Trying Not to Love You
Page 54
She reached over and grabbed my hand, I sighed with relief. Maybe things would be ok. I could deal with her being upset with me because I was upset with myself.
"MacKenzie," She squeezed my hand. "I can see how upset this is making you and it should. You have such a bright future ahead of you. I'm not saying you can't have that now, but it's going to be a struggle." A few tears fell from her eyes. "I didn't want this to happen to you. I am disappointed, but it has happened and now we have to deal with it. We, sweetie, not just you. Your whole family is here for you."
The tears flow freely now, and my mom wraps me in her arms and shushes me.
"I take it you haven't told anyone yet?" She asks, running her hands through my hair.
"Not really, only Chloe, Hailey and Dominic." I said through the sobs.
"Dominic?" I knew she would be surprised. After all, she knows I don't talk to him anymore.
"Yeah, he's actually the one that bought me the test. Logan, the guy I work with, figured it out pretty quickly. He told Dominic that I was acting the same way his sister did over winter break. I think that's why Dominic took us home. Any other reason and I don't think he would have chanced it with Hunter and the boys."
Nodding at me, she said, "You need to tell Hunter sweetie. This isn't something you can hide from him. If he doesn't want any part of this, then it is what it is but I don't think that will happen. Your family is here for you, and before you even ask, yes, they are going to be upset over this, but no one will turn their backs on you or my little grandchild in there." She said as she rubbed my stomach.
Calming down a little, I wiped the final tears out of my eyes, and hugged my mom as tight as I could. "I love you mom."
"Aww, I love you too baby girl." She said hugging me back. "Have you called the doctors or anything yet?"
"No. I have no idea what I need to do, which is another reason I decided to talk to you first."
She took my hand in hers. "Well, first thing we need to do is call and make an appointment to see the ob-gyn. They will have you take a test in the office and will also do some blood work." She stood up, and pulled me up with her. "Let's get back to the house," she pulled her sleeve up to look at her watch. "and make an appointment. Someone should be in the office until noon."
Smiling my first real smile in a few days, I said, "Let's do it."
Mom stopped walking and gave me another apologetic smile. "You are going to have to tell your brothers and your father, but I'll be there with you."
"Well, Mason was pissed at me already, so I might as well add this to his list of reasons now; I just hope he doesn't murder Hunter. I know Coop and Jackson will be upset with me. And dad, ugh I don't even want to think about it."
"We will get through it as a family sweetie."
27
Mom was able to pull some strings and got me an appointment for Monday morning to see the ob-gyn. They confirmed that I was indeed pregnant, and they did some blood work to confirm how far along I was and give me a better due date. They told me I would have the results back in a day or so. Until I got the results back, I was staying clear of everyone.
Wednesday night Mom and I decided to get some ice cream and sneak off to the bookstore to get me some books on my pregnancy. Chloe surprised us back at the house with a few things for me as well, and we went into the sitting room to talk about the wedding.
"Chloe, I'm going to look like a whale in your wedding. I really would just rather do something else special for you." I begged her.
Glaring at me, she said "Oh no, I need you there with me. You are my maid of honor and you cannot back out on me. It's not an option."
"Come on Chloe, you really want to take pictures with Shamu standing next to you? I'll probably be waddling like a duck, walking down the aisle." I started laughing picturing it.
Mom joined in on laughing at me too, and Chloe was still glaring at me. "Just because you went and got knocked up doesn't mean…"
I heard someone clear there throat behind me. Oh, please be Hailey, please!
Chloe and Mom turned their head, but I knew who it was, felt who it was. Once they saw who it was, they looked right at me and confirmed what I already knew.
"Hello Hunter, the boys aren't here. I think they went to the movies or something." Mom told him.
"Yeah I know. Can I uh, talk to CC alone?" Hunter asked them.
"You ok?" Chloe asked, looking at me apologetically.
I could feel my cheeks starting to burn red, and I didn't trust my voice to speak just yet, so I just nodded my head. I folded my hands in my lap, and curled my legs Indian style on the couch. Chloe and mom got up, but mom stopped, kissed the side of my head and whispered, "Tell him sweetie. I think he may just surprise you." I just nodded.
They walked out, and Hunter came to sit across from me. He didn't say anything. He just looked at me. I started biting my lip, nervous about this conversation. This could be the end of us, the end of us all being a family. No more holidays, Sunday dinners, birthdays, graduations, no nothing if this didn't go over well. I looked away from him and glanced down at the table that was between us where the baby books and magazines were sitting.
Hunter cleared his throat again, and looked down at the table where I was looking. If he didn't have an idea what we were talking about before, he sure did now. I watched his face closely as he was putting two and two together. "So um…" He scratched the scuff that was on his face. He looked at the books and back up at me. "Are they yours?"
My hands were sweating; I was shaking, "Yeah."
His eyes went wide, "You're pregnant?"
I nodded.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, looking a little hurt.
"Hunter, just listen to me for a minute, okay? You are twenty-two, and ready to graduate from college in a few months. I don't want this to stop you from making something of yourself. Just because this baby is ours doesn't mean you have to be with us." I stood up from the couch and started pacing. "I want to be with you, Christ knows I do. Don't get me wrong. I can raise this baby on my own. You didn't ask for this and I don't want you to think I trapped you."
"Are you done?" He asked with a smirk on his face.
"Yes."
"CC, I love you more than you will ever know. I never stopped. I understand why you haven't told me, why you didn't come to me first. I've been an ass**le." He stood up, and came over to me, grabbed both of my hands with his, and pulled them between us. "I'm sorry; I didn't know what to do. Our families are so close, and I felt like I was ruining it. I broke my promise to you that I wouldn't break your heart. I need to make that up to you."
