyes. “I made a mistake. I thought it would help. I didn’t realize, well, you know. I didn’t realize that you had so much going on.”
“I have nothing to say to Robin, Lucky. If I wanted to talk to her, I would have called her and asked her out on a date.”
“I don’t believe you.” She shook her head. “You’re scared, Noah. I don’t know what that girl did to you in Palm Bonita, but you don’t owe her anything. She missed out. You’re a good guy and you deserve better.”
“I don’t miss the girl I dated.” I sighed. “You have it all wrong. It’s a lot more complicated than you think.”
“Well, maybe if you didn’t keep everything to yourself I’d know why you’re still so hung up on Skylar, who frankly sounds like a bit of a bitch.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about, Lucky.” I shook my head and got out of the car. “You have absolutely no idea.”
“I’m sorry, Noah. I’m just trying to help.”
“You don’t understand, Lucky. You can’t help me. I’m not Zane, you can’t save me.” I shook my head and then lowered my voice as I saw the hurt expression on her face. “Look, I know you’re trying to help. But this is not something you can fix.” I grabbed her hand. “Maybe in another life, in another world.” I shrugged as I stared into her face. “Like I said before, Zane won the jackpot when he found you, Lucky. If he hadn’t found you first, I would have done my darndest to get you for myself.” I laughed at the shocked look on her face. “Don’t worry, I’m not trying to steal you away. I just want you to know that I appreciate you more than you know. But you can’t fix this, Lucky, and you can’t fix me.”
“I understand.” She squeezed my hand. “But there’s a girl in there who could be a part of that process. And I don’t want you to miss out on that because of your demons.”
“You’re not going to give up are you?” I shook my head exasperated.
“No, I’m not. Not with that and not about anything else. Tell Zane the truth, please, Noah.” She whispered up to me. “It won’t break him. I promise you. He deserves to know. He’s hurting more now then you’ll ever know.”
“You don’t know everything, Lucky.” I looked at her with a strained expression. “There’s more to the story.”
“Tell him, Noah.” She said firmly. “It’s not up to you to protect him.”
“He’s my brother. That’s my job.” I argued.
“No, Noah. Your job is to love him and to be honest with him. Always. No matter how hard or difficult it is. You need to be honest with him. You can’t shield him from the truth.” She took a deep breath. “Because the truth always has a habit of getting out. And you don’t want him to find out from someone else, do you?”
I shook my head and I realized that she was correct. There was no way that I was going to be able to keep this a secret from Zane forever. He would find out eventually, and if he found out from someone else, he would resent me forever. I knew Lucky was right. I had to tell him. Even if that meant breaking him down again. I hated to do it, but I knew that our relationship would never be without a strain if I didn’t come clean.
“Hey, you two.” Sidney opened the door and waved us in. “I wasn’t sure if you were going to make it in.”
“I was just talking to Noah. Sorry, Sidney.” She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “How are you?”
“Good. Your lovely fiancée and his friend are inside.” Sidney grinned and closed the door behind us. “Though, I think she may be more of Noah’s friend, yes?”
“You’re so astute, Sidney.” Lucky smiled at him and they walked arm-in-arm. I took a deep breath to steady the nerves that had suddenly hit me. I suddenly had nerves in my stomach and I realized that I was excited to see Robin.
“Hey, Noah.” Betty rushed over to me and gave me a hug. “I just can’t get over seeing you.”
“I missed you as well, Betty.”
“Boy, do you know how many tears I shed for you?” She shook her head and shuddered. “But all’s well that ends well.”
“Yes.” I smiled at her warmly and gave her cheek a big kiss. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise as I heard footsteps walk into the room. I turned around slowly and saw Robin standing there, looking at me shyly. “Hi.”
“Hi,” she responded back and gave me a quick smile.
“It’s good to see you.”
“You, too.” Her eyes searched mine, and before I knew what I was doing I had stepped towards her, brought her into my arms, and given her a kiss on the lips. “Why, hello to you, too,” she laughed, flushing a little.
“I hope that was okay.”
“It was more than okay.” She giggled and touched her lips quickly. “You taste like chocolate.”
“Good taste buds.” I smiled. “I had a hot chocolate before I got here. Lucky gave me one before we left the house to calm down my nerves.”
“That doesn’t sound too good.” She looked at me curiously.
“It’s not that good.” I sighed. “But I’m better now. How did your audition go?” I changed the subject and she shook her head and made a face.
“Let’s just say I’m not interested in dying my hair purple and getting 48DDD implants for a role.”
“You’re not?” I laughed, and turned around when I realized that everyone in the room was staring at us.
“Hey, bro.” Zane winked at me. “Maybe you can save the chat-up lines for tonight.”
“I’m not …” I glared at him. “What are you doing here anyway?”
