This Regret
Page 98
Kenny yanks me harder as Cape shoves his boot into the bike, kicking it over. I stand there, breathing heavily, telling myself to keep it cool. If I make one wrong move then he might just go f**king nuts and kill me. Reacting is what fuels him. I can't have that.
"I will be gone tomorrow," I hiss. "But not before. I have something to deal with first. Now let go!" I pull away from Kenny and fix my shirt. Then I turn around, slamming my fist into the side of his head, knocking him to the ground. "Don't ever f**king touch me again." I look up and brush my shirt off.
Cape smiles as if he enjoyed the show before pointing at Larry to help Kenny up. "You're pretty quick. No f**king shit! Echo is definitely a lot slower. Especially now. Now that he's in a f**king wheel chair!" He screams in my face, spit spewing. He turns to his side show freaks and smiles wickedly. “Show this little shit how we do things around here. Things have changed a bit since last time you were here."
Before I can even blink, Cape's fist smashes into my right eye and my arms are being held back by Larry and Kenny so hard, it feels like the bone is snapping. He hits me one more time before I scream, "Fuck off!" I spit blood onto his boot and he punches me again, causing blood to pool in my mouth.
"Is that how you want to play it?" He holds his knife up, twirls it around and slices a hole into both tires of the Harley, before tearing it through the seat and stabbing it repeatedly with a wide smile. With each slice, I only want to kill him more. "Now that!" He smiles bigger and laughs. "Is how we do it around here. If you don't want to see that pretty little slut and your brother meet this knife next, as I slit their throats, then I suggest you pack a bag and leave. Today . . . and when I say today, I mean you have twenty f**king minutes."
I yank one arm free and get just enough reach to pound it into Cape's mouth, causing him to stumble backwards. "I will f**king kill you. Do you f**king hear me?" I get ready to pull my other arm free, but Cape jumps up and holds his knife to my throat, causing me to still. My heart is pounding so loudly, I'm sure it's echoing off the walls of the garage. I'm on fire right now. "You sick bastard," I mutter.
Cape snickers and points the tip at my throat as if I'm afraid to die. The only thing I'm afraid of, is losing them. If I knew me dying would keep them safe, then I'd say f**king do it. "You f**king know it. So what do you say you run along inside and grab your shit before someone gets hurt. I'd hate to have to kill three people today. I've already had to deal with an ass**le today. I'm tired, dammit."
The boys push me forward into Cape and he shoves me into the bike, kicking my legs out from below me. My face hits the front tire before a boot digs into my head. "Okay, I f**king get it!" I stay down on my knees and grip the motorcycle in my hands. I could kill them for doing this to Adric's old bike, but I can't. There's no way that day could ever come. I have to go. I won't risk my family getting hurt. "I will leave." The boot releases my head and I look up at Cape, placing one hand on the ground to stand back up. "If I leave, you won't hurt them, right? You said you wouldn't f**king hurt them."
A smirk pulls up on one side of his face and it makes my blood pump even more. "Nah, I had my fun already. Seeing you fall in love with your best friend's f**king sister and losing her to your brother. Shit, that makes me happy. That's classic! You're lucky you got the time you did. Now, when you leave, you will be suffering even more. That makes me happy as f**k." He points at his face and smiles big. "See. Happy. As. Fuck."
Shit! That ass**le is right. I pushed her right back into the arms of my brother and now I have no way of telling her . . . I love her. Now, she will never f**king know, but I couldn't tell her about Kade. I couldn't make her hate him because, whether I like it or not, she needs him. He needs her too in some screwed up way. I hate it, but I'm the one that screwed up. I won't let them suffer.
"Well congratufuckinglations, you're an even bigger piece of shit than the last time I saw you. You should be so f**king proud, man." I push past the boys with a shove, put Rayne in her room, shut the door and go to my room to pack some shit. Only the shit I'll need. I don't care about anything else.
I scribble out a note for Phoenix and shove it into the hole of Adric's guitar before hiding in in the closet. After I leave, they'll probably just take a look around for expensive shit and leave. They will probably leave the closet alone. They just want me gone. So I'm giving them what they want in exchange for what I want. My family left alone. The last thing left to do now is text Tyler. I told him this day would come and he never questioned why. He can be trusted.
Hey, bro. Some shit has come up and I have to leave. I can't explain. Make sure Phoenix gets my spare key and tell her to look in the closet for Adric's guitar. I've left a note for her there. Take care of Rayne for me and man . . . thanks for being there for me. Take care of yourself and your new family.
As soon as the message is sent, I slam my phone into the wall, smashing it up completely. Holding my bag over my shoulder, I look around the room one last time before tossing my broken phone into the trash and closing the closet door. The last thing I need them to know is that I left something for Phoenix. I want her to be taken care of when I'm gone. I love her and my family, but they can never find me now. I'm dead to them forever.
Just as I am to myself . . .
Chapter Twenty-Two
Phoenix
I sit on the old worn out swing, listening to Jen talk. At least, I pretend to listen; although, I have a feeling I'm not pulling it off that well. It's been two days since my fight with Kellan and I can't seem to concentrate on anything but that. A part of me wonders if I was too harsh on him. I know he's been through a lot, as have I, but him not telling me the truth is the same as lying. In my eyes it is any way. He may have my best interests at heart, but I’m sick of everyone treating me as if I’m breakable. I can handle whatever he has to say. Aiden used to do me the same way. I would never keep something so important to him, from him. I thought he was better than that. I love him, but I don't know if that's enough anymore. You can’t have love without trust. They go hand in hand. He'd never even said he loved me back anyways. It was a one way street and I've met the dead end.
Then Kade had to jumble up my emotions even more with his comment the other day. He's the one that left, not me. I can't seem to stop thinking about what he meant by that. Was he trying to point out that he thinks Kellan is responsible for the drugs? I don't want to believe that for one second, but it's not looking good on his part, as long as he has secrets.