"MacKenzie," She squeezed my hand. "I can see how upset this is making you and it should. You have such a bright future ahead of you. I'm not saying you can't have that now, but it's going to be a struggle." A few tears fell from her eyes. "I didn't want this to happen to you. I am disappointed, but it has happened and now we have to deal with it. We, sweetie, not just you. Your whole family is here for you."
The tears flow freely now, and my mom wraps me in her arms and shushes me.
"I take it you haven't told anyone yet?" She asks, running her hands through my hair.
"Not really, only Chloe, Hailey and Dominic." I said through the sobs.
"Dominic?" I knew she would be surprised. After all, she knows I don't talk to him anymore.
"Yeah, he's actually the one that bought me the test. Logan, the guy I work with, figured it out pretty quickly. He told Dominic that I was acting the same way his sister did over winter break. I think that's why Dominic took us home. Any other reason and I don't think he would have chanced it with Hunter and the boys."
Nodding at me, she said, "You need to tell Hunter sweetie. This isn't something you can hide from him. If he doesn't want any part of this, then it is what it is but I don't think that will happen. Your family is here for you, and before you even ask, yes, they are going to be upset over this, but no one will turn their backs on you or my little grandchild in there." She said as she rubbed my stomach.
Calming down a little, I wiped the final tears out of my eyes, and hugged my mom as tight as I could. "I love you mom."
"Aww, I love you too baby girl." She said hugging me back. "Have you called the doctors or anything yet?"
"No. I have no idea what I need to do, which is another reason I decided to talk to you first."
She took my hand in hers. "Well, first thing we need to do is call and make an appointment to see the ob-gyn. They will have you take a test in the office and will also do some blood work." She stood up, and pulled me up with her. "Let's get back to the house," she pulled her sleeve up to look at her watch. "and make an appointment. Someone should be in the office until noon."
Smiling my first real smile in a few days, I said, "Let's do it."
Mom stopped walking and gave me another apologetic smile. "You are going to have to tell your brothers and your father, but I'll be there with you."
"Well, Mason was pissed at me already, so I might as well add this to his list of reasons now; I just hope he doesn't murder Hunter. I know Coop and Jackson will be upset with me. And dad, ugh I don't even want to think about it."
"We will get through it as a family sweetie."
27
Mom was able to pull some strings and got me an appointment for Monday morning to see the ob-gyn. They confirmed that I was indeed pregnant, and they did some blood work to confirm how far along I was and give me a better due date. They told me I would have the results back in a day or so. Until I got the results back, I was staying clear of everyone.
Wednesday night Mom and I decided to get some ice cream and sneak off to the bookstore to get me some books on my pregnancy. Chloe surprised us back at the house with a few things for me as well, and we went into the sitting room to talk about the wedding.
"Chloe, I'm going to look like a whale in your wedding. I really would just rather do something else special for you." I begged her.
Glaring at me, she said "Oh no, I need you there with me. You are my maid of honor and you cannot back out on me. It's not an option."
"Come on Chloe, you really want to take pictures with Shamu standing next to you? I'll probably be waddling like a duck, walking down the aisle." I started laughing picturing it.
Mom joined in on laughing at me too, and Chloe was still glaring at me. "Just because you went and got knocked up doesn't mean…"
I heard someone clear there throat behind me. Oh, please be Hailey, please!
Chloe and Mom turned their head, but I knew who it was, felt who it was. Once they saw who it was, they looked right at me and confirmed what I already knew.
"Hello Hunter, the boys aren't here. I think they went to the movies or something." Mom told him.
"Yeah I know. Can I uh, talk to CC alone?" Hunter asked them.
"You ok?" Chloe asked, looking at me apologetically.
I could feel my cheeks starting to burn red, and I didn't trust my voice to speak just yet, so I just nodded my head. I folded my hands in my lap, and curled my legs Indian style on the couch. Chloe and mom got up, but mom stopped, kissed the side of my head and whispered, "Tell him sweetie. I think he may just surprise you." I just nodded.
They walked out, and Hunter came to sit across from me. He didn't say anything. He just looked at me. I started biting my lip, nervous about this conversation. This could be the end of us, the end of us all being a family. No more holidays, Sunday dinners, birthdays, graduations, no nothing if this didn't go over well. I looked away from him and glanced down at the table that was between us where the baby books and magazines were sitting.
Hunter cleared his throat again, and looked down at the table where I was looking. If he didn't have an idea what we were talking about before, he sure did now. I watched his face closely as he was putting two and two together. "So um…" He scratched the scuff that was on his face. He looked at the books and back up at me. "Are they yours?"
My hands were sweating; I was shaking, "Yeah."
His eyes went wide, "You're pregnant?"
I nodded.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, looking a little hurt.
"Hunter, just listen to me for a minute, okay? You are twenty-two, and ready to graduate from college in a few months. I don't want this to stop you from making something of yourself. Just because this baby is ours doesn't mean you have to be with us." I stood up from the couch and started pacing. "I want to be with you, Christ knows I do. Don't get me wrong. I can raise this baby on my own. You didn't ask for this and I don't want you to think I trapped you."
"Are you done?" He asked with a smirk on his face.
"Yes."
"CC, I love you more than you will ever know. I never stopped. I understand why you haven't told me, why you didn't come to me first. I've been an ass**le." He stood up, and came over to me, grabbed both of my hands with his, and pulled them between us. "I'm sorry; I didn't know what to do. Our families are so close, and I felt like I was ruining it. I broke my promise to you that I wouldn't break your heart. I need to make that up to you."