“I came to see what’s going on with the documentary.” He shrugged. “Plus, I had a special delivery to make. You can thank me later.”
“Thanks, Santa Claus.” I rolled my eyes and then turned to Robin quickly. “Not that I’m saying you’re my present or anything. Trust me, I am not objectifying you.”
“Uh, thanks, I guess.” She laughed and made a face. “I know you most probably think I’m crazy and quick to ignite, but I’m really not like fireworks. You don’t have to be that careful around me.”
“I think I’d rather be more careful than not right now.” I smiled.
“Fair enough.”
“So would anyone like tea and cookies?” Betty picked up her teapot. “I just boiled some water, so it should still be hot.”
“Betty, get the kids some Cokes. Not everyone wants tea.” Sidney responded to her, and she glared at him.
“I’ll have some tea, thanks Betty.”
“Of course you would, Noah.” Sidney smiled at me. “Let’s all go sit down. I’ve got old bones, you know.”
“You’ve got old everything, Sidney Johnson.” Betty handed me a plate of cookies. “Let the children relax for a moment before you have them working.”
“It’s okay.” I grinned at her. “I’m pretty excited to talk about what I’ve been working on.” I followed Sidney to the couch and sat down. He leaned over to me and gave me a stern look. “You told your brother the truth yet?”
“No.” I shook my head. “Soon.”
“I still got them papers.” He sat back. “You let me know when you want them.”
“I’ll let you know,” I nodded.
“So who’s the girl?” Sidney continued and nodded towards Robin, who was standing next to Lucky and laughing at something. “She’s real pretty.”
“She’s just a friend.”
“Seems like more than a friend to me.” He looked down at his wedding ring. “I mean, I’ve only been married for a few hundred years. I don’t know much about love and them things.”
“Sidney.” I admonished him. “I don’t love her.” I hissed quietly to make sure no one else could hear us. “I barely know her. We barely went on one quasi-date.”
“She gets to you though.” He looked at me thoughtfully. “You get to her as well.”
“She’s fragile.” I sighed.
“Yes. I’m glad you see it. She has a hard exterior. But it’s a shell that’s easily broken. She’s got a story, that one. Be careful not to break her heart.”
“I would never do that,” I retorted, angry that he thought I was capable of such a thing.
“You need to finish your business off in Palm Bonita before you start dating anyone new.” He stared into my eyes seriously. “That’s some serious business you’re involved in, Noah. You got to be careful.”
“I am being careful.” I sighed. “Did you speak to your son?”
“Yes.” He nodded. “He’s a family attorney in Illinois, though. He said he’s not that familiar with the family court system in Florida.”
“But did he have any advice?” I looked at him bleakly. I had called Sidney earlier in the week and filled him in on the situation with Skylar because I had needed to talk to someone about it. I felt guilty for not telling Zane, but I just wasn’t ready to tell him about everything without going into what had happened with Mom.
“He said that you should just give it up. You’re never going to get her. She’s never going to be yours.” Sidney looked at me bleakly. “He said that it’s admirable how much you love her, but you can’t change the facts.”
“So he thinks I should just give up?” I was angry. “She was counting on me.”
“You aren’t God, Noah. You can’t make miracles happen.”
“I can try.”
“And that’s why I love you, son.” He nodded approvingly. “You don’t give up, no matter how difficult the odds. The world needs more men like you.”
“I haven’t done anything yet.”
“You have a pure heart.” He patted my back. “That’s enough.”
“I’m going to tell Zane.” I blurted out, changing the subject. “I think I’m going to tell him. He has a right to know.”
“That’s what I’ve been telling you.”
“He’s going to be devastated.” I closed my eyes.
“He’s still got a wonderful family.” Sidney’s eyes blazed. “We’re all still one big family.”
“I know.” I smiled at him gratefully. “You’re the granddad we never had.”
“Do you want me to be there when you tell him?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I need to do this alone.”
“Take him into my study.” Sidney nodded as if thinking. “The file you gave me is in my desk, second drawer from the right.”
“I don’t know if I should show him.” I paused. “I was just going to tell him about Mom.”
“Tell him everything, Noah. Don’t keep it in anymore.”
“Okay.” I jumped up and hurried over to Zane. “Hey, bro. Do you think we can talk for a moment?”
“Uh, sure?” He looked at me quizzically and I glanced at Lucky, who nodded at me with a quick smile.
“Sidney said we can go in his study.”
“Okay, then.” He put down his cup and saucer and followed me to the study. I closed the door behind him and we both took a seat. “What’s this about, then? You’re not upset because I brought Robin, are you? I told Lucky I didn’t think it was a good idea.”
“No, I’m not upset.” I smiled at him gently. “I’m glad you brought her. She’s a nice girl, and maybe we can start over again. From the beginning.”
“I didn’t know that you needed to start over.” He gave me a look. “Or are you being overly dramatic?”