"I will be gone tomorrow," I hiss. "But not before. I have something to deal with first. Now let go!" I pull away from Kenny and fix my shirt. Then I turn around, slamming my fist into the side of his head, knocking him to the ground. "Don't ever f**king touch me again." I look up and brush my shirt off.
Cape smiles as if he enjoyed the show before pointing at Larry to help Kenny up. "You're pretty quick. No f**king shit! Echo is definitely a lot slower. Especially now. Now that he's in a f**king wheel chair!" He screams in my face, spit spewing. He turns to his side show freaks and smiles wickedly. “Show this little shit how we do things around here. Things have changed a bit since last time you were here."
Before I can even blink, Cape's fist smashes into my right eye and my arms are being held back by Larry and Kenny so hard, it feels like the bone is snapping. He hits me one more time before I scream, "Fuck off!" I spit blood onto his boot and he punches me again, causing blood to pool in my mouth.
"Is that how you want to play it?" He holds his knife up, twirls it around and slices a hole into both tires of the Harley, before tearing it through the seat and stabbing it repeatedly with a wide smile. With each slice, I only want to kill him more. "Now that!" He smiles bigger and laughs. "Is how we do it around here. If you don't want to see that pretty little slut and your brother meet this knife next, as I slit their throats, then I suggest you pack a bag and leave. Today . . . and when I say today, I mean you have twenty f**king minutes."
I yank one arm free and get just enough reach to pound it into Cape's mouth, causing him to stumble backwards. "I will f**king kill you. Do you f**king hear me?" I get ready to pull my other arm free, but Cape jumps up and holds his knife to my throat, causing me to still. My heart is pounding so loudly, I'm sure it's echoing off the walls of the garage. I'm on fire right now. "You sick bastard," I mutter.
Cape snickers and points the tip at my throat as if I'm afraid to die. The only thing I'm afraid of, is losing them. If I knew me dying would keep them safe, then I'd say f**king do it. "You f**king know it. So what do you say you run along inside and grab your shit before someone gets hurt. I'd hate to have to kill three people today. I've already had to deal with an ass**le today. I'm tired, dammit."
The boys push me forward into Cape and he shoves me into the bike, kicking my legs out from below me. My face hits the front tire before a boot digs into my head. "Okay, I f**king get it!" I stay down on my knees and grip the motorcycle in my hands. I could kill them for doing this to Adric's old bike, but I can't. There's no way that day could ever come. I have to go. I won't risk my family getting hurt. "I will leave." The boot releases my head and I look up at Cape, placing one hand on the ground to stand back up. "If I leave, you won't hurt them, right? You said you wouldn't f**king hurt them."
A smirk pulls up on one side of his face and it makes my blood pump even more. "Nah, I had my fun already. Seeing you fall in love with your best friend's f**king sister and losing her to your brother. Shit, that makes me happy. That's classic! You're lucky you got the time you did. Now, when you leave, you will be suffering even more. That makes me happy as f**k." He points at his face and smiles big. "See. Happy. As. Fuck."
Shit! That ass**le is right. I pushed her right back into the arms of my brother and now I have no way of telling her . . . I love her. Now, she will never f**king know, but I couldn't tell her about Kade. I couldn't make her hate him because, whether I like it or not, she needs him. He needs her too in some screwed up way. I hate it, but I'm the one that screwed up. I won't let them suffer.
"Well congratufuckinglations, you're an even bigger piece of shit than the last time I saw you. You should be so f**king proud, man." I push past the boys with a shove, put Rayne in her room, shut the door and go to my room to pack some shit. Only the shit I'll need. I don't care about anything else.
I scribble out a note for Phoenix and shove it into the hole of Adric's guitar before hiding in in the closet. After I leave, they'll probably just take a look around for expensive shit and leave. They will probably leave the closet alone. They just want me gone. So I'm giving them what they want in exchange for what I want. My family left alone. The last thing left to do now is text Tyler. I told him this day would come and he never questioned why. He can be trusted.
Hey, bro. Some shit has come up and I have to leave. I can't explain. Make sure Phoenix gets my spare key and tell her to look in the closet for Adric's guitar. I've left a note for her there. Take care of Rayne for me and man . . . thanks for being there for me. Take care of yourself and your new family.
As soon as the message is sent, I slam my phone into the wall, smashing it up completely. Holding my bag over my shoulder, I look around the room one last time before tossing my broken phone into the trash and closing the closet door. The last thing I need them to know is that I left something for Phoenix. I want her to be taken care of when I'm gone. I love her and my family, but they can never find me now. I'm dead to them forever.
Just as I am to myself . . .
Chapter Twenty-Two
Phoenix
I sit on the old worn out swing, listening to Jen talk. At least, I pretend to listen; although, I have a feeling I'm not pulling it off that well. It's been two days since my fight with Kellan and I can't seem to concentrate on anything but that. A part of me wonders if I was too harsh on him. I know he's been through a lot, as have I, but him not telling me the truth is the same as lying. In my eyes it is any way. He may have my best interests at heart, but I’m sick of everyone treating me as if I’m breakable. I can handle whatever he has to say. Aiden used to do me the same way. I would never keep something so important to him, from him. I thought he was better than that. I love him, but I don't know if that's enough anymore. You can’t have love without trust. They go hand in hand. He'd never even said he loved me back anyways. It was a one way street and I've met the dead end.
Then Kade had to jumble up my emotions even more with his comment the other day. He's the one that left, not me. I can't seem to stop thinking about what he meant by that. Was he trying to point out that he thinks Kellan is responsible for the drugs? I don't want to believe that for one second, but it's not looking good on his part, as long as he has secrets.
